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Click hereGwyneth was his goat from Leviticus
whenever she bleached Father’s accidents
whose battle with death at that stage of grief
did not want a truce for anything
while Mother spilled tea again in the kitchen,
regretting each day by the River Dee
and dreamed how pretty she once must have been.
Looking for something to eat for dinner,
Mother took bara brith from the freezer,
ignoring initials carved in the crust
of her husband for neighborhood old men
who swore that his spirit never would rest
when Gwilym’s body was laid in the ground
unless they drank ale with some of his bread.
She remembers those last days with Father
and the one son in North America
who comes to visit every third Christmas
at the Lady Forester Nursing Home
where this very day she met a new nurse
whose eyebrows frowned when Gwyneth requested
a small keg of ale and bag of flour.
If I'm honest I haven't a clue what this poem is about but that is not to dismiss it, I find the language intriguing and surreal, which is a good thing but makes it difficult to make a constructive comment.
One line that jolted was ....... "and dreamed how pretty she once must have been"...would she have dreamed how pretty she once was, wouldn't she have lamented at losing her looks?
Well written, most comments already made. Seems so personal I don't like to intrude.
and so his sins might be consumed, in the eating and the drinking, that his soul may then lay at rest and not be wanderin' about, causing troubles to those still walking the green earth...
this does smack of the personal, and considering your recent posts why wouldn't it? it wraps a whole community of colour and habit around acceptance, time and the changes it brings to a society's habits...
solid 5.
obscure? i didn't find it so. a warmth and a chill both addressed? yes.
(5) This is a nice effect that the fifth and seventh line of the stanza's are simple lines. As a sort of return for the reader, from what is obscure.
whenever she bleached Fathers accidents
is a very good line. anon enjoyed your poem. gave it a 5
Hmmm, Green. I sort of get it. I think this one might be coming from the personal rather than the general so is hard to follow. You write so well though, so vividly.