A Night in the Theatre

He pauses for a while, spellbound by his memory, we suggest. Then he regains his composure and calls out, 'Back to our play...!'

'It alternates between the present and the past. The present, in which you are alone after your master has left you and you don't know whether he will ever return. And in which you look back on the past. That past becomes reality in flashback scenes. Do you understand? In that past, in the flashbacks in other words, your master acts, you live and talk with him, you do S&M scenes at his command, often in front of his friends. In the present, alone, you cannot live without him, re-enact scenes from the past by yourself, and finally make a drastic decision.

'Do you understand this? In a hurry, it sounds a bit convoluted.'

Juliette sighs and spreads her arms. It seems that for a moment she has forgotten that she is naked and at the mercy of Copain's gaze. She says:

'I believe so. There is a present, in which I am alone, and a past, in which my, um, master and life partner are still there, and sometimes his friends. In the past, we are together or doing, um, scene. In the present, where I've been abandoned by Master and miss him, I'm alone and act out those scenes on my own. And I'm naked all the time, whether it's present or past.'

'Very good. You said it well. Indeed, during the scenes in the present, you are alone on stage. Naked, as I said, that is, during one of the scenes you are wearing a mackintosh, nothing else. During the flashbacks, you are together with the actor who will play the Master. He will be dressed to the nines. For this role, I've chosen an older, famous actor, who also privately... Well, I'm saying too much already... I can't give you his name yet. If you pass the audition, I'll tell you, on the first day of rehearsal. You'll be delighted. Some of the flashback scenes include friends of your master. They have a few lines of text, but they are only glorified extras.

'We will now play a few scenes from the play. I will read the Master's lines.

'Remember, you play the slave. Try to be the slave all the time, in your role, but also when you consult me as an actress about the interpretation, or when I give you directions as a director. That will benefit the play. Method-acting, you know.'

Copain has remained down, in front of the stage. Juliette has sat down on the edge of the stage and listened carefully. She seems to have forgotten that she is naked. She had her legs open, carelessly, then she crosses them, thoughtlessly by the looks of it.

Copain cries out, 'No! Legs open! That's how a slave behaves! I forgive you, because how could you know? But please make this mistake only once! From now on, I will give you a slap on the ass - that is, if you give me permission to do so. Because it belongs to the role. May I do this, if you sin again?'

Her eyes have become as big as saucers. She is utterly astonished. She is asked to give him permission to punish her? Well, she wants the part and doesn't dare refuse. That is now almost secondary, however. It takes her a minute -- then she has brought herself to also buy the principle about Method-acting. She has inched past any natural reservations.

She smiles openly.

Let's pause for one moment and admire our lovely trooper. Not only she puts up with all this, but she embraces the challenges and smiles! The sun shines within her, warming us all.

'I give you permission, Monsieur Copain. Fully and openly.'

'Great! That's the spirit! But now stand up again. So, I repeat that if you sit, you don't cross your legs, but keep them open. If you stand, make sure you don't hold your hands together in your crotch like a schoolgirl and shield your sex. Or cross your arms underneath your bosom.

'Just don't do it! Is that clear? Do you understand? If you make either mistake you will get a slap on your bottom. I already have your permission...'

'Yes, fine! But not too hard.'

'Quiet!

'You don't speak like that to your master, that is, to the master I am playing. Say "I give you permission, Monsieur Copain, to punish me at your full discretion".'

By little jerky movements we can detect that Juliette must first suppress some annoyance, however good an actress she may be and in spite of her commitment of just a moment ago. Oh, she is just about able to stop herself from crossly crossing her arms in front of her chest. Copain-Auzières detects this.

'Very good, Juliette! You do well! Just like real life!'

Is there a hint of sarcasm in Copain's voice? Or is he really being mean? Or is he playing with her?

'But answer me. Say "I give you permission, Monsieur Copain, to punish me at your full discretion".'

'I give you permission, Monsieur Copain, to punish me at your full discretion.'

'Thank you, Juliette. I hope it won't be necessary. In real life, I mean. Exactly what gestures and actions we will use in the play, we will see as we go along. That is, if you pass the audition.'

Juliette smiles. She has once again recovered from having any reservations.

She says enthusiastically, 'I am very curious, especially about the text. And the action, the plot, of course. The motto "You are not prepared to be mine. Not unconditionally" makes me curious. I know now that they play is about a classic S&M relationship. That I have to be naked. If I pass, of course. But I'm naked already! And that the play is partly in the present, where I am alone, partly in the past where I am with the master and sometimes with glorified extras.

'Let's go and play.' She gives him, and us, another warm smile.

How Juliette, the actress, has grown! The time when she was a shivering, shuddering actress, sick from the stress and miserable from the cold and rain -- that time seems belonging to a different age almost.

He agrees, 'Exactly, that's what we will do. But, um...'

Copain-Auzières has been looking at her continuously, from the depths of the floor below her. His gaze has now sunk to his shoes, however. He hesitates... Very unusual for him.

'What is it you wish to say, Monsieur Copain?'

'Yes, the thing is... I want to see another act of submission from you. To see if you really want to humiliate yourself on this stage. That naked Ophelia will be nothing compared to this, you must know that...'

We see that Juliette suddenly becomes angry.

'Submission? Ophelia was nothing? As if it wasn't bad enough! We live in #MeToo times now! For me to be naked for every man and his dog, all of me, all of my intimate places for all to see! Humiliate myself? What do you think I am doing? Taking a walk in the park?'

And Juliette puts her chest forward, thus (unintentionally?) presenting her breasts, that jiggle, and crosses her arms underneath. Dark eyes ablaze.

Copain doesn't hesitate for a second, storms onto the stage towards Juliette and slaps her firmly on the buttocks with his flat hand, before she can react or even knows what's happening.

'Ouch!'

'No, hold your tongue! That's what we agreed! My right, your obligation!'

The actress stares at him in bewilderment. With tears in her eyes. She can't utter a word.

'Yes, Juliette, we agreed I could punish you for such transgression. This time you did not stop yourself. Nothing personal, of course, strictly business. Look, the beginning is difficult. I understand that. What we just did and will do is necessary, I think, to get the right frame-of-mind. Do you understand that?'

She seems to be recovering somewhat from yet another down. She is tough, though.

She composes herself, still a tad vulnerable, when she says, 'I understand, Monsieur Copain. Don't punish me when I say that I hope you understand that it is hard for me. I hurried incredibly to get here on time, I came terribly late, and on top of that I was very wet and cold and a real mess. A bad start to an audition, anyway, but especially given what you are putting me through. It is not that I don't want to follow you all the way. It's just very, very hard. I feel like crying!'

'I understand that, but at the same time it's also a good start, precisely because you're on your knees emotionally, on the verge of crying. Best to rebuild when you're down and out. Your master will take care of you.

'Do you understand, dear Juliette?'

Her gaze on the floor before her, she nods.

'Now, as I said, I want to see one more act of submission from you before we start. As low as you can get. Can we do that?'

Juliette shakes her head almost imperceptibly, before muttering, 'I don't know anymore... I have lost my will to... No... I'll do as you say, whatever it is. Whatever it is!' The last three words come out full-blast, as a throaty cry.

'Ok, all good! That's the way to do it! We're getting somewhere...

'The act of submission then.

'Well, so, turn around, with your back to the audience, bend over, as deeply as you can, until you can touch your toes, then put your hands on your buttocks and pull them apart, so the audience can see your sex and arse.'

She sighs and says, 'Mr. Copain! Oh, I really don't know why I'm doing this! This is very bad. I said I would do it, the fool... God, God... let it be over!'

And she turns her back to the room, bends over, touches her toes, puts her hands on her buttocks and pulls them apart. Between her legs, upside down, she looks at Copain-Auzières, who has gone back to his place in front of the stage and is looking at her sex and arse.

She groans, 'Nobody, really nobody has seen me like this... My ugliest, ugliest side!'

The director takes his time to respond, continuing to look at, well, inspect her 'ugliest side.' It seems to her that she stands there exposed like so for, well..., ten minutes. Endlessly. Finally, Copain-Auzières says, 'Thank you. You did well. There is strength in lowering yourself like this. You are ready for the role, but we'll get to this.

'I will say, though, that it isn't your ugliest side. Maybe your most beautiful... Your cunt and arse are beautiful and ugly. Like poetry. In the final analysis, they are very beautiful. Not ugly at all. I felt I could smell them, taste them, feel them. That's good. A master must experience his slave with all his senses, and vice versa. And punish her if she doesn't smell good. Doesn't smell excited. Or plainly smells dirty. This master doesn't like poo! So long as you know that. But he does like excitement.

'Your cunt, your little labia majora, your big labia minora, jagged, creased, slightly glistening... Perfect. Your arse, slightly discoloured, puckered... I'll spare you confrontation with my nose for now.'

He looks at her with serious face. No irony this time, for some reason. Her mood is indescribable. He mounts the stage again, goes up to her and lovingly touches her by the shoulder.

'I'm not making this an easy experience for you, I know. But you don't want 'easy' either, do you? You don't want to work with me for 'easy'. Maybe the experience so far is not precisely what you imagined. But the unexpected is really exciting for those of us that like a challenge. Don't you agree? As is the fact that you're open like this, literally but also metaphorically.

'But listen carefully. You mustn't do anything you don't want to. I don't think you will do anything you don't want to. I understand, as a prominent director I have the odds against me. You could say that the power balance is off - you want to work with me, you need a role -- therefore I make you do things you don't want to do. Yes, I can get just about any actress, but I don't want any actress, I want the right actress.

'I am a sucker for the right actress, let me tell you that secret. I need the right actress as much as she needs me, you need me. If that shifts the power balance, let it be. My confession here perhaps surrenders me to you. So be it! I surrender. We have come a long way since, what, an hour ago.'

He sighs, tilts his head forward and closes his eyes, leaving Juliette, who has straightened herself and turned around to face him, to wonder what this is all about.

He reasserts himself and reascends the stage. He takes some pages from the table.

'We are going to play. I hope you're the right one.'

He gives Juliette a few pages of text

'OK, the piece's working title is "ATTENDANT SANS DÉFENSE (HELPLESSLY WAITING)". You will read the part labelled "JULIETTE"- Surprised? You see I had high expectations of you - and I will read the rest, mostly labelled "MASTER".' It may be useful to know that the pieces in the past and those in the present will be differentiated by different lighting -- those in the present will be stark white light, those in the past by subdued tones.

QUOTE

MASTER, in the past:

"I am tired of you. Don't you see? You are not prepared to be mine. Not unconditionally.

"Goodbye to you and your life."

pause

JULIETTE, in the present, to the audience: "He looked at me for a few moments as I stood there, waiting. He then quietly closed the front door and was gone."

UNQUOTE

Copain, 'You noted my tone, partly tired and resigned, partly angry. I speak to you and you face me, but don't look me in the eyes, like a child that is being chastised. You at your turn speak to the audience, so you face the house. But you still look down, resigned and submissive. Your tone is flat.

'Let's do it again.'

And, yes, Juliette immediately reacts and picks the right posture and tone of voice. She IS the role. She is of unearthly beauty -- beautiful, naked and vulnerable. And humble, submissive.

Copain-Auzières tells her so. He says he is impressed by how she managed to grow in the brief period she has been here and that she wears her nudity like she has never been dressed in her life.

'Are you sure you are not a naturally submissive woman? I am amazed. Proud, yes, but clearly submissive. Many actresses are that way, you know, happy in the theatre where they are commanded, but only a shadow in their private lives, away from the limelight. Unless -- they find their masters, or mistresses in that life, the real life.'

Juliette looks at him, puzzled. 'Yes... You're right, it is true. I had almost forgotten! Each time it amazes me: I live, really am alive on stage.'

Puzzled, but by every word she speaks her confidence appears to grow. Explosively. She is a true actress; it is plain to see. She does not need clothes to be... be present.

'Ever since I joined the high-school theatre group all the men I have been going out with were actors. I'd say pretty strong actors. But none of them have lasted long with me, a few weeks or months. Until the one I broke up with a year ago. Him I went out with for two years. I was completely hooked on him and terribly jealous of the other women he met. With justification, hindsight tells me. Or maybe that prophesy was self-fulfilling. A terrible thought. I am still thrashed.

'If you say I am submissive, then he was not man enough to submit me. None of them was. The latest man, he was weak, the way I see it now, followed his cock. But I was weaker, not seeing him for what he was. I don't see myself as submissive, but just not always strong.'

Copain-Auzières looked at her, silently, and then said, 'I think what you say is true. I know who it is and I know him. I now know you a little now. And I do know myself.'

Juliette does not answer to this challenge, but continues her story.

'I don't know about submission. I am used to working under a director and doing what he tells me to do, according the dictates or more open suggestions of the script written by yet another person. I have never felt submitted by any of that. OK, I have argued my points if I felt something could be done better, but generally my attitude has been to find my freedom with the constraints given by director and script, reasonable or not. Maybe that is a submissive attitude. True, also, that most of my directors and writers were men.

'Maybe submissiveness is simply confused with the role woman has been forced to accept in society. And my being at my tether's end when I came in, well that was not submissiveness. Nor is my relative desperation to have this role.

'Come to think of it, back then as Ophelia and now in the role of the slave -- I don't like that word -- I feel fine. I feel empowered within the constraints of the role. The fact that I am naked and have shown you my most intimate bits, now that the dust is settling, it does not bother me at all. I am free on the inside, whatever the constraints. As long as I am alive.'

Copain-Auzières says, 'You really make progress and start to know yourself. That is good.' And he repeats himself, with more emphasis, 'And I know myself too. Moi, je suis Juliette. I could be Juliette.'

Juliette doesn't understand him, or does she? She doesn't address it, hardly seems to hear it.

The director doesn't dwell on his words either. He just says, 'Come, let's continue.'

Juliette reads and recites:

QUOTE

JULIETTE, in the present, to the audience: I am going mad waiting for him. I crave him. I need his mercy.

He is my Master! He should return, no matter what made him go away, regardless of the disobedience I must have showed.

If he was simply tired of me, let him in his absence realise that he needs me too, in his own way, the way of a master.

Or is this simply another test of my subordinance to him? Then the length of his absence should be finite. My waiting should come to an end.

UNQUOTE

She uses all the bashfulness, resignation, hesitation of a true submissive, if we can be the judges, and phrases her lines almost perfectly. Small, nervous, helpless gestures, an insecure posture, the hand flitting in front of the crotch and away... perfect!

But, wait, Copain sighs.

'You know, Juliette... The more you feel at ease with the text, the more confident you feel, the less convincing you are. Before, when you felt pushed and pressured, you were great, you were it, you were Juliette, the submissive. But now, you are good, good, good, but you are not 'it', you are not Juliette, Juliette the submissive. You are Juliette, the actress, a little too convincing, if that makes sense.'

He looks at her intensely. He gesticulates... We feel his passion. It's real now, he is not playing.

'Do you agree with me? Or do you feel you ARE your role?

'Tell me... What are we going to do?'

Juliette does not respond immediately. Then she too sighs and says,

'You are right, I was better before, when I was down. I am overshooting the mark, but I will get back to where I was before, without being down. It is early days, isn't it? I have not prepared; I haven't had the chance to see the text you wrote beforehand... I still need to grow. Become desperate again, as it were, while in control... I can do that, believe me...

We see her argue her position. We feel she wants the role, but it is no longer in desperation. She is inspired. She supports her arguments with arm movements, her torso moves, her breasts follow their own rhythm... (We love her. We must see her in this play!)

She continues, 'You, on your part, own the text and will sense, almost physically feel the smallest discrepancies in mine.'

Director and actress stand opposite each other. Both supremely confident. Time passes... in silence... They are thinking...

Then, we see it and shudder! It is not she, but he, that wanes. It is she that is the more confident of the two, notwithstanding his formidable black suit versus her nudity. (Oh, how she moves us!).

And she speaks...

'Wait... wait! I see it now, it is you... I feel it is you.

'Yes, YOU are Juliette... Like you just said... At the start, you pushed and pressured me and, as you said, I was down and out, wet and miserable... and nervous. And I felt it... And you dominated me. I feel you have come towards me, levelled with me... And are now -- I have to be careful -- sinking... Dare I say, submitting?'