1,001 Nights: Prologue 02bysensualwriter©
"You're insane," Rebecca said.
"I'm not insane." Sara folded her arms under her breasts and leaned back in her chair, unable to meet Rebeccas' gaze across the tiny table.
"Let me get this straight:" Rebecca leaned forward over the table, willing Sara to meet her eyes. "You're going to go one thousand and one nights having sex with a different person every night?"
"Oh, okay, then. I take it back, you're not insane. You're fucking nuts." Rebecca slammed her glass onto the table harder than she intended. "What the fuck kind of plan is that? What happened to 'I'm going to swear off men for a year to get my life in order'?"
"I don't know how to make you to understand." Sara's eyes roamed around the room, looking for something, anything to look at that would allow her to avoid Rebecca's gaze.
They'd been best friends for five years after having known each other for only a few months. They had met online, in a chat room of all places, and found in each other their polar opposites and identical doubles all in one person. Where Rebecca was weak, Sara was strong. Where Sara needed help, Rebecca was an expert. They shared almost identical interests, and spent much of their free time together, enjoying the same hobbies, movies, music, and foods. They seemed to share a wavelength to which no one else was attuned.
They also shared each others' bed, once. Sara had been with another woman before they met; Rebecca had always been curious. One night over drinks the subject came up. They had a moment, which became a kiss, which became more. It had been everything both of them had hoped for, tender, passionate, unending, and utterly satisfying. Neither of them was disappointed. They talked about it incessantly, the risks of a sexual relationship to their friendship, the reaction of their friends and families, their goals for the future, marriage, children, every detail they could imagine. Though they couldn't rule out a future together, it wasn't what Sara had imagined for herself, though Rebecca seemed more open to pursuing it to see where it led. They had agreed that if they were carried away in a moment of passion, they would let it happen. If a shared need was felt, they would allow themselves to indulge, but that they would focus on maintaining their friendship, fostering the empathic familiarity they shared. Both agreed that their friendship was too valuable to jeopardize.
Their friendship grew stronger with each passing year. Without words, each knew when the other needed a shoulder to cry on, time alone, or a night out, and somehow their needs coincided often enough that they did nearly everything together. When Sara came home on Friday after a long week at work, ready for a night out at the clubs, Rebecca was getting ready to go out dancing. When Rebecca had broken off a relationship and needed a night home watching chick flicks, Sara had brought home the latest tear-jerker. It was almost as if they shared a psychic bond, each privy to the others' innermost thoughts, which was why Rebecca was so stunned by Sara's unforeseen plan.
"Listen, I know you like sex, but..." Rebecca let her sentence trail off.
"I don't just like sex, Rebecca. I crave it constantly. I need it."
"Maybe you should talk to somebody about that."
"Like what, a shrink? Cause they did so much good the last time." Sara had been forced to see a shrink as a teenager by her parents and school counselors. Rebellious by nature, it had not been a beneficial experience.
"Maybe you need to give it a chance. You're not a child anymore. If you approach it from the right perspective..."
"I'm not seeing a shrink."
"Okay, fine," Rebecca straightened in her chair. "You need sex constantly and you won't talk to anyone about it. Aren't there safer ways to get it regularly without fucking a thousand guys?"
"They don't all have to be guys..."
"Damn it, don't be a smartass; you know what I mean. What about masturbation? What about one steady person? Someone willing to try new things with you."
"Masturbation doesn't always cut it," Sara knew Rebecca could understand that. "And there's things I couldn't ask of just one person. Things I..." She trailed off, unable to finish her thought.
"There's got to be something less risky, something safer."
"I'm sorry. It's just that... you don't understand. There're things I'm curious about. Things I've never tried. Something has to satisfy me. Something has to..." Sara couldn't finish her sentence. She knew what she wanted to say, but she lacked the words to express herself fully.
She needed to do this. She wanted to do this. It wasn't the plan that she needed, it was the experience. Sure, she could get her experiences without taking things to this level, but it gave her a framework, a goal, something to focus on while she experimented and experienced everything she could think of sexually. This wasn't something she needed to do per se, but it was something she wanted, something she felt she had to do. It was almost as if it were a trial, a process she would force herself to undergo, an experience she didn't choose herself, but to which she was subjected by the forces that drove her through life. Something inside her had developed this idea, and she felt forced to comply with the plan now that she had voiced it.
"Sara..." Rebecca tried to get her attention, moving her face into Saras' line of view.
"I don't want to argue with you." Sara made the statement with a note of resignation in her voice, as if what she wanted had no bearing on where the conversation would go. She lifted her gaze to meet Rebecca's.
"I'm not arguing with you, I'm just..." Rebecca searched for words, "concerned. I mean, we've talked about a lot of stuff. We've shared our fantasies, each other. You know what I want, I thought I knew what you wanted. I thought we knew each other, but... this is just surprising, that's all, and it doesn't sound like a good idea. I mean, where did this come from?"
"I don't know. I really don't. I just... I don't know." Tears welled up in Sara's eyes. She blinked them back, hoping Rebecca wouldn't see, but knowing she did.
"Sara..." Rebecca took Saras' hand and squeezed it, eyebrows knotted in empathy, a lump forming in her throat.
"I don't want this to come between us." Sara felt the tears burn hotter, knowing she was holding back a floodgate with nothing but eyelashes. "You're my best friend. You're the only person who has ever understood anything about me. I didn't want to tell anyone about this. I was just going to do it, but I felt like I needed to tell you... like I needed you to understand."
"I'm trying to understand." Rebecca wrapped Saras' hand in both of hers, arms extended across the small table.
Now that the initial shock had worn off, Sara knew she could take her time and explain it to Rebecca. She knew there would be questions, but she'd be able to answer them and, even if she couldn't make Rebecca understand or accept her idea, she could at least defend herself to the point where Rebecca wouldn't be as completely opposed to the idea as she had been. She might even be able to convince Rebecca of why she needed to do this; perhaps the conversation would help her better understand her own motives.