Blind Love, Reunited

Tuesday's lessons went well and Thursday's were even better. The kids were bright, and as far as teenagers go, they were good kids. Made even better by them supporting one another and being respectful to me the whole way. I wasn't expecting that. The rest of this semester I predicted would be pleasant. So long as I could keep my mind off of Pauline. She apparently had decided she wasn't going to make that part easy.

I was locking up the music room after lessons on Thursday when I got a distinct whiff of lavender. I stopped in my tracks. I asked, "Polly?"

I heard her voice, filled with apprehension, "Paul, um, I wanted to apologize for some of the things I said to you."

I said, "Don't worry about it. You never have to apologize for anything. Have a good evening, Polly." I put my cane out to correspond with the first step in walking away, but it struck her foot. She was blocking my way.

She said, "Well, I feel terrible about some of the things I said. What if I came by this Friday evening and made you dinner. We can talk."

Oh, crap. I responded, "Sorry, I have plans. I'm having dinner with my sister and her family."

That seemed to spark her up, she said, "Really? Does Eva live around here? Is she still married to Rick?"

"Um, yeah. Both counts."

"I always liked her. She was always so nice to me. And her kids were just the cutest things ever. Shoot, they have to be teenagers by now."

"Yeah. They're good kids though. The whole family is doing well."

She hesitated, then said, "Well, I'm glad they're good. Parents?"

"Doing well."

"Great. Just one thing though. You lied to me about Friday. I'll be at your place at six. I'll bring all the food and a bottle of red, so you don't have to do a thing. See you then." I just stood there, dumbfounded. Listening to the click-clack of her heels go down the hall and fade into the distance. All the while running an old memory through my mind of her hips swaying as she teased me while walking away, looking back over her shoulder with a smirk on her face, knowing that she had me hooked and there was nothing I could do about it.

* O~>

I spent all Friday arguing with myself. The irrational side of my being won out. I wasn't going to let her in.

This was all just too much. On Monday I would call Mrs. Williams and resign. It would be a shame to let the kids down, but I had to put an end to these 'encounters' with Polly. I didn't want to have to move, I really loved my apartment, but if I started running into her around the neighborhood too, I'd find another place. I had to shake my head at that thought as I realized just how irrational I was thinking at that moment.

When someone knocked on the door, I sat on my couch frozen. Wondering how long it would take before she gave up and went away. Muffled by the door, I heard her say, "C'mon, Paul. Open up." She knocked on the door, louder this time.

After a few moments, I heard her say, "Fine!" I let out a big breath, thinking that she didn't last as long as I thought she would. Maybe she's less stubborn than she used to be. Then I heard a key in the lock and the door open.

I stammered at her, "How...."

She said in a know-it-all tone, "You keep the spare key in the same place we used to hide it at our old apartment. That's actually cute." Then I sensed her move through the room, passing me and going into the kitchen, placing bags on the counter.

She called out from the kitchen, "Hey, I'm going to start on dinner right now and have a glass of wine while I do it. Come join me, willya?"

As I entered the kitchen, she asked, "Can you open a bottle of wine by yourself or do you need help?" I refused to answer that, I just went to the drawer with the corkscrew and opened the bottle that she placed in my hand. I even poured us each a glass like a big boy, all by myself.

I sat at a stool at the kitchen island counter, opposite where Polly was rummaging through my cabinets and drawers, familiarizing herself with my kitchen. She started complaining immediately, "Jeezus, Paul. Do you cook in here at all? What do you even eat? Oh... I see now. You have 10 cans of mini ravioli. Ah, and sandwich bread and peanut butter. Seriously? You live on this shit?"

I was embarrassed, making it worse by saying, "I have sliced ham and cheese in the fridge. Did you forget that I like sandwiches? There's nothing wrong with that."

She didn't comment on that, she said, "At least I found a saucepan. I can work with that. Glad I wasn't going to bake anything, you don't have anything in this kitchen."

I could hear her move around the kitchen and my mind went to another time, remembering her in our apartment kitchen while she cooked for us. She was a great cook, and she always looked beautiful doing it. She looked even better on weekend mornings when she would make breakfast, wearing only a tee shirt. She'd reach up into the cabinets, her bare ass on full display. She'd just grin at me when she'd catch me looking, knowing that the show she put on for me was one of my favorite things.

I suddenly realized she was talking, "Hey! Snap out of it." Satisfied she had my attention again, she said, "I'm going to make a simple stir fry, I've already chopped some chicken and all the veggies. The rice won't take long at all, so we'll be eating in no time. I've pre-made a salad and you'll have a nice, healthy dinner for a change. We'll talk while I throw this all together, OK?" It wasn't really a question though.

She went on, "I've already apologized for what I said to you last time I was here, and I'm also sorry for the dirty trick I pulled on you. Seeing you on the floor crying, though. Well. I can't shake that image. In all the years we were together, I never saw you cry. You were so confident at all times, nothing could ever shake you. You were the most put-together person I knew. But you weren't a shithead about it. You weren't the kind of guy to do everything for me like I was helpless, we did things together, and you would boost my confidence and push me to be a better person. You always made me feel worthwhile. That left such a hole in my psyche when you dumped me. It took me years to re-think myself, to believe that I had self-worth again." I could sense her getting angry again.

She composed herself and continued, "So, yeah, I'm sorry for what I said to you, but the fact doesn't change that I'm still angry at you. And I will never forgive you for that. For ten years I've been angry that you dumped me for what I thought was one of those tall, fake-tit blondes that sniff around the golfers during tournaments. We talked every day on the phone while you were touring that summer, and you would talk to me like I was the only woman in the world. I know that you loved me. There was no doubt in my mind. Then you fucking dumped me like a dirty dish rag, blocking my calls like I was a tramp. Even your sister wouldn't tell me anything and I had believed she was a close, personal friend.

"Now, fast forward, I learn the truth. And that is even fucking worse. You were going through a major, life altering crisis, and you didn't reach out to me. How could you do that? I will never, ever forgive you for that."

She sighed heavily, drank some wine, and continued. "When I overheard you tell Beverly that you had planned asking me to marry you, I went insane. In your heart, you know damn well that I would have married you in an instant. And that part in our vows that reads 'through sickness and in health, until death do us part', well I would have lived that. Religiously, and right now, we'd be surrounded with children that we made together. With love. You being blind wouldn't have mattered, just a simple footnote to our love story, overcoming every obstacle with me at your side."

I heard a plate pushed in front of me and she said flatly, "Eat." I was not even close to being hungry but I forced myself to eat.

When I felt that I had enough to eat, at least enough that wouldn't make Polly get any angrier with me, I told her, "Polly. You have to believe me. You deserved better. I did it for you."

She sighed heavily again, then took a deep gulp of wine. I could hear the dishes being rinsed off in the sink. "Of course you did, Paul. I know that. In fact, I'm not even surprised at you. In your head you really believe that. My noble man, making the deepest of sacrifices in my best interests. Oh, Paul. What a fucking waste."

I pleaded with her, "Polly, try and understand. You deserved better. A disabled man couldn't give you what you have with your husband. And what about your daughter? Eva told me a while ago that you got everything you wanted in life."

She got angry again, "What I wanted in life was you, Paul. You idiot." She paused, and more calmly said, "About my daughter. We haven't talked about her yet. She's the light of my life. I'd like you to meet her."

I had to ask, "I don't understand. Why?"

She responded sheepishly, "I don't know. I remember how you were with your sister's kids, I'd like to see you around one again. That and it is a pretty big step with us reconnecting."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I asked, "Are you crazy? I bet your husband is just going to love all that. Look, this is hard enough on both of us, don't make it even harder, OK?"

She stood in front of me, I could smell the lavender right under my nose and she took my hands in hers, squeezing them and kneading them. She asked softly, "What's missing, Paul?"

At first I didn't understand, and then it hit me. "You're not wearing a wedding ring."

"That's right, Paul. I've been a divorced woman for a few years now."

"Oh, no. Oh, Polly... why?"

"Let's save that for another time, we don't have to talk about that now. It's alright though. I'm fine with that." She was still holding my hands. "What do you think about your genius plan now, Mr. Manipulator?"

I was still in shock. Speechless.

After all of the anger and confrontational tone, she now spoke in the beautiful, melodious voice that I remembered from when we were an item. She said, "I've been watching you from a distance whenever I could. Silly, I know. Whenever I'd get too close, you seemed to know somehow."

I whispered, "Lavender."

"Oh, right. My shampoo and body lotion. I still use the same stuff." I could picture her smiling, I just knew she was. "So I would watch you from a distance, and so many really great memories came back to me. And dammit, you look good. The years have been very good to you, mister. I mean, I'm still angry with you, but... but, I'm even more angry with myself. I was so hurt back then, but I still should have tried to find you. Fought for you."

She moved in closer, letting go of my hands but putting hers on my waist. "Paul, I'm not the same person I was when I was 23. Likewise, you aren't the same person you were when you were 24. A lot of water has gone under our bridges in ten years. That doesn't change the fact that I still love you. I've never stopped loving you. Even when I hated you at the same time, I still wanted you to come back. When I got married, standing at the altar, right up until the point where I said, 'I do,' I was hoping you'd burst through the chapel doors and take me away."

I said weakly, "Polly, stop this. You don't know what a burden I am to, well, everyone who knows me."

She said, "All I'm asking is for us to get to know one another again. Is that too much?"

I shook my head. I was so close to her, I wanted to reach in, pull her to me and hold her tight, kiss her. I put my hands on her waist, matching hers, but resisted what I was thinking.

She said softly, "The first thing you need to know about the older me is that I don't have that hard body you remember. I could use to lose 15 pounds, um, maybe a little more." Then she took my hands and moved them from her waist to her butt, pausing there before guiding them to her tummy. She was the last woman I had ever touched, and now I was feeling her body again. She then took my hands and had me cup her breasts. She made a small giggle and said, "These got a little bigger though, what do you think?"

That pushed me over the edge, I couldn't take it anymore. I reached around her waist and pulled her tight into my body, somehow managing to say, "You feel awesome" and then I found her lips with mine and kissed her. Deeply. Years of pent up want and need, missing her for so long, I put every amount of emotion into that kiss. She kissed me back.

Eventually she pushed me away, breaking our kiss, she was panting. "Oh, god. Five more seconds of that and I'd rip off my clothes and ravage you here right on the floor."

I was going to ask for five more seconds, no, beg actually. Then I came to my senses and knew I had to protect her from herself. "Polly, I think you should go."

She sighed and said, "You don't want me to go and you know it."

"Pauline. Please."

She chuckled, then sighed. "You only ever called me Pauline when you got frustrated. OK, I'll leave. I just have to do something first."

I heard her moving away from me and then the scrape of something, maybe the coffee table, across the floor. Then another scrape, a little further away.

I called out, "What are you doing?"

She responded from the other side of the room, "Slowing you down." I took two steps forward and smacked my shin against the coffee table. She was heading for my bedroom and I had to go slow in following her as she had moved a chair and an end table too, I didn't have my cane in hand.

I finally made it to my room and I heard a gasp from her. I knew what that was all about. "So. Mrs. Williams told you what I had hidden in my sock drawer."

She responded, "It's beautiful, Paul," and then her lips were on mine, her arms around my neck. I kissed back for a moment until I remembered how I had nearly lost control a few minutes earlier. I broke the kiss and she stepped back, putting what I knew was the engagement ring box into my hand. "Don't lose this," she said breathlessly, "you never know when you might need it again."

I heard her exit my bedroom and move the furniture back (I hoped) into place. She called out from the front door, "See you at school, handsome." Then she was gone.

* O~>

I got to the music room just before the final bell rang as part of my habit to avoid being in the hallways when jammed with students. I exchanged some pleasantries with the music teacher, but she didn't stay long, I think I made her uncomfortable.

I was waiting for my students when I detected a slight scent of coconut and tropical fragrances. I asked out, "Hello?"

"Ha. I got you." It was Polly. "I changed my shampoo and body lotion to see if I could throw you off. You didn't know it was me, did you?"

That made me smile for some reason, "Nope. You got me."

"Don't you worry, I'll go back to my usual. I was just having fun with you."

I teased back, "Well you haven't changed all that much. You're still a stinker."

After an uncomfortable pause in our exchange, she said, "Do you have plans this weekend? I could drop by. You could meet my daughter and we could all have lunch."

I thought quickly, "Sorry, I'm busy all weekend. My sister is having coffee with me on Saturday, then taking me shopping, and I'm hanging out with my nephew on Sunday." Glad that I didn't have to lie to get out of it.

I must have taken her by surprise, "Oh, OK. Maybe some other time then."

What I couldn't tell her was that I would drop everything and just hold her all weekend. It just wasn't right. I hadn't been able to stop thinking about her, my arms around her and that kiss was replayed over and over again since she left my apartment.

I heard a voice from behind her as one of my students came into the room, "Hi, Miss Striker. I didn't expect to see you here."

Pauline replied to him, "Hello, Mr. Banyun. I was just saying 'hello' to Mr. Stiggers here. How are you doing on your science fair project? Think you can pull off a repeat of your win from last year."

He replied, sounding a little sullen, "Oh, I don't know. I got a look at what Veronica Camacho is building and she's really bringing her game this year."

"Yeah, she's a smart kid, but I know you'll do your best," she said, then, "OK, your other students are here, Mr. Stiggers. I'll get out of your way and let your lessons begin. See you later." With that last statement I heard her groan, with a little exasperated, "Ohhhh," as she realized what she had said.

I smiled at where I thought she was standing, "Bye now, Miss Striker."

* O~>

Mid-morning on Saturday, my door buzzed so I went to answer it, throwing open the door a little too enthusiastically. I always enjoyed visiting with my sister. "Hello, sis," I said.

Then a little squeaky voice said quietly in front of me, "Mommy. Why did he call you sis?"

I was taken by surprise, but I knew in an instant. Just knew. I heard Polly reply, "He thought I was someone else, honey. He was expecting his sister."

"Ohhhhhh," the squeaky little one replied in understanding.

I stuttered, "Polly, what are you doing here?"

The squeaky voice then asked, "Mommy. Why did he call you Polly?"

Her mother said, first to her little girl, "This is an old friend and that's what he used to call me," and then to me, "Hello, Paul. We are officially crashing your coffee date with your sister. I hope you don't mind. First I would like you to meet my daughter, Alice. Alice, meet Mr. Paul."

I was still taken aback but managed, "Hello, Alice. Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too, Mr. Paul."

After a long pause, Polly said, "Well, are you going to invite us in, Mister Paul?" cheekily drawing out my name. I couldn't see her, but I could picture her with a face splitting grin that I was confident she was sporting when she asked.

I answered by stepping aside and allowing them to pass through. I led them to the kitchen and asked if Alice and Polly wanted some orange juice and coffee respectively, which they both politely agreed to. I was a little nervous, so I surely appeared clumsy as I pulled out a mug and a cup and poured.

Just then the door buzzed again. Polly said, "I'll get it," and I heard two pair of feet bustle out of the kitchen toward the foyer (that was actually my living and family room). What I heard then took me all the way back to high school, the sound of two girls shrieking at each other in delight. That was immediately followed by two women talking excitedly with simultaneous, "How are you?", "You look great," "God, it's been a long time," "I missed you." Pauline introduced Eva to Alice and another round of excited talk went on before they all joined me in the kitchen where I had waited on a barstool at the island (which was also my breakfast table and formal dining room table, so it's not hard to guess, my apartment was real small).

I poured Eva a coffee while she said, "Pauline, I'm so sorry about what happened back then. I tried to talk this stupid-head out of it, but he threatened some really awful stuff if I, Mom or Dad tried to stop his dumbass scheme."

Polly replied, "It's not your fault, Eva. It's just that I had gotten so close to you and your family that it just made it hurt even worse. I looked at you as my own sister."

I could feel the evil eye on me from the two women before Eva scolded me for the millionth time, "Oh, Paul. Why did you have to go and do that?! Dammit." She then started talking to Polly like I wasn't even in the room. "Pauline, you should have seen him after he lost his sight. He got so depressed; he just wasn't the same guy. In some ways I really thought you were lucky that he cast you away to spare you from his pit of despair. He moved in with me and Rick and the kids, but it took him years to snap out of it. Even now, he's not the same guy that you would recognize. One thing I never figured out was what he misses more, you or his sight."