Your Pieces Don't Fit

Everyone wants to tell you what to do, and what's good for you. They don't want you to find your own answers, they want you to believe theirs.

Sometimes. you need to find your way in life when nothing makes sense. When the answers others offer you don't align with your truth. You owe it to yourself to live your life the way you see fit. Know who you are, and love who you are.

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YOUR PIECES DON'T FIT

Too young to have you awaken his demon's.
And your anger that caused devastation,
Splitting me open into fragmentation.
All that little boys pieces were scattered,
His innocence was all that mattered.

Just because you thought it was justified,
through all the tears that I cried,
Through all the years that you lied.
All his hopes you were discarding,
all his growth you were retarding.

Because I carried the pain that you deny,
Sweeping those bones under the rug.
Keeping my hurts out of your sight,
And all your self hatred was my blight.
Just words to you, but they ripped me apart.
A thousand cuts from your wicked tongue,
with salt pouring from their cruel taunts,
It was nothing much to you, but they devoured pieces of me.
Just like hooks tearing into my heart.

I bathed in the sewage of your loathing.
Like bullshit that clings to my soul.
Like a freak out of control.
Your mind fuck games grow so old.
And that's why I seem so cold.
You always do as you're told.
You're so god damn shallow,
With all the fears that you swallow.

And left with a crushing feeling that has no name.
And the reasons for your abuse are so fucking lame.

It's like falling into the depths of your ignorant ways.
Though tearful nights in a blackened haze.

But I can no longer take this,
I can no longer fake this.
Just because you want to pretend,
But the truth will win in the end.

Yet as sand falling through an hourglass,
All this torment one day will pass.....

When you don't wanna jump but you're tired of just existing.
All that pain that gnaws and keeps persisting.
Just to feel something real again,
besides the pain that numbs the heart and fogs the brain.

Like seeing life distorted through a glass darkly.
Trapped inside this prison, seeing life through a distorted prism.
And all the times that I died,
from dark things that hunt inside.
To welcome me into their dark.

But since then I have faced my demon's,
While you deny through all the season's.
I'm a question you cannot answer,
So I'll find my purpose and my reasons,
through all my life's seasons.
And your blind eyes still cannot see.

But I couldn't feel my soul, I felt so distant.
But somedays, it all came back in an instant.

Past and future now colliding,
Dreams and pains all subsiding.
Self hatred no longer so dividing.
Like a phoenix I see it rising.
Through the fire of a funeral pyre,
all the broken pieces of me I burned into ash.
All your pieces won't ever last.
The dragons of your judgments have been slain by me.

I tossed your garbage in the gutter,
I'm clearing out your clutter.
I'm gonna make my heart my home.
As I find my pieces that you scattered,
Now I know I'm what mattered.

It's like driving through hell chained to the wheel,
only wanting to breathe again so I can feel.
I wanna smash the clock of time so this pain I can erase.
But some things time just won't heal, so there are things I must face.
And I face it with all my courage,
even though you would discourage.
I don't want your mold, I'll never fall in line,
I always felt out of place and out of time.
But my truth is something so sublime.
Like a blackness that threatened to devour.
Robbing me of all my power,
but I reached a crucial hour.

And I am not your fucking clone, so now you wanna disown.
And you hide behind your masks,
And not just the one you wear on your face.
Because the truth you so readily displace.

You called me a coward, but I put all my pieces back.
And I did it all on my own.
I had no other choice,
and now I have found my own voice.

Your prison is what I've dismantled.
And I won't prove you right through self destruction.
And I see through your lies with this deconstruction.
I'm not a voice of your dysfunction.

I'm not a part of your family puppet show.
In your ignorance you call it my arrogance.
But you are mistaken, I just dropped all your nonsense that I have forsaken.

I now speak truths beyond your understanding,
because you're still not comprehending.
I have bent, but I won't break.
My faith in me is more than you can take.
This is my life and I take center stage.
And I'll bleed these words right onto the page.
Because someone needs to see my message so I'll never stop.
You pushed me to rock bottom, but I'll rise up the top

And now I will fly, I might fail and fall.
But it's better than being at your feet where I would crawl.

Why the fuck would I explain myself to someone that doesn't wanna know?
I cannot find wholeness with the pieces you left me. I must reclaim all that I left behind.

You call me a victim, but you're a fucking liar....a victim would stay, taking your abuse day after day. I am no longer your useful pawn.
But I'm leaving now, and my life has new meaning at a new dawn