Accidental Honeymoon Pt. 01

Accidental Honeymoon - Part One

Initially written in 2007, re-written in 2023

My parents had been looking forward to their second honeymoon for almost a year. My mum had been just 20 and my dad 22 when they accidentally conceived a child. Thanks to my mum's overly religious parents, who couldn't handle having a grandchild outside of wedlock, my parents had had a very hurried wedding followed by a very cheap package holiday in a grotty hotel in Spain for their honeymoon.

Ever since they'd regretted it and talked about wishing they could have done something more memorable. So now, 18 years later and with my dad's 40^th birthday as the justification, they decided on a second honeymoon of three weeks in a five-star exotic hotel in Bali. As an 18-year boy, I was also looking forward to their trip away as they'd agreed to let me stay home alone now, albeit I knew my mum had asked her sister to keep an eye on things just in case I decided to throw any wild parties!

Since their early marriage, both my parents had worked hard to build their careers; they decided not to have any more kids, so I was an only child but was ok with it; I had plenty of cousins and friends around as I grew up. Our little family wasn't made of money but was doing ok, so my parents' once-in-a-lifetime far eastern trip had taken months to save up for and plan.

The bad news came only a few days before they were due to leave. The big project my mum had been involved with at work for months, which was expected to be finalised before their trip, suddenly had a significant setback. She came home in tears that evening.

"None of us can believe it; Darren says the business can't afford to deliver not on time and has cancelled everyone's holiday for the next month at least, plus he said we'll have to work overtime!"

"You mean he's cancelled your leave? He can't do that, can he?" my dad replied, the life draining from his face as he realised the impact.

"Yep, all annual leave is withdrawn, and he made it clear anyone who doesn't show up will be in trouble", mum replied, clearly heartbroken.

"I guess we'd better call the holiday company right now; they might let us rearrange."

"Yeah, I guess so", she answered without much hope in her voice.

A flurry of phone calls followed as they tried to rearrange but to no avail. Due to the small print, the only refund they could get was for the minor stuff like taxis to the airport, a tiny fraction of the more than £7000 they'd already paid. Even their holiday insurance company managed to weasel out of agreeing to pay up as they claimed it wasn't a good enough justification for cancelling at such short notice. So they were faced with a huge decision, either lose the thousands they'd spent and not go or seriously risk my mum's career, which she had spent the best of ten years building up, by going AWOL. It was getting late, so I left them to make some tough choices and went to bed.

The next evening my mum arrived home from work, and as we sat down together, she said she had both good and bad news.

"Darren is being a right hard ass, I asked meekly about any chance of still having time off, and he said yes but don't expect to have a job to come back to or a good reference on my CV!"

"Oh dear, this is insane. Is he that desperate?"

"Yep, it seems so; the rest of the team agreed after he left that it was a shocking situation, and we'd all start looking for new jobs as soon as possible as we don't want to work for such a man. It used to be such a good place to work as well..." she drifted off sadly.

"But we just can't afford for me to be made redundant at the moment, especially not if we're going. So we can't get money back for the trip," she added, "Speaking of which, I called the holiday company again at lunchtime, and they agreed that whilst we can't get money back at such short notice, they would allow us to change the names on the booking if we can find someone else to go instead."

"Really? Well, that's an option," dad replied, "Got anyone in mind?"

"Unfortunately not; let's ask around and see if we can get any takers; you try your friends and family, and I'll try mine. Jimmy, I don't suppose you know anyone?" she asked me.

"For a three-week, seven-grand holiday with less than two days' notice? Yeah, going to be tough, but I'll try."

We all spent that evening trying every possible contact we knew and even into options of offloading the trip online. Still, as I suspected, no one was willing to shell out that amount of money at such short notice, even if it was for a luxury trip to a tropical paradise; at least, no one we trusted would pay up in time.

It seemed they were back to square one as we all sat there trying desperately to think of another solution when my mum said, "Well, you and Jimmy could always go; he does have all the time off from school now that he's finished his exams after all!"

It was true; I'd finished my A-levels a few weeks before and was facing a summer of not much until I left for university in the autumn.

"Well, it's an option, I guess, though not sure it'd be Jimmy's thing, would it, son? Three weeks lying on a golden beach surrounded by hot lasses in bikinis..." dad joked half-heartedly.

"Ha-ha, yeah, I'm sure that'd be 'awful' dad!" I joked back.

"To be honest, dear, if we can't find anyone else by the end of tonight, you two might as well go; we have paid for it, and it'd be silly for you to go by yourself, even if was meant to be our honeymoon together."

I suddenly found myself half considering it. Yes, I'd been looking forward to a few weeks of teenage freedom at home, but I guessed I could handle an exotic holiday instead, even if it were with my old dad.

The following day mum woke me and said, "You had best get packing, Hun, as you're off to the far east for three weeks tomorrow morning". I could tell she was trying to fake a smile, but I wouldn't say I liked the situation. "There's loads to get done, so time to get up."

The rest of that day was a mad rush. There were phone calls and messages to change the booking, looking desperately for my passport, which we finally found hiding in a box in the garage of all places, and throwing together what hot weather appropriate clothes I

I didn't have proper luggage as I didn't go away, but my parents had bought a massive set of matching cases and bags for their special trip and had a few spares I could use. It was heartbreaking as my mum moved past the cases she had already started packing in anticipation only a few days earlier.

"It's ok; I'll unpack them in a few days after you two have gone; I can't face it today."

As I hadn't been expecting to go away, I didn't have much hot weather-appropriate clothing but threw what I had into the cases along with my bathroom product and other stuff which came to mind.

By the evening, we were all exhausted, and the house seemed like chaos which didn't help with the upsets all around; it wasn't how anyone wanted to feel the night before a fancy vacation, but it was what it was.

As we'd need to be up at 3 am to head to the airport, we all had a very welcome early night.

The alarm on my mobile went off at 2 am, and I reluctantly dragged myself out of bed to shower. As I washed my body and shoulder-length hair, which I'd been growing out for a while, I reminded myself not to show too much excitement about the situation for my parent's sake, especially not in front of my mum.

As I knew it'd be a long flight, I opted for comfort over style with some tracksuit bottoms and an old t‐shirt and tied my hair back into a ponytail.

"You can't turn up at a fancy hotel looking like that, Jimmy", my mum chastised me.

"After such as long flight, I'll probably look terrible either way, so I might as well be comfortable on the way. I'll have plenty of time to change once the jetlag has worn off."

As time was tight for us to make the flight, we rushed to get the cases in the car and drove to the airport on empty night roads.

Mum waited around whilst we checked in, and our baggage was weighed; dad joked that there were fewer bags, at least without my mum going.

As mum kissed us goodbye at the security checkpoint, I felt guilty & told her that I was sorry and felt like I'd. stolen her place.

"Don't say that it wasn't your fault, honey, and this was the least bad option. I'm sure you'll have a great time. And promise me you'll make sure your dad has a good time; you know he's upset about everything."

"I'll try, mum; I'll try. Love you, talk to you when we get there," I replied as I left my parents to say their tearful goodbyes.

"Thanks for being good to your mum Jimmy'" dad said once we were settled into our plane seats and in the air, "The last few days have been hard for her."

"For both of you, I'm sure, dad."

"You're right there, though at least I'm now getting a holiday; she's just got three weeks of hard work to look forward to whilst we're relaxing on what was meant to be her dream trip. I'll check in with her as much as possible whilst we're away; I'm just hoping we can save up enough to try again soon. I know this was partly a birthday trip for me, but having a proper honeymoon for us was more important."

"I know, dad, I know."

"Speaking of being a honeymoon, I think mum booked various special add-ons, and we're in the bridal suite, but we can see what we can do about that when we get there."

"Ah, I'm sure we'll cope. I guess this is one of those add-ons," I added as the air hostess brought us over two glasses of sparkling wine.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I've got this down as for a Mr & Mrs Anson?" she asked, slightly confused, looking at dad and me.

"Ah yeah, there's been a slight change of plans; thanks anyway though", dad replied as he took the glasses and handed me one.

"Well, here's to our 'honeymoon', Jimmy", he joked as we clinked glasses.

The flight was VERY long, and even the comfort of being in first class couldn't make up for the sheer boredom of it. Eventually, I managed to sleep after watching a few films. After that, however, the change in Singapore felt like a hazy dream as we hung around the airport. It wasn't until Ngurah Rai airport that I was forced to wake up properly.

We collected our bags, and dad found a taxi to take us across the island, where we caught a small boat to one of the more remote islands. I'd never been outside of Europe before, so it was all so amazing to be in a different culture, and even the jetlag didn't seem too bad, albeit I wasn't sure what time of day it was.

As the sun began to go down, our boat arrived at the hotel island, where a porter appeared out of nowhere to carry our luggage from the boat and directed us to the reception building.

"You may as well go have a look around, Jimmy, whilst I sort out our booking," dad said.

I wandered around and took the place in; it was apparent why my parents had booked here for a special holiday; it was close to a tropical paradise. The site wasn't a hotel in the traditional western sense; it was a collection of different sizes and shapes of beach huts and villas spread around the small island surrounded by palm trees and beaches. Some of the villas looked as big as our house! I wondered which ours was going to be for the next three weeks.

On the downside, it looked like there wouldn't be many other young people about, male or female; I guessed that the price must put off backpackers and families. Although even my dad, at 40, seemed younger than most of the other guests that I could see that were wandering around, many of whom gave me slightly dirty looks, maybe my mum had been right about my appearance in such a place or perhaps it was just my age. Also, there didn't appear to be many things to do; I guessed the place was designed for older couples to relax and enjoy the finer things.

I sat on a beach and admired the sunset while waiting for my dad. Yeah, so there might not be many hot chicks, I thought to myself, but the clear blue sea and palm trees kind of made up for it. And my mum had made me promise that I'd do whatever I could to make sure dad had a good time, so I'd better show lots of enthusiasm and not look a gift horse in the mouse, as the old saying went.

After a while, one of the porters came over and asked me to follow him to our private villa. I chuckled to myself when he called me madam, guessing his grasp of English wasn't great. As it turned out, our villa was one of the smaller ones, so small that I began to wonder just how comfortable it'd be, especially as it looked made of reeds. Thankfully, it was modern on the inside, albeit on the cosy side. I thanked the porter for help, bid him goodnight and went to find dad. I found him outside the back investigating the Jacuzzi in our private garden area.

"Pretty good, ain't it, dad?" I said, trying to sound upbeat.

"Oh yes, just like the pictures your mum and I looked at when we booked", he replied, sounding sad.

"Shall I get you a drink? I think there's a mini‐bar in the lounge kind of area?" I offered, hoping it'd help improve his mood

"Cheers, that'd be good. A gin and tonic, if there is one."

"Coming right up."

"Get yourself one whilst you're at it; it's all-inclusive, so we might as well make the most of it."

I returned with the drinks a few minutes later and sat on one of the sun loungers next to where dad was sitting, looking out at the sea.

"Oh, by the way, there's been a bit of a mix-up with the hotel as well. Not so much a mix-up, more a breakdown in communications."

"How'd you mean?"

"The message about the change of visitors didn't filter through to them here, so they still had us down at being Mr and Mrs Anson on our second honeymoon."

"Oh well, did you put them right at the desk?"

"Well, I tried, but I get the impression no one here speaks English well, not even the manager, it seems. I tried to explain we'd like a larger villa with two bedrooms, but the gist seems to be we're stuck with this one, at least for the first week. After all, it's one of their bridal villas, which means there's only one bedroom...."

"Ah, right", I replied uncertainly.

"I know it's not ideal, son. I'll go have a word with them again tomorrow and see what they can do, but if not, it looks like we might have to share the bed initially unless one of us wants to sleep on the sofa for three weeks!" he laughed.

"They don't look the comfiest of sofas", I replied

"No, I didn't think so either; I'm sorry, Jimmy."

"Don't worry, dad, it's not your fault; we'll make the best of it."

"That's the spirit! Now shall we go and unpack?"

"Sure, I might have to hit the hay soon; I think the jetlag is kicking in."

"Yeah, me too; why don't you go get started, and I'll nip to the loo."

As I headed back inside, I could tell he was disappointed by what seemed like yet another issue. Whilst I put a brave face on it to make dad feel better, if I was being honest, I wasn't that chuffed about the situation. Walking into the single bedroom, I first noticed the size of the enormous four-poster bed; at least if we had to share it, there would be plenty of room.

The porters had brought all our luggage in here, and I started to sort out my cases from dads but was in for an even bigger surprise. Opening the first of what I thought was my smaller case, I was confused by its contents, to say the least; inside were some books which weren't mine, and they didn't look like dad's taste either. Indeed they were exactly my mum's taste! I was annoyed that it looked like we'd somehow managed to bring one of my mum's bags in a rush to get to the airport. Curse this matching luggage set! This should have been my little case where I'd packed most of my underwear and a few t-shirts; what would I do without them?

I turned hopefully to what I assumed was my larger case but had a horrid suspicion which was confirmed as I unzipped it. Inside it, rather than my scruffy teenage boy clothes and other stuff, were brightly coloured light summer tops, evening dresses and loads more of my mum's clothes. It was terrible, and I almost cried before I tried to man up a bit, even if I was in shock.

"Dad, you best get in here; we've got another little problem!" I shouted

"Why, what's gone wrong now!?" he asked as he came in a bit exasperated.

"You won't believe this, but we've managed to cart mum's luggage halfway across the globe and left mine at home!"

"What?! Eh?! How did that happen?!" he asked, as confused as I was, "This holiday just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it?!?" he added sarcastically.

"I know it's shit, isn't it"

"Jimmy! Don't swear. Even if it is kind of valid."

"Sorry, dad. I assume all my stuff must be sitting at home; I wonder if mum will be able to send it to us?"

"It's possible. I'll call her; it shouldn't be too early or late there now. It will probably cost us quite a bit, but I don't think there are many shops around here, and given your build, I don't think most of mine will fit. You always did take after your mum."

He was right; even at 18, I was still a bit of a late bloomer, I was only 5 foot 3, and I hadn't bulked out much, unlike my dad, who was in decent shape and nearly a foot taller than me.

"I wish I'd pack a change of clothes in my hand luggage or at least something to sleep in."

"Well, until we can get something else sorted, why don't you have a look through your mum's stuff? There might be something that you can sleep in, at least. I'll be back in a bit. So don't wait up if you need to sleep."

"Ok, fingers crossed we can sort something out."

Dad headed off to call home whilst I started having a better look through the cases that mum had packed full of feminine stuff. Eventually, I found a plain-ish white cotton nightdress like an oversized t‐shirt; it would have to do for sleeping in as I didn't fancy sharing a bed with my dad in just my dirty boxer shorts.

I stripped out of my sweaty travel clothes, slipped the nightdress over my head, and did up the few buttons on the front. It felt weird to wear my mum's clothes, even just a simple piece.

In my rush to find something to wear, I'd spread my mum's clothes all over the floor but guessed I'd best tidy up before giving in to the urge to sleep. So I began to put it all back into the cases before deciding it would be easier to use some of the drawers and plentiful wardrobe space, especially as I suddenly realised I wanted to investigate some of them in more detail for some reason. There were various bits of silky and lacey lingerie, including what looked like some bridal wear; yeah, It seemed like mum had been planning to make this a romantic honeymoon holiday, which slightly upset me. There were a few swimsuits and bikinis; the rest seemed to be dresses, skirts and sarongs, which I put away as best I could. Once I'd cleared the floor, I climbed into bed, which was super comfortable, and rapidly fell asleep, not even dreaming or thinking about my situation.

The following day, I awoke to find that the other side of the bed hadn't been slept in, and I worried that dad hadn't come back last night.

Without getting changed, after all, I didn't have much to wear; I headed into the little kitchen/living area and found dad asleep on one of the sofas.

He stirred as I walked over, "Morning darling...oh shit, sorry, morning Jimmy." He added, looking slightly embarrassed.

"Don't swear, dad!"

"I know, sorry. I'm used to your mum wearing that nightdress, though it seems to fit you about as well."

"Ok, don't rub it in. Anyway, what are you doing on the sofa? I thought we were both going to share the bed?"

"By the time I got off the phone last night, you were fast asleep, and well, I didn't want to disturb you, so the sofa seemed the best option."