Cricket 02

Cricket 02

Hello again. It's Cricket and I just wanted to continue my saga of how life is for someone who enjoys wearing fem clothing. It's a delicate balance between trying to live the dreaming softer life and actually living a nightmare.

On the dreamy side, I had a nice ego boost after meeting Kyle at the Ice Cream Parlor. He was pleasant, funny and an obvious T-Girl dater based on the Raspberry Smoothies I caught him purchasing. A clear advantage for someone like me who wouldn't mind going out and not be dropped off at home with a swollen jaw because he found your surprise and freaked out.

On the nightmare side, Kyle was in a relationship with Didi Freckles, a very popular T-Girl, so my dream of a pleasant evening at the movies were washed away with the tide. But Kyle risked his life by cheating on Didi by calling me a few times. He even stopped by and gave me his Polo shirt to wash because I guess it wasn't his shirt that I was rubbing dry when we bumped into each other at the Ice Cream Parlor the week before and we spilled Smoothie on his shirt. On the bright side, LOL, he posted that he just happened to stop by the Ice Cream Parlor on his way to pick up his hot date and ended up having sex in the corner of parlor because a customer spilled his drinks on him and had to rub him dry, LOL, in the wrong places. Also, Kyle dropped off his pants to be washed too along with, LOL, his robot space monkey boxers. Ahh, it was funny at the moment.

Unfortunately, what wasn't funny was how Didi Freckles must have doubled down on her sex efforts because Kyle called and said he probably wouldn't be calling me much anymore. Well, we all wake up from our dreams eventually, so whatever. I had a nice moment smashing into him on purpose and who knows what the future holds, right? Also, Didi Freckles carries a blade, so I backed off.

Oops, on the day dreaming side of the nightmare life that was mine, I did what I had to do as I washed and folded Kyle's clothes. I checked the sizes just in case the future holds a new wardrobe for him. Also, I washed his ridiculous boxer shorts again because I may or may not have slept with a robot space monkey.

Anyways, I wasn't deterred just because Kyle dumped me before he even dated me. I had my previous experience from dressing in front of my friends all the time, I had a new experience of how to dry off everything but the Smoothie wet spot, I had my ex, Bing-Bing, for moral support and I had a new (cheap) St. Patrick's Day costume. Which I was going to wear for Kyle during our small and private fake holiday party for two, before he dumped me.

And by not deterred, I mean I decided to change my private party for two into a normal party, which means it would be a party for three because Josh and Jake are my only two true friends. In other words, I had a cheap costume, cheap themed makeup, a corned beef finger sandwich platter on order with the Deli and I was wearing it all one way or the other! Well, not the sandwiches, but the cheap makeup was going on! Well again, the green tinted eye Pearls weren't that cheap.

Now, it would be barely more than a green tinted standard gathering for the guys and myself, but I knew that they would appreciate something a little different. And by that, I mean they would appreciate anything at all. LOL, they may not wear fem clothing, but they are secluded as I am. And no, I didn't just call the three of losers. We have a fourth, Dale, but he comes around a lot less.

Plus, I almost looked forward to getting all high and stuff from their second smoke. I mean, I'm half out of my shell now, so let the good times roll, right? LOL, we'll see.

Unfortunately, as some of you might know, eye Pearls look stupid if the arch and the spacing aren't perfect, so I got stupid and asked my ex, Bing-Bing, for help. I should have chosen to jump off of a bridge instead, but all the bridges in the Middleton are small and a broken ankle didn't seem like a good way to host a fake holiday party. Ex's, right?

"Hold still Cricket before I poke your eye out with one of these flashy Pearls. Cute green tint though. You always have had a good fashion sense. It's too bad you never a good relationship sense or we might still be together. Close your left eye lid please."

"Ah, you said we would be together forever if I continued to treat you like a queen."

"Well, that was before you revealed this stupid sissy stuff. But let's not argue now. Do I need to ask why all the shine and glitter for just your dorky friends and a small party on such a fake holiday? If this a dating situation, you can tell me. Do you mind if I add a little extra green liner?"

"Oh, green, huh?"

"Shut it and hold still. You know I will always love you and we had so much when we were dating, so maybe just a little increase on my daily ATM limit? Also, I called the Mildred at the Deli and added a bottle of Buttermilk to your order, just in case you feel the need to suck anything tonight. But back to my allowance, you remember how hot and heavy we were for those five dates, right? I mean, you seen me topless from the back when I changed my shirt. That counts for something, right?"

"Oh, hot and heavy, huh? Hey, did we ever actually make out?"

"Shut it, you were queer from the start. Besides, you wrecked your pants once. I mean, I didn't have anything to do with it and I wasn't even there, but it was on the same day of our third date, so that counts in my favor. Listen, did Mei-Ling tell you that I have been seeing someone? I mean, you're trying to date and I'm dating, so everything is peachy right?"

"Like she would miss an opportunity to rub that in my face time and time again. Anyways, what do you think of my fancy St. Patricks' Day costume?"

"Oh, slutty, trashy, shiny street worker, you pick one. But your eyes are flashy. Anyways, I'm still going to marry you after everyone in my family moves back across the ocean and I can have a bowl of white rice without being shamed. Well, unless I get pregnant from all the men I have dating before and since our hot and heavy special time."

"OMG, you and your excuses suck!"

"But you don't, just remember that chirp, chirp sweetie."

"Excuse me?!?!?!?!?"

"Sorry, clickity, click, Cricket. And remember, Buttermilk. Kiss, kiss."

Ex's, right? They dump you, but never really leave. They leave Lego blocks on floor so you step on them in your bare feet in the dark and you don't even own a Lego set. Oh, and let's forget their lack of food ordering skills because Mildred from the Deli called me to verify that I wanted one carton of milk and a stick of butter on the side! I mean, ex's, right? I mean, I said yes, but ex's, right?

And just to get it out of the way, let me remind you that I said in the last chapter that I own a few costumes. What I may not have said was that they were not good ones. They never look like the photos on the packaging, right?

Anyways, all I want to say is that that my new cheap holiday costume was 3 pieces, shiny shorts, a somewhat fancy top and a 3-button jacket. The model on the package looked great in it, but if I were to dye it red, well, I could easily get a job at the local movie theater. I kept the jacket buttoned up and not because I was trying to hide an overdose of milkshakes. It was just neater all buttoned up, that's all.

So, there I was, dressed and ready to host a standard gathering with a green tint to it. That was sort of the most nerve wrecking moments. In between getting dressed and before the first guests showed up. The anxious moments, if you will. Oh, my anxiety went through the roof when there was a knock at the front door way before Josh and Jake were supposed to show up.

Hah, enter stage left, the love of my life, the best ex ever, Bing-Bing and her working knowledge of social media and her knowledge of how to crank up the anxiety levels. I mean, I didn't invite Angela Jaye over. I can't post on her homepage because she such a Tranny diva, but there she was, standing on my front porch in a pair of Denim shorts that were way to short for her to wear in public.

"Let's not make this weird, Cricket. I'm only here to tell you three things. One, Bing-Bing stole my boyfriend, again, and this is how she is saying she's sorry. Two, Bing-Bing gave your GPS info, so don't think of me as a stalker and three, Bing-Bing sent me here to remind you that the dating life on the side of a T-Girl is always one sided. Cute eyes, by the way. May I come in?"

"Please, come in, but check your blade at the door. In response, you're lying about Bing-Bing stealing your boyfriend, so you better come clean about that excuse. Are you crashing my party for Josh or Jake? Also, are you hungry? I have a corned beef platter and a stick of butter."

"Do you mind if I'm hungry and horny at the same time? Jake, it's Jake. I understand that you and Josh are close and I'm not getting in the middle of all that. Hmmm, one finger sandwich and two slices of butter patties please."

"Click, click, click, horny for Jake, right Angela Jaye? I mean, click, click, not for me, right? Also, you're poking out a little from the bottom of those shorts and it's making me uncomfortable."

"LOL, I have a change of clothes in the car, but now that I have your attention, why can't I be horny for you? You're cute enough. There is no rule that says a T-Girl can't have a T-Girl side piece. I mean, I'm poking at you and all."

"Click, click, click, click."

"Yes, I said you're cute enough, so, how about it? We have time before your friends arrive, right?"

Well, it was time to do a few things. One, I had better read the handbook again and quick, two, LOL, OMG, Bing-Bing the ex, right? And three, snap, she's cuter than cute enough.

"Hmmm, you serve up a good slice of butter, Cricket. Hey, your friends are coming over all packed up with smoke, right?"

"I don't know about the things you think I know about it, Angela Jaye. Anyways, they always have a stash, so be prepared to get all high and stuff from the second smoke."

"Hah, it's first-hand smoke for me. Also, you're still looking down."

"Click, click, click, click."

"Here is fine, although I would prefer your bedroom."

"Click, click, click, click."

"OMG, I don't know why I wear shorts this short. I just wanted to make I seduced you properly."

"Click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click."

"Ah, does a cricket have Cricket's tongue? You can stay in your cheap little costume. Also, where did you find those eye Pearls? That's hot."

"Click, click, click, click, click, click. Angela Jaye, this has become a lot for me. Can't you just change your clothes now and get ready to seduce Jake?"

"Oh, don't you dare release in your undies, sweetie. Now, your bedroom or right here? And get me a napkin for the butter patties."

"Click, click, click, click."

"Ahh, don't worry Cricket, I just have to act all bad ass and stuff. Bing-Bing said I should go all seductive on you and stuff. We don't have to do anything today, but we should talk about something for another day. I meant when I said you're cute enough."

"So, you're not going to drill my mouth and ruin me for Josh, I mean regular guy's forever?"

"LOL, ah, no, unless that's what you really want. You could tuck me back in though. I swear, I don't know why I wear such skimpy clothes sometimes. Duh, silly T-Girls, right? It's like I never learn. Oh, oh my, or you could do that. Oh my, is that your first kiss, Cricket because that's not your first kiss."

Well, the damn was right there and the damn thing was throbbing and the damn T-Girl pulled my head forward and the damn thing just so happened to touch my lips. I mean, I was innocent, as I sat on my couch feeling that it was time to dump the "fresh" title. And it just seemed easier with a T-Girl like Angela Jaye. I mean, she would be gentle, right? As opposed to Josh who has wanted to wreck me for over a year.

"Oh, that's nice, Cricket. Yeah, hey, we just need to figure out who is who's side piece. Ooh, that's the way. Mind if I push forward a little? Or you can just do that. Ooh."

At least she asked, right? I mean, she asked after she pushed forward, but at least she asked.

"Just make me experienced and shut it, AJ."

LOL, that's never the right thing to say. Also, did I seriously say "make me experienced" or something? Who the hell says that?

"Hah, wait, did you seriously just say make me experienced? Who in the hell says that? Ooh, hey, WTF Cricket? Have you been holding back, OMG, or lying? Um, ugh, babe. OMG, more suction, stop, I'm about to make you experienced! OMFG, so this is how the other half lives, huh? Boom Cricket."

"Click, click, click, click."

"OMG, you swallowed?"

"Click, click, click, click."

"And I get Jake without any hassles?"

"Click."

"Good, now listen Cricket. If you post about this, well, I like phrases like the perfect size, OMG, how cute and pink is that, wow, hot, such a valuable partner and nice things like that. Also, listen, now that Bing-Bing is pregnant and engaged, ah, is that "kept woman" job open?"

"Click, click, click."

"Hey, don't ask me, she's your ex. It's not my job to keep up with things."

"Click, click, click!!!"

"Well, the word is that she is going to put your name on the birth certificate, so apply for a paternity test quick. Also, remind the Judge that you're a sissy and it's not possible to be Baby Daddy."

"Click, CLICK, CLICK, click, click, click."

"Sorry, confused boy who doesn't like to be called a cross dresser, yet wears female clothes. Geez, diva much?"

"Click, click. Oops, click, click Buttermilk."

"I enjoyed it too Cricket. You're my first from that side and that was great. And I'm your first too, right? And I don't like Buttermilk, so just pour some of the Buttermilk out and tell Bing-Bing that's what you sucked on."

"CLICK, click, clickity click."

"Hey, if you don't want to make decisions, then don't get all high and stuff. And don't even follow up on that. I have no problem admitting that I have been making bad decisions for three years now. But I promise, it's only about Jake. You can twerk Josh all you want. I'll change now, but don't expect much better. I'm kind of a slut you know. Go gargle and get ready for your guests."

Well, that was surprise sex for both of us, but I always knew that it would happen sooner or later and what better way to be made experienced than from a fine ass T-Girl (slut) like Angela Jaye, right?

I'd say more, but a pair of headlights just shined through the little windows of my front door. The guests have arrived and oh boy, are they going to be surprised.

End Cricket 02