All Comments on 'A Planned Seduction'

You made a big mistake which did have an effect on the plausibility of the tale to a reader,First thing any one presented with the photos of him and Marge would have immediately went and showed them to Marge..Simply things like that stand out and make or break a story.

Why was Marge left out of the loop? Also why does no one in LW stories get tested for drugs? Rohpynol can be detected for like 5 days. X longer. Or vice versa not sure which. It is significant here because he would have sexual assault added to his criminal docket. Rest of thr story was written well. I thought the acceptance part of the photos and her being in thr hotel room, though she at first resisted was a bit bland. Maybe George suspected she was raped?

Lot of holes. First there is zero investigation that she was drugged. It would be detectable in her system for days. Second, why would Alan tell them nothing of his plan? Ok he goes for a warrant but how does he know the conversation will be in Phil's office. Could occur in a lot of places. Hedge your bets. Moreover, her knowing could help her steer the dialog. Get the warrant set up but also wire her. It is a no brainer. Third, no discussion of what happened on New Year's Eve? None? Yeah ok Phil had to drug her to get into her pants. But not Harry Salter. He was making out with her and fingering her. She got home 15 minutes later. Thinking your spouse is cheating is not an excuse to cheat. She didn't even have the photos yet, right? So she jumps to infidelity. Ok she was drunk and angry and suspicious. Not saying that her husband doesn't forgive her, but at least discuss and what happened after he left. Fourth why no discussion with Marge? Sure she finds out only from the photos. But Marge is never talked to for the rest of the story? Fifth, why would dumbass predator use his wife Marge in the photos. Yeah shock value, but starts becoming refutable. If later she confronts Marge, Marge might be able to prove it was her but with Phil. Also she might be able to prove that certain suspected dates she was out of town or busy with an alibi. That can only increase Phil's risk. Six, why the stopping at no full intercourse? Was author trying to spare her a rape, yet she was still sexually assaulted? Phil just blowing early and getting so drunk himself makes no sense. How does it affect reconciliation. She would have been raped! How to prove it? Go back to testing for date rape drugs (see #1 above). So yeah plot holes. Not the author's finest.

lot of holes and the same old "revenge fuck" plot that the author does it in most stories. not good. 1*

2*

As others have described, the holes are huge. Lots of promises, but exactly how was Asshole punished by Law Enforcement and the judiciary? I guess We-The-Readers will have to take the word of the author!

There were certainly some holes but it was a nice story anyway. I think a proof reader, beta tester, etc would have been helpful. Still pretty good story. 5*****.

Bring back the Cat Of Nine Tails!... tear the hide off all the degenerate Phil's in the World!!!

What happened with her in bed at New Years Eve party? She was missing all night and she got caught at the end?

Right on orneryonez. And when we're done with the cat o' nine tails, then the electric chair. Nice story Blue.

Real justice is becoming a memory.

The author has given us a profound story to remind us that justice used to work.

The Hoary Cleric

Janet was Whore!

It seems mental case's get involved in comments. Questionable parts of story.

" Anonymous x days ago wrote

Janet was Whore! "