A Merry Christmas in my Ass

"I think I'm starting to understand."

"I'm like a premature ejaculator of anal sex. Sometimes just daydreaming about it can make me cum. It's a lot of fun in my marriage, but I just signed for my first anal scene. And I need you to teach me how to control my ass. So do you think you can do that?"

"Madam, last year I coached 207 premature ejaculators with a 98% positive outcome; I gave classes to 1438 women who by springtime were already able to orgasm after a life of trying; I gave crash courses in prostate play to 74 men who mastered the bliss in a matter of days, DAYS! Know, Madam, that I cured the Great Sheik of Samarah while I was still a student; I solved the mystery of the red horses of Whilemsburg before the civil war broke down; Manuel Ferrara, the ghost of Hugh Hefner and Miley Cyrus all follow me on Twitter, so Madam: on my reputation, on my honor! I will make your anus the marathonian of your trade, the "hole" in Hollywood, the maestro of all tricks—magic tricks, that is. We have three months and in three months, together we will walk these boulevards in glorious triumph!"

"Ok, cool."

"Now, if you please, I would like to see the full scope of your situation."

The lights in the office dimmed and a spotlight switched on above a massage table. Lacey turned her phone off and prepared for her first session.

"Do you mind if I film it?" Hudson asked, "It's for my class at UCLA and also you and I we'll have to study the tapes if we wanna make progress."

"Sure," Lacey mumbled, her clothes now reduced to only her sports bra and a tie in her hair.

She climbed up onto the massage table and, on all fours, she had to choose a dildo from the case her coach was presenting to her. They varied in size, girth, color and shape but were all graduated.

"I'll go with 7" today," she said.

"How big is your husband?"

"That's a very personal question."

"Nevermind then."

The doctor put latex gloves on and lubed up the medical device. Lacey spread her cheeks and her anus opened slightly, used to such procedure.

"Like that, Doctor?"

"Please, call me Edgar. All right, patient is Mrs. Lacey Chabert, 36. The case is hypersensitivity to rectal stimulation. Proceeding with initial test penetration."

And very professionally, Edgar placed the tip of the dildo on Lacey's hole.

"Oh God," she shivered under her breath.

He pushed in and her anus welcomed the smooth texture with ease and anticipation. Its rim unpuckered as the rod was gently sliding in, but suddenly, a little before four inches, the doctor felt a clamping motion. Rhythmic. Fleshy. Lacey's vagina turned crimson. She was exhaling discreetly into the face cradle.

"Quite peculiar," he said.

He waited for the young woman to calm down and then started a steady in-and-out motion, thrusting all the usable length inside his patient.

"Relax," he said. "Don't try to control it." Which proved enough to make Lacey cum on the spot. This time moaning nervously. Hudson increased the speed. He felt the dildo jostling across a milking orgasm for at least twenty seconds. Then twenty seconds of easier sliding and another orgasm gripped his hand, forcing him to strain on the toy.

He let his patient enjoy the moment and when her hips stopped moving by themselves, the test ended, having seen the kind of trouble he got himself into.

"Ok..." he drawled, "I must say I've never seen anything like it."

"Yeah I get that a lot."

"I suggest we move on to a live test."

"You're the doctor, Doctor."

He took his clothes off and folded them on his chair. His penis was half-hard and leaking precum. She estimated that once erect he would score an honorable ten inches.

While putting a condom on, he addressed the camera in a quivering voice:

"It is now 4:36pm. Starting the in situ phase."

He crossed himself and stepped toward his patient.

*****

Lacey & David interrupted their lovemaking to look at the TV.

On it, Dr. Hudson was pounding away balls deep in her ass, and she was screaming herself hoarse, possessed by what looked like an endless orgasm.

It was a staggering document. A counter at the bottom left of the screen indicated her climaxes. So far 8 and not slowing down.

"How can they even tell," David wondered.

"Oh I helped them count them out."

"You knew they were gonna show this?"

Lacey felt butterflies in her stomach, which then found and ran along her husband's cock resting cozily inside her pussy. It wasn't Beth, it wasn't a character, it was herself being exposed nationwide as this surreal anal freak. And she was realizing how much she loved it.

She could see herself from the outside for once, losing control, voice bending, muscles twitching, face contorted into a wordless plea for more, her pussy dripping over the massage table because her asshole was relentlessly devouring a gigantic pleasure. It was indecent, more invasive than anything she ever did in her career. Her phone was ringing with texts non-stop.

At orgasm #46, Hudson grunted out of breath and gave a series of sharp thrusts.

His condom burst inside his patient.

Lacey flexed at the feeling of hot cum invading her insides. Oh fuck yes my clit is cumming at the same timeeeaaAAAHgHH AAAAAh Aah—

The couple on the couch shared a grin. They were used to see men yield to her aggressive style of ass-cumming. It was a rather hilarious sight. Even if David was often the prime victim of it.

Then they burst out laughing frankly when the clip faded to her later sessions over the three months. A goddam training montage. And of course the soundtrack was Michael Sembello's Maniac, that goddam Flashdance song. And sure it was cliché, sure it wasn't very Christmassy, but it was irresistible. They even found the lyrics to be surprisingly fitting, singing along ♫ And she's cumming like she's never camed befo-ore ♫

Lacey was showed fucking her ass in various ways, various positions, on a toy, on a penis, with some happy failures, some happier progress, getting battle-hardened before our very eyes.

The last shot was from her last session, riding Dr. Hudson reverse cowgirl, in perfect control, under the applause of an audience of patients brought in for the occasion. A lot of them were masturbating, counting down the seconds to orgasmless victory.

Hudson, lying on a mat in the yoga pose called Shavasana, looked half-dead but he was triumphant.

It was done. He had prevailed again.

Everybody cheered out "55, 56, 57, 58, 59..." and finally "2 HOUUUUUUUUURS WOOOOOOOOO!!!" Under a rain of confetti and Gatorade, Lacey dismounted the coach, ripped his condom off and stroked his worn out cock to explosion. It splattered her tits, it streaked her face and she took the rest down her throat. His wails were very unprofessional for a sex coach.

All around, all men, women, trans, sub, inter, over, out, fast cummers and jizz squeezers, clam misfits, gooners, diggers, queefheads, frigid, rigid, turgid, grubby-trainers and balls rejects, all were covering the floor with a plethora of bodily fluids and whatever their sexual orientation, they hugged and embraced and jumped in each other's arms, naked, still cumming or on the verge of. It's not everyday you celebrate an anus. Lacey's was loose, tired and puffy but it had not given in.

Back to the studio.

"I'm so proud of you, honey," David said.

"I love you, babe. Love, love, love you."

They kissed tenderly, rolling over the couch.

"I want you in my ass," she said, "I wanna show you what I can do now!"

David sat up all of a sudden. He had felt cold wind biting the sweat on the back of his neck. "Did you leave a window open?"

Lacey answered with a pert smile: "Me? Nooo..."

He jumped in startle as a shape entered the living room.

"Hi Lexa!"

"Hey you two! You look so cute!"

It was Alexa Vega, standing there, by the tree, wearing nothing but a red ribbon tied around her waist.

"It's midnight! Merry early Christmas!" she said with joy and chattering teeth.

"Merry early Christmas!" Lacey added for David. She felt his penis jump inside her. "It's your Christmas gift! Tonight you get my ass and a horny Alexa Vega just for you!"

Another penile jump.

The naked woman joined the couple on the couch.

"I'm so cold! I waited half an hour in the car like an idiot!" she whined as the skin contact was warming her up fast. The girls were smothering David with their gorgeous bodies. Four hands running all over him, their tongues going for his throbbing member and his balls when they were not simply licking each other anywhere they could. They muted the TV to hear their own moans better.

Lacey stood up and told her co-star to take care of her husband while she prepared herself.

David saw his wife pull her buttplug out as Alexa was taking him past her uvula. When her head wasn't bobbing up and down, she was swallowing over his shaft, she was fondling his balls, she was making him very vocal.

"Don't make him cum," Lacey told her, "I want his first load inside my ass."

"You thirsty girl!" Alexa said, letting go of her prey, strings of saliva dangling down her chin.

Lacey hopped back into the fun and pushed Alexa aside. Grabbing David's shaft, she sat on him and stopped only when she felt his balls against her cheeks. She gasped with satisfaction.

"Let's see if you're as good as Georgia Jones," Alexa said, mounting his head, parting her labia with her hands. Her fingers smelled like his wife.

He couldn't believe his luck. It wasn't the first celebrity orgy his wife threw but everytime it was unsurprisingly unbelievable. He wondered who would play him in his biopic. After he died of blissful burnout.

He took Alexa by the ass and opened her cheeks to push a knuckle of his middle finger through her anus.

"Patience, boy. You'll get this hole eventually but first you have to satisfy Lacey's."

The latter was thrusting up and down, moaning into Alexa's neck, playing with the two pairs of tits she had at hand.

There was nothing like the cock she had in her ass. She couldn't wait to share it with her friend. To watch her spasm all over it, squirt on his chest, maybe in her mouth too. Her clit reacted to the idea and pushed her to say "Lexa, once my ass is full of his cum, I want you to squirt inside of it! I want you both in my bowels!" of which she, in response, blurted out:

"Shut up you're gonna make me fucking cuuuHAAANNHGghaAaaahAAA—"

Lacey heard a wet noise and craned her neck just in time to see Alexa finish ejaculating over David's face. And that's when he started to groan. His cock swelled inside her, stretching her walls and hole even more and she felt a thick warmth invade her deep.

She pumped him harder to make him cum harder, as only she knew how.

In all this excitement, she lost track of her own sensations, but it was okay. There was nothing like the cum she had in her ass.

David, human, all too human and his last drop of semen milked out, started to go limp inside her. Lacey let him slip out, already scheming what to do during his refractory period.

Yet something was up on the back of her mind. Some sneaking suspicion.

Squeezing her anus tight to keep his precious load in, she went on all fours on the floor and told her friend to come feed her hole with another serving of fuckjuice.

"You sure you're alright?" Alexa asked. "You sound upset."

"Yeah nah. I wanna make sure of something."

So Alexa searched for the best position to squirt down a gaping asshole and, when she clumsily did, she flicked her clitoris and gushed generously, hitting the back of Lacey's overflowing rectum. She moaned at the guttery noise it made, fighting against the urge to plunge her hand into this.

David had not missed a bit of the spectacle and he was already hard and stroking again.

"Go take care of him, I want a second run," Lacey purred.

"Oh you thirsty, thirsty gi—"

Lacey was frowning.

"Ok, you tell us what's wrong!" they said in unison.

"I... I don't know..." she said, feeling at her anus, at her pussy lips. The mixture of squirt and cum was sloshing inside her but she wasn't giving any attention to it. "I...still can't feel any buildup. It's like my ass is numb."

They all stared at each other.

On the silent TV was an infomercial for a cheap Fleshlight knockoff.

The Hallmark star jumped to her feet, bowels gargling like a barrel of lust, not one drop spilling.

"Make him really hard," she said, "I want him back in my ass!"

Alexa turned around and in front of her face she discovered a David flaccid.

"I-I'm sorry!" he said.

"Oh my God no no no it's alright! It's adorable! Lacey look! he lost his boner cause he's worried for you!"

"You understand why I married this guy?" Lacey came back to the couch and fell in his arms. "Don't worry, David, I'll figure it out."

"What can we do for you, sweetie?" he answered softly.

"Get that cock hard, numbnuts! This ass is cumming the fuck out tonight, ya hear?"

At that, Alexa and her lunged at either side of him and started giving him the fiercest double blowjob not even a harem owner ever received.

They rolled him onto his side and while Alexa was gagging on his hardening cock, Lacey shoved her tongue far up his butthole. Everytime she made him moan a little harder she would lick up his taint to his balls and back to his ass.

And David had to tap out. Literally. And push their heads away from his crotch. But the two vixens threw him on the carpet in front of the hearth and Lacey straddled him with no chance of escape.

Alexa knew it was time to leave these two alone and went to choose a toy from the collection spread on the coffee table. She settled for a bullet vibrator and a suction-cup dildo. Classics but always reliable and it would allow her to watch the show at the same time.

Lacey had already taken her husband to the brim. She was squatting up and down his rod, focused on her technique, on her sensations, not letting him do anything. Every little movement she was testing was for herself and herself only. She worked her muscles around the cockhead rubbing upward and scrubbing downward. The boiling hot stuffing inside her was putting even more pressure on every detail, every turn.

She couldn't feel a thing.

She doubled down.

David threw his head back. He could feel a lot. But his main preoccupation was flexing his taint to delay his orgasm. What she was doing to him was so peculiar and so intense he had stars in his eyes and his penis.

Let's be real, David was no porn actor. His pornstar wife never asked for him to be, she never expected him to maintain industrial-grade stamina through hours of sphincter-damaging assaults. It's not what making love is about. However for what would be his second orgasm of the night, he was making quite a poor performance even to civilian standards. He could feel his balls shrivel like raisins around a roaring torrent of sperm that wanted out. All because the love of his life was doing, as put in his own words: "Oh my fuck, Lace. Feels like you're sucking my cock with your ass!" and she was doing it without any consideration for his well-being, meaning it was better than anything he ever experienced before. Her hole slurped and slithered and palpated around him, he couldn't even cling on some pace or pattern that would have helped him find a safety railing, she was just fucking him like a dildo. She was objectifying him and...it felt so agonizingly good!

His cock swelled—Perhaps it doubled in size, how could he be sure?—and the result of all these sensations she was throwing filled it up, squashed into one single point.

The point paused, suspended, and echoed with a Brahmanic OOOOOOM for a microsecond before detonating into the crampiest climax of his life as he wailed and clutched at the edges of the carpet.

(Alexa was cumming with him, silently, mesmerized and for once envious of the male orgasm.)

Lacey received his load eagerly and at the same time frustrated. Apart from the buzzing of his cum against her flesh, she was still not recognizing any sign of a buildup in her own pleasure.

So without any respite, she clutched at him and began pounding him into the ground.

"I want to cum for fuck's sake!"

She kept his cock hard by the sole power of her overtrained ass. He clenched his teeth and dove into the rapids. Even if the sex felt like a hickey at this point, at least he would not stay passive. He had a wife to please! He pounded up as she was piling down.

Alexa abandoned her toys and gripped her friend by the hips to help her piston her hole off. She tried to also help by rubbing her clitoris but her hand was harshly slapped away. "No cheating!" Lacey said.

The three of them were grunting like beasts, their nude bodies tense, drenched in sweat, trying to capture the elusive. They kissed, they triple kissed, they triple French kissed. The girls could handle it, they were pros, and David had already cummed twice, he could handle it.

Except he could not. He was piercing the heavens and the heavens were fucking him back and it was overpowering, past the pain, past the exhaustion, past a point dangerously leaning toward the addictive but which would blow up way before reaching it. Lacey was rushing all her possible spots, trying to gather all potential threads of pleasure in the walls of her slut-ass; instead she was funneling David's bloodstream, soulstream, with a slut-ass burning him to the core, swallowing him, nourishing him with its three reaped loads to keep away the chafing and enhance everything else in a carpet-bombing of heat.

The woman opened her eyes to something else than herself. And suddenly she understood. Her lover down there was fighting, or experiencing pleasure like a fight. It was absurd. And profoundly heart-rending.

She let go:

"I'm sorry, babe, I'm sorry. I went too far. Cum for me now. It's okay. We'll find something else."

She clamped her ass on his cock and drained him, with long-deserved eye contact, skin contact and lips meeting his lips.

He let out a low scream.

She moaned with happiness. He was cumming so hard and it was all that mattered really.

On a side note, he came really very hard. At orgasm #3, she would have thought he would just drip a few drops and pass out, but after fifteen seconds of him groaning and squirming and shooting inside her, eyes wide and face tight, it was clear her thwarted anus had sucked a massive orgasm out of the inmost depths of his loins.

What have I done, she thought, impressed with herself, and a little scared.

She jumped aside, spraying his lap with unspeakable goo, and reached for his penis and for Alexa. The two actresses, pressing their heads together, took all the ropes of semen he had left in him over their faces, shared it eagerly with their tongues as more was coming. When dribbles replaced the ropes, Lacey took the trembling beet-red dick in her mouth, softly enough not to hurt him any more but ardently enough to suck all the juices out and off of it.

Her clitoris came on its own doing it, because she could feel both their stares on her as she indulged in the naughtiest ass-to-mouth of the night and because it tasted like him, like her and like herself. She cried out her orgasm (not the one she sought but one good enough) over the soft cock and when she was done—done cleaning and done cumming—she hit the carpet with a thump and her long sigh fell over David, who had lost a few years of lifespan. Or maybe gained.

Lacey kissed him. "I love you so much! I love you both actually! I'm sorry I was greedy, I just lost my mind for a moment, I'll make up for it, I just need to make one phonecall."

David whimpered. Very thick precum was trickling down his peehole, not as arousal but as protection. Alexa wanted to touch his cock but it looked like a battlefield. After the battle.