Cocklust Ch. 32

Flynn and Jean-Jacques both asked for copies of our sex tape. Chad and I were flattered, but we told them no. After all, we'd always meant for that tape to stay private. Especially since Chad worked for a congressman, and wanted to build a career of his own, the last thing we needed was for that tape to get out.

Jean-Jacques was especially persistent. He said that even if he couldn't have the tape, he'd still like to do a photo shoot or something. At one point he brought it up at the bar, right in front of the twins, who couldn't resist the urge to pile on.

I have to admit Chad and I were tempted. Jean-Jacques kept showing us more of his work, and we both agreed he was a really good photographer. He seemed to have a particular eye for the male form, not that we were surprised. His models always looked really sexy, posing every which way, with the lighting just right. A lot of his best pictures weren't even nudes; he could make a fully-clothed man look totally sensual. I found myself imagining how Chad would look through his camera lens, or how I might look for that matter.

At the end of the day, though, we knew it wasn't for us. We had way too many other things going on in our lives, so we couldn't spare long hours for a shoot. Besides, I felt like we didn't need sexy pictures at all. I liked my Chad just the way he was, in the flesh, under regular lighting, and I just wanted him to feel the same way about me.

Before we knew it, the summer was almost over. It was probably a good thing too, since that was right around the time that the Collins divorce started heating up. In fact, it was getting downright nasty. Bill claimed Linda had kicked him to the curb right when he'd been hurt, when he needed her the most. Linda denied it; she said he'd turned her away, and that he'd cheated on her a bunch of times when he was overseas. That, in turn, was news to the rest of us, and we tried to gauge if it was true. The next thing we knew, Bill launched into Linda's parenting and the way the kids had turned out. The pissing match got more vicious from there.

Chad tried to keep a stiff upper lip, but I could tell how much it bothered him. Despite all the sacrifices he'd made for his father, Bill made it sound like he hadn't done a thing. Worse yet, Bill seemed to imply that Chad was fucked up, which was especially disappointing; I'd hoped we'd moved beyond Bill's homophobia, but apparently we hadn't.

It was almost a relief to go back to school and get away from that shit. It still hung over our heads, but in our tiny student apartment, it was just the two of us. We could at least try to pretend that our little world was the only one that mattered.

Living with Chad was bit of a new experience. I'd obviously gotten tastes of it before, but this was the first time we really had a place of our own. It did take some adjustment. For one thing, we had no privacy to speak of. It wasn't that we needed it: after all, we were used to seeing each other naked, and we were well-versed in each other's bodily functions. Still, it meant neither of us got much if any alone time. Our schedules were almost identical, even though our classes were different, so we usually left the house together. I might get a minute to myself if I was walking to a different building than he was; but that was basically it. Then we'd get back around the same time. Even when we were doing homework, with each of us working on a different assignment, we were never more than maybe ten feet apart.

That, in turn, made our personal tics much more glaring. Chad's messiness still drove me crazy, especially now that we were in such tight quarters. I kept trying to help him get organized, but I never got very far. Eventually I decided this was part of who he was, and that I couldn't change it about him. So I forced myself to get used to it.

One night I picked up an extra shift at Riedegost, so I left Chad home alone. When I got back, I walked in on him in the middle of a jack-off session. He was spread-eagled in our bed, naked as the day he was born, working a dildo in his ass with one hand and pounding his dick with the other.

"Woah," I said. "Good evening."

Chad slowed down his strokes. "Hey babe."

"Don't let me stop you."

"I didn't say you were."

My mouth watered as I took in the sight. Chad looked so fucking hot in that position. I couldn't help eyeing the pre-cum on his dick, which I wanted to lap up. I also couldn't help thinking of how far we'd come since freshman year; I remembered how my old roommate Dino had tried to jack off in secret, and so had I. I loved how Chad and I could be totally open about it.

"Care to join me?"

I couldn't take my eyes off his cock. "I think you know the answer to that."

"Well, what are you waiting for? Take your clothes off."

I was about to comply, but then I decided to have fun with it. I put on some music and launched into a striptease.

"Holy shit," Chad said as he watched. He still had his hand on his cock, and he was slowly massaging it.

I whipped off my shirt and threw it in a corner. I threw my head back, ran my hands down my chest, and started playing with my fly. Then I teased Chad some more: I turned my back to him and gyrated my butt.

"Yeah," he said. "Show me that ass."

I pulled my waistband down so that he could see my cleavage. I danced a little more, then undid my fly. I pulled down my pants and my underwear, but I still kept my back to him. Finally, when the music was right, I spun back around, and my package flopped into view.

Chad laughed. "Okay...."

"Are you saying you don't like my dancing?"

"Let me put it this way," he said. "I'm not dating you for your dancing skills. Now get over here."

I got on the bed, and we stared making out. As we did, I put my hand on Chad's cock. "I want that inside me...."

"Mm," Chad whispered. "What if I want to be the one to bottom?"

"Well, if we're not doing what Ryan and Marcos did...." I looked down at the dildo, which was buried deep inside him. "Of course, you've already found a way to get some anal action...."

"I guess that's one way to put it."

"I have an idea," I said, and I positioned my head over his dick. "Keep fucking yourself... and maybe we can both get what we want."

Chad did as he was told: he shoved the dildo especially far up his hole, then started sliding it in and out. As he did, I took his dick in my mouth, and I started sucking away.

Fuck, that dick tasted awesome! I hadn't blown him in a while, which had made me miss it that much more. Chad's pre-cum smeared all over my tongue. He also had a little sweat on his skin, so I got to enjoy his salty savory flavor, and I tried to keep it on my taste buds as long as I could. I also savored the musky scent of his pubes, that familiar aroma that was completely unique to Chad.

"Oh shit," he gasped as he gyrated his crotch. His rod thrust in and out of my mouth.

I tightened my lips around his shaft. I massaged his balls and tickled his ballsack. Then I ran my tongue around his mushroom tip, which was hard to do with his body moving so fast, but I managed.

"Fuck yeah," he said. "That feels so good...."

I could tell he was getting close. I didn't know how long he'd already been jacking off, but I knew how much he loved getting penetrated. I also knew what it meant when he started breathing especially heavy.

"Oh baby... oh fuck...."

I started sucking harder and harder, and faster and faster. I was slurping all over his cock. Then I felt his nutsack twitch, and his rod shuddered. The next thing I knew, his creamy cum was flooding my mouth.

Chad let out a bunch of quick gasps as his penis unloaded its contents. I couldn't see much in the position I was in, but I could tell he was grabbing the bedsheets. Finally his orgasm started to subside, and he sank into the mattress. "Oh baby...."

I made sure to lap up every last sperm cell. It had been a while since I'd eaten Chad's cum, and I'd almost forgotten how much I loved it. This time it was sweeter than usual-- apparently thanks to the pineapple we'd had for breakfast-- but I wasn't complaining. It still had that salty taste that I relished, with just the right amount of tartness, and that soft light texture that felt so good on my tongue. I almost wanted to keep it all in my mouth, but I knew I couldn't. Finally I gulped it down, and I felt its precious ingredients sliding down my throat.

"Fuck, that was awesome," Chad said. "It's a good thing you got home when you did."

"At your service," I replied.

Chad pulled the dildo from his ass. As soon as he did, I realized the dildo was actually mine. It was the one modeled from Chad's cock.

"Wait a minute...."

"I admit it, I wanted to take it for a ride. I knew how hard it made you cum... so I wanted to see what that was like."

"It's cool," I said. "Remember, I've pretty much done the same thing." I pointed at our drawer of sex toys. Chad's dildo-- the one modeled from my dick-- was sitting in plain view.

"Care to show me?"

"What?"

"I mean, I can get you off however you want... but I'd love to see you get fucked by your own cock."

I licked my lips. Part of me was embarrassed-- or at least I would've been embarrassed under normal circumstances-- but Chad had a way of making me feel comfortable and safe. "All right," I said as I reached for Chad's dildo.

"You're sure?"

"Yeah, why not?" I asked as I lubed myself up. "It's been inside me before."

Chad grinned. "How did it feel?"

"Fucking awesome."

"So you know why I love that dick so much?" He stared down at my crotch. "Not that the dildo is as good as the original, but still."

I laid back, spread my legs, and positioned the dildo over my hole. Then I slowly slid it inside me. "Fuck yeah...."

"You like how thick it is?" Chad asked. "Nice and meaty?"

I clenched my hole around the dildo. I did like the way it opened me up. "Yeah...."

"You like how it curves around just a little?" He reached down and adjusted the dildo. He clearly knew what he was doing; I felt a jolt of pleasure as he made it hit my prostate.

"Ooh yeah...."

"I fucking love it too," he said, and with that, he took my real dick in his mouth.

I threw my head back, and I savored the feeling of both my ass and my cock getting worked. Chad let me take the lead on the dildo, since he was busy with my shaft, but he did guide me here and there. After all, he knew more about taking that dick than I did.

"Mm," was all he could say. He rubbed my taint as he sucked away, all in perfect synchronization.

I knew I wasn't going to last long, so I didn't even try. I just relaxed and enjoyed the ride.

Chad sped up, and he tightened his lips around my shaft. Then he adjusted the dildo to hit my prostate again. And again.

My body was practically roiling in ecstasy. I let out a groan-- which I could barely control-- and I felt my muscles seize up. Then I felt my cum shoot through my cock, and I pumped my juices down Chad's throat.

"Mm," he said again as he swallowed. He kept sucking till my dick stopped convulsing. Then he flicked his tongue along the underside of my shaft, and he gave me a whole series of kisses: he slowly went from my piss slit to my ballsack and back. "Fuck, I love that cock...."

I pulled Chad's face closer to mine. "I love yours too," I said, "and I love what it does to me." I could still taste his cum in my mouth, and I could smell my own cum on his. I pressed my lips against Chad's, which sent at least some of our juices mixing together.

A big part of me wanted to fuck, but before I could say anything, Chad's dildo popped out of my ass. I didn't want to make a mess, so I forced myself to get up and wash it. While I was at it, I washed my own dildo too. As I did, I found myself thinking about what we'd just done, and I figured it meant we had no boundaries left. After all, if we were living together, not just having sex, but also openly jacking off around each other-- either with or without sex toys-- it was hard to see how much closer we could get.

When I got back to the bed, Chad had already made himself comfortable, and he was falling asleep. I decided not to angle for more sex. Instead, I just joined him under the covers, and I wrapped my naked body around his. I couldn't help savoring his warm bare skin against mine. Even my innards felt unusually pleasurable, probably thanks to Chad's cum, since it was making its way through my body.

I just laid here, holding my man, while we both fell asleep. It seemed like the most comfortable, most relaxing feeling in the world.

That semester turned out to be less busy than we thought, partly because our fraternity was gone. With our extra time, we got more involved with Wildcat Pride, and we got to know a lot of cool people. It was kind of a turnaround for Chad, considering how self-conscious he'd used to be. Even a semester before, there was no way I could've gotten him interested in a full-blown queer group. But now that we'd spent so much time in Hillcrest, he seemed to appreciate being around other people like us. Not that we had a problem with straight stuff, or that other people had a problem with us; it was just cool being around other like-minded people.

The difference was especially clear on homecoming weekend. In our old world, we would've spent that weekend throwing a big party, along with the other fraternities on the Row, and we would've gotten totally blitzed. But this year, homecoming fell on National Coming Out Day, so the parade organizers decided to feature Pride. Our group ended up near the front of the parade, right behind the marching band, with rainbow flags all around us.

As Chad and I marched, I couldn't help thinking of my own coming out. I remembered how I'd told my mom not to advertise it; I'd even said I didn't need to wave a rainbow flag. Yet here I was, parading down the street with my boyfriend at my side, rainbow flag and all.

We started chatting with the other marchers, and we started sharing our coming-out stories. Everyone seemed to have had a different experience. Bella had actually come out twice: she'd originally considered herself a gay guy, but she'd always wanted to be a girl, which had spurred her to come out as trans. Her family had been pretty weirded out by it, and they still weren't sure about it. O'Mac was on the opposite end of the spectrum: he and his family had always known he was gay, so he'd never come out at all.

About halfway down the parade route, I saw some of our old fraternity brothers: Shane, Hunter, Drew, Ryan, and Marcos. I almost wanted to invite them to join us, since they were all gay or bi or whatever. Then again, I wasn't sure if Shane and Drew were officially out, and I didn't want to put them on the spot. Chad and I just waved at them, and we shouted a few frat-boy taunts back and forth.

Afterward, most of us Pride marchers went to the game, except for O'Mac, who apparently had a hot date. Chad was the only one of us dudes who really cared about the game, though some of the lesbians did too. For the rest of us, it was just an excuse to hang out. I mostly enjoyed the eye candy, between the muscular guys on the field, the shirtless boys covered in body paint, and the other jocks who'd shown up to watch.

I texted Ryan to see if he and the others wanted to do something later. We hadn't hung out with him and Marcos since the Fourth of July, and we hadn't talked to the others since spring. Ryan texted back right away. Apparently he and the other guys were in the crowd too, though Ryan wasn't watching the game either. Ordinarily he wouldn't have gone, except Marcos insisted. We agreed to meet up at halftime.

I was just putting away my phone when I saw O'Mac stomping toward us. He was visibly pissed.

"Bad date?" Chad asked.

"No date," O'Mac said. "The asshole stood me up. He kept me waiting there for half an hour. Now he's ghosting me."

"Shit, I'm sorry."

"I hate men."

"If it makes you feel any better," I said, "I don't think straight people have it any easier. Just ask my sister."

O'Mac snorted. "What's her story?"

"She seems successful and all-- she's starting at Columbia Law School-- but she's totally unhappy with her love life. Or lack thereof."

"Columbia?" O'Mac said. "My brother goes there."

"If he's single," I said, "not to mention straight--"

"Yeah I guess... but straight people still have it easier. Look at how much bigger their dating pool is. I don't know how you two did it-- meeting someone and all."

"I mean, it hasn't always been easy."

"Still," he said, "you've obviously done better than me. These Grindr hookups are getting fucking old."

Just then, our quarterback caught a forward pass. He raced for the end zone, and the crowd let out a roar, but then he got tackled.

I had to wait for the cheers to die down. "You'll find somebody," I said. "I mean, I met Chad when I wasn't even looking. Funny how that works."

O'Mac crossed his arms. "I don't think I'm that lucky," he said.

When halftime rolled around, our old friends came by, and we introduced them to the others. Outwardly, we probably looked like any other dudes hanging out at the game. But for anyone listening closely, it was a hell of a conversation.

Ryan and Marcos announced they were coming out as polyamorous. They'd started dating Drew, so they were officially a throuple. I probably did a double-take when they said it; I could tell Chad was surprised too, though he did a good job of hiding it. I definitely hadn't seen that coming, though Ryan and Marcos had never been exclusive.

I congratulated all three of them, but I had to resist the urge to ask a lot of questions. I'd never known anyone who was openly "poly"-- which was the word they used-- so I couldn't help wondering how a throuple would work. I was also tempted to ask if this meant they still had an open relationship, or if was it just the three of them now. I was especially curious about what it was like for Drew in particular, since he was getting into an existing relationship, if that was really the right way to put it.

Anyway, I couldn't find a tactful way to ask that stuff, so I just bit my lip. I got the sense that it was new to all three of them, so even they were just starting to figure things out. I didn't want to make things weird, so I just acted casual. I told myself if that was what that they wanted, more power to them.

It turned out they weren't the only ones trying new things. Shane was trying to figure out if he was more into girls or guys or a combination of both. Apparently he'd been questioning himself since that spring, when he'd gotten his first taste of man sex. He'd dated a girl over the summer, but it hadn't worked out. Now he said he was up for whatever.

"That's cool," Chad said. "You'll never know what you like till you try it."

"I guess," Shane replied. "What was it like for you guys?"

"What do you mean?"

"How long did it take to figure out you were... you know...."

"Gay?" Chad looked at me, then looked back at Shane. "I probably knew years ago, I just didn't want to admit it. It was once I met Scott...."

"Oh come on," I said.

"Dude, it's the truth. You know I came out to my family for you."

I bit my lip. I did feel kind of flattered, but I also felt guilty. After all, Chad's coming-out had made a lot of waves in his parents in particular, and it had sparked a lot of the drama we were dealing with now. I didn't like the thought of me being responsible for that, even just a little. But I didn't say a word.

"For me," Hunter said, "it wasn't hard to figure out I was bi. I lost my virginity to a girl, but then I hooked up with a guy, and I liked them both."

"Hm," Shane said. "You make it sound so simple."

"It's cool," Hunter said. "Nobody's breathing down your neck. Take your time."