Eleanor's Valentine's Day Wish

But this was Eleanor's show. With the white tablecloth, linen napkins and our wedding china and crystal adorning our dining room table, this was indeed more than the usual Eleanor special. Seductive smells were wafting about as Eleanor fussed over her dinner. Kasey and I made small talk as banging noises from the kitchen punctuated our conversation.

Even though Kasey had first met me under unusual circumstances which almost caused the end of my relationship with Eleanor [ed. note: Grounded in Toronto, Ch. 05-07], we reconnected and surprisingly Eleanor wasn't jealous, but instead welcomed Kasey into our home with open arms. Over the years we both came to love Kasey's wit, charm and drop dead good looks.

Kasey became more open with me when she relayed the details of her break-up with Janice, a long-time lover and submissive. She was quite introspective in observing, "It just seemed like Janice and I began to grow apart. Her need and appetite for submission became greater and more urgent. Over the years the attraction of being a Domme just didn't hold for me. Being responsible for all of the decisions started to weigh on me, and not in a good way. I think I'm going to take a break for a while from any relationships and sort this out in my mind."

That was a mouthful from Kasey. I thought about what she said before responding.

"Perhaps it's just a phase you went through and now you're looking for a more balanced relationship."

"Yes, that's probably so," noted the statuesque redhead. "I want to try something different."

At that point Eleanor marched into the room triumphant, bearing her favorite dutch oven and a wonderful pot roast with potatoes and carrots and plenty of gravy made from the meat drippings.

"Bravo," Kasey and I clamored as we saw the delicious food put before us.

Eleanor took a bow before taking her seat. She also dressed for the occasion, wearing her honey blonde hair in her trademark chignon, her apron covering a new red dress. She untied her apron and took it off, showing us her new dress with a spin before she sat down.

We had a wonderful dinner, punctuated with saucy tales from Kasey about the submissive acts Janice engaged in with Kasey and my anecdotes from the road from my many business trips. We plowed through the meal and two bottles of wine before we put our forks and knives down. Eleanor took the opportunity of the lull to capture our undivided attention.

"You're my two favorite gals," she said in a surprisingly somber tone of voice. I suddenly felt a chill go up my spine.

"I'm dying. I have inoperable breast cancer."

There was a deafening silence.

Kasey started to sniffle.

I stared forward, my eyes wide open. I felt a wet film form over my eyes and a tear trickle down my cheek.

"What . . ." I said, breaking the stunned silence.

"The doctors don't know how long I have to live. It might be a few months, it might be a few years."

"No," I said emphatically. "You must have it wrong." Kasey slowly nodded.

"I've already consulted two doctors."

"When . . ."

"About two months ago. I had a routine mammogram when they found the lump. It's been biopsied and there's no doubt of what I have. The problem is it's already spread to most of my vital organs."

All three of us were crying at that point. I can't you tell you how long that lasted but Eleanor put a stop to it.

"Girls. I didn't bring you both here to just share this bad news. I wanted the two of you to be together after I'm gone."

I immediately responded. "No. You're not dying and I'm not leaving you."

"I am and you will. You'll have no choice because I won't be here."

"But ... but ... I love you."

"But you'll learn to love another."

"I don't want to."

"You will."

"Why now?"

"I want to be able to see the love between the two of you grow and flourish. Nothing would give me greater pleasure. I know that years ago you and Kasey almost ran off without me. You clearly have an attraction to each other and the bond we've created over the past few years is strong. There is no doubt in my mind that love will blossom between the two of you. I can feel it in my bones."

"Eleanor, I'm not going to be a party to this discussion," I said emphatically. 'I want to find out what your treatment options are and focus on making you better."

"I expected as much from you but I wanted to tell the two of you on my terms. Will the two of you at least think about what I've said?"

"Of course. But it's silly talk," I stated.

Kasey was more emphatic. "Eleanor, this isn't the time to talk about life after you're gone."

I took Eleanor into my arms. We hugged. The three of us hugged. We cried together until there were more tears to give.

The next morning I wanted to believe that last evening was simply a bad dream. Eleanor was sleeping by my side, looking as peaceful as ever, snoring softly. I pulled her to me and placed her head on my lap, stroking her hair. Half asleep, she put her arms around me and resumed her snoring.

As I was cradling her head the harsh reality of Eleanor's condition set in. My first reaction was grief. My second was fear. My third was anger.

It wasn't my finest moment. I was mad at the world. My life was perfect and now that life was being taken away from me. Sure, life wasn't fair, but I always thought that rule applied to others, not to me. How could the woman I had shared my soul with be taken away so soon? Unfortunately it was those nearby that bore the brunt of my anger, and that meant Eleanor and Kasey.

The next few weeks I was an insufferable bitch. I lashed out indiscriminately to anyone within earshot and without reason. I wanted to find someone to blame. Obviously there was blame to be assigned. But to whom?

As expected, both of the doctor's reports reached the same conclusion. The spread of cancer was too broad to hope for a cure. The best they could do was prescribe a regimen of radiation and chemotherapy that would slow the progress of the cancer down. Eleanor embarked on a two month program that required her to visit the hospital three times a week for treatment. Kasey and I took on the lion's share of the work, ferrying Eleanor to her appointments.

Word of her illness quickly travelled to Eleanor's fan base. We started getting cards and letters wishing her well. Eleanor spent hours each day patiently answering e-mails and texts. There were also the occasional visitors. Eleanor's London-based editors made a surprise appearance during a West Coast business trip. Other locally based fans stopped by when Eleanor was feeling up to accepting callers.

I was crushed and disconsolate, trying to put on a good face for Eleanor but failing.

Eleanor was the brave one. She faced up to her treatments like a trooper, often trying to entertain me instead of the other way around. It wasn't soon before Eleanor lost her hair and also her appetite. I couldn't remember the last time we made love. Fall was suddenly on us, and the change of seasons and the dropping of the leaves signaled a change for Eleanor as well. Her spirits started to wane. Kasey and I tried to raise her spirits but nothing we did seem to piece her somber mood.

Eleanor had said little about the conversation we had the day she told us she had cancer. But I knew it was weighing on her and the words she uttered suddenly began to sink in. I would be alone soon. I was young, then only in my late 30's, and would have another life ahead of me. I looked over at Kasey. She was great over the past few months, helping us in any way she could, and spending as much time as she could with Eleanor.

One fall evening Eleanor and I were sharing a quiet dinner together when I finally mustered the courage to broach her Valentine's Day wish.

"Eleanor, why do you think Kasey is the one for me?"

Eleanor paused and then smiled. "I was wondering when you were going to ask. It took you long enough. You already love Kasey. You just don't know it. I've watched the two of you together over the years. As you know, your relationship with one another started with a bang. There was an unmistakable sexual attraction between the two of you. Also, you respect each other. My illness could have put an untenable stress on your friendship with Kasey. But instead, the two of you have drawn closer together. I don't think I could have made it this far without Kasey's help, and of course yours."

Did I love Kasey already? Eleanor might be right. Eleanor was certainly right about the last few months. There was so much to do, I'm not sure how I could have gotten it all done without Kasey being by my side.

I had always had a residual attraction to Kasey after the brief tryst in our house, but my love for Eleanor and the passage of the years made the memories of those heated moments fade to a blur. It had been over six months since Eleanor made her request and yet neither Kasey nor I had acted on it. I decided to break the ice in a last ditch effort to reach Eleanor.

The next time Kasey was over the two of us visited Eleanor while she was sitting in the bedroom. The chemo that morning was particularly harsh and Eleanor felt poorly. I felt awful. It was heartbreaking to see the love of my life rapidly declining in health. Standing in front of Eleanor I announced, "Kasey and I are going out on a date."

Eleanor's eyes lit up and she suddenly became alert. "Finally. What caused your change of heart?"

"You wanted me to do this and Kasey agreed, right Kasey?"

Of course I acted on the spur of the moment and hadn't clued in Kasey. She turned to me to mouth "WTF?" but then said to Eleanor, "That's right. Camille and I are going out on a date."

"That's great Kasey. What are you going to do?"

Kasey looked to me. "Camille, it was your idea. Where are we going?"

Kasey was the sly one. She knew we were winging it and had now pitched the ball back to me. "Uh ... uh ... we're going to go to dinner and a movie," I improvised.

Eleanor nodded her head in satisfaction. "I expect you girls to report back to me."

"Yes ma'am," we both replied. We both kissed her on the cheek, much to her delight.

We left the bedroom together, then talking once we were outside of earshot of Eleanor.

"What was that?" Kasey asked in a sharp tone.

"Uh ... I feel like we've tried everything when it comes to cheering up Eleanor and we've come up dry. Did you see her face when I told her that the two of us were going out on a date?"

"Yeah, that was great. But I still feel really weird about this."

"Hey, what harm is it if we go to dinner and a movie? It seems like it really lifted Eleanor's spirits."

"I suppose," conceded the tall redhead, "but where is this going to lead?"

"Kasey, let's just do this for Eleanor. I'm not expecting anything to happen."

Kasey shrugged her shoulders and pivoted to leave. "I'll see you tonight, here at 7?"

"That's fine, " I shouted. "What were we getting into?" I thought.

I went back into our bedroom. Eleanor was reading a book and put it on her lap when I walked in.

"Did Kasey leave?"

"Yes. She went home."

Eleanor always knew what was up. "So what did the two of you talk about?"

"She's picking me up at 7."

"That's great. How do you feel about this?"

"Terrible. I feel like I'm cheating on you."

"Not at all. It's not cheating if I'm asking you to do it."

I paused in front of the bed to look at her in that way that communicated pure skepticism.

Eleanor chided me. "Don't look at me that way. I want you to do this. Think about it as me being selfish. I want to have the pleasure of seeing the two of you together while I'm still here."

"Well, I don't see it that way but I want to trust my instincts that you do know best."

"Thank you." She smiled that smile that made my heart warm.

As I strolled into our closet I tried to lighten the conversation. "I haven't been out on a date in years. What should I wear?"

Eleanor didn't hesitate. "I'd wear that tweed jacket and the cream colored silk blouse I bought you for your birthday. Pair it with a pencil skirt and your black pumps. You'll look stunning."

I put on the outfit and looked in the mirror. Dressy and sexy. The jacket was nicely fitted and the jacket and skirt accentuated my curves. The blouse was thin enough to give a hint of my bra and was open enough to see a substantial portion of my cleavage. I'd always had toned legs, and the pumps set off my calves. Eleanor knew that I'd look seductive in this outfit.

As I was putting on my make-up my anxiety level increased. I was going out with Kasey. I'd known her for over five years. We had gotten together with her at least fifty times and she was in our wedding. Why was I nervous? Was this a real date? Kasey made it appear as if she was going along just to make Eleanor happy.

Seven rolled around quickly and Kasey knocked on the door on time. I opened the door to see a vision of loveliness. Kasey had put her long red wavy hair up and was wearing a low cut turquoise dress that complimented her blue eyes, accented with a diamond pendant. She had high heels on as well, shaping her calves and accentuating her elegant long lines. She looked as if she had stepped out of the cover of Vogue.

"Wow," I said with true admiration. "Are we going out on a date or a seduction?"

Kasey tossed her head back and laughed. "Well, in for a penny, in for a pound. If we're going out on a date I thought I'd dress the part. And by the way, you don't look too shabby yourself," she added as she eyed me up and down.

It was my turn to laugh. "Eleanor picked out my outfit. She knows what looks good on me."

"She knows everything," Kasey quipped. "Does she know for sure that we're going to get together as a couple?"

"I wouldn't put it past her. She always seems to be two steps ahead of me," I said with a sigh.

"Well, let's get going. I've made a dinner reservation for 7:15 and I've picked out a movie that starts at 9:00."

Kasey picked out a new Italian restaurant that opened a few weeks ago. It was bustling and there was a charged atmosphere, as many locals were there trying it out for the first time. It was our first time there as well. The seasonal menu looked fantastic. I picked out a butternut squash ravioli and Kasey chose a pappardelle pasta with a rabbit ragu. We topped it off with a bottle of Brunello di Montalcino. I must admit I had a fantastic time. With Eleanor's illness, social occasions were few and far between, and I couldn't remember the last time I went out with her. Kasey looked lovely and it was refreshing to have an adult conversation in an elegant setting. It did occur to me that Eleanor would not be with me in the not too distant future. But this was still too strange. I was happy to have my time alone with Kasey and not be in a hospital or clinic or in an extended conversation with a caregiver about Eleanor's meds. But Eleanor was still with me and still a critical part of my life.

We went to a movie that unfortunately wasn't memorable in any respect. It was nice sitting next to Kasey, sharing buttered popcorn and a soda, and enjoying the admiring looks Kasey attracted in the lobby on the way out.

I got home at 11:30, usually long past Eleanor's bedtime. Kasey dropped me off. There was only a moment of awkwardness as she gave me a hug good night. I wanted to kiss her, but thought better of it. To my surprise Eleanor was sitting up in bed, reading a book.

"So how was the date?"

"It was fine. I wouldn't really call it a date. It was more like a girl's night out."

"Call it what you want. It was a good first step."

"Eleanor, I want to do this for you but it doesn't feel comfortable to me."

"I know, but trust me on this."

I changed into my nightgown and snuggled with her. She wrapped her arms around me and exhibited unusual strength.

"Have you been working out?" I asked, half joking.

Eleanor laughed. "No, but I'm so glad that you're getting out. I can't tell you how happy this makes me feel."

I noticed the resurgence in her energy as well. Perhaps the chemo and radiation was working?

"When will you be going out on another date with Kasey?"

"Hopefully never. You're not going to leave me."

"Are we going down that path again? Have you been listening to me?"

I kissed her full on the lips. She surrendered, parting her lips and accepting my tongue. It was a passionate moment that erased much of the pain and hurt over the last few months.

"That's my answer Eleanor. I choose you."

I was torn over whether to ask Kasey out again. I wanted to please Eleanor and of course I loved Kasey's company but going out with Kasey was my admission that Eleanor would soon not be with me.

Kasey came over the next evening to drop off some pasta sauce she had made. Lovely as always, she seemed to have a little extra sparkle in her eyes.

"Hi ya Kasey," I chirped.

"Hey yourself," said the comely redhead. "I've been thinking about you."

My goodness. That was about as forward as Kasey had even been with me. I decided to play it cool. "Really? What about?"

"I do want you. I think you've known that. Really, ever since our first meeting. Before you were married."

She didn't need to remind me but it hit home to hear her say it out loud. Those many years ago when we got together for that one night those feelings of passion were beyond the excitement of new love. I did want her, and if I wasn't with Eleanor I could have seen myself hooking up with Kasey. Kasey even brought out my latent submissive streak. Her skills as a Domme resulted in one of the most powerful sexual experiences of my life. Eleanor was right about that.

Snapping back to the present, I confronted Kasey about her spontaneous confession of love. "You talked to Eleanor."

"Yes."

"She told you to talk to me," I said as I continued my inquisition. I was trying to decide if I should be mad at Eleanor.

"Yes, but not in any specifics. I've told you things that I'm sure Eleanor suspects but doesn't know for sure."

"Kasey ... I'm flattered. As long as we're baring our souls, you know I wanted you once and that want has never gone away."

We looked at each other -- really looked at each other. It was that teary-eyed tilted head, breaking smile look. "Shit ... I'm falling in love. Shit ... I'm falling in love. Damn Eleanor!" I thought.

Kasey charged at me, slamming me hard against the wall. She pressed her long lean body against mine, us each feeling for the friction points between our bodies. Her breath was hot, as she panted against my neck.

I started to cry. But I took her face in my hands and kissed her -- hard -- pressing my lips tightly against hers with my tears washing over our lips. I hadn't had sex in months and my need was overwhelming. My desire for Kasey came welling to the surface as I gazed upon her face -- the cute upturned nose, the high cheekbones and the infectious smile. I wanted her. Eleanor tried to assuage my guilt with her many lectures to me. I decided to surrender to my desires.

I leaned over to whisper in her ear. "I want you too, and I want you now."

Kasey didn't need to be asked twice. She tugged on my hand and led me to her car. Once we were both settled in the front seat we looked at each other and in an instant we were on each other again, kissing, with our hands fondling one another. I slipped my hand inside her bra, cupping her ample breast. The temperature was rising in the car and before too long the windows were fogged up. I started to unbutton her blouse when she wrenched her body away.

"We need to get to my house. Otherwise the neighbors are going to call the cops."

We both straightened up a bit and Kasey made the twenty minute drive to her house. We held hands most of the way there, riding in silence, our fingers teasing one another as she drove.

The scene at Kasey's apartment looked like a set of a movie. Our clothes littered the floor on the way to Kasey's bedroom, her stockings flung over the back of a dining room chair. Kasey threw me on the bed. Her instincts as a Domme were not yet suppressed. It was too long for me, not having consummated my relationship with her, so I succumbed to her, allowing her to straddle my face, pulling her panties to the side, and allowing me to see her flaming red pubic patch awash in her own juices. Her musky scent only emboldened me further as I pressed my lips against her nether lips, sucking the sweet juice off of her, relishing the texture and taste. She threw her head back, issuing a guttural groan, using one hand to massage her clit.