2 Broke Bitches

2 Broke Bitches

By : DickThePimp

Pure filthy fantasy... Trashy parody of the sitcom 2 Broke Girls... Cast and story changes and a location change to Hollywood as well... Wayyyyyy dirtier than the show... Read on fellow pervs

Cast :

Max (Kat Dennings)

Penny (Kaley Cuoco/The Big Bang Theory)

Spence (The King Of Queens)

Ellsworth (Former WWE Superstar James Ellsworth)

Serena (Serena Williams)

Sofia (Sofia Vergara)

Kelly (Kelly Madison)

And

James (Me)

"Damn, Penny... We are some broke ass bitches!"

"Oh my God! We don't have any money! Where did it all go?"

"Well... probably, at least some of it went to your acting lessons and Brazilian waxes... and to my little weed habit... and our ill fated cupcake business too. Just saying."

"This is ridiculous. We've been working at that diner for five years and we have nothing to show for it. Nothing!" Penny drops down on the sofa, depressed and shocked by her, and her roommate Max's current, rather depressing, financial dilemma.

"It'll be OK... DAMN! I'M OUTTA WEED!... Maybe it won't be alright." Max throws her lighter back on the coffee table when she can't find any smoke.

There's a knock on the door. Max answers it. "Things will definitely be alright." Max smiles real bright. "Thank you, baby." She blows me a real slutty kiss. I'm standing in the doorway holding up a bag of weed. Max very happily... and very quickly... grabs it, kisses and hugs me, then hurries off to get some papers to roll a few joints.

"Hey, James."

"Hey, Penny. Why so sad, baby?" I sit beside her on the sofa.

"I'm so depressed." Penny lays her blonde head on my shoulder.

"What's wrong?"

"We have no money, and it's so depressing. Nothing! Nada! We've been working at the diner for five years, and nothing! I feel like just giving up."

I look Penny in the face and smile, wiping her tears. "It'll be fine, sweetheart. I promise. No need to get all depressed. OK?" I give her my most reassuring, sweetest smile.

"Ok. I sure hope you're right though. It's tough. We need to start making some money." Penny and I hug nice and tight. We're really close. We used to date, and we've stayed really close friends.

"Ok... break it up. Don't be trying to steal my man, Penny." Max walks in, grinning from ear to ear with four joints perfectly rolled.

We light up and chill on the sofa. Sweet smoke everywhere. Max and I share a joint. Penny smokes her own. Max puffs hard, exhales, puffs again, then turns her head to me and kisses me, sharing the smoke as we kiss. Damn... I love this chick. She smiles nice and big, kisses me again, licks my smokey lips, then puts the joint in my mouth. Such a sweetheart.

"What about Leonard?" I ask Penny about her scientist boyfriend.

"He's on an assignment in Sweden. Some physics crap. The asshole didn't even offer to take me either."

"Idiot. A super hot piece of ass like you would make a hella good hotel hump buddy over there." I shoot a playful smirk and wink at Penny. She laughs.

"Thanks, sweetie." Penny smiles so pretty and blows me a sweet, smokey kiss. I nod... and squeeze Max's big baddass titties through her black and white, THE CLASH tee shirt.

Another knock on the door...

Penny answers this time. It's Sofia. She's their landlord. She lives downstairs. Sofia saunters in, in her leopard print, skin tight spandex bodysuit. Sorta ala Peg Bundy back in the late 80's. Bigger titties though. Brown hair instead of red too... and she's Hispanic.

"Hi dere ladiessss... and Jameseyyyy." Sofia very happily greets everyone in her thick Spanish accent, blowing me a real sexy kiss. She's so vibrant and upbeat... and gorgeousssssss. I can't stop gawking at those big titties pouring outta that low cut, leopard print top. Damn... they're so big, and the top's so tight. A truly spectacular combo.

Sofia joins in the smokey fun, puffing and passing with Penny as we all chill on the sofa. Max... who's sitting in my lap, facing away, puffing and passing back to me.... can't stop playing with my cock through my black leather pants. It draws Sofia's very horny attention pretty darn quick.

"Ayeeeeeee, papi. That's a bigggggggggg cock, dere." I just grin, smoking, then putting the joint in Max's waiting mouth... as she rubs my giant bulge between her legs.

"Fourteen fucking inches, BABY!!!" Max blurts out. Smoke bellowing outta her happily smiling mouth.

"AYEEEEEE CHIWAWA!!! HOLY MIERDA!!! That's bigger than Spence's!" Sofia's gorgeous eyes light up, her jaw dropped. Spence is her dorky ass boyfriend, who's also the cook at the diner Max and Penny work at.

"Biggest cock I've ever seen." Max adds. "... And I've seen a few." She laughs, smokey and happy. My baby's feeling good... and she's feeling my bulge real damn good.

"More than a few. Ha." Penny teases. She blows her smoke at Max, playfully sticking out her tongue at her.

"Well... I want dat one. BADDDDDDD!!!" Sofia points at my bulge, licks those gorgeous, succulent lips, smiling so slutty, and blows me a biggggggg, sexy kiss. Her accent is so thick and so fucking sexy! Fuck!

"Sorry, Sofia. It's all mine." Max is very protective of my... or her... cock. She gets a tad jealous when chick's wanna fuck it... which is all the time. She puts up with a little playful rubbing and stuff like that, but no fucking. I play along... even though I throw it around a lot behind her back. She doesn't need to know that though. That's why I keep my own apartment. Max really wants me to move in, but I keep my own place so I can have my fun without getting yelled at... or having a frying pan thrown at me. It's happened twice. Max's temper gets the best of her from time to time. We love each other though, so we work past it.

"C'mon, Max. Pretty pleaseeeeeeee. Can't we just play with it a little??" Sofia gives Max a real pouty, begging look, smokey and all. Damn, she's beautiful. Spence is a lucky guy. How the fuck did that goofy dork get her anyway?

I kiss Max's right cheek, nibbling on her neck too, happily groping away on those perfectly phat, all natural 34DDs. My extra horny hands are under her shirt, squeezing, cupping, and fondling away freely. No bra to be seen... or felt.

"Oh well. Since you said pretty please. BUT... you can only suck it. I'm the only bitch that gets to fuck it." Max mischievously wiggles her eyebrows, then licks my lips.

About five seconds later, Sofia and Penny are both on their knees in front of the sofa, happily blowing me. They trade off my cock, spitting on it and sucking on it wildly and mercilessly as I smoke and watch. Those are two cock hungry bitches if there ever were any. Damn! Penny slurps my dick so damn good, I almost blow my wad down her throat. How the fuck did that nerd boyfriend of hers get this hot slutty bitch.

Sofia one ups Penny though, deepthroating my entire cock. My ass comes up off the damn sofa as she licks my balls, fourteen inches of white dick wedged down her throat. Fucking sexy Columbian bitch.

Max almost fell in the floor. She's still sitting in my lap, smoking away, feeding Penny and Sofia my giant dick between her legs. My hands never leave those awesome tits though. Under her shirt. God... Max has amazing tits. The most squeezable funbags I've ever squeezed. She laughs at me, then playfully bites my lower lip for almost tossing her off of my lap when I jumped up.

Sofia finally gets the super creamy reward. Max pumps my cum spewing dick nice and fast between her legs as Sofia slutty smiles around my cock while she gulps down my entire load of super dick, super cream. Penny sucks beautifully on my balls as Sofia drains me, both bitches making me feel so damn good at the same time.

"Suck it all down, bitch. Suck my man's seed down, you slutty bitch." Max commands, jerking my cock so fucking fast, smoke pouring from her mouth. Sofia very gladly obeys, totally draining me dry. That very naughty tongue and those gorgeous, succulent lips dirty dancing all across my cumming super cock like a true pro would.

Max and I kiss, sharing some smoke as we do. Penny sucks my cock after Sofia lets it fall from her very happy mouth. Sofia takes over sucking my nuts while Penny gets my piss.

Ahhhhhhhh... I let loose into her mouth. Penny enthusiastically drinks my warm, tangy dick liquor with pure moaning delight. I piss for what seems like forever... and Penny very happily drinks it all down. I softly rub her face while Max and I kiss. Penny appreciatively rubs her face on my hand as she sucks down my warm piss, moaning happily the entire time.

"Gotta keep my man happy."

"You do, baby. You do." Max and I share a naughty, smokey smirk, then kiss again, tongue molesting each other so deep and dirty.

I love Max. I fuck other chicks... behind her back... but I still love her. Plus... she let's me play around a little with other chicks as well. And God... Penny and Sofia play so nice too. Haha.

Sofia orders some Chinese food for all of us afterwards, and we smoke and eat our horny hearts out.

The next day at The East Hollywood Diner...

"FUCK! Another bad tipper. I'm gonna start pissing in their Dr Pepper from now on." Max is upset. She's also smokin' hot in that tight and skimpy yellow with red trim waitress uniform. It goes just below her super curvy ass and is unzipped half way down her 34DDs. They're almost pouring outta that damn thing. Her black push up bra certainly helps with that too. Penny's is the same. Her perky 32Cs aren't as big as Max's DDs, but they're certainly eye popping too.

"Don't get too upset, Max. Things will pick up... hopefully." Penny says that last part to herself as she walks over to clean the table that Max's cheap customer just left.

"OK, everyone. Listen up." Ellsworth, who's the manager, waves everyone over to him. "Great news, guys..."

"You're giving up sweater vests?" Max teases, not in the mood for a speech from Ellsworth.

"No..." He looks around, befuddled. "No, I'm not. The owners have told me that we're staying open til midnight now." Ellsworth grins, expecting everyone to go along with his excitement at the news.

"What the hell?" Serena, the black cashier chimes in. "You want us to work another hour? How the hell is that great news?" She shakes her head and walks off, waving off Ellsworth.

"Yeah... that's what we all need... more fucking work." Max shakes her own head, belching as she folds her arms, standing all grumpy at the counter.

"Another hour means another hour of pay. So, more money for everyone." Ellsworth keeps grinning, pumping his fists to hopefully drum up some excitement from the crew.

"... And more cheap ass customers." Max flips off Ellsworth, then walks back into the kitchen, all frustrated. He's taken aback by her grumpiness. Ellsworth's got the goofiest ass surprised look on his always goofy looking face. Dude has a special knack for looking goofy. He's the best ever at it. Spence gives him a run for his money though.

"C'mon, guys. This is gonna be great for everyone. OK? I wouldn't let you down." Ellsworth's ridiculously goofy smile doesn't get over too well with the frustrated staff. They all walk off and ignore him.

"So... How's things with you, Kelly?" Penny asks the eye poppingly gorgeous bartender.

"Things are ok. I've got some money saved up and I've got a couple of side deals going, so I'm doing OK. How about you, doll?" Kelly wipes down the bar. Penny takes a seat... and a deep breath.

"Not too good at all. Max and I are broke. Just 2 Broke Bitches."

"Is it really that bad? What happened? I thought you guys had your cupcake business going. What happened?"

"We fucked up, I guess. Not enough horny dudes out there that wanna buy cupcakes from a couple of slutty, desperate broads. I mean, we showed off our tits and ass and everything. Buy a cupcake... cop a feel. Great marketing ploy I thought. But no! And my stupid acting lessons were a waste too. All I got to show from them is two blowjobs I had to give just to get an audition... FOR THE SAME COMMERCIAL! AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET IT! DAMN!" Penny shakes her head in her hands, sobbing, all depressed again.

Kelly pours her a drink and rubs her face. "It's gonna be OK, doll. I promise." She smiles a very comforting smile. Penny chugs the drink.

"You sound just like James."

"Where is that handsome stud, anyway?" Kelly asks, still smiling, rubbing Penny's hand to comfort her even more.

"Umm... I think he's hanging with a friend. But don't tell Max."

"I won't. Another female friend, huh? He fucked me yesterday afternoon. I was hoping I could see him again tonight, but I guess we're working late now."

"GODDDD.... More work." Penny lays her head on the bar, all down and frustrated. Kelly rubs her back. She smiles when she gets my text.

"The stud himself." Kelly looks over my text.

Penny raises her head, still sobbing. She collects herself so she can get back to work.

"My night's made. James is coming over and he wants to see me. Now... can I just get someone to cover the bar for me? Hmmmm..." Kelly looks around.

"I'll do it. I'll pull double duty. Besides... it's not like this place is packed anyway." Penny looks around. There's only one customer in a booth. He's been sitting there for awhile, reading a book.

"You sure you can handle it?"

"Yeah. Don't worry. I'll be fine."

"Ok, doll. Thanks a lot. I can't wait to see James. He said he'll be here a little later so I'll get as much done as I can before he gets here.

"Don't let Max see you with him."

"I'm gonna sneak out when he gets here. We can fuck in his van. I love that van. Hehe." Kelly grins all naughty and turned on. I do have a pretty bitchin' van. All retro and pimped out.

"Me too. God... he fucked me last week in the back of it. My ass was sore for three days afterwards. Between his huge cock and the huge dildo in my ass at the same time. God... it was freaking amazing. A little painful, but still freaking amazing." Penny finally smiles.

Over in the kitchen...

"How you feeling, Max?" Spence tries to be nice, but Max isn't in the mood for it.

"HOW AM I FEELING??? HOW AM I FEELING???" Max pokes Spence in the chest, an angry snarl on her still awesomely gorgeous face. Spence gets a little nervous at my girl's intenseness though. "WELL... I'M BROKE! ALL WE HAVE HERE IS CHEAP ASS CUSTOMERS! I'VE NOW GOTTA WORK AN EXTRA HOUR FOR NOTHING! AND... I'M FUCKING BROKE!!! THAT'S HOW I'M FUCKING FEELING!!!" Max pokes Spence in the chest again and storms off.

Spence looks around, caught off guard by my girl's anger, and rubs his sore chest. Max's pokes are pretty darn hard... especially when she's angry.

Max walks out back of the diner and sits on the sidewalk. She lights up and smokes, trying to chill before she goes all postal up in the diner.

"Fucking stupid life. What happened? I mean... I've got these tits..." Max pushes up her amazing breasts, looking them over and nodding. She keeps smoking, and watching traffic go by.

She gets a message. It's from a customer that she met before. Dude said he was a photographer. He offered to take some nudes of her and make her some good money. He gave Max his business card. Max gave him her number, but forgot about him after she thought about it. She didn't think he was for real. Just another scammer in LA trying to fuck her.

"Yeah... old perv. Yeah... you'll make me BIG BUCKS. Sure." Max looks away from her phone, still not believing the guy. She smokes, blowing big smoke rings up towards the night sky.

Max gets another text from the same old dude. "I'm not joking, Max. I promise. I used to work for Penthouse, now I'm freelancing. Give me a call. I promise I can make you really good money... Dale."

Max thinks about it, smoking while trying not to get too pissed off at all the honking horns on the street. Hollywood is noisy as all hell at night. She gets up and brushes herself off, finishes her joint, then heads back into the diner, still not knowing what she'll do about Dale the photographer.

"Ayeeee, Spenceyyy." Sofia sits at the counter, greeting her boyfriend in the kitchen.

"Heyyyy, baby. How's my girl?"

"I'm great, papi. When's your break? I need some sausage. Hehehe." Sofia smirks all naughty at the super horny cook.

Spence waves her back to the kitchen. Sofia jumps up and strolls so sexy back there, smiling bright and super happy. They start kissing very passionately, Sofia's legs wrapped around Spence. He carries her back into the walk in fridge as they wildly swap spit.

While Spence and Sofia get freaky in the fridge, Penny takes care of a new customer.

"So... how much, baby?" The pervy dude asks with a cocky grin.

"How much what?"

"How much to see 'em" The dude points at Penny's gorgeous tits. Her cleavage is very enticing... and very visible. Much like her almost always rock hard nips. They're poking right though that yellow minidress top. Penny's braless. It's a work time specialty of hers.

"You wanna pay to see my tits?"

"Hell yeah. So... how much?"

"Fuck off, loser." Penny walks off in disgust.

"Whatever." The dude looks around for Max.

"That asshole wants to pay to see my tits. Fuck that." Penny tell herself, then stops herself abruptly. "Wait a minute. I need money. And some asshole wants to pay to see my tits. I could make some easy money here. Huh...." She debates the situation in her head for a moment. "Fuck it. I'll do it." Penny walks back over to the customer and gets down to business.

"Ok, buddy. $100 bucks." Penny gives him a real serious look.

"No way... $20." Dude tries to play it cool.

"You're fucking kidding me. I'm not showing you my tits for 20 bucks. Fuck that!... $75." Penny stands there, arms folded under her perky breasts, still real serious looking.

Dude thinks about it for a minute. "50 bucks is as high as I can go. C'mon, baby. You've got great tits, but 50 bucks is 50 bucks. Take it or leave it."

Penny holds back the urge to punch this jackoff in the face. She thinks about it......... "Ok. Money first though." Penny holds out her hand. The cocky dude snickers, then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a fifty. He hands it to Penny and waits.

Penny looks around, then slowly unzips her top. Those very beautiful, very perky breasts slowly appear. The dude smirks nice and wide, eager to see them. Penny pulls her top off her tits and voila. They're right there in front of his eyes. Cone shaped, perky tits, so perfectly shaped. The nipples pink and rock hard. Jutting straight out so perfectly. The dude just nods, grinning all cocky. He likes 'em a lot. He starts to reach over and cop a feel, but Penny quickly slaps his hands away and zips up.

"You paid to see them... that's all." Penny walks off, counting her newly earned money.

"Finally a good tipper. It's about damn time." Max tells Penny at the counter when she sees the money.

"Not a tip."

"He just gave it to you?"

"Yeah... to see my tits." Penny winks at Max. They walk back into the kitchen.

"Ha! That's my girl. Use the goods to get some dough." Max high fives Penny. "I used to do that, but the lame ass cheap wads started infiltrating those customers too, so I stopped." Max explains.

"AYE PAPI!!!!!! FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"

Max and Penny look at each other, then at the cooler. They walk over to it and and listen in to Spence and Sofia going at it. They can hear boxes flying and thighs slapping against other body parts. Sofia keeps screaming and Spence keeps grunting and groaning.

"Damn... little perv can rock a pussy I guess." Max says with a horny smirk, her head up against the cooler door.

"Sounds like it." Penny agrees. She listens in closely too.

About ten minutes later, Spence and Sofia walk out, kissing and fixing their clothes. "Gracias, papi. That was so GOOOOOOOODDDDDD! AYE!!!" Sofia pats Spence's goofy grinning face and walks off, waving at Penny and Max.