The Office Slut Rules

Being a girl is a blessing and a curse,
In a world where men dominate, we try to disperse,
And find our place in a workplace so male,
But to survive, we need to follow these details.

Rule 1 tells us to aim to please,
To be angelic and allow them to breeze,
Through their day without any hassle,
A smile does more than being pushy and nasal.

Rule 2 suggests we shouldn't be rude,
We shouldn't talk over and be subdued,
Arguing with men is not worth our time,
We should keep our thoughts to ourselves and mime.

Rule 3 advises us to ask for help,
From so-called 'superiors,' who often yelp,
Assume they know best and always inquire,
So as not to impede our progress, keep from the mire.

Rule 4 emphasizes that we should show gratitude,
Praise men every chance we get lewd,
Even exaggerate their achievements,
To make sure they know they are the truly gifted.

Rule 5 says to be an 'eye candy,'
A pretty face in an office that's just dandy,
Qualifications don't matter half as much,
As being the girl that they can touch.

Rule 6 tells us to be a sport,
Not take offense when they make a snort,
At our expense, laugh it off and flirt,
Sexual innuendos are a girl's dessert.

Rule 7 instructs us to always see their needs,
Bring them coffee or sandwiches at high speeds,
Even treat them to our homemade foods,
For that will earn us their gratitude.

Rule 8 says we shouldn't bother,
With what other women might say or harbor,
Jealousy is their game, let it not be ours,
Just keep doing our job and be full of powers.

Rule 9 is for us to not be nosy,
About their home life, that's downright rosy,
Just make them comfortable at work,
And avoid gossip that might make us look like jerks.

Rule 10 says to keep the office rules outside as well,
Even when we bump into a colleague after the office bell,
Join them for lunch or parties they invite us to attend,
And help them buy something for their significant other like a friend.

Being a girl is not always easy,
In a world that's so full of men and sleazy,
But rules like these help us find our way,
And survive another day in the workplace fray.