A Legal Trap Ch. 03

March 9th, 6:18 PM

We arrived late to the Carson's for dinner. I hated being late for anything and I never arrived at a set appointment any later than ten minutes before it started. Being late by nearly twenty minutes made me anxious, made me feel like any fidgeting I did was hyper-pronounced, spotlighted. This was going to be a long unpleasant evening if I didn't get a hold of my anxiety.

Paul didn't seem to care that we were late and that annoyed me beyond words. He had gotten pretty good at reading my mind, doing that twice today, why hadn't he picked up on how being late triggered stress for me? My repeated comments about the time and needing to get here while we were in my room researching leads were all but ignored. He so focused on our discoveries of Amber's activities online he obviously stopped listening to me and the ticking clock I kept reminding him of.

We left so many leads unexplored back at the hotel and probably should still be there still, not wasting time at dinner or whatever this was supposed to be. How was this break in the investigation going to help Amber? We were already behind the curve and time was our enemy. Time! We were late and I was stressed enough!

Upon entering the Carson's beautiful home, the obvious protocol was introductions of Jacob's assets helping out in the search for Amber. I was dreading this since learning we were coming here this evening. I watched Paul shake Jacob's hand, then Amber's dad's hand - Gary, then her mother - Stephanie. I went through the same greeting line, apologizing each time for being late. I am sure I came off as sounding nervous, maybe even a bit neurotic.

My apologies seemed to fall on deaf ears though and we were ushered without further ceremony to a large formal dining room. There were just five place settings, which meant their other two children would not be joining us. I wondered if the siblings knew about Amber's online presence. Would we get a chance to speak with them? How were they protecting them from Amber's disappearance? My heart sank thinking about their worry for their sister.

After sitting, drinks were offered and delivered quickly by what I assumed was a very polite butler / chef / nanny, possibly a live-in arrangement. I downed my glass of water within the first couple minutes of high-level discovery conversations Paul was having and wished I had asked for two glasses or a pitcher to be left. Everyone else was either drinking wine or beer at what appeared to be a relaxed pace.

The large table wasn't large enough to keep me from feeling self-conscious. I felt stiff and like every move I made looked like I was uncomfortable, which made me worried that I was attracting unnecessary attention to myself. Of course that wasn't the case as everyone was listening intently to Paul. I tried to focus on his relaying of details, organizing a loose time line, and had to give him credit because his delivery was sans anything graphic.

On our way over to the Carson's we had discussed Amber's activities online and how much we should let them know. We decided to not hold back, but keep the graphic nature of what we'd found as generic as possible. The Carson's already had an idea she was into some compromising activities, we didn't need to lay it all out there and make them feel worse.

It was a bit uncomfortable talking about this stuff, especially those things Paul considered 'dark' or 'disturbing'. Amber's webcam broadcasts from her room (Paul confirmed it was her room) were mostly of her using toys, masturbating, modeling chastity cages and a couple jeweled anal plugs, or simply trying on lingerie. She spoke to the audience in most of the clips, trying to balance her activities with reading messages sent to her. The frequent 'ding' of watchers paying her was disturbing.

She had been doing these 'shows' for almost six months now - which meant she was a minor still at the time. Legally, what she posted would be considered child pornography and sites would need to remove it once contacted or face stiff legal charges / fines. Trouble with enforcement was most of the sites were operated from countries that didn't give a crap.

Tracking all she had posted would be impossible and a full-time job Paul said. Sites sharing content, dark web, and FTP servers delivering content were just a few obstacles the Carson's would be up against. The media would live well past her lifetime.

The suggestive pictures she'd posted ran along the same lines as her video content. Most I would classify being more 'gray' than 'dark' as Paul wanted us to classify any content of hers that we found. I complained that any number of online retailers had woman's lingerie pictures that were no different from Amber's pictures - though their models weren't under aged. Did a label even matter at this point?

I tried to impress upon him that these pictures were 'teasers'. Her stuff was revealing and certainly compromising, but they were teasers for the purpose of generating interest, attention, and maybe even income. That begged the question 'Why?' She seemed to have everything she could ask for concerning her transition. A foundation of support I could only have dreamt of, but there was something missing and she sought out the ugly side of the internet to get something more in return. Was the purpose to make money, garner attention, or maybe validate the woman she was? Augh...

The looping Tumblr graphic image of her we both agreed was absolutely 'dark'. I was sure we'd find more of the same and possibly worse. I don't think Paul knew the depths of the hell Amber had submitted herself too or that it could be even darker. If there was an upside, then it was the Tumblr posting had been made this past Monday.

It was impossible to know when the graphic had been captured or who had posted it. We assumed Amber had posted it - which didn't make that any better in the scope of things. The hope was maybe she might still be out there and we could find her, help bring her home.

After Paul explained to the Carson's our most recent discoveries, he outlined

our summation of her activities online. Jacob then described some similar findings made by the police - minus of course the new accounts we had found.

Paul explained the Word document which had broken it all open for us and how it contained credentials to three different email accounts, an Amazon wish list, two porn sites (nothing we found yet contained anything she was featured in), and PayPal and Patreon accounts. He also mentioned it was my persistence that got us there. I could have done without the attention - I got a nod from Jacob and Gary, a blank stare from Stephanie trying to burn my skin

off with her stare.

There was though some hope, relief on behalf of the Carson's regarding the Tumblr post timing. If they knew what the post was it would certainly be relief smeared with horror. Questions flew quickly from Stephanie regarding Tumblr and I left them for Paul to answer.

He did that patiently, with real class, and compassion. I was impressed and grateful I wasn't on the spot for answering: Where is she? Did she look alright? And on and on the questions were thrown at him by Gary and Stephane.

It was heartbreaking to listen to and after a few minutes Jacob interjected, stopping the impossible to answer questions, turning the tide back to our investigation. He instructed Paul to keep this information close, meaning not to share it with the police, until we'd had a little more time to comb through it. He then described his meeting with the local FBI Director as productive and by early next week there would be resources made available for us to use.

There were a few things the Director was going to look into and get back to Jacob on. That got approving nods around the table - but it felt like the Carson's already knew everything Jacob was saying. I wanted to blurt out questions but held my tongue. I was feeling like I was on the outside looking in still. That would probably sound odd to these people - since I had been very much been Amber four years ago in regards to some 'dark' shit. I wasn't about to share that though.

Paul continued describing Amber's activities, going over browser history -

while having been deleted, he was able to pull a list of sites she visited

regardless. How? I wish I knew, because I'd like to destroy that kind of

information on my own personal computer and Android tablet, though on the tablet I was using an app to mask my browsing via a proxy server.

Paul then dove into the last two accounts we found and their significance - which was they were used to manage subscription content Amber was providing to people. We had plenty to comb through just in terms of the subscription content, subscribers, and he left it with we would be working around the clock to come up with solid answers. I hoped it was a figure of speech - I felt spent from a day that seemed twenty hours long already.

When he mentioned the amount of money in the accounts totaled nearly twelve-thousand dollars, both the Carson's gasped.

March 9th, 7:51 PM

Stephanie had excused herself from eating with us. Gary apologized after

she had left - it wasn't like we didn't get it. Conversation over dinner was limited to a few discoveries Paul went into further detail about, but mostly about the Mariner's upcoming season. Jacob was a season ticket holder and Gary must have followed them and whatever the Arizona team was - Diamondbacks?

I had picked at my plate the entire meal. Not that the food didn't smell amazing, I just didn't have an appetite. I forced myself to finish my salad and two more glasses of water, which prompted a request for a bathroom. It was a relief to get away from the table, but upon returning the vibe was very different. What had I missed?

The table had been cleared and dessert was being placed before everyone - some kind of pie. I would have to press Paul as to what I had missed. When I made no move to touch the dessert Gary asked if I wanted to see Amber's room. Paul had already been through the room, so there was no reason to duplicate efforts - but I felt obligated to agree since Jacob was there.

I had to give the appearance of participating, even though I knew this was going to be hard for me and maybe even the Carsons having me poke around.

I followed Gary to Amber's room, it was on the first floor, and at some point had probably been a large bonus room converted to being a bedroom. Gary wasn't cold, but he was a little standoffish, I couldn't put a finger on his attitude.

"Feel free to look around," he said walking to a large walk-in closet, opening the door and flipping the light on, staring into the closet. "The police and Paul have been through everything. If you could just put things back where you found them that would be," he turned to look at me closely, "My wife and I appreciate you helping us with..." He walked head down out the room without another word.

Augh, a lump was now solidly in my throat and making it hard to swallow. I felt tears welling and stood up straighter - can't go there Elizabeth! What do I know? What's in this room? What were you thinking Amber?

I looked around the room and everything you'd expect was there for a teenage girl's room. Pink pillows and a light green comforter on a double bed, stuffed animals, and a poster of a boy band and one of Bruno Mars. A clock radio - one I was already familiar with - in fact this corner of the room looked exactly like the picture from her tattoo selfie.

That meant, I turned to see a freestanding mirror behind me. I stood where she must have stood to take that picture - yup, I've seen this view before. A first floor room - it meant she could escape through the window. I pulled the curtain aside and looked out into the dark. Be a short skip around the side of the garage, driveway is right there, and she'd be in the street out front in less than twenty seconds.

Did the Carson's have a security system with cameras? Neighbors with cameras? I'm sure those things had been covered by the police canvassing the neighborhood. We would have been told about that if there was anything significant.

I walked to her desk, pulled the chair back, and sat down. There was a

mirror on the wall, makeup, brushes, a hairdryer, curling iron, everything

she would need to get ready daily. Wherever she was she would need all

this stuff, she had to replace it. Questions: Did she have a bank account?

Credit cards?

I looked behind me to her closet - it was packed with clothes, shoes, coats... She would need all this stuff also - what's the cost to be whole in regards to wardrobe? What about her prescriptions? Where they missing?

I got up and wandered into her closet, thumbing through various blouses,

skirts, dresses - I was jealous, envious. I had less than a third the outfits she had! She had at least forty pairs of shoes - heels, flats, Ugg boots in three colors, riding boots, cowgirl boots - I was beginning to fume. Seriously! Three pairs of Ugg's! Focus!

There was a chest-of-drawers in the closet and I pulled out the top drawer, socks. I felt around, nothing. Second drawer, lingerie - there was expensive

shit mixed in with Victoria Secrets stuff. What was striking - there wasn't just say ten, fifteen pairs of panties - no, there were over thirty. Amazon wish list stuff? Fans sending her things? Did she sell these after wearing them? Did stuff get delivered here - if she ordered stuff?

The last couple of drawers - leggings, stretch pants, sweats, PJ's, three garter belts, hose, and four bustiers. I shook my head - what the fuck! This kid had ever opportunity given to her on a silver fucking platter and she walks out on it? What the hell am I missing here?

I sensed movement behind me and spun around startled, "Oh, Mrs. Carson, I was just looking to, I mean to see if I could," I was struggling to speak.

"We removed some of the items you might be looking for," she replied at just above a whisper.

"Ah, no... That really isn't what I was, no..." I looked to my right and flipped the light switch off, exited the closet and shut the door. Oh my God! Awkward! I wasn't trying to find dildos or vibrators. They had removed them? That meant the police, maybe even Paul hadn't seen them. I didn't need to see that shit, but I knew they existed.

"Jacob told us that you are Trans," she was still speaking at just above a whisper and with the thumping of my heart in my ears it was hard to hear her, "Why?"

Oh God! Why? Why what? Why was I Trans? Why did Amber leave? Why

had she done some of the things she had? What the hell was I supposed to

say? "I think I'm as baffled as you Mrs. Carson. By all appearances, Amber had everything and, I mean I just don't get it, not yet in the least." I tried to sound hopeful, but could sense my voice didn't match my intended goal.

"Jacob said you've had similar experiences?"

OK, what the fuck! I tried to control my emotions but could feel my face

flushing. I was going to kill Paul! Had my past been disclosed to Jacob?! I tried to regain my composure, breathing slowly, focus, focus!

The best interview technique I have found is to reverse the rolls - be interviewed, but be the question asker, not the on answering the questions, "I've had some rough times," I wasn't going to expand on that and tried to move the conversation elsewhere, "Is there any reason you can think of that would make Amber just disappear?"

"No, she was happy. School was good, she got excellent grades."

"Did she have many friends?"

"No, but it didn't seem to bother her. We talked plenty of times about it, about becoming involved with support groups." She turned and pulled the desk chair out and sat, "Her therapist was happy with her progress. Amber was right in line with where she thought she should be."

I had so many questions I wanted to ask, but had to rein in my need to

blurt them out in a verbal stream of diarrhea, "When did she start hormones,

I mean HRT? Were there any complications?"

"Just after her sixteenth birthday. We were told the dosing would be moderate at first, but she did so well that gate was crossed after the second month. Dosing was increased to standard amounts with no adverse effects. The testosterone blockers were probably tough at first, but she was fine with the dosing after a month." She sat back in the chair, crossing her legs casually. "When did you start?"

No, no, no... I'm asking the questions, "A year and a half ago. So, no

close friends? No one knew what she was doing? I mean in regards to

her internet presence..."

"No. Gary and I had no idea. I... I blame myself, I doted over her," she fell silent for a moment. "I loved all my sons equally, but I especially loved her as my daughter."

Question answered - Amber was one of three boys. "I think most parents

would give their all to making their children's lives all they want Mrs. Carson. I'm sure no one blames..." Shit, that wasn't what I wanted to say! I tried to recover quickly, "Thinks you or Mr. Carson brought this about." Fuck! I just stepped in it!

"Thank you. We just want her home. We will be there for her, to help her through all of this."

"I'm sure she knows you both are there for her."

"I just need to understand this, what she's going through, how I can fix it," she huffed the last couple words as if she had been defeated, "How did you make it through all this, this hell?"

Oh shit! No, we're not talking about me. I'm not talking about my journey through this crap! I tried to think of a way around talking about myself, "To be honest Mrs. Carson, I, I just did. I made some poor choices, but learned that those choices weren't getting me to the real me. It was hard and I didn't have the support of a loving family. My mom, she did what she could without screwing up the orbit she was in with my dad, but in the end I had to hit rock bottom before I could stand on my own."

And I stopped talking as if the off button on my brain had been clicked. It was more than I had expected to put out there with this woman I barely knew. I was surprised how effortlessly that flowed out of my mouth. The silence dragged on longer than I was comfortable and said, "Paul mentioned she got a tattoo, is there anything else she wanted that maybe you and Mr. Carson were opposed too?"

Amber had nearly twelve-thousand dollars in ill-gotten subscription money,

there was no way she wasn't spending it on stuff or saving up for something.

Stephanie seemed to be measuring her answer, "She wanted gauges for her ears. We said no, but offered the compromise of the nose and belly button piercings. Amber is very self-conscious about her appearance, not being or looking female enough. She accessorized to heighten her feminine appearance. Glasses, jewelry, you know..."

Are you fucking kidding me?! Seriously, put her and me in a line-up and

ask people to pick the freak out and every time they would pick me. Give

me a break! I shrugged, "I sense she gets a lot of encouragement from you Mrs. Carson, was it the same from Mr. Carson, her brothers?"

She looked to be thinking again about how to answer that, "Her brothers

teased her certainly at first. It was mean spirited stuff, but we nipped that in the bud pretty quick. They've come to accept her choice. Amber is the oldest; Chase and Donald are fifteen and almost thirteen respectively. She used to beat their asses, but that's changed. She puts up with their rough edges now, but I don't sense there's much conflict or strain amongst them. I don't know if Gary will ever fully understand Amber's need to be her, but he has supported every want and need she's come to us with. Secretly I think he likes having a daughter, but you would have to ask him... There are a lot more resources these days to help families, so we've been lucky I think."