Detective Shauna Franklin

The sun had set some time ago. I could see the lights in the distance, adding an almost welcoming call from the darkness that land was just at the tip of the horizon. This trip was a final promise to my wife. On her deathbed she had made me promise to take our daughter on a cruise, Victoria had then pulled a sheet of paper out from under her pillow and handed it to me, the cruise was paid for and this was the confirmation.

I had no idea how she did all this from a hospital bed, although I suspected her parents had a hand in this as well. So with little choice left to me considering she was slipping away minute by minute, I agreed. Her face lit up and that smile that had held both me and my heart to her every day of our relationship and marriage proved to me once again, just how deeply I loved her and through her, the gift she gave me eighteen months into our marriage.

So, one year to the day of her death my daughter Sophie and I had spent two great weeks on the biggest boat she had ever seen. If anything it had breathed a little life back into me now. I was all but useless after the funeral and if it wasn't for my cousin I'm not even sure the funeral would have been organized. I was dead inside, it was only Sophie that got me out of bed and kept me going from one day to the next over the first few months.

I had read the stages of mourning, I had even challenged myself with those very questions, from 'when will I feel better after a loss' to 'how long does grief last after the death of a partner'. My favorite one was 'people think I should move on, but I can't.'

All held valid points, yet none of these people knew my wife. She was the glue that held all three of us together. When we found out about her cancer and just how aggressive it was she was the only one of us that stood firm, held me up as I floundered and still looked after our daughter. I always believed that Victoria's love within our family unit was the reason she stayed alive for so long.

She was wise enough to know that only this cruise was going to be the turning point for me. Always the one that thought ahead in our relationship, she must have known that my returning to the land of the living could be done in stages. Her folks became my pillar as I dealt with my loss and return to work, although I did make some changes there as well.

Delegation became a watch word as well as a couple of overdue promotions. Cherry picking at the technology that was around today also helped as I set about converting one of the rooms at the house into a home office. I swore to myself that I wasn't going to miss any of Sophie's growing up. Now, on the occasions that I do go to the office I was glad I made the choice to give some of my people the reins.

So when I do return home in the evening Sophie became my world and I watched in awe at just how much like her mother she was as the days, weeks and months passed.

Little Sophie, was by far the more resilient one of us and it took this trip for me to realize it. I was truly awake now, no more stumbling from one hopeless moment to sheer terror of living my life without Victoria. It took this trip with my own six-year-old daughter to do just that. There was so much of her mother in her that it felt like I was just looking at a younger version of her.

"Where is that daddy?" A little voice asked from behind me.

Looking at where my daughter was pointing, the lights of the city could only just be seen. Some of the taller buildings were still impressive, even from this distance.

"That my little one is New York. We will be home in the morning." I replied.

My little girl stood and watched the lights on the far-off horizon. Her hand slipped into mine and we both watched the soft lights in the distance. With a sigh of contentment I stepped away from the side and gave my little girl a smile.

"You need to get to bed now, you've had a long day today, remember you're off to your grannies for the rest of the summer the day after tomorrow."

Her tiny hand released mine and I turned, starting to walk back into the cabin, the night was so calm and yet filled with, something. I had been feeling whatever it was for most of the day; at best my description would be feeling static build up within me. I felt a great ache in the joints of my elbows and knees, the headache was a forgone conclusion, more so because I spent so much time trying to figure all this out.

The reasons for all these feelings were just outside of my reach, a shadow in my thoughts I couldn't quite get to focus. A darkness that was forever within the periphery of my vision, yet it was something else that just wouldn't come into focus and it was infuriating the hell out of me.

An unknown feeling that all through the day, something had been just a little off. One of those - you could taste it but just not put your finger on it -- moments. For a second my revelry broke as I thought I heard something. Like glass striking metal as it slipped over the edge of the rail and yet when I turned to look, only my daughter stood inches from the rail itself.

When I went to move closer; Sophie was still unmoved. Standing by the railing between us and the sea, looking towards the lights of landfall. I heard her sigh, just then a slight breeze picked up and I could see Sophie's lips move but the breeze prevented me from hearing what she had said, as the breeze took her voice and thoughts towards the twinkling lights on the horizon.

"Are you okay little one?" I asked. Worried that she was so close to the edge, regardless of the rail.

Sophie turned her head towards me and a slight chill crept up my spine. A lump came to my throat making it difficult to breath. I knew it was impossible and most would think me insane, yet. With the lights from the cabin illuminating the balcony, for a split second I saw Victoria in my daughter's eyes.

"Daddy, are you ready for the next chapter in your life?"

The pause in my answer was only because I was fighting back the emotional rush and the tears. The breath I took calmed me to a point and my answer came from my thoughts before my mind could temper them for a small child to clearly understand.

"Oh sweetie, there are no chapters, just beginnings and ends." Came my only reply.

Sophie frowned, her mother's frown. I knew it was the closest my little Sophie could come to telling me off. I smiled at her and held out my hand, her own smile then came to her lips as we both walked back into the cabin.

*******

Three days later... Introductions.

Detective Shauna Franklin stood on the dockside. She just knew she should never have gotten out of bed this morning, perhaps if she hadn't her partner would still be alive. She and Rolland Harris had dropped by a convenience store so Rolland could get a soda. She waited in the car and a few minutes later two gunshots rang out. Rolland staggered through the door gun drawn bleeding from the chest. He staggered two more steps and collapse into Shauna's arms. The hospital worked on him for almost an hour before they called time.

They were all stood around the waiting area when the chief surgeon came to give his wife the news. Rolland's wife walked up to her and spat in her face, Shauna never moved. Her sons walking their mother out of the hospital. Rolland's wife screaming at Shauna that she was death incarnate and that everything she touches dies. She had begged Rolland not to be her partner but he wouldn't listen and now he was dead, it was all her fault.

A nurse came over and handed Shauna a tissue, she thanked her and wiped the spit away as she walked to the bathroom and threw up in one of the stalls. Shauna stayed for a few more minutes at the hospital; she was even allowed a final visit to see her late partner.

"I'm sorry Rolland." Her voice caught in her throat and she had to breathe in, deeper this time to overcome the emotions beating at her chest.

"I wish I could say more my friend, although I believe your wife truly told me how she felt." Her hand went to his, his body temperature fading slower with the warmth of the hospital. "If I could change anything my friend, it would be this. You didn't deserve this, good men like you deserve to live long and grow old badly."

Shauna had said her farewells and left the hospital, the screaming accusations of Rolland's wife still ringing in her thoughts. To Shauna, the drive was just a series of junctions, lights and honking horns from cars. She didn't even know where she was or even going, just the forward movement of her car.

Finally ending up at the dock, for a while she sat and watched the lights from the boats, remembering all too well Rolland's wife's last words to her. She shuddered and even now her own imagination felt the spit run down her face once again, coldness enveloped her. Her chest tightened to the point that she couldn't breathe properly. Shauna left the car, she needed the air.

Walking along the docks helped. She even sat on the edge of the dock her feet dangling over the edge. Shauna thought long and hard, perhaps Rolland's wife wasn't that far off the truth. Her Father died two months after she graduated from the academy from a heart attack, her first partner was Mack; he barely had six months left before retirement when they responded to a call. A high-speed chase of a stolen car, as they crossed a junction a truck hit the squad car side on, killing Mack instantly and putting Shauna in hospital for two months.

Her second partner lasted a year before some street hood walked up to the car pointed a shotgun through the driver's window into the car and blew his head off. Shauna managed to draw her gun and kill him but not before she took a shotgun blast to her own chest that totally destroyed her vest. She spent three months in hospital while the staff tried so hard to put her chest back together.

The surgeon went into great detail on the fact that if the killer had shot through the windshield they would have both been dead. Because he shot through the driver's door, it was instant for her partner, but the almost side on angle and her moving to grab her own weapon meant her body armor was at its least effective when the pellets from the shotgun found the seams and gaps between the plates in the vest.

Those same pellets found and tore to shreds her breasts and chest tissue. She was later offered reconstructive surgery but it was only Shauna who stood in front of a mirror after a shower and knew that from now on, no man would ever want to see this half-woman naked again. So why bother, scare tissue adorned her body from her lower neck to her stomach. It was only with the aid of a padded bra that made it look like there was a whole woman inside these clothes.

Another partner lasted a year before he was killed in action, by now Shauna had the reputation of having partners but never being around for their funerals.

Suddenly Shauna realized she had her service weapon in her hand. 'Perhaps it's time to visit Daddy.' She thought.

Shauna had her gun under her chin already cocked and thought to herself. "I could sure do with the rest. I'm just so damn tired."

She kept hearing a noise, but couldn't figure out what it was, it sure annoyed her. 'How's a girls supposed to kill herself around here with so much noise going on.' She thought.

Shauna holstered her weapon and went looking for the noise. There was a set a steps leading down to the water's edge, just off to the side of her that she hadn't noticed when she first sat down. Pulling a small torch off her belt she followed the noise, even in the gloom she could now see what the noise was. A rat was pushing a bottle up against one of the pillars of the dock.

In the semidarkness the light from her torch reflected off of the bottle, Shauna noticed there was something inside the bottle. She giggled to herself, 'a message in a bottle'. The rat ran for cover and she leaned in, picking up the bottle and walked back to her car. Leaning against the vehicle and her curiosity now at its peak, she opened the bottle and pulled the paper out. It was a picture of a man and a little girl, on the back in a child's handwriting was an address. What stopped Shauna in her tracks was the message under the address.

'Come see us Shauna.'

Shauna dropped the bottle; she didn't even hear it break. Her knees went weak and she fell to the ground, as the picture fluttered peacefully to the tarmac next to her. The message was still plain to see as it rested on the floor at her feet. Her eyes still staring at the message, those last four words pounded at her thoughts, giving her little in the way of a chance to form a perfectly logical reason why her name was on a message in a bottle and clearly written by a child.

Shauna's heart was beating so hard in her chest, the action of rubbing her chest in an effort to ease the building of anxiety within her simply didn't work, her cheeks were warm, her throat felt tight, to the point that for a good minute or so, she actually thought she was going to pass out.

So many questions in her mind screamed at her for answers. Again she looked at the address, from the dock it would take a little over an hour to get to it, she needed those answers. All this was impossible.

*******

A meeting of minds ...

It had been a long and peaceful day, with Sophie now at her Grandparents, the house felt so big and empty. This would be the first time Sophie would be gone for more than a weekend and even now I missed her madly. My thoughts although wistful were pulled back to reality by the gate buzzer, automatically I looked at the time, it was close to midnight. A fear instinctively rose in me as I reached for the intercom.

"Yes?"

"My name is Detective Shauna Franklin, of the New York Police department."

My own curiosity got the better of me, a New York Police officer?

"Would you please show your badge to the camera Detective?"

I quickly checked the other security cameras while she looked for her badge. Her car was the only one on the drive and the rest of the street was all but deserted. As the woman pulled out her badge and placed it within reading distance of the camera I felt a cold sweat.

Why is a New York Detective at my gate at this hour?

I buzzed her in and opened the front door, watching her car pull up on the driveway alongside the front of the house, as she got out of the car. Cold fear made me reach for the door frame to stop myself from falling.

"Detective you're covered in blood, has something happened to Sophie?"

The detective stopped dead in her tracks and looked down at her top, she gulped and then shook her head. The smile was there but it seemed too rehearsed, a way of putting me at ease. Something else happened just then, she blushed and for a second she didn't seem to know what to do.

"I assume Sophie is your little girl and no, to the best of my knowledge nothing has happened to her. I apologies for my clothes but I was impatient to get here. I realize I should have changed but its part of why I'm here. May we talk inside?"

My thoughts started to calm and now I felt embarrassed that a total stranger had come to my door and in such a manner that instantly made me suspect negative thoughts.

The detective held something in her hand, it was clear to see the confusion on her face. She took another step forward and almost stumbled, she looked down at her feet in confusion, while I stood by the door, feeling that something wasn't right.

The detective looked up at me and started to speak, her eyes had watered up and reflected against the backlight of the house, her step once again faltered. "I just need to understand, I'm confused by this and I just want to understand."

I watched in shock as she then crumpled to the ground.

*******

When Shauna woke, confusion came first, she didn't recognize the room, or the bed she was in. Her service weapon was still holstered and resting on a small cabinet alongside her badge. A folded piece of paper leant up against a bottle of water, it had 'Read Me' written on it. She smiled and slowly leaned over to do just that, it was then that she realized she was dressed in nothing more than a man's T-shirt.

Her first instinct was to touch her chest, she felt the cotton of the shirt in the palm of her hand, the scars across her chest were all too familiar and with a shrug of her shoulders, she ignored her instincts and continued to lean over and take hold of the note.

'You collapsed on my drive, I carried you into my home and called a friend who is also my family's doctor. You have exhaustion on a level he has never seen before and suggests you stay in bed, even after reading this.

Your cell is charging on the stand on the cabinet opposite you, my number is on a piece of paper next to it. Ring me when you want company, otherwise I will check on you as I have done since you have been here, on the hour, every hour.'

Although she was certain she had read the note correctly, she stumbled over the words. On the hour, every hour? Just how long had she had been out for? It was her body's turn to remind her of the truth to that statement when the urge to go to the bathroom became all important. Scanning the room, she could see the edge of a bath through the half open door to the right of her, pulled the covers back and with tentative steps, she walked into the bathroom, yet even that felt like she had run a half-marathon.

Sitting down was a welcome relief, her bathroom rituals took on a life of their own as she sat breathing deeply.

A man's voice came through the still half open bathroom door. "When you're done I will throw a robe in, or your gun, whichever you think is the priority at the moment." She jumped but her own body chose to continue her bathroom rituals, despite the interruption.

The man's voice she recognized instantly, she couldn't see him and since her body was still doing what it needed to do, she doubted very much that she could defend herself if he entered.

Looking down at herself for a moment and then shrugging, according to the note she had been looked after by this man since she collapsed. He would have had plenty of opportunity to look at everything.

So with a deep breath inhaled and let out, Shauna said. "The bathrobe would be welcome please; when I woke, I found the need to use the bathroom far outweighed the need for modesty, plus I doubt my service weapon is loaded anyway."

She heard a rustle and then an arm came into the bathroom and draped the robe over the edge of the bath, the door then closed slightly taking the arm and then hand with it.

"Your weapon is loaded, but only because my daughter isn't here, had she been, then I would have unloaded it."

There was a pause and then the voice continued.

"I will leave you to your personal time; Cook has prepared a high-protein breakfast for you. I will go and get it; I will also make sure that journey takes twenty minutes."

I heard the officer laugh, it sounded genuine. It also made me smile when I heard it.

The voice from the bathroom said. "If you take that long I may have to come looking for you. Will five minutes' tops do?"

My smile never left my lips as I confirmed her target time and left the bedroom, making more noise closing the bedroom door than I normally would.

*******

The devil in me made it six minutes, she was sat up in bed tapping her wrist and looking at a watch that wasn't there. I got the point and smiled right alongside her.

"Hey, it's a big house not to mention that Cook rarely lets me into the kitchen since I've been known to burn water when I attempt to make a meal for myself."

I placed the tray on her lap and stood back.

Her eyebrow lifted a little, I'd seen that same thing with my daughter, just before she tried to be all adult.

"So you call your staff by their job titles?"