Dark as Daylight Ch. 22

"Gee, you are easy. Debbie told me you didn't want to have children. Now I have you agreeing to at least 2. That was a major win for me."

"Richard, I am going to kill you right after you say 'I Do' and sign all your worldly goods over to me in the event of your untimely death. After I see my mother and father on Atwater Luck, I'm going to come back to Earth and build the biggest yacht ever conceived by man. Then I'm going to circumnavigate the globe while wearing the tiniest bikini ever made. The crew is going to be all female, because I might as well be naked. When the 6^th Fleet knows I'm coming into the Mediterranean, they will alter their course to come and see me. When I traverse the Suez Canal, the Egyptians will put up curtains so the Muslims can't see me in my nakedness. I would start a religious war if they did. As I exited the Red Sea, through the Bab-al-Mandab Strait, a cease-fire would take place in Yemen, so I could pass peacefully, into the Gulf of Aden and into the Arabian Sea. Leaving the Gulf of Aden, I would find the 5^th Fleet waiting to escort me through the Arabian Sea and Indian Ocean all the way to Indonesia. I would not want for company, should I desire it."

"You don't think much of yourself do you, Rebecca? You were a little fish at the University of Chicago pursuing a PhD until you came down here for a trip on my spacecraft. I'll repeat that for you, for emphasis, "MY SPACECRAFT." You were going to have to pay a great deal of money for this trip, and it was only through a quirk of fate that you and I hit it off. It's up to you, Rebecca, do you want to get rid of me, or do you want to live with me for the rest of your life? There is nothing in between that for me. I love you, with my whole heart. Can you say the same thing, without reservation, or not?"

Holden yelled, "Rich, did you see the print out from the computer?"

"Not now, Holden, I'll be with you in a few minutes. My future is in flux right now, and I want to see which way it's going."

"Oh, she's off the deep end again. I'll be at the computer trying to work this thing out. Let me know how it goes?"

Rebecca yelled, as she ran towards Holden, "You bastard, I am not off the deep end, I am having a civil conversation with my betroth."

Holden took evasive action and yelled to his brother, "Is this what she calls a civil conversation?"

"Well, so far, I've gotten 2 children out of it."

"She doesn't want children, Debbie told me so."

"You have to be smarter than your opposition to get what you want Holden. I asked for 9 children and she settled for 2. It was a major win for me. Of course, it all depends on us getting married in 3 weeks. I may not live that long, she may not live that long, or we may not live that long.

She is as irrational a human being as I have ever seen. When we 1^st met, it was Debbie that acted this way. Somewhere, between then and now, their identities have changed, and now Rebecca is the one who cannot control herself."

Joan Finch said, "Richard do you want to see my granddaughter behave herself?"

"Mrs. Finch, I do not want to see you get hurt. She is truly out of control today."

"Watch this Richard. Rebecca, your grandfather has received permission for us to play Augusta National over this next weekend. I am putting 1 caveat on you joining us. You must act like a normal, rational, human being. The persons rating your behavior is myself and Richard Luck. A score of less than 90 means you stay in the hotel room for the entire weekend. Is that understood, Rebecca?"

"You're not being fair, grandmother. Richard is going to fail me on general principles. He's not happy with me at this moment."

"He's marrying you in 3 weeks, why isn't he happy with you?"

"He's got a bug up his ass."

"And who put it there?"

"I guess, I did."

"Why?"

"I'm tired of waiting to get married, and I'm blaming him for it."

"Who picked the date for your wedding, and why?"

"I did. After looking at all the alternatives, it was the 1^st day all the people who are associated with the Good Luck 2 could be here and lift off was the next day."

"So, all this nonsense is Richard's fault, isn't it?"

"No grandmother, it's not his fault. It's my fault for not wanting to wait any longer to be with him totally."

"Why don't you have a civil ceremony, and have the big ceremony in 3 weeks?"

"When Richard suggested that I hit him because it was a stupid idea."

"Why is it a stupid idea? Your grandfather and I wouldn't mind, and it would take the pressure off the 2 of you."

"Richard would you mind getting married this weekend?"

"You're not going to be here this weekend. You're going to be in Augusta Georgia playing golf, and I'm going to be here trying to decipher Teddy's architecture for the new communication device. We can't get married if we are in 2 different places. I sure am sorry about that."

Rebecca screamed, "Luck, you are a dead man."

He replied, "Mrs. Finch, I believe this is where you walked in."

"Spank her Richard, she will come to her senses soon enough. There are Justices's of the peace in Augusta. I'll make sure 1 of them is in the clubhouse when we arrive."

"Thank you, Mrs. Finch, I will spank her, with great relish, but I will do it in private."

"Enjoy yourself, but remember that she gets even sooner or later."

"I know that only too well, Mrs. Finch."

"Rich, leave the fun until later, we have got to go over this computer read out. This stuff is hot and the way Teddy did it is mind numbing. I don't see how it works. How the hell do you shrink light-waves. I know you can shrink soundwaves, but light is a totally new ballgame."

"Let's put our thinking caps on and see where Teddy takes us."

"Could you 2 geniuses use another brain to see what's going on in this brave new world she's taking you to?"

"Absolutely, Mr. Schneider has his whole engineering staff trying to figure this out. We are not stupid enough to exclude anyone who is trying to help us figure with his going on."

Rebecca yelled, "Debbie, get your cheating ass in here."

Holden put his head down. "I shouldn't have used the word anyone, because here comes trouble."

"She is not trouble, she is my sister, and she is as smart as anyone in this room."

"If you say so."

Richard said, "That was very good, Holden, because she's right behind you."

"There is nothing wrong with my sense of smell."

He got hit instantly.

"I took a shower this morning."

"I know, I can smell the industrial-strength soap you used."

"You are going to die, Holden, very painfully."

"Mr. Constantine, help me please."

"What did you do this time, Holden?"

"I told Debbie I smelled the soap she used. She took exception to it, and hit me."

"Rebecca, tell me, truthfully, is that what happened?"

"I can tell you truthfully that Holden did not lie to you. However, he didn't tell you the whole truth. He left one tiny thing out."

"Richard, what did your brother leave out?"

"He left out 2 words, Mr. Constantine: Industrial strength. That was all."

"Let me see if I have this correct now. You said to Debbie that you could smell the industrial-strength soap she used. Is that right, Holden?"

"Right on the money, Mr. Constantine."

"I sorely hope you 2 find other people to marry. You 2 would be a disaster waiting to happen."

"I like my body in its current condition, Mr. Constantine. I will continue training to build up my skill sets, but somehow I doubt I will ever be as good as Debbie is."

"It's always good to know your limitations, Holden. It's also good to know how to play defense against a superior opponent. It will drive them crazy if they can't land offensive strikes, on an opponent they should be able to overcome.

You have seen me do that to Laura many times, and it drives her nutty. Even when she redesigned the gym and put in circular mats, I found a way to beat her, without using a wall. I stood at the very edge of the mat, and there was nothing she could do about it. She couldn't get behind me, without going out of bounds. She couldn't attack from the left or right because of the curve of the mat. She could only attack from the front, and I was superior to her in that position.

It is wonderful to make up with her when we get home from a match where she losses to me. She is an animal, and she takes out her aggression on me."

Rebecca said, "Richard, if I have to pack you in 1 of my bags, we are getting married this weekend, in Augusta."

Joe said, "Did I miss something important, or did somebody move up the wedding?"

"Mr. Constantine, everything remains the same, except for one tiny thing. Richard and I are having a civil ceremony in Augusta this weekend. My grandparents have approved it, because I am driving everyone crazy. If it doesn't stop, I will lose Richard. After the ceremony, my grandparents, Debbie and I, will be playing 18 holes at Augusta National. Richard and Holden will be working on the schematics for the new device they received from Atwater Luck.

After we finished playing 18 holes, Holden and my grandparents will disappear, and Richard and I will be able to consummate our marriage. I hope and pray that this will finally calm me down and make me into the normal human being I was when I lived in Chicago. I will finally have the one thing I wanted in my life, and have been missing sorely, of late.

He will never be able to get rid of me, and I will never let him go, because he is my better half. I've known this since he sat on my chest in the gym and told me so. He is so good to me, and I have been so rotten to him lately. I have to change back to who I was so I can make him laugh, and not take himself so seriously all the time. I don't want him to die at the age of 30, because all he did was work. I want him to be able to laugh along with me, and our kids, until he's 100. I don't want him to die at 53 years old, of cancer, as his father did. It's much too young to leave this earth and his family."

"You're right, Rebecca, your 1^st chance at happiness starts now. It's Tuesday, you will leave for Augusta on Thursday. Why don't you take Richard with you and have him pack your underwear for you? I know one thing that will happen to you, Friday, after you play golf, and you will remember it for the rest of your life."

"Mr. Constantine, you are a nasty man."

"Mrs. Finch, you have no idea how nasty I can be. Your sister does, but you only know secondhand."

"She told me that story, and I had to change my panties afterwards. I repeat, you are a nasty man."

"Laura likes me that way."

THE END