A Shadow of Scarlet (Book #3)

As Himura pronounced his disavowment in the old terms she knew and believed in, Callie hung her head. She shivered in Maria's arms again. Maria hugged her tighter.

"Master Himura? Are you sure that's wise?" Karen appeared at Himura's side.

"Wise? I don't know. I only know that she clings to a broken, useless vow. She attempts to patch what is broken with more promises. But a patch is weak. She is weak because of it."

"Her strength has always been that she knows what is right and what is wrong. Her faith in herself is based in her oaths. She is who she is because of what she has promised to be. She believes in herself more than anything, or anyone, else."

"And, with a broken promise, she doesn't know who she is, or who she is supposed to be. What she is supposed to do." Karen finished his thought. "The broken promise also prevents her from moving forward as well."

Himura nodded. "By releasing her, she is free to choose again. Or not. The choice is still hers. What she will choose is up to her and her alone. No one else can know what she will choose to do."

"The shadows know." Callie's whispered words made Karen kneel in front of her again.

"The shadows know what?"

"They know. I chose and they know."

Karen smoothed Callie's hair. "I don't understand. What shadows?"

"The shadows in her mind. The ones that want to kill her."

The low husky voice startled Himura. Spinning, he saw the black woman who had come to his studio to pick up Callie when she'd been injured. She bowed to him. Krav Maga.

"Kida." Chasandra said softly in respect.

"Want to kill her? Who wants to kill her?" Himura asked her as he also bowed in return. No one answered him.

The black woman knelt in front of Karen, who touched her on the top of her head gently. "Thank you for coming."

"I am here as commanded. I obey the will of Scarlet."

"I obey the will of Scarlet." The voice came from the doorway. "I am here as commanded."

"I obey the will of Scarlet." A third voice joined the second.

Himura looked at the two men who had come in. They were both kneeling. He looked at Wolfe again.

"Who is she? Tell me!"

"Sei-i Taishogun." Callie whispered.

"Impossible!" Himura denied Callie's claim. "She is a woman."

"She is. To them." Callie explained in a nearly silent voice.

"Say E Tie . . .?" Wolfe tried to force her mouth to form the odd syllables.

"Sei-i Taishogun. Ancient Japanese. It means Battlefield Commander Against The Barbarian Horde. Today we just say it as Shogun." Himura corrected Wolfe's pronunciation. "It's impossible. Unthinkable."

"Samurai?"

"No. Samurai were the warriors of the Shogun. The Shogun were the commanders. The leaders. They stood next to the Emperor in power. There were none higher. Except the Emperor, who was a living God. The Shogun ruled in the Emperor's name. Everyone obeyed them. Or else."

"So, Shogun." Wolfe looked thoughtfully at Karen. "It fits. Yes."

"Impossible." He said again.

"Truth." Callie told him still whispering. "Absolute truth. To them, she is Sei-i Taishogun. Watch. See the truth."

More people came into the fitness center and knelt to Karen. One by one she touched each of them on the top of the head. Thanked them for coming to her call. Each of them repeated the words Chi had already heard.

"I am here as commanded. I obey the will of Scarlet."

A petite redheaded woman entered. She did not immediately kneel. Instead she set down a baby carrier with a tiny newborn inside and hugged Karen. After the hug, she knelt and repeated the ritual words.

"I obey the will of Scarlet. I am here as commanded."

"Thank you Violet. I'm sorry I had to call you." Karen lifted the redhead to her feet and kissed her lovingly.

"Am I recalled?" Violet asked after the kiss was finished.

"No. Callie needs you to witness her oath ceremony."

"Then, what's all this?" Violet gestured to the darkened mall.

"It's an emergency. To save a life."

"Whose?"

"Callie's."

"CALLIE? What's wrong with Callie?" Violet whipped her head around.

"Callie wants to die." Chasandra explained. "Her heart is broken. Her oaths are broken. She has no reason to live. She chases death's shadow once again."

Violet toted her newborn over to sit on the floor in front of Callie. She grabbed Callie's hands. "No! You will not do this! You will not!"

"Callie?" A young woman entered. Himura recognized T Rose, Callie's sister. She did not kneel but instead looked at the three women on the floor.

"Oh my God! Not again. Please, not again!" T Rose ran over to Callie. On her knees next to Violet she pleaded. "Please Callie, don't do this again. I can't bear it. Please."

Three more people entered. Two men and a woman. Chi recognized one of the men and the woman. They were Callie's parents. Chi had met them several times over the years. They drifted over to where Callie sat on the floor. Callie's mother gasped as she saw Callie's condition. The haunted look and shivering. Her father closed his eyes in pain as the nightmare of all parents began again for them.

The other man was a stranger to Himura. He paused slightly before walking over to Karen. She lifted her arms to him and kissed him.

"Thank you for coming."

"Why am I here?" The man asked her carefully.

"Callie needs witnesses for a ceremony. Witnesses who know her. I thought you'd like to be one of them."

"Why me? I barely know her. She's your assistant."

"Because I belong to you. Only you. She must understand that you permit this. That you want her to be with me. And I, with her. That you understand and accept her as one of us."

"Of course. I like Callie. I will certainly witness any ceremony she has if she wants me to."

"Go ask her. Please?" Karen gave Mitchell a little push. "Ask her if it's ok if you are one of her witnesses. Do not take no for an answer."

Seven

Callie watched as the others prepared for an oath ceremony. Other than Master Chi, none of them had any idea of what they needed to do. Other than they wanted to swear an oath with her. Make her promise things. Which she wouldn't. Not!

The black woman shooed everyone except Wolfe away from Callie. She folded her legs and sat in front of the much younger woman. The dim lighting made her look even larger than she was in reality. Callie shivered as the sight of the woman stirred an image in her memory. A memory she did not want to recall.

"Do you know who I am? Do you remember?" She asked Callie. Her voice was low and smooth. It held a slight accent.

Callie shook her head.

"I was there when you were ill. I was there. You talked to me. You know who I am."

Callie shook her head again. "I don't."

"You do. Questions were asked. Answers given. In the darkness. A Darkness lit with only candlelight and reflections."

Callie tried to jerk away from the memory as it crashed through her mind. In stark contrast to the hazy dreams and memories from her fever, this one was sharp and clear. Seppuku. The memory of the shadow and the gleaming Wakizashi sword. The candles and incense. And, the choice she'd made.

Wolfe's arms tightened, holding her in place as Callie continued to push to try to get some distance between her and the black woman.

"You remember. Yes?"

Callie nodded. Stopped fighting to get away and swallowed.

"We have a bargain. Do we not?"

Callie nodded again. Carefully.

"Choose. Do we honor the bargain? Or not? You know the cost that must be paid. Will be paid. Choose."

The black woman rose smoothly to her feet without allowing Callie to answer. Gesturing, she had Karen sit in her place in front of Callie.

"She does not understand the gift of trust. You must explain it to her. Without words. Words can lie. She must know the truth behind the gift. When she is ready, if she agrees, we will begin the ceremony. Master Chi and I will assist if necessary, but it is her ceremony. Callie will lead us through it, if she chooses this path."

Chasandra had everyone sit behind Karen on the mats in an arc. She gestured for them to hold hands by simply holding out her own hands to the men on either side of her. Without hesitation, they fitted their hands into hers, holding out their other hand to continue the chain to each end of the arc.

Karen scrunched closer to Callie. Until their knees almost touched. Leaning forward, she gently laid her palm over Callie's heart for a brief moment before withdrawing it and placing it on Wolfe's breast. Wolfe immediately returned the gesture. With a smile for Karen. Which made Callie remember the first time she'd seen them smile at each other. Callie looked down at her hands as both Karen and Wolfe turned their smiles on her.

Karen drew in a breath to begin a sigh as Callie looked away, then thought better. Slowly she let the breath back out again. Callie didn't need her to be frustrated. Or seem to be frustrated. Karen shifted her position again, getting comfortable. This wasn't going to be as easy as she'd first believed.

After thinking for a short moment, she held out her right hand. Palm up and open. Waiting for Callie's next move. It was the way she'd learned this lesson, when Chasandra had first taught it to her. It was how Callie would learn it now.

Callie looked at the hand which seemingly floated in space in front of her. She knew this game. Wolfe had played it with her once before. If Callie placed her hand in Karen's, Karen would immediately place both their hands in Wolfe's. As Wolfe had once done to her with Karen.

Callie shook her head, shoving her hands between and under her legs. "No. Trap me. Force me. I can't!"

Karen's voice was hollow. "Words lie. The gift cannot."

At the hollow sound in Karen's voice, Callie jerked. Her eyes flew up to look at Karen's face, Karen's eyes were blazing blue. Yet, Karen's face was impassive. Expressionless. She was waiting.

Not like a cat ready to pounce either. Even though her eyes blazed, as they did whenever she was angry, Karen was totally calm and passive. Waiting. Just waiting. With her hand out.

"Want to hurt me." Callie denied the offered hand. She shivered once again.

"Words." Karen flicked her waiting palm before returning to its upturned position. It continued to hang in the air in front of Callie. No threat. No emphasis. No urgency. Just waiting.

"Not Scarlet. I can't. I won't." Callie's voice was barely audible.

The waiting palm trembled. Flipped over, palm down. A heartbeat later, with an elegant roll of Karen's wrist, it flipped back up again. Flowering open to hold the same position again. Confused at what had just happened, Callie looked up at Karen again. Karen opened her eyes. The intense blue was gone. Karen's normal soft blue eyes looked back at her.

Callie turned her head to look at Wolfe seated halfway behind her to support her body with her own. She swayed dizzily. Nausea rolled her stomach as bile crept up her throat. The world tilted and spun. She gagged.

A gasp made her look at the others, the audience, watching in the semi-darkness. T Rose, seated at the end of the row, had her hand over her mouth. Her face was screwed in distress. Callie looked for, and found, her parents. Her mother's face was white, her grip in her father's hand even whiter. They probably didn't understand much of what was happening, but they knew that something important was taking place. Something which might determine their eldest daughter's future. Or if she even had one. The strain showing on her father's face was heartrending.

All of them waited on her. On her choice. Accept or deny. Love or sorrow. Life or death. Her choice.

Callie looked for the black woman. The shadow woman. Was she? The shadow in her dreams? Had they truly made a bargain? Was it only a dream? Or, a nightmare?

Finding her seated in the center of the arc, Callie squinted at Chasandra's face. Trying to see what, if anything, was showing there. Chasandra's face was smooth. Untroubled. She had her eyes closed. She looked to be meditating and unconcerned with the final outcome regardless of which way it ultimately went. To Callie's eyes, she was a block of pure ebony in the darkness.

Callie knew she was avoiding Karen's open palm and the question it presented. Evading the question of the open hand by turning her attention elsewhere. She gathered her courage, looking at the open waiting hand. Could she trust Karen to not entrap her? To not force her to do the things she was afraid of? The things she'd promised to prevent? To never do?

Lifting her eyes to Karen's face yet again, Callie tried to see what Karen wanted. As Callie looked deep into her eyes, Karen spoke.

"One." Karen looked down at her palm. As Callie looked also, Karen lifted her palm slightly and repeated her single word.

"One."

Callie looked back up at Karen's face. Karen, with her eyes only for Callie, lifted her other hand. Holding it out toward Wolfe in a high five position. Wolfe instantly smacked her palm into Karen's and locked their fingers together.

"Two." Karen's voice was still calm.

Wolfe turned her spare hand upward to mimic Karen's. Palm open. Fingers soft. Waiting.

"As equals. As three. Together. Forever. Always." Callie couldn't identify who said it. The words were only a whisper in the darkness. Seeming to come from everywhere at once.

Karen lifted her open palm again. "One."

"Two."

Wolfe lifted hers and Karen's joined hands. She held out her spare hand again. It was a clear invitation for Callie to join with them. To become the third in a new triad where before there had only been a duality.

Callie looked down at her lap. Uncertainty shorted out her brain. She wanted to, but she was afraid. Afraid that things would be as they were. Afraid she'd be used to hurt again.

A ripping sound made her look up. Wolfe had unzipped her spandex exercise top to expose her chest. The similarity to the video where she'd been almost raped was startling with the edges of her clothing gaping open. Even her top was the same color. Unlike the video where her black bra was visible, today she had nothing on underneath her workout top. Not even a jog bra. Callie saw her skin prickle with the sudden exposure to cool air.

Gently, Wolfe pried one of Callie's hands out from where she'd stuffed them under her legs. Softly, Wolfe kissed Callie's palm before placing Callie's hand on her bare chest over her heart. It was a gesture which said: This is me. Only me. There is nothing between you and me. Nothing artificial. Nothing false. Nothing hidden. Only me. See me. Touch me. Know me. Love me. As I am. Only me.

Callie's palm tingled from the kiss. She felt the familiar double beat of Wolfe's heart. A heartbeat she'd felt countless times in the weeks just past. Her world tipped again. She swayed in response trying desperately to steady herself. To find her center. Her balance. She retched. Swallowed. Tasted bile and vomit before she swallowed again.

"One." Karen held up her waiting palm.

"Two." Wolfe's and Karen's hands were clasped again.

Callie nodded. She knew what they wanted. What they offered. The promise. A place for her. A place where she'd never be lonely or alone. Never be rejected or misunderstood. Never be abused or hurt. A place where she could be accepted for who she really was. Everything she was. To love her. All of her. Not just the parts of her that were ok to talk about. The parts that were normal while ignoring the parts that were not.

She knew she wanted to. She wanted what they offered. Desperately. But, was it true or only something she was wishing for? Could she trust them? Trust them with her most vulnerable self? Should she risk it all again? Could she? How much pain could she endure if it all went sour again?

Wolfe's heart beat on with a continuing double thump. Smooth and steady. Unstressed. Callie felt Wolfe take a breath as Wolfe's chest rose. Thump, thump. Thump, thump. Thump, thump. Breathe. Thump, thump.

The rhythm was reassuring. Calming. Comforting. She wanted to curl up like a cat before a fire on a cold night and listen to the beat. Come home. Come home. Come home. The beat urged her to join with both of them.

Callie again looked over the arc of people seated before her. Her parents were stressed but hopeful in a good outcome even if they didn't know how or what. Her mother did not look happy at Callie's hand resting on Wolfe's naked breast, but she was not objecting. Her father was ignoring the near nudity in front of his eyes.

Rose was crying from fear that Callie would be sick again. Or, maybe die. Paul, Erik, and Lainey all had worried looks on their faces. Worry for her. They were her friends. They liked her and wanted to be around her. To be her friends.

Violet was the most confusing question. Why did she like Callie so much? And, why did Callie like her so much in return? They barely knew each other and it wasn't a physical attraction either. So why?

Callie didn't know the answer. She looked and found Violet seated between Paul and Erik holding little baby Daniel. Violet looked down at her son occasionally but mostly watched Callie.

"Please say yes." She mouthed silently at Callie over Daniels blanket shrouded form.

Paul and Erik rested their hands lightly on her forearms as she held Daniel in her arms. The four of them were linked. The chain unbroken.

Master Himura, [INSERT NAME HERE], her master no longer, looked confused. And very uncomfortable with his hand being held by the unknown man sitting next to him. Karen's husband, Mitchell, was composed. He'd already told her that he didn't mind if she promised to be Karen's friend and companion. Even if she didn't, she was still part of their family. He'd kissed her! With Karen watching while he did it too!

As Wolfe's heartbeat continued under her palm, Callie looked over at the faces of the others who were there. They were the executives who helped run GreenWood. And Scarlet. She'd not met them except occasionally in the office. She didn't even know their names. Not really. She didn't know why they were here or what they wanted. Karen's face held no answers. Only that calm waiting. For her to choose.

Callie looked at the waiting palm. She knew what Karen's hand felt like. She knew what Karen's body felt like. And her kisses and caresses too. But not sex. For some reason, she was not interested in having sex with either Karen or Maria. Both of them were sexy, beautiful and desirable. Yet, she did not want to have sex with them.

Neither of them seemed to expect, or want, to have sex with her either. Whatever kind of relationship they had, it wasn't based on sex. And, that was ok with Callie too. She didn't need sex to love someone.

Or did she? Callie thought about it before deciding that, no, she didn't need to have sex in order to love anyone. What she needed was what Karen was offering. A place to be herself.

Chasandra opened her eyes as Callie lifted her free hand. Hovering it over Karen's palm momentarily before letting it fall softly into place. Karen's hand was relaxed and remained open. Neither gripping nor rejecting Callie's hand. Waiting for Callie to finally choose the limit of what she was willing to do.

Callie understood the choice was fully hers. Yes or no. The choice wasn't whether she could stay or not. It wasn't even if she would obey Karen or not. The choice was whether she was willing to accept or not. Accept Karen, and Maria, and Scarlet. Without judgment. Without fear. Without pretense. If she could, they'd accept her in return. Without reservation and with their full trust in her. She would finally be somewhere safe where no one would ever misunderstand her or expect her to be like them when everyone knew she was not.