A Mad Tea Party

A moment of silence passed as they all took in the situation, five of them in a small hotel room, James topless in a well-filled-out bra. "Well, mate," Abi proclaimed, "I think we can safely say... welcome to girls' night."

Chapter 5

Feeling a little self-conscious, James picked up his t-shirt and put it back on. It was quite baggy and accommodated his new breasts adequately, although they were still very much visible and formed two sizeable, round bulges, with the fabric of the t-shirt hanging loosely below.

As he pulled the shirt down over his bra, Abi reached into a bag. James was a little nervous to see what she was going to pull out, but to his relief, it was a portable speaker. James and Abi shared a similar taste in music, so he could at least count on a solid pre-party soundtrack if she was in control of the music. This made it quite surprising when the speaker played the opening 80s synth bars of a Cyndi Lauper hit.

"Really, Abs?" questioned James, taken aback.

"Aw, c'mon J. I know it's cheesy, but it's girls' night; it's sort of tradition, I guess. It'll get you in the mood!"

James doubted that, but declined to press further, not wanting to intrude on a ritual. Besides, he sensed he was likely to be outvoted in any case. Abi moved on swiftly to the business of getting everyone through makeup, hair, and costumes. James now really felt like he was backstage at a theatre, even with the makeshift budget hotel dressing room. A complex process was about to get underway, but Abi directed expertly. First off was Lucy to do Steph's hair while the others applied moisturiser and primer, ready for Steph to do their makeup once her own hair was done. Steph and Lucy made their way quickly into the bathroom together.

Abi addressed James as she squeezed some cream out of a bottle onto her fingers: "We'll do you last, James — maybe you'll be a bit less self-conscious if us lot are dressed up like idiots."

"Thanks. Plus, less time for me to mess it up, right?" James was starting to understand the process.

"Well, maybe that too," Abi admitted.

After ten minutes or so, the pair emerged from the bathroom. Steph's neon pink hair now had strips of foil running down from her scalp, clipped in place with small plastic clips.

"That should be nice and dry soon," chirped Lucy. Steph and Lucy then each proceeded in the direction of a chair, Steph to the one with the portable ring light, and began work. Jas was first in Steph's makeup chair and was done within fifteen minutes or so, ending with a fairly subtle look but with heavy eye liner. Meanwhile, Lucy was putting Abi's striking red hair up into a large bun. James was left perching on the end of the bed, alternating between watching the experts at work and getting used to the new weight on his chest.

Once they were both finished, Jas and Abi switched chairs, and Steph began working on Abi's face. Before long, her face was a ghostly shade of white, punctured by shocking red lips in a small, round pucker. Her nails were a matching cherry red. For the final touch, Steph delicately drew a beauty spot above her left cheek. Jas's hair was almost as simple as her makeup was. With a little arranging with the comb and some hair wax, the longest part was the addition of a fake ponytail, finished off with a white ribbon.

With Jas's hair done, it was now James' turn. Lucy called him over.

"So... what's the plan here?" asked James, realising that his short crop of blonde hair was probably not very much to work with.

"Well, fortunately, Becky wanted longer hair for this anyway, so..." answered Lucy as she reached into a bag in one of the neat piles on the floor. After a little rummaging, she produced a clear, flat pouch containing a mass of light blonde. She carefully removed the contents and unfurled wavy, light golden locks. Holding the wig at eye level, the hair kept on unfolding and falling lower and lower. It had reached past her waist by the time it stopped. James realised that, in all his hesitations about putting the dress on, he had completely neglected what the rest of the costume might entail.

"That's... for me?" He wasn't really sure why he asked: he already knew the answer.

"Pretty, isn't it?" Lucy responded.

James looked apprehensive. "I thought Alice had shorter hair than that?" he questioned.

"Sure," Lucy answered, "but we want a bit of a twist, right? Trust me, this is going to look awesome!"

Before James could protest any further, Lucy continued, "Maybe you'd better take your t-shirt off again, though, before we put it on." It was a little weird, although after a moment's thought, James concluded she probably had a point: he didn't need the challenge of trying to get the t-shirt over the wig without ruining it on top of everything else today. He pulled the t-shirt over his head to reveal his bra, as Lucy grabbed a clean, white hotel towel and handed it to him.

As James secured the towel around himself to cover his breasts, Lucy carefully laid the wig out on the desk, picked up a thin nylon cap, and placed it over James' head, tucking his hair underneath. It didn't take long. With expert care, she picked up the wig again and began laying it over his head, sliding small combs under the cap and into his hair to hold it in place. She put some plastic clips in to hold the hair back and then began applying something from a bottle to the front and sides of his head. It smelled fresh and citrusy. She pressed the wig against his head where she'd applied the paste, holding it for a few seconds. Once this was done, she started on his forehead with a comb and a different bottle of something. James couldn't see in a mirror, although even he had been able to, he suspected he still would not understand what Lucy was now doing.

"Just tidying up the hairline here," explained Lucy. "If we blend it in a bit, it will look more natural." James decided to just try to keep his head as still as possible. This went on for what seemed like a very long time, but eventually Lucy removed the clips holding the hair back. As locks of hair fell over his face, Lucy skipped over to the other side of the room and returned with a roll of black ribbon. She gathered the hair back up, then measured out a length of the ribbon, cut it, and tied the hair back with a fairly large bow on top of his head. She was still not finished. There were several minutes of arranging the hair at the front before she picked up a pair of hair straighteners and started working on the longer parts of the hair, clamping with the straighteners and brushing.

In the time Lucy was working, Jas had taken first turn in the bathroom to get changed. She reappeared just as Lucy was styling, and Lucy paused to look, so James could also turn his head without fear of getting a comb in the eye. Jas was transformed. She stood in bold, black and blue chequered trousers — fitted, but not tight — with a rich, dark green waistcoat emblazoned with large gold buttons. On top was an emerald green suit jacket, nipped in and buttoned at the waist. An enormous frill burst at the collar and cuffs from a white shirt underneath, finished with a comically oversized, bright gold bow tie. The hat was clearly yet to come, as James could fairly easily tell that she was the Mad Hatter. Squeals erupted from the three girls.

"Jas, you look amazing!" squeaked Lucy.

"Hang on, why couldn't I have just worn that and Jas be Alice?" asked James, pointedly. He couldn't help noticing that, although Jas still looked distinctly feminine, her costume was just trousers, a shirt, and a jacket rather than a dress.

"'Cos you wouldn't have fitted into it, mate," answered Abi, assuredly. James had to admit she was right — the clothes were perfectly fitted to Jas's slight, delicate form.

Jas sat on the bed and took a break. Abi's makeup was now finished, so she took next turn in the bathroom. Lucy continued styling, crimping, and brushing and, after a few more minutes, stepped back to evaluate her handiwork.

"There we go, all done!" she chimed.

Steph turned to look and approved, "That looks awesome, Luce!" James got up and went to the mirror to see for himself. The locks of hair gently bobbed with his movement. He looked in the mirror and blinked. He did indeed have long, wavy blonde hair. The fringe was neatly arranged in a mid-parting at the front, covering the sides of his forehead before sweeping back and under the ribbon. More light blonde waves flowed neatly down either side in front of his shoulders, all the way to his belly button. It looked uncannily natural.

Lucy turned to Steph. "Over to you then!" she exclaimed, and set about working on her own hair. Steph, having finished Abi's, was taking advantage of the break to remove the foil from her hair. James had been facing the wrong way in Lucy's chair, but he now saw that where the foil had been, the hair was a bold, vibrant purple. She removed the last of the foil and gave her hair a quick shake. It was now alternating vertical stripes of bubblegum pink and lurid purple. Without comment, she ushered James into the chair in front of her.

She started by gently clipping his hair back once more, then covered James' face and neck with another white cream. Once that was done, she took a sponge and dabbed a few skin-coloured blobs onto her own hand, holding it up against James' face. Deciding on one, she squeezed more of the cream out onto the sponge and started expertly applying it to his face. The damp sponge felt cold against his skin. After this came another tube of "product," as she referred to it, and a lot of brushing.

Trying not to focus on what Steph was doing, James heard the bathroom door open. Steph paused her brushing and looked, as did James. Abi was changed into the same beautiful red velvet dress and high collar he'd seen her in this morning, although now with the makeup too, she looked even less recognisable. She had not put on the crown yet, but was now wearing long, red velvet opera gloves and a pair of shiny, pillar-box red, heeled boots that closely hugged her legs all the way up to her thighs. When she moved, James caught sight of the lace top of what must have been a pair of stockings rising just above the top of the boots.

Jas leapt up from the bed and put her hand on Abi's arms, avoiding the sleeves of the dress. "That looks so good!" squeaked Jas.

"You look amaaaaaaazing!" squealed Lucy.

Abi took a moment to pose. "Thanks!" she said, as she sat down on the side of the bed along with Jas. Steph turned back to James and continued her work.

Once she was done with the brushes, she picked up a pencil.

"Now I'd cover up and redraw your brows, but you'll have the mask, so I can just leave them if you want." explained Steph.

James replied that that was fine, although Steph still seemed to be doing something with the pencil on his eyebrows. Next was by far the least pleasant part and involved Steph poking around his eyes. He tried to keep his eyes shut as much as possible and focus on Abi's soundtrack, which had now moved on to some classic disco. It was at least four or five songs before Steph finally moved on to his lips and he could open his eyes again. The lipstick appeared to be a pale pink, and then there was another stick that tasted sweet like cherryade.

Finally, Steph was finished.

"Fuck yeah." she exclaimed. James turned to the others, and Abi did a double-take.

"No way!" blurted Abi.

"Wow." added Jas. James headed over to the mirror. The face that looked back had perfect, delicate complexion. His lips were indeed a blush pink colour but also a little glossier and plumper looking. The most remarkable thing was his eyes, which looked about twice the size they normally were, with long, full lashes fluttering as he blinked. Even his eyebrows were tidier and more well-defined. It was still him, but a very different version.

"Your brow line is still a bit harsh, but like I say, you won't see that behind the mask anyway," Steph added.

"How did you..." James stuttered, as he went to touch one of his eyelashes.

"They're just false lashes," Steph answered, as if it were obvious. That did explain a lot of the prodding Steph did around his eyes.

James continued his questioning, "And they're easy to take off?"

"Yeah, it's fine; I can do it for you afterwards," Steph reassured him.

With Steph now done with James, Lucy applied a few finishing spritzes of hairspray to her own hair and took his place.

"Come here, I'll do your nails." Abi commanded. The seat Lucy was using as her hairdressing chair was now free, so she directed James to sit in it.

"This is normally Becky's department," explained Abi as she reached over and selected a bottle of nail varnish from the table. "We have all her kit too, since she couldn't take it on her trip." The colour she selected was a light but bold blue, matching the dress. Painting it on took hardly any time at all. He imagined he was going to have to wait for it to dry, but Abi directed him to place his hand in a small device on the desk with an ultraviolet light. With one hand under the light, Abi worked on the other. The whole thing must only have taken five or six minutes, after which James looked down at his shiny, baby blue nails.

"Well, I guess that means it's your turn to get changed," said Abi, reaching into a bag in another of the neat piles and handing him a small cardboard packet of tights. "Put those on first, and probably the shoes: it'll be easier that way". He didn't really understand why, but it must have been the same reason Abi already had her boots on. She also handed him the hanger with the dress he had tried earlier.

"I can help you get zipped up again," she added.

"Oh!" Jas suddenly interjected, rising from the bed and rummaging in her handbag.

"I don't know what... erm... underwear you're wearing, but boxer shorts would look a bit weird, so I picked these up." Jas explained, slightly embarrassed, as she handed James a plastic pack containing three neat rolls of what were labelled, "hipster briefs".

"These ones should have plenty of room at the front for... you know..." Jas looked more embarrassed, but Abi interrupted.

"Nice, and now you've got a clean pair for tomorrow too!" James couldn't tell if Abi was joking or not.

He collected the things he'd been handed, re-entered the bathroom, and clicked the lock. He slipped off the towel covering his bra and, for the second time, removed his jeans. He was indeed wearing boxers. Slipping them off, he inspected the underwear that Jas had handed him. The three-pack had a choice of pink, green, or white. He thought neutral white was probably the safest, and in any case, it was at the top. He unrolled them to reveal the thin fabric and its subtle lace detailing at the waist. Slipping his legs through the holes, he saw that Jas was true to her word, and they fit everything in comfortably.

Next, he opened the pack of tights and unwound the bright white nylon from the cardboard. He copied the motions as he'd seen them before, rolling the leg up and putting his foot in the end, then pulling them up his legs carefully, not wanting to damage them. With some tugging to pull them up around his waist, they were on: opaque, brilliant white. Jas was correct again: there was no need to worry about leg hair; under the thick tights, shaving would have made no difference at all. The line of the briefs was visible, and he agreed that boxer shorts underneath would have looked very peculiar. As instructed, he now slipped his feet into the shoes and tied the laces in a bow.

That just left the dress itself. He would have assumed he would leave the bra on, but Abi had assured him it wasn't necessary, so he fiddled with the clasp at the back and finally unclipped it, discarding it on the floor. The breast forms sat on his chest, now wobbling gently but still stuck securely in place. He unzipped the dress and removed it from the hanger, as before. Stepping into the dress, he took extra care not to catch the heel of the shoes on the fabric. As before, he threaded his arms through the sleeves and pulled the zip up as far as he could, then unlocked the door and called Abi. She once again cinched the dress with her hand, this time also moving locks of hair aside, and slid the zip all the way up to his neck. The breast forms nestled into the top of the dress, pushed upwards by the tight fabric hugging his middle.

"Just a sec," said Abi as she left the room again, returning with her hands full once more. In one hand was another hanger with white cotton fabric hanging from it. She removed the garment, placed it over his head, then took two long pieces and tied them in a large bow at the back of his waist. He saw that it was an apron of sorts as she smoothed it out over the blue skirt of the dress and tucked the straps under the collar. It covered most of the front of the dress, running from his chest and stopping a couple of inches before the bottom of the skirt. The straps were ruffled and ran down the back, meeting the waist strap.

"Almost there," soothed Abi as she picked up the other item she'd brought in with her: a large bundle of thin, white tulle-like netting, which ballooned out in size as she unfolded it.

"Here, put that on, and you're done." she instructed, holding the skirt by the elastic as she handed it to him. He took it, and again, taking care not to catch it with the shoes, he placed his feet through it. Somewhat guessing, he pulled the elastic up to his waist, nestling it under the dress. Abi began adjusting it and smoothing the dress out so it sat evenly, with the white skirt just visible underneath. With these touches, the dress now looked quite radically different. With the pinafore (not apron, as Abi corrected), the dress took on a completely different character and was now cutesy and childlike. The petticoat (as Abi also informed him) meant that the skirt, rather than being anywhere near his knees, now stuck out at a forty five degree angle and sat roughly level with the bottom of his thighs. It was only very slightly longer than Abi's. In combination with the heels, it made his legs look significantly longer, graceful, and slender.

Abi strutted out of the bathroom, clearly still enjoying her own outfit, and struck a pose, gesturing towards James. As he stepped back into the hotel room, the found the remaining three girls watching him re-enter. Lucy clasped her hands over her mouth and squealed; Steph's jaw dropped, and Jas immediately doubled over.

"That's fucking awesome." remarked Steph as she regained her composure. Lucy gushed, "You look amaaaaaazing!" and Jas, taking a little longer to gather herself, simply exclaimed, "Wow."

"Well, give us a twirl," prompted Abi, making a rotating motion with her index finger. James got the idea and span around once. The skirt billowed out beneath him, and the long hair did similarly, bobbing gently as it came to rest again perfectly in place. The girls clapped and cheered.

When he very hesitantly agreed to do it, he was fully imagining that the results would be okay at best: the group would at least have an Alice, but probably a rather odd and clumsy-looking one. Now, though, he had to agree. Of course the girls would be kind and say he looked great even if he didn't, but their reactions when he stepped out couldn't be faked. He'd seen himself in the mirror, and they really had done a great job. More than that, though, he felt something else he'd never felt before. He was struggling to even put his finger on what it was. He'd worn nice, formal suits plenty of times before, with the shop finding trousers, a shirt, and a jacket in his size with a silk tie and shiny, polished shoes — this wasn't like that though. The suits made him feel... sometimes smart, and sometimes just a little ridiculous. This, on the face of it, was far more ridiculous than any suit he'd ever worn — even the ones with a bow tie — and yet he felt entirely different.