Crossdressing, Why Me?

So many times I have thought to myself what is the reason I cross dress? I am and always have been sporty. I am masculine and love contact sports both to participate in and watch, like football, rugby and martial arts. My wife has asked and cannot comprehend my reasoning for dressing femme. There were times when I didn't understand either. Maybe my words will help others with the same issues and lack of understanding. It is a difficult matter for a man to discuss with anyone let alone his wife and also difficult to understand himself at times or to share with others, unless they too are a crossdresser.

Let me begin by saying I love it. I love the sensuality, feelings, sensations and sexiness of dressing female and I love the attention both sexually and verbal social interactions when dressed female. I even find words like panties, knickers, bras, stockings & suspenders evocative and sexually thought provoking.

My fascination with ladies clothing and lingerie goes way back. I have always been intrigued by it and been drawn towards it. I have over the years looked through many women's magazines, brochures and catalogues looking at lingerie and other clothing. Manikins in shop windows, racks upon racks of lingerie in stores have always a source of great interest as have been websites.

Over my life I have spent many hours when given the chance to stare at sexily dressed women and their clothing whenever the opportunity has arisen. Whether wearing pretty dresses, short skirts and skimpy tops or best of all just sexy lingerie, I love it. It took a long time for me to realise it was the lingerie and clothes that attracted my attention not the women themselves wearing the items. Since I can remember looking at women's attire has been cause for arousal. Initially it was in a way I didn't understand, but now I do!

Shortly after moving out from my parent's home my aunt Susan (whose name I took in honour of her due to her unknowingly lending me her clothes) came to share my flat a while. She had always been like an older sister to me and we had always been close. She had just broken up with her boyfriend and was left potentially homeless.

I had a spare room so I was pleased to be able to help my aunt out. In the terms of my cross dressing it was to offer me an opportunity that I'd been waiting for. A new gifted opportunity! It took no time at all before I was taking a great interest in her washing basket. I loved the smells, colours, sexy styles and sensual feel of the fabrics. Very soon I found myself trying her panties on whenever given a chance. Wow, they felt deliciously sensual caressing my ever stiffening dick. I was becoming a page out of a catalogue. With that thought in mind I went and found a bra. It was difficult to fasten at first behind my back but eventually I did it. I loved the feel, the elastic gripping me, and the appearance. At the time I had shoulder length fair hair and am of slim build and only 5'6" so I suppose I did look fairly feminine. As most crossdressers know the next step was to take in the view in a mirror making me feel really horny. It felt amazing,so arousing, so different. I remember how turned on I was that first time and every time since. I can still recall how it felt that first time. It was so sexy touching my body through that sexy sensual fabric. Little did I know this feeling was to be life changing.

One day when I knew she would be out for a long time I slipped on a pair of tights (pantyhose) as well which was the next step and what a lovely sensation it was. To feel the sheer fabric caress my legs and feel the wonderful sensation as my thighs rubbed together was absolutely divine. My legs were so sensitive as they are still today when wearing hosiery. The feelings were electric. My erection soon swelled, fighting to get out of being trapped inside. I was so hard. This was to become my norm whenever I had the opportunity to dress femme.

The next step was to put on a bra then search for a dress. It was a snug fitting mini dress with a pretty pattern on it. I loved the sensual feel of wearing it over some tights and sheer bikini panties and matching bra.

The sight of my sexily covered legs under that lovely dress was delightfully exciting. That was my first, but definitely not going to be my last time, that I dressed fully female. That is why it prominently stands out so clearly in my memory. I ran my hands all over my sexually aroused body enjoying every moment. I stroked my sensually covered legs and felt myself through my padded out bra and panties as if I were female. Best of all though was actually feeling female inside and out. I felt so sexy, lovely, so sensually erotic.

Sadly my aunt moved out and that ended that chapter of crossdressing. I had nothing to slip into to cross dress in to aid my arousal. But my thoughts of doing so remained. My aunt had helped me start something really erotically exciting. I slowly began to acquire some lingerie of my own which I wore often and many times beneath my man clothes, even at work. It was to be a while though before I began dressing in company for any kind of sexual relief itself but I will write about that another time.

So what is crossdressing for me? What does it do for me? How do I explain it? For me it is all about feelings. The feelings and sensations wearing sexy fabrics and garments in beautiful styles. Also the feeling of elastic in different places tugging gently around my aroused body. I love the different colours and styles making me feel feminine. I love the brush of a hemline on my stockinged legs, and the sight of my slim legs in stiletto heels. All of this turns me on but as important is how it makes me feel inside.

I don't want to be a woman but dressing as one taking in all the delights of wearing female clothing makes me feel different. It is a form of escapism too from the pressures of work and drudgery of daily life. It is relaxing and sensationally liberating. It is also exceptionally horny being dressed like the woman of your desires and knowing how she would feel in the sexiest lingerie and how she would turn a guy on. To be dressed to please and to arouse in stockings, sexy panties and matching bra, with silicone boobs, heels, make-up, wig and skimpy top and mini skirt is truly heaven.

Finally let me add the deep routed feelings and desires to dress are uncontrollable, almost an addiction which cannot be easier to understand or explain than left or right handedness.

I wrote this dressed in baby blue panties, matching bra and belt with dark tan stockings under a black mini skirt and satin top. I also have a huge smile shati g these secrets with you. I will follow this article up with some tales of my sexploits in the near future so please be patient. In the meanwhile as all cross dressers know I would love your feedback.

Love Suzie X