Drow's Dilemma Ep. 148: Alchemistry

"Selene, obviously," Althaia said, squirming a bit. Her purple eyes were back on Aster's almost desperate attempt to pleasure her master and gain his attention.

Selene let out a long, annoyed sigh. "I don't want to be Matron. I never wanted to be Matron. I want to continue to work in the research and engineering departments. I feel my talents are much better spent there especially considering my recent powerup."

Ashyr's lips thinned in an awkward expression.

Althaia took a deep breath, closing her eyes and steadying herself. Tearing her lustful gaze from the amazing scene of Aster riding Caleldir while he tried to pretend that she was not, she made herself focus on Selene. "How old are you, Selene?"

"A century and a half by surface standards," Selene replied warily.

"And how long do you plan on living?" Althaia inquired.

"Until-" Selene began to say immediately, then apparently changed what she was going to reply. "Er, until I grow tired of the mortal realm."

"Well, then you can take sixteen years out of that very long period to occasionally go to state events and look proud," Althaia said with a big smile. "It would be hard for you to shirk your work as Matron more than Ashyr already does."

Ashyr continued to look awkward, though her expression took on a bit of guilt now. Caleldir could not stifle a laugh, though with Aster attempting to overwhelm him with pleasure his laugh sounded a bit strange.

"You have a point," Selene agreed as she gave Ashyr a Look. "Fine. Then I will take on that temporary mantle. Only until Iondae, Sidhriia, or Ashyr's unborn can be chosen as a more permanent leader."

"Good, that's settled!" Althaia said quickly. She strode over to Selene and pulled her to her feet, then started pushing her towards Caleldir and Aster. "Now, let's fuck."

Selene spun out of Althaia's forceful movements and glared at the nymph. Then she unclasped her robe to reveal her full, unconcealed form. Finally, she stalked over to Caleldir under her own power. Ashyr laughed at her cousin before she gleefully joined Caleldir and Aster on their couch.

---

"It's not safe! Can't be trusted inside!" Carlotta muttered as she furiously ground her mixture into a fine, smooth paste. Her voluminous red hair bounced with the force of her grinding, periodically revealing the nose of a curious rat perched on her shoulder.

An enthusiastic sizzle-steaming startled the redhead. "Oh shit," she muttered as she whipped around and pulled the boiling-over potatoes off of the camp stove. She dropped the pot more violently than she intended. The human recoiled from the boiling water that splashed up at her. "I'm stuck here being a fucking camp wife and battling potatoes instead of adventuring! I was promised an adventure going with her, but nooo. I'm too damned weak!"

Carlotta flopped down onto a log with a huff. After her rat adjusted to the sudden change in altitude, it pushed through her wild curls and nuzzled at her freckled cheek. With a sigh, the human stroked the little creature's body. "And now I spend more time with you, Alkali, than I do my own girlfriend. That Slas guy is too impressive. He drags her on missions that are far too dangerous."

She looked over her forest camp, so different from the distillery that she ran in Druid's Town way back when she first met Ashyr and Caleldir. And then there was the new brewery that she had set up in Norahist when she came up with the rest of the druid leader's faction... All she had to work with now was a travel kit and her grandfather's book on alchemy. "Maybe I should have just stayed with the druids..."

The alchemist's reverie was interrupted by a break in reality. A few yards away space began to distort and twist before it outright shattered into the form of a large gate. Oily tentacles of emerald fire and eldritch wisps of alien energy swirled out from the center. On the other side of the door was a realm that Carlotta could not look at without giving her immediately debilitating migraines and temporary blindness. What little image she could recall seemed like a starfield and glowing nebula was on the other side. And boobs. Moon-sized, bouncy boobs caressed by flaming tentacles. Whatever... cosmic entity lurking on the other side was female in some fashion.

Distinct from the entity on the Other side, a massive figure she had seen once before stepped through. A succubus, twelve foot tall with royal purple skin, silver-snow hair that nearly trailed on the ground behind her high-heeled shoes, eyes of glowing divine gold, and a body with a figure as bombastically sensuous as it was inhumanly elegant. Her outfit was black-and-purple leather lingerie with obsidian spikes that matched the sheen of her massive wings and shapely horns. Behind fluttered a great trailing cloak that was black on the outside and had a field of stars on the inside. She wore a crown of purple jewels that floated above her head.

The Empress of Souls had gone through several power boosts since she had released the human alchemist from the orb on top of that staff she carried.

"Thank you, father," she told the portal in a voice of utter imperial confidence dripping with sensuality, as well as genuine affection. "Please bear with my demands for a bit. I will visit you properly very soon."

[It is my profound pleasure to see you back, my precious daughter,] a deeply creepy set of echoing voices slimed around the encampment, as rumblingly deep as they were hissingly feminine. [Five thousand years is but a blink to me, the great Azathahuga, but still, I missed you. Providing you transportation is no inconvenience at all. Give my regards to Sharazhem, Mnarlyuthia, Daghatheama, and the rest.] The tentacles retracted, and the portal snapped shut.

"I know your name, dad," Vilinixia Violetcrown said in an amused tone. "Are you showing off for the audience again? How very meta!" She looked off into the distance, fixing some random point with a wink and a grin. "The fourth wall is important, after all! Show don't tell and all that. It breaks immersion if we just address the audience directly!"

After saying her piece to no one, the Empress turned to Carlotta and gave her a dazzling smile. "My sincere apologies, little one. Due to my new Mistress's plans, I am limited as to how I can travel. I was forced to rely on some ancient... allies for transportation." The ancient succubus took a seat in mid-air, her long, sinuous tail twitching around her as if feeling out the air. Her expression took on a sympathetic, pensive look, and she leaned towards Carlotta, her mountainous breasts hanging down distractingly. "You seem upset, young alchemist. What causes this distress?"

"Uhh..." Carlotta said, dumbstruck. She temporarily forgot all her woes in the face of such a terrifyingly impressive Entity in front of her. It took her a moment to regain her words. By that time, she forgot that The Empress asked her a question. "You, uh, got bigger, my lady. And... More."

Her girlfriend, Cieraela, didn't like Empress Violetcrown very much, or so she repeated to Carlotta multiple times. Carlotta always assumed that she was exaggerating; her girlfriend didn't like succubi after she escaped being turned into one and had to turn herself cyborg to fight the change. Carlotta's dealings with this succubus were a very brief imprisonment that she didn't even remember and then a friendly goodbye after being freed.

Still, Empress Violetcrown looked terrifying to the small human. It took the ancient succubus a few seconds to register this, then she pulled back and grinned apologetically. "Oh! Of course! My true form is a bit too overwhelming for a mortal. My apologies!"

Vilinixia took a deep breath, then slowly let it out, deflating as she did so until she was a mere six feet in height, her garments pulled into a simple black minidress with a supernaturally distracting amount of cleavage on display, and her skin turned from royal purple to a pleasant, earthy brown. With her horns, tail, and wings pulled into her body, she looked like a wood elf or perhaps a dryad from the far south. She took a demure seat on a stump about ten feet away from Carlotta, fixing her with brilliantly gold eyes. "Is that better, my darling?"

The young alchemist shook herself. Even with the more normal-looking humanoid in front of her, it was difficult to forget the impressive succubus form. "That is... less overwhelming," Carlotta responded, not wanting to call the mundane form 'better.' "Now, er... what was it you wanted to ask me?"

"Several things," Vilinixia began, once more leaning forward until her breasts hung down distractingly. She put her elbows on her knees and held her chin in her hands. "I wanted to start with asking you why you seem so distressed. Did the lovely cyborg succubus leave you behind again?"

"Oh, that. She promised me adventure! And we did adventure for a while and it was great. Then her ambitions got ahead of her and now I'm just doing what I've always done with worse facilities and no place for long-term projects!" Carlotta responded, quick to rant about what had been annoying her for weeks now.

"Do you think that this is a permanent change or just the result of a temporary project?" Vilinixia asked. "Once her current mission is over and the pressure is off, you should tell her how you feel and ask her to go on a mission that you can help with."

"Oh, it's only gotten worse with him around now. Before, it was already getting bad. It was always 'we'll find something for you next time' and 'I just can't pass up the opportunity, you understand!' But next time comes and it's another that I can't handle!"

"Him?" Vilinixia tilted her head. "Which of the demigods in her life are you referring to? The half-nymph she has a desperate desire for or the thief she views as a father figure?"

"It wouldn't be so bad if it was Caleldir! Then Ashyr would be around too and she always had time to party. It's the thief. The Thief. The one who wants to be a god. And yeah, sure, I'm certain that they'll succeed and it's all very exciting and important. I need to feel valued too, you know?" Carlotta stood and began to pace back and forth in front of the succubus, gesticulating wildly.

"I can see on your character sheet that your orientation is written as 'strictly homosexual', but I am afraid that your bisexual girlfriend prefers men to women romantically. She does like you a lot, I can tell, but she is only a child, really. You are barely more than a child, and she is younger than you. She is immature, inexperienced, and selfish out of a lack of wisdom more than any maliciousness. She will have to grow a lot before she is able to understand your needs, and she will always pine after the man she cannot have more than she will consider you." Vilinixia's expression took on a very sympathetic tinge. "So, knowing all that, do you still love her?"

"Uhh..." Carlotta hesitated. Some of the succubus's words didn't make sense. At least she understood the question, though. "Love Cieraela? I've only been with her a little while. I admire her. I think she's sexy. I was sold on the adventuring aspect. Love..." Carlotta shrugged. "I don't know."

"Well... she is listed as a 'crush' on your character sheet," Vilinixia said. "A 'potential love interest'." The succubus sat up properly, tilting her head again and studying Carlotta. "Carlotta Sundial. Neutral Good. Alchemist level 10. Artisan level 8. Human level 5. Intelligence 19, Wisdom 14, Charisma 15, Strength 11, Constitution 14, and Dexterity 16. Really, in most places of this world, you would be phenomenal. Your feats are a bit haphazard and unoptimized, and you have not made nearly enough use of your crafting abilities or selected all of your artisan features, but you have an excellent overall build.

"But..." she let out a long breath. "Cieraela of Coillgaeta is a Chaotic Good Rogue/Fighter/Conceptual Thief/Technologist Human/Succubus/Cyborg. While her levels in those lines are widespread, she is much, much more powerful than you, and possesses Mythic Tiers. You have to in order to take levels in the Conceptual Thief prestige class. Really, her abilities are such that you are a straight-out liability to her. She does not think of you that way, but she knows it instinctively. She likes you, even loves you to an extent, and wants to protect you. Because, face it, Carlotta. You are an ordinary human of unusual talent who got herself pulled into a tale of gods, demons, ancient evils, and world-shattering curses. You are a mid-level character swept into an epic campaign of mythic proportions."

The human blinked, her mouth hanging half-open. This succubus had access to knowledge that normal beings did not. Probably had something to do with whatever that horrifying entity was. The... thing that spoke when she first showed up.

The succubus looked at her with sympathy. "That all said, you have great potential. Truly, truly great potential."

"Uhm. Well. Er. I'm... I'm not going to meet that if I keep getting left behind here," Carlotta finally managed to say.

"If you died in a dungeon meant for level 18+ characters, you would not meet your potential either," Vilinixia said sympathetically. The ancient succubus clapped her hands together. "But! That is why I am here. To help you."

Her tail snaked out a few dozen feet, scooped a mouse up, and pulled it back to herself. The small, grey-furred squeaked angrily at being taken, but Vilinixia gently stroked it and the creature settled down.

"Cute, isn't it?" she asked.

Carlotta heard stories about this sort of thing. It started with sacrificing mice and ended in sacrificing children... but maybe that wasn't what Violetcrown was getting at. The small human couldn't help imagining the worst things possible after the images of eldritch abominations burned into her mind during The Empress's entrance.

"It is very cute... I'm glad you found it; it was getting into our food," Carlotta said cautiously.

"True, true..." Vilinixia mused. "At this size, it does not eat very much..." She looked back up at Carlotta. "The Bouquet Domination increased their power by creating succubi. Like Cieraela. But not everyone should be a succubus. If everyone had horns and bad wings and spade-tipped tails, those traits would not be special, you know?"

The succubus turned her gaze back to the mouse. "This mouse is weak, you know? Much weaker than a human. But it can be stronger. And cuter. So much cuter..."

Vilinixia took a deep breath and set the now sleeping mouse down on the stump she had been sitting on. She blew a long, windy breeze filled with silvery gold spirit energy over it.

The mouse shivered, mutated, and grew to the size of a halfling. As it did, its shape became distinctly humanoid and distinctly female. Soon, a small, curvy, beautiful woman with shaggy grey hair, mouse ears, a long mousy tail, and mouse-like, excessively cute features lay on the stump. She opened her eyes, and sat up, looking sleepy and confused.

"Wha... what happened?" the mouse asked, rubbing her eyes. "I was trying to eat and..." She gasped and covered her mouth. "I... I talked! I understand things! And I'm big now!"

The succubus hit the mouse woman with a ray, and she fell back asleep. "I will help her adjust later," she said casually. She turned towards Carlotta. "Well? What do you think of my 'eldritch mouse sacrifice'?"

Carlotta's hanging jaw snapped shut. "You turned her humanoid!"

"I did a bit more than that, but yes," the Empress said proudly. She gestured towards Carlotta, or rather, towards Alkali. "Your rat is lovely. May I see him?" Her golden eyes flitted over the rest of Carlotta's set-up. "And... your tome of alchemical recipes. It is two hundred years old, right? A priceless family heirloom, passed down through generations of Sundials? May I see that as well?"

"Er, so that's permanent?" Carlotta said, drawing back a little and clasping her book to her chest. "And you can do that to books? How will I access the information? I- well, the mouse is incredibly adorable, but..." She didn't seem sure.

"Easily," Vilinixia declared. "You will easily access the information."

Alkali, however, was intrigued. As he was as near-sighted as any rat, he didn't get the full effect of the eldritch horror. It scrambled down Carlotta's chest and cautiously approached the succubus.

"I've, uh, done some modifications to him already," Carlotta sheepishly admitted. "But I could only augment his mental stats to a certain level." Which was to say that she didn't exactly want to give permission, but if he wanted to go...

"Ah, I see. You turned him into your familiar," Vilinixia observed. She picked up the rat and pet his silver fur a few times. Then, she put him down on the ground and stepped away. Once more, she breathed out a breeze of silver-gold wispy energy.

Alkali swelled in size and shape, turning into a tall, lanky yet buxom, mischievous-looking young woman. The only fur left on her body was the silver on the outside of rat-like ears. Like the mouse, her facial features were reminiscent of her original form in the most attractive way possible. Her short-cropped hair was the same silver that her fur had been. The tip of a hairless tail wrapped around an ankle as bare as the rest of her body. Neither she nor the mouse transformed with clothing.

"Well! Alkali dear, how do you like your new form?" Vilinixia crooned towards the rat-woman.

"My package seems to have moved," Alkali commented, laughingly groping her new breasts.

"It's a distinctly feminine energy, then..." Carlotta mused to herself. "Logical. Psychology already suited to gender reassignment."

"Anyway!" Vilinixia clapped her hands together once again. "May I see your alchemy tome? Do not worry, you will still be able to read her. Just... trust me on this." She spun her staff, and it transformed into a very proud-looking woman. Tall and thin, but very top-heavy, her appearance in build, clothing, and coloration echoed the appearance of the staff perfectly. The staff spirit sniffed and turned back into her inanimate form, which Vilinixia picked back up. "Don't mind her. She is just sulking. Apparently, my revivifying her after the gods deanimated her soul five thousand years ago is not enough to make her forgive me for... things. Nothing you need worry about. At least she still does her work as my best weapon."

"Can I turn back into a rat at will, then? Ugh, or will I be stupid again?" Alkali asked while Carlotta hesitatingly offered her tome towards the succubus.

Vilinixia took the alchemy tome from Carlotta with her elongating tail, not closing the gap between the two of them. "You can take a rat form eventually, but it will take some magical skill that you do not have yet," the ancient succubus informed Alkali. "It is not an automatic ability."

Once more, the Empress gently ran her fingers across the old, well-worn, leather-bound heirloom book of alchemical recipes. She opened it and flipped through the pages, smiling fondly. "I see that you have some significant artistic talent and calligraphic skills running in your family. This book is very lovely."

She set the book down in mid-air, where it floated, gently bobbing up and down and twisting. "And when she awakens, she will be grateful for the generations of love you have already given her."

Another silver-gold stream of energy flowed from her fingers, and the book shifted into a beautiful purple-eyed young woman in a sensual leather alchemist's outfit with goggles perched on her red hair. She looked for all the world like Carlotta's sister.

"Clothed," Carlotta observed. She touched the hem of the book's jacket. "Same leather of the cover." The alchemist looked back at Empress Violetcrown. "This is all very fascinating and I can see why this would give me a small power boost, but... what are you getting at, My Lady?"