Breaking a God out of Vegan Jail

We had opened the suitcase our Hiver backers had given us soon after we arrived at our room. It gave off a low hum that somehow acted as a password to the encrypted safe bolted to the floor of the room. There was not much there- Some tee-shirts with the Hiver’s corporate logo on it, Name tags, pens with their logo. The only drones in it were low tech flyers armed with tee-shirt cannons. “Hi, would you like to be an example of the future of Hiver-K’kree relations?” The drone asked in a cute, friendly, mechanical voice. “This is a self-dressing tee-shirt. Smart fibers and micro motors in the fabric let the shirt slip onto you without any effort on your part. Have a nice day.”

The Hivers had sent Jack and I to act as their representatives. After the last war between the two races, they never interacted with each other directly. There was too much mutual distrust. As humans we were considered a neutral third party.

The whole idea was foolish at best. Jack was expected to do most of the talking while I stood there in a bikini. Jack couldn’t speak the K’kree language, while I could. Jack was an expert on robotics, I had a pair of PhDs in linguistics and xenobiology but the only thing the recruiter had cared about was my pair of D cups. Of course, the K’kree had no interest in human women. Most of them would likely not even be able to tell the difference between a human male or female.

I had checked into it before we left, assuming some sexist pig of a man had made the decision, it turned out the Hivers had used an AI for their marketing strategy. The AI had found that on the human populated world where they got their marketing data, having a human female with D cups in a pink bikini standing next to their droids had sold far more robots than any other strategy.

The K’kree were militant vegan centaurs. They had waged a genocidal war against carnivores that had lasted centuries and swept across hundreds of worlds. They abhorred meat and anything that ate meat, feeling that it reminded them of death and decay.

The Hivers were some of the smartest Sophonts in known space. With six manipulative tentacles and six eye stalks, they looked somewhat like a starfish. Unfortunately, they had the moral compass of unsupervised 13 year olds.

The Hivers had finally defeated the K’kree empire decades ago by secretly feeding the K’kree dead K’kree warriors mixed in with their food. It was such a taboo the K’kree had called off the war and retreated a few parsecs away, inviting humans to settle the worlds in between as a sort of buffer.

The robot, drone, and droid trade show started the next day. We had assumed the safe would be filled with examples of the latest models of Hiver manufactured drones. “Whatever.” I shrugged wondering how we would sell the K’kree on the latest high tech Hiver drones if we didn’t even have examples ”Let’s get few drinks on our corporate tab before calling it a night.”

We woke up the next morning to the smell of bacon.

We were able to find 17 separate objects in just the domicile we were staying in, that reeking of bacon. All of them had been manufactured from the same corporation. We started to understand what a problem it was when we realized the corporation manufactured everything from cloths to home building material to advanced robots and electronics to spaceship components. Every product they had manufactured at any point in the last decade all started reeking of bacon at the same time, on the same day. Based on the news reports, this was happening on at least 15 other worlds.

The corporation headquarters was based on a human world, but I knew it owned by the same Hiver controlled front company that had hired Jack and I. “This was clearly the work of the Hivers, it was not an accident.” Jack whispered to me, worry clear on his brow.

Being on a K’kree world I knew at once this was going to be a problem but I did not foresee at the time how big a problem it would become. Everything smelled of bacon. It was not the best way to start a trade mission, but Jack and I had gone through worse. The Hivers were paying us good credits to represent them and their business interests. Our mission was part of some larger plan, in the words of our Hiver backers “to get as much as possible from the K’kree with as low or no cost.”

Within half an hour we had been able to buy up most of the worker drones and other robots being sold by our competitors cheap. The K’kree wanted them gone given that they now reeked of death. Then the public alarm system came on and the K’kree went from being upset and skittish to outright insane. I watched K’kree throwing themselves through the glass windows of the pavilion in an effort to get outside as quickly as possible.

Outside was pure pandemonium. K’kree were running naked through the streets in blind panic, their horse like fear-shits piled everywhere in great clusters. They had ripped their bacon smelling clothes off in an effort to escape the smell. Most of them were screaming in terror.

I was not wearing much more. Trying to move at a quick pace in a bikini top and high heels is not easy at the best of times. Trying to do it in what was quickly becoming a war zone was impossible.

I watched in horror as one of the tee-shirt drones we had brought with us flew low over the crowd. “Hi, Would you like to be an example of the future of Hiver-K’kree relations?” its friendly voice asked before firing a bacon scented smart tee-shirt directly into the face of some frightened K’kree. It immediately tried to crawl onto her. The K’kree screamed as she tried to claw it off. The shirt started wrapping itself around her wrist, clinging to her with what appeared to be considerable strength as she fought it off unsuccessfully. “Have a nice day.” The drone cheerfully added before flying on to its next victim.

I ran to her aid. “Maybe we can help each other.” I tried to explain trying to pull the smart shirt off her. The bikini top was not a bra, it offered no support to my breasts, I was bouncing with every step. A tee shirt would not be much better but at least I would be covered. For a split second most of the shirt twisted its self around me, latching onto what little I was wearing. I just exhaled a sigh of relief when suddenly the K’kree woman bolted, smart shirt still clinging to her wrist. And… I was naked.

Naked in a pair of high heel shoes on a strange world. Naked in the middle of the street with buildings on fire on both sides of the road. Naked in front of a man I barely knew. Naked in front of hundreds of pairs of alien eyes. Naked and terribly scared. I started crying. I could feel the big hot ugly tears slowly running down my cheeks.

I felt Jack’s dress shirt slide over my bare shoulders. It still had his body heat which felt so good over my goose bumped flesh in the cool morning air. It smelled of his cologne, his manly scent, and of course the ever present bacon. “Thanks” I muttered as slipped into the shirt. I watched him, Jack politely looked the other way as I dressed. He could have tried to sneak a peek but instead had respected my boundaries and personal space.

The K’kree communication differed greatly from humans. Where humans use sound alone, K’kree communication used both sound and smell. Once the public alert system had switched on it had turned into a disaster as the non-verbal pheromone base system had been produced by the same corporation as everything else that reeked of bacon. At the moment the system was pumping the stench of bacon directly into every part of the city. The bacon stink was so intense it drowned out the smell of anything else. In human terms it would be the equivalent of a public address message stating “Warning the city is under attack by scary monsters. To stay safe go at once to…” and then just have monsters howling so loudly it drowns out every other sound.

“Computer! Directions to the nearest police station.” Jack asked his smart phone.
“Every police station with 40 minutes walking distance is currently on fire.” The phone replied in its cute, friendly, mechanical voice. “Would you like directions to the nearest restaurant selling bacon?”

We both looked at his phone. It was made by the same corporation that had made everything that reeked of bacon.

“Computer! What is the most fortified building in walking distance?” I asked.

“Bacon!” The computer replied. “Bacon! Bacon! Bacon!”

‘K’kree are mass murdering bigots. The central bank is currently eight minutes walking distance and the prison is on the way to the star port. Glykon knows the way. Follow Glykon to riches and safety.’

‘The central bank is currently eight minutes walking distance and the prison is on the way to the star port.’ Jake and I both said it at once.

“I don’t know why I said that, it just popped into my head.” Jake looked at me.

“Same. That was weird. And the central bank is eight minutes away.” I looked at the smart phone. I had never been to this world before. I suddenly just knew where the bank and prison were. We both had.

By mid-morning, a few of the K’kree were attacking us on sight as we made our way to the central bank, but for the most part even their military was fleeing at the mere sight of us. The tee-shirt firing drones easily forced the K’kree to retreat, they didn’t like getting hit with a flying tee-shirt that reeked of death. The central bank was the strongest complex of buildings in the city plus the vaults would full of credits. By this time the bacon smell was on everything. There was no other odor or smell or pheromone-Just the overwhelming smell of bacon.

The bank was abandoned, the vault doors wide open. We quickly set the small army of drones we had purchased to work stealing everything. It felt wrong on one level at the same time, the K’kree were mass murdering bigots.

I listened to the voice in my head as I watched the drones carry out their task. ‘Do you want to have sex with him? You masturbated to thoughts of him on the ship. He’s done the same thinking about you. You haven’t had sex with a partner in six months. You haven’t had sex with a good partner in over two years. Wouldn’t to be fun to find out how thick and veining his shaft is? Glykon knows what your pussy wants and your pussy wants to know what that man feels like. He wants to bend you over that desk over there and fuck you senseless, he is thinking about it right now. He knows about the cucumber incident.’ I could feel it in my mind, Jack’s thoughts of grabbing my hair as he pounded me against the desk.

Jack broke the silence. “Is it in your mind too? Something calling itself Glykon.”

“Yep.” I gave Jack a hard look. I was not sure how he thought things were going to go but there was no way I was consenting to sex right here and now. I started counting the reasons, because we were in the middle of robbing a bank, because I hardly knew him, because some alien in my mind without consent was telling me to, because he didn’t have a rubber and I was buck naked without his shirt.

I started running all the scenarios in my mind, weighting options. Jack was bigger than I was. There was zero chance I could outrun in him in heels. Jack had not acted entitled so far but men had acted nice until told no before, then the real personality came out. There were no police coming to help me. We had had no problem committing crimes like entering a bank vault without permission. What was stopping him from entering me without permission. My heart was racing.

“This is a stun stick. If it gets to me and I try something stupid. Please zap me.” Jack placed the metal tube on the desk. The one he was actively thinking of fucking me over. He walked to the far end of the room. As far from me was possible while staying in my line of sight. He was also actively thinking about how scared I currently was of him, of what he could do. He was trying to make sure I was safe and knew I was safe.

We were in each other minds. It was like two mirrors facing each other. So he knew I was worried about creating a visible wet spot in his shirt as well as how scared I was of him trying to prey on me. I also knew he saw us as partners in this together. While at the same time wanted to rough fuck me in part because he was intimidated of me for being smarter than him.

By noon, it was as if the deep parts of their brains, the part that controls fear had shorted out. Some of the K’kree had killed themselves. A few that appeared to be members of the K’kree military were shooting at each other. K’kree need to be in a herd, the herd is safety. That behavior is hardwired deep in every K’kree mind. At that same time, flee from or attack anything that reeks of predators is also hardwired deep in their minds. Now the K’kree themselves reeked of predators.

It was as Jack and I fled the complex, our small army of drones we had purchased weighted down by loot sacks close behind us that I finally started to see just how insidious the Hiver plan had been. Everywhere in the city, the streets were empty. In the distance I could see individual K’kree running naked across the snow covered fields into the woods. This was a high tech world in which food and shelter were normally provided by drones. It was hard to imagine how any of them would have the skills needed survive the night in the freezing cold.

The Hivers had not been trying to steal something from this world, they were trying to steal the world itself without damaging anything.

“Remember all those Humans and Vargr passengers and crew in low berths from that ship that got impounded. The one with the giant telepathic snake. We might as well set them free while we’re at down port awaiting pick up.” Jack shouted to me as we ran.

“Let’s swing by the prison on the way. Maybe we’ll meet new people. I have this feeling that waiting for the Hivers to pick us up might not be the best idea given we are the sole eyewitnesses to what appears to be the genocide they have carried out.” I replied.

“Plus we need to break Glykon the God King out of prison. Cell block 3, row 19.” We both said together. We would get credits and a ship, in exchange the God King would be free once more.

“Yeah, we need to be long gone when they get here.” Jack typed something into the comm. “I think we have about 22 hours before we need to be either jumped or in route to the jump point. Let’s hope we run into someone with the skill sets needed to fly that impounded ship.” I checked out his butt. Once we got to jump space, I knew I would be spending the rest of the trip sharing his bed but it would be my choice made by me because I wanted it.