Divine Modernity: Hercules Therapy

Hercules, son of Zeus and one of the few Greek legends who had sided with humanity during the God War, hesitated in front of the simple wooden door. He had wrestled the Nemean lion, battled the Hydra, confronted the Amazons and survived the wrath of Hera herself. Opening an office door should not have felt like another labor and yet as he turned the knob, he felt his legendary courage and strength bleed away.

"Ah, Mister Heracles. Welcome. I was worried you weren't going to make this appointment." said the beautiful woman he had come to see.

She had long, brown hair with sublime natural curl, eyes that sparkled with the color of healthy soil behind a thin pair of spectacles and the lightest bit of red lipstick that was the only makeup on her face. The sight of her made him both nervous and soothed all at the same time, though he'd never tell her that. She sat on a plush armchair as she silently gestured to the chaise longue set up against the wall.

"It's Hercules actually, doctor." he gently corrected her as he laid back on the offered furniture, "I had it legally changed almost as soon as legal name changes were invented."

"I see. Well I apologize if I offended and I'll make sure that all the paperwork is under your correct name from now on." the therapist said softly as she scribbled something down on her notepad.

Hercules stared up at the ceiling as his therapist performed whatever paperwork she had to deal with before they began the session. His dreams had been growing worse lately and Morpheus was far too imprisoned these days to be able to help him sleep an entire night through. Mortal medicines didn't work and he hadn't been able to get drunk since he turned 300. He was desperate to find a little peace outside of a battlefield after all these years.

"Now you wrote that the reason you sought out therapy with me was because of a lack of sleep. Is there a reason you chose therapy specifically to deal with this issue?" she began.

"My lack of sleep is caused by nightmares. I cannot kill the monsters of my mind doctor, even with my strength. I used to seek the aid of the god Morpheus but he's been imprisoned indefinitely for his actions during the God War. I... cannot overcome this myself. So I have come to you." he explained.

"There is no shame or weakness in seeking help when you need it, even for a god." she told him sternly, "I can and will do everything in my power to aid you, so that you can overcome those things in your mind which hold so much power over you."

"You speak as though my mind is a battlefield, doctor."

"In a way, it is. Like you said, you cannot kill the monsters of your mind but that doesn't mean that you can't battle them. These kinds of monsters exist in everybody, though they're very rarely the same kind of monsters. Does that make sense?" she asked.

"The different monsters part but how do you battle something you cannot kill? How can you defeat something that does not die?" Hercules wondered.

"You don't need to kill an opponent to defeat them, Hercules. Many opponents can be defeated many different ways. Enemies can become allies, opponents can be rendered unconscious and armies can be starved until they vacate an area, can't they?" Megara pointed out and Hercules had to admit that she was correct, so he nodded.

"Am I to understand that you wish me to starve the enemies of my mind?" he asked her.

"Maybe but first, we need to identify the enemy. If you don't mind me saying, I've actually used the examples of your mythological battles with other patients to help them understand that knowledge is the first key to victory. If the enemy of your mind is like the Hydra, growing back stronger no matter how many times you cut it down, then yes. You need to starve that enemy instead of feeding it your aggression." she said as she maintained unbroken eye contact.

"I crushed the Hydra with a lot of very large boulders. I did not starve it to death." he corrected her.

"Not the point." she said with a very quiet groan.

Hercules couldn't help but laugh at her frustration, just as he couldn't help correcting her. So many people got so many details of his life wrong that he simply couldn't take it anymore. Speaking up had become a reflex.

"My apologies, Doctor. I do get your point though. First, we identify the enemy, then we form a strategy, and finally we defeat the enemy." he said with a tired smile.

"Yes, that's very much it." she acknowledged, "So why don't we start with something simple? Tell me a little about yourself."

"Haven't you ever read Greek Mythology? I'm pretty famous." Hercules said cheekily.

"I want to hear it from you. Get your personal experience with it and not just what somebody else wrote after the fact." Megara explained softly.

"Very well," he agreed with a heavy sigh, "I am technically the product of a sexual assault. My mother was tricked into laying with Zeus when he shape shifted into her husband using divine power. His wife, Hera, was furious that he had once again cheated on her with another woman and did everything in her power to prevent my birth. Thanks to a clever maid, who got turned into a weasel for her trouble, my birth was successful after a very long and agonizing labor. Hera then spent the rest of my mortal life making me miserable and trying to get me killed."

"I get the sense you aren't really comfortable talking about your life with me yet." Megara said as she jotted a few things down on her notepad.

"Which one?" Hercules replied with a scoff.

"Considering you only spoke to me about your mortal life, I can't really say but please know that this is a safe place to speak your mind." she told him gently as she regained eye contact with the reluctant god, "Though if I may ask something?"

"Yes, Doctor?"

"I asked you to tell me about yourself. You could have started with anything. Your hobbies, your recent troubles sleeping, your relationships... yet you told me first about the circumstances of your birth. Could you tell me why?" she asked.

Hercules blinked, unable to really answer her. He hadn't even thought to talk about himself as he was now. He had gone straight to the beginning of a literal eternity of misery and had thought nothing of it. It had been automatic.

"I... I have no idea." he admittedly slowly.

"Would it be alright if I offered an educated guess as to why I think you did so?" she asked.

"I did come here for aid and insight." he said with the cocky grin he had become famous for back in ancient Greece.

"Hercules, I feel that you may define yourself by your pain. That while others remember the tales passed down through myth, your memory of those events focus on the pain that surrounded them. Do you feel that I may be wrong?" Megara offered.

Hercules thought slowly and methodically about her words. He recalled every single one of the major events of his life, up to the end of the God War and tried to focus on his feelings in every one of them. Megara was correct, but thankfully not entirely. The pain, whether physical or emotional, always crept to the forefront of his mind but it was rarely the only thing there. His heart still shattered whenever he recalled the fate of his first wife and their children but it didn't completely destroy the joy he had when he first realized he truly loved her or when he had held each of his children for the first time.

"Mister Hercules, are you alright?" Megara asked him back in the present.

His thoughts snapped back and as the modern world came back into focus, he realized that he felt wetness on his cheeks. He wiped his face and realized that he had begun to cry without even realizing it. He took a moment to try and compose himself as he searched for the words he wanted to say.

"I am as alright as I can be, I suppose. I was mulling over your words and realized you are at least partially correct. My pain... is a large part of me. More so than it probably should be, but it is not the only thing inside of me. I can still recall..." he choked up, unable to continue as memories of happiness that had been cruelly ripped away assaulted him.

"It's okay." she assured him softly, "there's no need to try and rush anything. We may only be scheduled for a half hour at a time, but we can have as many sessions as you need until you finally feel like you don't need me anymore."

"And if that never comes, Doctor? Am I to be broken forever?" he asked as he wiped away yet more tears.

"You may live forever, Hercules, but that also gives you infinite time to heal. You will not be broken forever unless you choose to be. Not now that you've finally decided to confront your problems." Megara answered confidently.

"So then what precisely is my problem, Doctor?" he wondered.

"What I'm seeing in your body language and what we've talked about so far has led me to believe that you might be under the effects of what we call Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Now I can't guarantee that's what the issue is but it does fit everything I've learned so far. I can help, if you'll let me." Megara explained, her voice calm despite the fire in her eyes.

He remembered that fire all too well. He had seen it countless times after all, in each and every single one of her lives. He saw it that first night all those centuries ago where she refused to give herself to him until he treated her with respect. She was a gentle soul with the heart of a warrior, just as she was back when she was his first wife.

He smiled softly as he looked at her, at her determination. He had sought her out and looked after her for every single one of her reincarnations once Shiva had explained the concept to him. He would never again make the mistake of openly loving her but he would never allow her to suffer as she had at his hands again. It warmed his heart that she seemed to regard him much the same way, even if she had no idea who she had once been.

"I think I would like that very much, Doctor."