Can You Believe We Did That?

Brandy came down about an hour before dinner to help finish up. She apologized and told me she loved me, Michael, and Alisa, but couldn't promise she'd be ready any time soon to try again. I'm sure I heard her talking with her mom when I went up to check on her a couple times but didn't intrude. What she'd told me confirmed my thoughts. I was wishing hard I hadn't pressed her...

Dinner had turned out good, but was not all that joyful if I'm being honest. After we'd finished and had cleaned up, we watched "It's a Wonderful Life," and I ended up dozing off near the end, though I got to hear Clarence got his wings. We retired to bed shortly after the movie, and Brandy apologized again. I assure her she had nothing to apologize for.

Before falling asleep, I wondered if my blunder to push the idea of trying again would be one of those, 'Can you believe Megan wanted me to do that?!' moments.

December 31st, 8:12 p.m.

The week leading up to New Year's had been more of the same between us--a little tense, a lot of focus by each of us to be overly aware of the others feelings, and there was absolutely no mention of trying IVF again.

My company was having a New Year's party I had turned in an RSVP for, but I tried to convince Brandy I'd be just as happy watching the clock tick into the New Year at home on our couch. It wasn't to be... And since we were going, I got us a room at the hotel so we wouldn't have to risk driving home under the influence or experience that from another driver on the roads after midnight.

Over the drone of a Bruno Mars song the DJ was playing, Brandy shouted in my ear, "I needed this, tonight..."

Her saying that surprised me and the quick kiss after she'd said that warmed my heart. We danced the song out and headed back to our table, but as we approached our table, one of my managers and his wife were getting up, and I asked what was up.

His wife, Bridgett, answered, "Our daughter just threw up all over the couch, and our son almost made it to the bathroom before hurling his pizza. The babysitter is freaking out a little and is worried she might be getting sick since they'd all eaten the pizza we had delivered."

"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that," Brandy said sympathetically.

"Yeah, me too," she said. "Was hoping to get a little more time away; it's been a while since we've gotten out like this. It's always something with kids, but most of it has been a pretty good experience. Well, maybe not the kids getting the chicken pox, and me catching it too. Who knew I hadn't had it as a kid."

It would be a lie to say I was prepared for the cringe question that was likely to come next, that being, 'Do you have kids?' Thankfully, it didn't, and they left after a few "Goodbyes..." delivered from around our table.

December 31st, 11:59 p.m. and fifty-eight, fifty-nine seconds...

"Happy New Year's!"

Brandy and I were already hugging and kissing as confetti, and the crowd whooped, howled, and blew into whistles or kazoos for easily a couple minutes into the New Year.

"I love you, Meg's," Brandy said into my ear, kissing my cheek afterwards.

"I love you too," I said in return, and kissed her again softly, with plenty of alcohol-lubricated want coursing through my veins.

I heard someone yell, "Get a room already!" and we separated a little embarrassed, and I looked around to find who'd made that comment. My cube mate Brendon had and I flipped him off, before Brandy surprised me by dipping me to kiss me again in front of the small group of my coworkers.

After I'd been righted, she said, "Let's go get some air."

We did a little wave to my coworkers, who'd applauded her skill for perfectly dipping me, and we exited the ballroom.

January 1st, 12:26 a.m.

We strolled the hotel grounds for a few minutes hand in hand, watching other revealers along the way, and were treated to random fireworks being set off from the marina. It wasn't the warmest of nights, so our stroll outside didn't last very long. Neither of our shoulder wraps offered much warmth, and our gowns materials were fairly light to begin with.

"You have a New Year's resolution?" Brandy asked.

"To be there for you always," I said, hugging her around the waist. "How about you?"

"The same, but I expected that would be yours, so I knew I'd need to come up with something else," she said slyly.

"Does that mean we're not going back to the party?" I asked with a little more exuberance than may have been called for. I was lusting for my wife, and I had but a single train of thought when I'd asked that.

"Think I'd like to be alone with my wife too," she said softly into my ear, kissing my neck and making me feel a little woozy.

She didn't have to ask me twice, and to make her request happen a little quicker, I placed a hand on her shoulder and took off my three-inch heels. I had been looking up at her all night by an inch, maybe two, and marveled at how I loved looking up into those light brown eyes of hers.

Alcohol? Nah, she was beautiful, and that gown had me lusting for what was beneath it something hard since she'd put it on!

January 1st, 12:34 a.m.

No sooner had the door to our room closed, I was being encouraged to sit on the bed. A gentle kiss that promised much more was given, and then I sensed something different in my wife, my lover. There was a confidence, a swagger, that badass woman who'd swept me off my feet and liked to take charge was back and standing before me.

It had been quite some time since we'd let loose, like really let loose, and I was going to take full advantage of this opportunity. I watched her unzip her dress, step out of it, still in her four-inch heels, lay the dress over a chair, and stand before me in just her bra and panties. I know my mouth dropped, and when she'd wagged a finger at me to stand, I hopped up eagerly and at that point it was 'game on'!

January 1st, 1:57 a.m.

The water cascading over our bodies, the steam of the shower, and her hands sensually caressing me were the perfect ending to a perfect session of love-making. There was no holding back tonight, and we'd both been rather vocal as one or the other of us was driving the other wild. We easily worked off months of sexual frustrations tonight.

Brandy's hands now on my small, yet perky breasts felt amazing, and her lips on my earlobe were beginning to drive me crazy again!

"I'd like to try again," she whispered softly in my ear.

I shuttered and reached around, got my hands on her ass, and pulled her in close.

"I'm happy to do that all over again..."

There was a moment I thought she hadn't heard me, but she said, "No, not that... Our New Year's resolution should be 'we' should try again."

Huh? Didn't we just... And as the realization of what she was actually saying hit home, I spun to face her, tears already streaming down both our faces, and I hugged her tightly while unabashedly bawling my eyes out.

Epilogue:

Trying again was a gamble we were willing to take together. Those first three months of the New Year involved plenty of doctor visits as they optimized Brandy's fertility drugs, egg retrieval, embryo development with Michael's sperm, and by mid-March everything fell into place for having the embryos placed in Brandy's uterus. Our doctor's confidence was high, which reassured us, but we were nervous through the wait and almost exactly two weeks to the day after insertion, we found out we were pregnant!

The news, while amazing and what we had hoped for, also brought on fear, stress, and worry. As the weeks slowly ticked by, Brandy did everything she was directed, and other than a minor spotting problem at week nine, we'd made it past the point where we'd lost Jennifer. At week twenty-two, Brandy felt our baby move for the first time. She hadn't experienced that with Jennifer, even though we'd seen evidence of her moving through ultrasounds two weeks before she passed.

Because we'd lost Jennifer, Brandy's doctor was treating her pregnancy as 'high risk', which was worrisome at first, but the attention given to her care did so much to calm our nerves throughout this journey. During a later ultrasound, we were asked if we wanted our doctor's opinion on the sex of our growing child within her.

"Your call; you're doing all the work," I said, remembering we hadn't known we were having a daughter last time until she'd passed.

Brandy took my hand, "You sure?"

I nodded, and she nodded to the doctor. There may have been a bit of crying going on after finding out. Of course, knowing we would now have time to decide on a name we liked was comforting.

On December 8th, at approximately 1:10 p.m., our six-pound, four-ounce daughter Michelle Alise was born. We named her in honor of my brother Michael and his wife Alisa, for the gift they'd provided us.

Both Brandy and Michelle were healthy and so freaking beautiful. The pregnancy experience had been everything Brandy had hoped for and I loved that she shared every thought and experience with me. Our experience proved love, resilience, and the determination of two strong and fiercely in love women could prevail.

It had been Brandy's New Year's resolution, given to me after arguably the most amazing night of giving of ourselves to one another, I will never forget. Our experience had absolutely lived up to our promise to make those moments we'd look back on where we'd think, "Can you believe we did that?"

FIN

Author's Note: Thank you for the read. This story was submitted for a contest dealing w/ a New Year's resolution and I'm sharing it here in a slightly modified state.

Don't be afraid to rate this story if it did anything for you (you don't have to have an account to do so, and there are no prizes for most 'Rates'). If you comment, I will reply directly to you (if you have an account) or in the comments if you're anonymous, so let's chat...

If there are problems or you have criticisms you'd like to share privately, feel free to message me; I'd love to address them if I can or fix those.

I'm trying to grow as a storyteller; I'm far from perfect, so any help is much appreciated. Thanks again for reading...

Rachel M. Moore