A Day at the Park

It's warm out and the cool breeze coming off of the lake is a welcome relief on my skin. Beneath the tall trees, we have found the perfect spot for a hammock. It's just big enough for the two of us. You lay beside me with your head on my chest. You have always said you love listening to my heartbeat and I am sure in this moment it is slow and steady. I hang one leg over the edge to move back and forth and keep the hammock swinging. We sway back and forth slowly.

I look down at you as your rest peacefully under the dancing shadows of the leaves above us. You look up with a mischievous smile. I know that smile. But here? Now? I look across the grassy park filled with families and children and the occasional jogger. We are on the edge, near the water and are somewhat out of view but certainly not private by any stretch of the imagination. But that look. I can never say no when you look at me like that.

I have become accustomed to wearing button up shirts. It's just easier to not have to plan ahead or change clothes. My bras have all become nursing bras as well. Just a few of the ways you have changed me. I move to face you with my back now to the people around us. You grin, knowing your request has been granted. You move your head back to watch. I undo the third button down and then the fourth. My shirt is at least still somewhat closed at the top and bottom in case of a sudden intruder. I reach in and lower the cup of my bra, exposing my breast.

My nipple immediately tightens at the rapid change in temperature. You lay your head on my chest once again but with much different intent this time. Your mouth feels so nice and warm on my nipple and after a moment or two, it relaxes and becomes soft in your mouth. Your arm drapes across me just above my waist and my arm lays across your shoulder. We have made a makeshift hideaway for you nurse in.

I am able to relax a bit more when I am sure that we are hidden well enough. Just a couple of people lounging in a hammock. Nothing to see here folks.

I divert my attention from our surroundings back onto the happy person attached to my breast. It's hard to smile and suckle at the same time, but I can tell from your expression that you'd still have that grin if not for my breast. I gently brush the stray hairs back away from your face as the light breeze occasionally picks up a strand and dances it across your forehead. Such a sweet happy face it is. As you suckle contentedly, I trace your features. Across your forehead, down your temples. Across each eye brow and down the bridge of your nose. I lightly caress your cheeks, your jaw, your busy chin.

I playfully pinch your chin as it works up and down to pull my milk into your mouth. You can't quite stifle a quiet giggle which inevitably breaks the seal you previous had on my breast. Milk dribbles down your cheek and onto the edge of my shirt. I realize my mistake and quickly draw a breath in as I reach down to move my nipple back for you to latch onto again. You eagerly resume your work but I can tell you are trying hard not to smile.

"Naughty boy," I whisper in a silly, sarcastic tone. You open your eyes and look up at me with eyebrows raised as if to say "Who? Me?"

"Yes you," I say as I place the end of my finger on your nose. You now raise a single eyebrow, never taking your mouth off of me.

"Hush. Back to work," I say smiling as I nudge you a bit by moving my chest closer. I love that we can have small conversations using only facial expressions. It is a skill built out of necessity but one I enjoy.

You breathe a big sigh and relax once again. My lower body is still able to stay lying flat enough to keep us swinging with one leg out. I fight the urge to close my eyes. One of us has to stand guard and it certainly isn't you, nuzzled to my breast and unaware of the world around us. Besides, when you are nursing, I always feel protective of you. Normally I am a laid back, rather passive person. Nursing suddenly bring on the rush of hormones that makes me feel like I could take on an army to keep you safe. It is a fierce love. So powerful and peaceful all at once.

You give one long and rather hard suckle, swallow once more and release me. We can both feel that one side is now empty.

"Scoot and roll the other way," I tell you. I stand up with arms crossed to hide my open shirt and walk around the tree to the opposite side of the hammock.

As I get comfortable, you reach up and undo the other cup on my bra.

"Where is your patience today?" I laugh. You ignore my teasing as you are already busy pulling at my nipple with your mouth tightly sealed. I can feel your tongue begin the familiar rhythm of encouraging the letdown of more milk.

Again we slowly swing back and forth, holding each other close. I relish these moments of intimacy, especially when done in secret like this. No a soul aware of the intimate act happening in this public place. In a way it makes it feel even more "ours". Privacy at home is one thing but out in the world it is a bit different.

My wandering thoughts are suddenly broken by the sound of a laughing child approaching. Her ball has rolled close to where we are and she runs over to retrieve it. Your back is to her and thankfully, her view is blocked. Startled, I can feel your jaw start to open to release me.

"No no, stay put. Don't move," I whisper. You freeze in place.

Happily focused on her own play, she smiles as we make eye contact. I give a small wave with the hand that is draped across your shoulders. She smiles, picks up her ball, and runs back to the play area far out of range. I feel you begin to breathe again. I hadn't realized until now that you'd been holding your breath. I run my fingers through your hair and across your back.

"You're ok. Don't worry. Go ahead sweetheart." You resume the steady draw at my breast. I take in a deep breath and let it out again. Without thinking, I start to rub your back as we sway. I love touching you. Being in physical contact even fully clothed brings me such peace and comfort.

It's not long before your belly is full and I am empty. You slyly reach up and reattach the cups of my bra and button my shirt. We rock together, cuddled close for a while longer. With our legs intertwined and arms around each other, the love radiates between us.

It is getting late in the afternoon and only one of us has had a snack since lunchtime. Time to head home. We pack up the hammock and you carry it for us as we walk back to the car. We pass the family of the little girl with the ball at their picnic table. I catch a glance from her mother who smiles sweetly at me as though we share some sort of secret.

"Time to go feed the baby?" she asks.

We both freeze. How did she...Does she...? Suddenly I look down. There is a distinct wet spot on my shirt over my breast where your giggle earlier left some milk.

I laugh and simply reply "Yep, sure is," while I give your hand a squeeze. You squeeze back and we walk back to the car trying not to laugh. She's certainly right. More than she realizes. I do indeed need to go feed the baby.

After he drives us home.