Allyson Ch. 06

Allyson frowned, "He can't do that. He has to go east and continue his studies."

Jeremy smiled, "He cares a lot about you. I don't think he'll go anywhere if he's not sure you'll be safe."

This troubled Allyson. How did Paul's studies suddenly become her responsibility? Her mind was muddled; probably from what happened and from the medicines. She knew two things; one she was nothing and two Paul's future was the most important thing. Why did everything have to be so complicated? She felt a little queasy, "I want to go back to bed."

Jeremy stood, "Want me to help you?"

Allyson started to answer but never got the chance.

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In the dining room Audra knew when it was time to make an entry. She walked into the kitchen, "Oh there you are." She walked over and felt Allyson's forehead with her hand. Not satisfied she leaned forward and pressed her lips to her forehead, "You're still very warm. Let's get you back to bed."

Allyson looked up. Her eyes were watery.

Audra wasn't sure of it was the fever or if she was getting ready to cry. She helped her to her feet, "Come on sweetheart."

Allyson leaned her weight on the older woman, and together they started back upstairs.

As they started out of the kitchen Allyson leaned back around and looked at Jeremy, "Thanks for the coffee." She perked up a tiny bit, "You say he cried?"

Jeremy smiled broadly; then he took one fist and softly punched it into his other fist, "He sure did. I really got him."

As the two women started down through the dining room he heard Allyson say, "Did you know your husband punched John Bennett in the nose?"

Then he heard his wife, "My husband doesn't like it when a man hurts a woman, and besides you're one of the family now."

Allyson breathed a deep sigh and let Paul's mom help her back upstairs and into bed.

As she lay down Audra asked, "May I check your back?"

Allyson sat still while Audra took off her nightie, looked her over and applied a little more of the medicated salve. Then she pulled out a soft silk nightshirt, one of the items Lauren and Ariel had bought the day before, "Here slip this on honey." She gently wiped a few errant fronds of hair away from her face, "Lie down sweetheart."

As Allyson lay back down Audra pulled the quilt up and helped her lay her head on the big pillow, "Go back to sleep now. The boys will be home soon."

Allyson put her head back on Paul's pillow. She sniffed at the old spice in the covers. She drifted off to sleep thinking of Paul, his heroism, and who he got it from.

Audra sat back down in the lazy boy. She thought about what she'd heard. It might be easier than she thought. She was convinced Allyson had very strong feelings about her boy. Maybe not love, they were both too young anyway, but she bet there wasn't much Allyson wouldn't do for Paul right now. Next was to find something meaningful for Allyson to do. If she could keep her home then everything just might work out. A cloud drifted over her emotionally. She hoped she wasn't deceiving herself. No, she had to trust Paul's judgment, and her own.

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The boys finished at Denny's and drove on home. Over tired and over fed Wayne pulled the Blazer into the drive. All three climbed out and slumped their way into the house. Wayne and Aubrey made beelines for their respective bedrooms.

Paul had other concerns. His bedroom had been appropriated, and though exhausted, he hoped to be able to satisfy Allyson's request and see her.

He stepped in the kitchen and saw a fresh pot of coffee. It wasn't the same pot Jeremy had fixed earlier; that was two pots ago. This was a brand new freshly made brew.

Paul stumbled over and grabbed a cup. He looked at his father who was busy opening cans, "Mind if I have a cup?"

Jeremy, not bothering to look up, answered, "Help yourself."

Paul poured a cup and asked, "Have you seen Allyson?"

"She was up earlier. We had a cup. She went back to bed."

"How's she doing?"

"I don't know Paul. I don't do girls."

Paul knew better, "Come on dad. What do you think?"

"About what?"

"Oh dad, you know. What do you think?"

"She's still in very bad shape. Her back's worse than it looks. She has trouble moving. She's still got a fever. Your mom's looking after her."

"I know all that. I mean, well, you know."

Jeremy wasn't in the mood to volunteer more than necessary, "No what."

"Did she say anything?"

"Say anything about what?"

"Dad, did she say anything about me?"

Jeremy could have said a lot right then, but he kept it close to the vest, "Don't get your hopes up son. The girl's been through a lot, I already told you I'm afraid she has a pretty low opinion of men. If I were you I'd be pretty careful."

Paul needed to know more, "Careful about what?"

Jeremy was hesitant but continued, "I think she likes you. She's grateful for what you've done, but I don't know if she feels anything special."

"You mean like love?"

"Don't confuse gratitude with love. She knows what you did for her. She wants you to be happy. She's worried about your future, but I'm not sure she sees you in her future."

Paul was crushed. He had his fantasies. He thought maybe, well..., "What do you think I should do?"

Jeremy turned around and stopped what he was doing, "Don't be pushy. Tell her how you feel, and leave it at that. If she feels the same way she'll tell you."

"What if she doesn't?"

Jeremy moved closer, "Paul you are who you are. Just be yourself. She's watching. If you're what she's looking for, if she's even looking, she'll let you know."

Paul waited for more, but his father was through.

Finally he said, "That's a tough one."

Jeremy chided, "It is what it is."

Paul changed the subject, "Is there any place I can crash for a while?"

Jeremy pointed to his hide out, "Back there."

Paul nodded and ambled over to the backroom door. He turned around, "Wake me in a little while."

Jeremy growled, "Get some rest son. You'll be in a better place once you get some sleep."

Paul turned and closed the door. He didn't think sleep would come. He was wrong. He was sleep before his head hit the pillow. The last thing that went through his mind was Allyson. He'd known her how long? Four months? This was Thanksgiving. Christmas was coming, and then he was off to school. If his mom could keep her around he'd have his chances. He went to sleep. He dreamed about a tiny little girl with big green eyes.

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Allyson reawakened. Audra watched as the younger woman tried to move around. She could tell her back was still bothering her, "Good morning again."

Allyson glanced over, "Oh hi again."

Audra asked, "Can I get you anything?"

"No I'm all right."

"How about a warm tubbie?"

"I can manage."

"You sure?"

"I think so."

"Hey look I'll just sit out here, if you need anything just call out."

"OK." Allyson slowly got up, wrapped herself in the robe the girls had bought her, and stumbled into the tiny bathroom. She slipped the robe off and lurched around looking for soap and shampoo. Everything was close by. She leaned over and turned on the water. She set it as hot as she thought she could bear it. Stiff and sore she tried to climb in the tub, but try as she might it was just too much. She sat on the side of the tub and started to cry. She wanted to do for herself. Why was everything so hard? This just wasn't fair.

Outside in the bedroom Audra heard the younger woman sniffling, "You sure you don't need anything."

Allyson called back, "No I'm all right." She tried to get in the tub again. Though she tried to cover it up she kept crying.

Audra came to the door and saw the problem, "Here sweetheart, let me help you in." She moved to the young woman and gingerly got her hands under her arms and lifted till she was able to slide in the tub. Audra knew right away the water was much too hot, "Let's put some cool in honey." She turned off the hot tap and let the cool flow.

Allyson didn't want to be helped, she didn't want to be treated like a child, but she felt so terrible, "I'm all right now, Thank you."

Audra didn't leave. She took her hand and gently wiped several fronds of hair from her face. The welts on her back though still bright red had started to close. The mother in her was working overtime, "Let me help you. Won't you please let me help you?"

Allyson was tired of being somebody's little girl. All that had done was cause a lot of pain, but she had to admit to herself she needed help,

"Maybe you could wipe my back a little."

"Of course," Audra took the soap and lathered some up in her hands. Using only the palms of her own soft hand she carefully wiped over the girl's injured back. The ragged striped welts still felt warm to the touch, "He really got you honey."

"It feels a lot better today."

"They look better, but I'm afraid you've still got a way to go." She wanted to find out as much as she could, "How did you and Mr. Bennett meet?"

"We were in college," She didn't offer any more.

"Were you two sweethearts very long?"

"Over a year."

"Did he ever hit you before?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh I'm sorry. It just hurts me to see you this way."

Allyson looked around slightly, "Why?"

Audra expected that, "Oh, you're a girl. You're small. You have a sweet innocent look about you. Men aren't supposed to hurt women. I'm glad my Paul got you out of there."

Allyson sighed, "Me too. Paul found me and carried me right out, right under John's nose." She chuckled slightly.

Sounding relieved Audra said, "You laughed."

"Mr. Hanson said he punched John in the nose, said he made him cry."

"I'm glad he did, though I know he never would have told me himself."

Allyson was curious, "Why not?"

"Oh he would never say he hit someone. Jeremy's a Vietnam veteran. I think he saw a lot of bad things. He thinks he's protecting me."

"That must be nice."

"Yes I guess it is. I mean I'm no porcelain doll. He and I have our fights. He can really yell when he gets mad, but he knows his limits."

"Has he ever hit you?"

"He slapped me once."

"Why, what for?"

"Paul was little. We were at the hospital. At the time we didn't know he had a problem with some brain functions. We just thought, well we thought he was, well you know. I got hysterical. I was crying and in a real panic. That's when Jeremy held me and took his right hand. He used two fingers and snipped me on the cheek. It sort of brought me around I guess. You know I bet he's probably apologized for that a million times. It didn't even hurt, just surprised me back into reality."

"That was all?"

"That was the only time."

"Wow."

"Jeremy's seen a lot. It affected him."

"What was wrong with Paul?"

"There was something wrong with his brain waves. They had to open his skull and put a plate between his right and left lobes. After that he was pretty much OK."

"Pretty much?"

"He needed physical therapy, and later through the primary grades he needed extra help. That's what I did. He' still a little backward about some things even now."

"Like what?"

"Girls mostly."

Allyson paused, but only for a second, "Don't tell me he doesn't like girls. I know that's not true."

Half alarmed, Audra looked up, "He hasn't tried to take advantage of you?"

"Oh no, not Paul." Allyson thought about telling Paul's mom about what her boys almost did the first day she was ever at their house. She decided to keep it her secret, "Paul's a gentleman."

Audra suspected Allyson was holding something back, but decided not to pursue it, "Before you came along he seldom dated, and almost never talked about girls. Sure he dated Lauren some, but hardly any other girls. Lauren has been a sister more than anything else. He's spent most of his time studying and in sports."

"He's a Boy Scout."

"Yes he is." Audra lathered up Allyson's hair with shampoo. She took down the adjustable water nozzle and rinsed it out.

"Did Paul talk about me any?"

A little at first; then after Lauren and I visited Hannah. You remember?"

Allyson nodded, "I remember."

"Well then he spelled everything out for us. I thought he was confused at first. Later things became more clear; from then on he wouldn't shut up. It was Allyson this and Allyson that."

"He says he loves me."

Audra, finished with the woman's hair, took her hand and wiped Allyson's tear stained face, "I'll let you clean your front."

Allyson wanted something, "He said he loves me."

"I heard you. I think there's something about you he finds special. I mean I see it too. You are special."

Allyson didn't say anything for several seconds. Then she replied, "I would never do anything to hurt him."

Audra touched the back of the woman's head. She took a brush and slowly combed the knots out of the young woman's still wet hair. She said, "I like your hair." She took a hand and gently rubbed down the back of Allyson's neck, "I know you wouldn't."

Allyson allowed herself to indolently bask in the warmth of the tub and the older woman's attentions. Then she startled Audra, "I was a foster child."

"Really?"

"I stayed in seven different homes, not to mention the times I spent in state run dormitories."

"That must have been hard."

"I never had a real home; nothing like what you have here."

Audra sat down on the tiled floor of the bathroom. At eye level she said, "You have one now."

Allyson took a washcloth and let some of the now cooling water to trickle down her chest, "I have small boobs."

"You have nice breasts, and you're very pretty."

Allyson looked at Audra and smiled softly, "No I'm not, not really."

"You have beautiful eyes, and a very warm heart." Allyson felt like bragging just a little, "Did you know I maxed out my S.A.T.'s, and I got a straight 4.00 in college."

Audra wasn't exactly sure the younger woman was being completely honest. "Those are some pretty high numbers." She asked, "Where did you go to school?"

"I got a full scholarship to the University of Pennsylvania."

"Penn State?"

"No the University of Pennsylvania; It's in Philadelphia."

"That's impressive. You're sure your not exaggerating just a little?"

"No. I really did. How did Paul do?"

Audra could tell the little girl was coming out, "He didn't do that well. What was your major?"

"I wanted to study medicine, but John, Mr. Bennett, persuaded me to major in English Literature."

"That's a switch."

"Yeah, I know."

Audra changed the subject, "You cried the other night. In those foster homes, were you beaten much?"

Allyson stiffened, "No, not beaten exactly, just well, mostly ignored; sometimes the men tried to make me do things."

"Did you?" She hesitated, "Do things?"

"I didn't want to but sometimes I had to. One man kept putting my head under water in the toilet. I never let anyone touch me down there though." She pointed to her vagina.

"I'm sorry Allyson. I wish I could erase those things from your memory. I can't though." She leaned forward and kissed her on her cheek. Then she smiled, "Tell you what I can do. I can guarantee as long as you're here no one will ever hurt you." She watched as the young woman first shifted away from her kiss, then lean back toward her again. Then Audra did something very uncharacteristic. She took the younger woman's face in her two hands, turned it toward her, and kissed her again, first on the forehead, and then on the end of the nose, "Allyson I want you to stay here with us. Even if you break Paul's heart I want you to stay. I want you to stay and be my daughter."

Allyson was tired. Her back was sore. She felt weak. The medicine was wearing off and she felt increasingly achy and sore. Mrs. Hanson had made her an offer she'd heard before. When she was little other women had said the self same thing several times. She believed it then at first; later she knew they meant it but only up to a point. It was funny. She felt this time Paul's mom really and truly meant every word. Allyson's head dropped to her chin. She started to cry, not just tears, but she really started to cry, big heart felt sobs, heavy heaving breathy sighs, and tears, big tears. She looked around, crying, all pretense, all adult subterfuge gone. A little girl, a sad lonely little girl looked over at an older woman. Tearfully she whimpered, "Don't say it if you don't really mean it."

Audra started to cry too. She took her hands and wrapped them around the young woman's head, careful not to touch or hurt her back, "I mean it Allyson. I really do."

Audra helped the younger woman up and out of the tub. She held up a big soft towel, "You now what. You lay back down a while. I'll go get the clothes Ariel and Lauren bought for you. We're going to dress you up for Thanksgiving dinner."

Allyson was so tired, "Do I have to go downstairs?"

"You rest up first. We'll salve your back up real good. We'll get some more medicine in you. A little later you'll feel better. We'll dress you up for dinner. You won't have to stay long, but I know everyone will want to see you. My mom and dad, and one of my brothers are coming a little later. They'll want to meet you." She took two fingers and lifted Allyson's chin, "Hey you're going to love my mom and dad. They're the greatest."

Alyson started crying again.

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Around 1:00 Jeremy got a call from his brother-in-law Scottie. He and his brood along with Audra's mom and dad were going to eat Thanksgiving dinner with Jeremy and Audra. They'd already cooked their bird and decided to cut it up for the big gathering on Sunday. Scottie said he and his wife were bringing several pies, so not to worry about dessert. Jeremy thanked him for the call, and hung up.

Jeremy called up to Audra and told her Scott and everyone was coming. Audra was doubly pleased. Allyson could eat with a much larger group. If she got too tired she'd get Paul to help her upstairs. It made sense. It looked promising.

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Audra helped Allyson back into the bedroom, "Now you wait right here. I'll be right back."

Allyson looked puzzled, "Where are you going?" Internally she was thinking, 'where would I go?'

Audra skipped down the hall, rummaged around in her bureau and skipped back as fast as she could, "Let's make you up for dinner."

Allyson looked at the older woman in wide wonder, "I don't..."

"I know; we'll use my stuff." She proceeded to lay everything out on a chair beside the bed.

Allyson recognized the make ups as things older women generally used; not things a young woman like herself would customarily even consider, "Mrs. Hanson I don't think..."

"Let's do your hair up first." She got Allyson to turn around, sit on a small stool she'd brought in, and face a mirror.

"Audra I can do..."

"Oh please?"

Allyson realized she had no choice. She wondered had she exchanged being one person's toy, John, for being this older woman's plaything?

It was like Audra had read her mind, "I'm not trying to take you over. I'll never ask again. I just never got the chance before. Please?"

Allyson couldn't say no, "Well...this once I guess."

"Great!" Audra sat behind and started brushing her hair out. It was thick and came to just about shoulder length. Considering its color and texture she wished it was a lot longer. She imagined Allyson's hair usually ended up in pony or pig tails. Not today. She combed and combed, getting every single knot. Then she worked pulling back as tightly as she could. She coiled it into tight braids where she could, but mostly she worked it into a tight bun. Bun in place she set it with tiny bobby pins that, once in place, could barely be seen. She slipped around in front and with a household fork she pulled a few strands free of the bun so that it was allowed to fall freely around her face. She sat back, "What do you think?"