Catching Feelings Ch. 01

Jimmy was staring, and very much appreciating what he saw, but he looked up just as Jeremy looked over and their eyes met. Jimmy smiled shyly and leaned over as if to elbow Jeremy gently, but he slipped and they ended up face to face and shoulder to shoulder on the wall.

Jeremy took in a deep breath to try and steady himself, but it meant that he could smell Jimmy's cologne and his natural scent from the sweating that the dancing had caused, and it was intoxicating. He knew he was going to be really mad at himself later, but it was hard to think straight right now.

"You smell really good," he whispered, his eyes hooded with lust.

Jimmy didn't move, almost not trusting himself to be able to do so without further embarrassing himself. "So do you, but you came loaded for bear, as my grandpa would say. I seriously want to kiss you right now."

"I want that to, but if my recent exploits have taught me anything, it's that fucking with a straight boy is a bad idea," Jeremy admitted.

"Even a curious, mostly-straight boy?" Jimmy asked, almost petulant at the loss of his prize for the evening.

Jeremy nodded his head slowly. "Those are the worst, to be honest. They try you out, get their gay sex fill, and then they ride off into the sunset with their princess, and their gay tryst ends up broken hearted on the floor, crying their eyes out while everyone reminds them that they shouldn't have gone down that road."

Jimmy looked sympathetic, blinking slowly as he took that in. "I'm sorry someone has done that to you, Jeremy. I can behave, then. Judging from that bulge in your pants, though, you should probably get back in there and catch that octopus before he realizes he got tossed back in the first place."

With a sigh, Jeremy pushed off the wall and started to walk past Jimmy. He stopped just a little behind his back, and turned back towards him. "Jeremy Thayer. If that doesn't scare you away once you google it, and you're actually willing to consider what being gay means, then maybe come and talk to me later. I mean the whole thing, though. What gay sex is, what coming out would mean, all of it."

And with that, he disappeared back into the club. Leaning back against the wall, Jimmy couldn't help but feel regret at missing a chance with Jeremy, but it wasn't completely gone. He pulled out his phone and googled the name, reading through the top ten results slowly as his buzz wore off. He felt a profound sadness for this man, and he pushed off the wall with resolve.

Jeremy couldn't find the octopus, as Jimmy had called him. No doubt he was jamming one of his tentacles into some other hapless chap in the bathroom. It was hard to feel any regret for missing out on that, though, despite the condition Jimmy had called painful attention to. He heard a noise and looked up. Jimmy had just reentered the club, phone in hand. Jeremy braced himself; here it came.

Jimmy walked up to him and planted a sweet kiss directly on his lips, his hand on the back of Jeremy's neck gently to keep him close, in full view of the entire club and most of the offensive line, currently involved in a line dance on the dance floor. The display wasn't lost on most of them though, and when Jimmy pulled out of the kiss, Jeremy was looking at him in surprise, like he couldn't quite believe he had done that.

"I'm really hoping being bisexual isn't the instant case of leprosy it would have been in high school, but I'm not going to hide you. And I won't do to you what he did." Jimmy said, for his ears alone. Suddenly from behind them a cheer went up from the Football Jocks and Jimmy found himself hoisted in the air. He looked helplessly at Jeremy as the team carried him in a circle around the dance floor and then put him back on his feet, cheering the whole time.

Jeremy startled when he felt a hand on his shoulder, turning to see Chloe's concerned face. "Jesus, Chloe. You scared me."

"Uh huh, I'm sure," she said, speaking over the music. "Is this a straight boy we need to, I don't know, beat up or something?"

Jeremy looked back over where Jimmy was surrounded by his Football friends, and shook his head. "I don't know yet. I'm beginning to think I have a problem though."

"You have a type," she commented.

"I do," Jeremy agreed with her. "Is it bad that I'm kind of hoping he doesn't completely fit into that type?"

"Yes," she said without hesitation. "Because you hope that every time, and then look at what happens."

Jeremy sighed again. "Yeah, you're probably right. Would you two be okay if I just went home?"

Chloe pursed her lips. "I suppose so, but just make sure you're okay. I don't want you to get hurt."

Jeremy gave her a small smile and kissed her on the cheek before leaving the club and walking down the street to call an uber to take him back to his apartment. Chloe, though, took off her earrings and handed them to Ethan, who was trying to tell her to calm down, before she stormed over to where the Football Jocks were, getting right into the middle of their group where Jimmy was, fixing them all with a glare that could easily curdle milk.

"You," she said.

Jimmy, still kind of confused about what happened, looked around and spotted Chloe standing there, looking angry. He extricated himself from the group and stood up straight. "Me?" he asked stupidly.

"Yes, you," she growled, before turning her gaze to the other jocks. "And all of you, but you in particular. If you all are just fucking with my friend Jeremy, then know that I will find you all, and I will end you, and they will never find the bodies. You stupid football creeps have no idea what it's like to be openly gay in a group of people who hate you, and if you mess with him..."

"Alright, Chloe," Ethan said, grabbing her arm. "I think they get the point. Jer Bear will be fine, he's an adult, a grown man."

"Who tried to kill himself this summer," she growled at Ethan.

"I know," Ethan replied sadly.

Jimmy couldn't find a way to project his sincerity any better, but he reassured this tiny demoness as best he could. "I have no intention of hurting him. I'm not sure what these guys are up to, but I swear no harm will come to Jeremy because of me."

Chloe didn't say anything back, just grumbled in their direction as she grabbed the drink Ethan had been drinking, downed it, and stomped away. Ethan looked at Jimmy with a sympathetic look, but his expression changed as he looked at the rest of the group, making it clear he wasn't sure he was happy with the rest of the football team, before he walked after his friend.

Jeremy was amped up the entire way home, and quickly left the uber and went up the stairs to his fifth floor apartment, wanting to feel the burn of it to try and take his mind off of all of the things he was thinking. It worked for the way up the stairs, but not much past that.

That problem that Jimmy had pointed out certainly hadn't gone away, especially after he kissed Jeremy. It was all he was able to think about; the way his lips felt, the pressure of his hand behind his neck, and how close he had been, and how good Jimmy smelled. He pulled off his shirt and undid the belt around his waist before pulling his pants off and getting himself under the cold water of the shower. It would warm up, but the shock of the cold was good for him now. He had spent so much time trying to forget Jasper, and not use him for jerking off, and now rather than thinking about Jasper, he was thinking about Jimmy.

"Even the names both start with J," he groaned at himself, feeling stupid.

He leaned against the wall of the shower, letting the hot water flow off of his body, and let himself think about that kiss. Jimmy's lips had been soft and pillowy, and it didn't really take much for his thoughts to go from kisses to more. Pushing away the shame, he thought about what it would be like to have those lips wrapped around his cock, and he stroked himself to the fantasy, starting out slow but then moving faster, until he let out a groan and came all over the shower wall.

As he watched the water wash away the evidence, he put his head back on the shower wall and groaned. He was done for.

Jimmy left the club as well, gathering a few high fives on the way out the door and a "Braver than me, my man," from the Kicker that led him to believe there were probably more gay or bi jocks than most folks thought.

Jimmy had walked back to the truck and laid on the tailgate staring at the stars and thinking until the rest of the guys had decided to leave the club. By then he was sober and they weren't so he drove them back to campus and parked the truck carefully in the parking garage. After half-carrying his best friend back to his room, his buddy stopped him in the hallway and asked him rather sincerely how long he'd been gay. He shoved the idiot into his room and pondered that reaction the rest of the evening. He eventually managed to go to sleep.

~~~

Jeremy woke up early the next day to go to the swimming pool first thing, working out any lasting angst out in the water. It always felt great to slice through the water and to work his muscles. He loved the feeling of his muscles stretching into the correct positions for the strokes he was doing. He did that for an hour or so, before he had to get to class and thus finally dried himself off and changed into normal clothes after a long shower.

It meant he was walking across campus with wet hair, but it didn't even bother him with how warm it was. The breeze cooled him down as he walked, and now he was glad he didn't have time to dry off completely.

Jimmy woke up early to hit the gym. It was max day so he enjoyed the burn as he worked to get one more rep or five more pounds out of each set. When he was done, he felt like someone had replaced his arms and legs with cooked noodles and set them all on fire. He showered quickly and made his way to his first class of the day, still thinking of Jeremy and that kiss from last night.

Jeremy went into his math class, choosing a seat in the back row because he hated being called on, and waited for the teacher to come in, going through his phone. He looked up each time someone came into the room but didn't give much thought about any person who came into the room, at least until Jimmy walked in. At that point, he put his phone down and looked at him in surprise before looking back down and shutting his phone off. He had been checking social media for the guy, and didn't want him to know that.

Jimmy spotted Jeremy and inquired wordlessly if he could sit next to him, indicating the empty seat. He was fully prepared to leave the guy in peace and sit elsewhere, but he found that his heart skipped a beat as he waited for a response. Jeremy made a motion that invited him to sit down, making it clear he was okay with it. Jimmy smiled broadly and sat next to Jeremy, taking advantage of the time before class began to settle himself and get a notebook out. This was the class he had been struggling with and he had learned to take it more seriously.

Once he had everything to his satisfaction, he leaned over and passed Jeremy his number. "In case you wanted to chat later."

Jeremy took it from him, not able to hide the smile that came to his face. He opened his phone and wiped the apps away before adding the phone number, then he sent a text to Jimmy that simply stated, "And now you have mine."

They didn't say anything more as the teacher came in to start teaching the class, and by the notes that Jeremy took, it was clear that this type of class was fairly easy for him. Science and math had always come easily, in the same way swimming and soccer had. He was good at it, even if he didn't want to be in front of the class doing equations for everyone else.

Jimmy took more notes than he probably needed. The reading had been torture for him, because he had no concept of how any of this fit together. He was a bit of a gearhead, and learned best with his hands. This theory and abstract work was a little beyond him.

Jeremy kept glancing over at Jimmy and could see him struggling as they got to the end of class, and so he waited until the professor had dismissed them and most of the other people had started packing up. He packed up slower, waiting for more people to leave before he turned to Jimmy.

"If you, uh, need any help with this class," Jeremy said quietly, still unsure about all of this. "I could help you. Math classes are easy for me, and I've tutored before."

Jimmy looked up with real hope in his eyes. "Seriously?! That would be awesome! I suck at this so much. I can't get the abstract stuff down." Jimmy finished up the notes he had been taking before the professor erased the board, then slowly began packing up. "I don't have another class until this evening, and I'm starting to regret that it's max day," he said, stretching his tired muscles some.

"I can definitely make learning the abstract easier," Jeremy replied with a smile, leaving out that he also could likely help those muscles with a massage, because he did at least have some self control.

"Dude, you're literally a life saver!" Jimmy enthused.

Jeremy found he liked that kind of praise more than he would admit from him, as it left him feeling warm inside, and his heart was beating rapidly against his chest again. "Happy to help. We wouldn't want you benched again, would we?"

"Riding the Pine is no fun at all," Jimmy said, completely innocently.

"Just let me know when and where," Jeremy said with a chuckle. "The library is good, of course, and I have an apartment just off campus."

Jimmy's eyes sparkled at the mention of Jeremy's apartment, but he kept his lewd thoughts to himself. "I'm free until 4 today, or after 5:30," Jimmy said, "Anywhere that you think is acceptable is good for me."

Jeremy considered that for a moment, and then sent off a text to Jimmy's phone. "I sent you my address. Be there at 6pm, bring your books and notebook."

"Yes, sir!" Jimmy said enthusiastically, closing his bag and noticing that they were alone in the classroom. The next class in this room wasn't for another several hours.

Jeremy seemed to notice it at the same time, looking around at the empty classroom before turning his eyes back to Jimmy's once he got his bag around his shoulder.

Jimmy hesitated to leave, now that he realized they were alone. "I've been thinking real hard about that kiss. And what your friend Chloe said afterward," he blurted out, without preamble.

"Chloe did what?" Jeremy asked, obviously confused.

"She basically told us all that if we were messing with you she would commit a massacre. I believed her, but I really didn't need that motivation. I wanted you to know I'm genuinely interested in you." Jimmy said.

Jeremy took that in, almost rolling his eyes at the mention of the massacre. Jimmy should believe her, because she would totally do it and get away with it, but he wasn't going to mention that part. "Well, I'm glad to hear that. Not that she threatened you all, because I'm not sure it was necessary, but that your interest is genuine. Genuine interest would be far better than interest because 'gay men give good head' any day."

"Wait, do they?" Jimmy asked, curiosity making him blurt out the question. "I had chalked that up to the Gay Agenda. Y'know: propaganda," he joked.

Jeremy gave a little laugh. "Oh, no, we definitely do. In the same way gay women are good at going down on a woman. Maybe it's because we have the same parts, usually. I mean, there are definitely selfish gay men who aren't great at it because they don't care to, like plenty of straight guys refuse to lick a woman because they don't care about her pleasure..."

"Learn something new every day," Jimmy said, finding some humor in the colloquialism, considering their location. "Um... about that kiss, though..."

"Yes?" Jeremy asked, moving slightly closer to him.

"Did you... enjoy it?" Jimmy asked, self-consciously, edging closer to Jeremy.

"I mean, before your friends came and whisked you away, definitely," Jeremy laughed.

"They're not here, now." Jimmy said suggestively, moving a stray hair behind Jeremy's ear.

Jeremy shivered at the touch, then looked back towards the door and then nodded before turning his eyes back to Jimmy. "That's true, they're not."

Jimmy moved in closer, trying a move he had seen in a movie. He stayed inside Jeremy's personal space, ready to kiss him but looking for signs that it wasn't a good time. Jeremy's mind seriously considered bolting for the door, but the far more brave side of him decided to throw caution to the wind, considering how genuine and sweet Jimmy seemed to be. He let his bag fall back to the floor and closed the distance between them, bringing their lips together in a sweet and gentle kiss.

Jimmy's hand almost instinctively went to the back of Jeremy's neck, his grip firm but in no way forceful. His backpack slipped from his shoulder to the ground and he pulled Jeremy closer with his other arm, enjoying the feel of the length of his body close by. Jimmy focused on the kiss with a little effort, making sure to express his interest in Jeremy as much as he could. He was surprised to find that the differences between kissing Jeremy and kissing girls wasn't all that huge, but it definitely felt unique to Jeremy.

There was the slight scrape of Jeremy's stubble against his face, and the scent of Jeremy that was a manly musk that Jimmy found he loved that had a hint of cocoa butter from his body wash. The hard muscles of his body were pressed against Jimmy, rather than soft curves, and Jeremy was slightly more aggressive in his kisses and his hand placement than a woman would be, as one hand was against his neck while the other was pressing into his lower back to bring him closer. Jimmy could even taste a little mint from one Jeremy had eaten before class, and the distinct taste that was all Jeremy.

For Jeremy, the kiss that they shared this time was much more eye opening than the first one, which had been quick and filled with so much other sensory information all around them. This kiss was longer, and quickly heated up in a way the first one didn't have a chance to. It was different from past kisses, which were fun and passionate, but nowhere near this electric. The firm grip on the back of his neck made his knees want to give out but he gripped one of his hands onto Jimmy's shoulder to keep himself standing, while Jimmy put an arm around him to keep him there and up.

Jimmy finally came up for air and eased back from the kiss, steadying himself against the desk. He waited for Jeremy to finish reacting and asked, "How was it this time?"

"Pretty amazing," Jeremy admitted. "How about you?"

"Considering it was only the second time I've ever kissed a guy, it left me pretty weak in the knees," Jimmy admitted.

That made Jeremy grin, thinking of how it did the same to him, though he didn't admit it out loud. "Well, that's good then. I'd hate for it to just be okay."

Jimmy laughed at that, "No, it's definitely way better than just okay."

"Good," Jeremy said with a smile still on his face, and he reached up to push some of Jimmy's blond hair back away from his face, making Jimmy let out a small sigh. "I'll see you at six then, Jimmy." He bit his lip as he turned away and walked out of the classroom to go and do some work in the library before his next class.

Jimmy watched him leave with a mix of emotions. He was thrilled that Jeremy seemed to enjoy his amateurish attempts at flirtation but he was also frustrated by just how easily he seemed to be able to pull away. It always left him wanting more. Maybe that was the point. Either way, he could watch Jeremy walk away all day when he was wearing pants like those, which showed his perfect ass bouncing slightly.

Jimmy gathered himself and went back to his room. It was time for a long hot shower and some "me" time thanks to Jeremy's teasing ways. Once back at the room, he was happy to see that his roomie (he'd have to learn the kid's name eventually) was off at class but was apparently downloading something. His computer was open and there was a note on the keyboard warning Jimmy not to touch. That meant the dorm's wifi would be bogged down for a while, but that was okay. The kid knew today was Jimmy's easy day and that he didn't tend to do a lot of research for his papers anyway.