Throuple Wives

I have been spending
far more time
with her
than I have with you
Which means we talk
A lot
About our Throupleness
About your relationship
with me
About your relationship
with her

And my heart breaks
for her jealousy
over who you are
with me
But not as much
as it breaks
for mine
over who you are
with her

She tells me
even though
you are more like
roommates
than lovers
you still
like her

And even that
makes me
so angry

I want you
to like me more
I want you
to not like
her
at all
I want you to be
not only my lover
I want you to be
My home
My partner
My always

I don't know how
to make that happen
and still keep her
as my best friend

I want her to be happy
I do
But not with my boyfriend
Even though my boyfriend
is her husband

I want to
believe her
when she says
you don't care
about getting laid
about getting head
I am glad
You do not do
those things
with her
I do not tell her
you very much do
with me
And that you
very much enjoy
being
in my body
in my mouth
in my bed

It is good to know
that you are not
in her body
in her mouth
Even though you are
in her bed
every night
even
after you leave
mine

At least for now

She tells me
she would like
her own bedroom
her own bed
She tells me
there is
no good reason
for the two of you
to share a bed
anymore
She tells me
there is nothing
between you
other than
pillows
and sheets
and silence

I do not tell her
that you wrap yourself
around a pillow
while you sleep
and when you wake up
and pretend
that it is me

I encourage her
to leave your bed
to claim a space that's
just hers
I encourage her
to further
the distance
between you

I am playing
a dangerous game
Walking
a thin tightrope
Straddling
a high fence

I worry
That I will fail
That I will fall
That I will land
On the wrong side
Alone

You and I have
settled
into the comfort of
loving each other

I no longer feel
like she lets me
borrow you

I feel
like you were mine
all along
and she
is an obstacle
to our happiness

She doesn't deserve you
She has told me
in a drunken truth whisper
that she does not
love you
anymore

And yet you stay
And yet she stays

And I am on the side
whenever either of you
want me
need me

Sometimes I feel
Used
Taken for granted
Neglected

You say you always
think about me
Worry about me
Want me

But
No matter how hard I try
She will always be the priority
And I will always be
Last
Even though
I always put you
First

And even though
she has told me
she doesn't want you
she doesn't love you
she is still
staking her claim on you
being territorial
and is spending more time
with me
so that I spend less time
with you

And even though
you have told me
you don't want her
you are not attracted to her
you are not in love with her
you still go home to her
you still take care of her
and I am still not
the first person
you see in the morning or
the last person
you see at night.
I am still
not
yours.

I see you less
and less
And I want you more
and more
And I am beginning to realize
That even though
you have two women
She is your wife
And I am just
her friend
and your
whore