Explorations 1.0

It was surreal. We shared what our thoughts and feelings were when we had been in particularly awkward situations. We told each other our fears and insecurities. It felt so good to lay my most personal self out before her, and be accepted as who I am. And to have her do the same, well, it was by far the most amazing experience of my life so far.

We had wondered down miles of ever smaller dirt roads, until the two dirt tracks on a grassy path ended in a clearing, marking the farthest someone could go in a car. There were a couple of footpaths that led away from here, and I had to search a bit through the overgrown brush to find the one I wanted. At one time the path was a logging road, but all traces of that were long gone. Back in the twenties, or even before, this whole area had been clear cut. Most of the existing forest had grown up naturally from that, but there were some places that had been replanted, then forgotten about.

The path led us up a hillside, thick with huge Oaks, and Elms, and Maples, leaves ablaze in oranges, reds, and yellows, in dazzling and vivid variety. When we neared the top of the hill, we looked at each other and smiled. The place up ahead was our favorite place in all of the woods around the cabin. We weren't ever officially allowed to go this far on our own, which had made it all the more special.

Cresting the hill, the forest changed. Gone were the leafy hardwoods, in their place were endless evenly spaced rows of towering Red Pines. For as far as we could see in every direction, arrow-straight trunks rose to the sky. Far above, their branches intertwined, lush needles blocking any but the barest glimpse of the sky. Even though we were grown up, this place still had that awe-inspiring sense of hugeness. Our talking stopped as we were struck with a sense of reverence for this magical place. In silence, we walked down the row for a while, then cut across the rows towards a patch of sunlight in the distance.

It was a clear space where a storm, long before our time, had blown down some trees, which had then been scavenged for firewood. I was pleased to see that it wasn't overgrown with trees, but had remained a perfect little grassy meadow, nestled inside a living cathedral. We walked out into the middle, and looked around.

Melissa spoke softly. "Nothing from my childhood is ever as good as I remember it, but this.." She trailed off.

"Is better." I added, watching her closely.

"So much better." She agreed, turning in a circle to take it all in. She stopped, facing me.

"Are you hungry?" I asked.

She gave me that funny little smile, and when her blue eyes met my green ones, it finally clicked. The whole time since our reunion, every time she looked at me, the same emotion, the same desire, was there to see in her eyes, clear as day. When she responded with "I'm starving.", I knew she didn't just mean that she was hungry for the sandwiches she had in her backpack.

But, then again, we had just walked almost ten miles through the woods. So, when she started digging out the aforementioned sandwiches, I wasn't completely disappointed.

Chapter Four.

I spread out the blanket I had packed, and we sat cross legged facing each other, close enough for our knees to be touching. We talked as we ate, and laughed at the occasional burp, or dribble of jelly from our peanut butter sandwiches, that were gone in short order.

We had talked about some pretty personal things today, but what she asked next kinda caught me off guard.

"How often do guys jerk off?"

Without trepidation I replied. "I jerk off at least once a day, usually before bed. I think I'm pretty normal as guys go, so... yeah."

"So, do you just- Could you do it more if you wanted to?" She asked, looking genuinely curious.

"Yeah, I guess. There's usually tons of times during the day that I could do it if I had the time and the privacy."

"Could you do it any time you want, like, do you need to get in the mood?"

I laughed. "Guys don't need much to get in the mood. Like really, it doesn't take much at all to get me hard, and then I'm ready to go if I wanted to. It's actually pretty annoying. What about you, girls I mean?"

"Oh, I'm horny ALL the time. For the longest time, I thought I was some kind of sexual pervert, until one of my girlfriends said she was the same way."

Subconsciously conjuring a few mental images, and out of my own curiosity, I asked. "How often do you...?"

"Every morning. Every night. Usually once during the day." She stated matter-of-factually.

"Wow." I said, then after a slightly awkward pause. "Are you right now?"

"All. The. Time." She said, staring into my eyes. "Especially right now."

"Me too" I said softly.

She glanced quickly down to the bulge in my pants, then returned her eyes to mine. "I noticed." Her voice was almost a whisper. She leaned in a little closer to me. "Have you, since you got here yesterday?"

"I did on the way up, to avoid any, you know, embarrassment that might pop up, but not since. You?"

She shook her head in the negative, and moved closer. Her face was right in front of mine. I studied the intricate detail of her irises, and by the way they moved, I could tell she was studying mine. Our lips were so close to touching, I could feel the heat of her quick and shallow breath on my face.

I summoned the courage to make the actual first move. She made a tiny inaudible gasp as my hand brushed the underside of her jawline, and slid along her neck under her ear. I let my fingers sift their way into her silky hair, and gently cupped the back of her head.

As I pulled her towards me, her lips parted to meet mine. My tongue found hers, and we both made a humming moan of pleasure as we began kissing. Slowly at first, tentative and gentle, but soon becoming more urgent and intense.

We were like two starving people set before a lavish buffet. After the first few bites, the body remembers what it needs most, and ravenous hunger takes control.

After what seemed like forever, and no time at all, we parted, breathing heavy and licking saliva off of slightly numb lips. The look in her eyes was subtly different now. The need was still there, without a doubt, but now I could see so much more. A tiny change in the way she was looking at me, or perhaps just a change of how I was seeing her, and it was as if her eyes were screaming "I love you!". I hoped she could see my love for her in my eyes.

She moved back in quickly, and our kissing resumed. This time it remained slow and passionate, and was all the sweeter for it. Our hands began roving over each other's body, from neck to back, to hips, to chest, and every curve and line between. I cupped her firm breasts and gave them slight squeeze, making her moan into my mouth.

She caressed my cheeks with her palms, then slowly trailed her hands down, down, down, until she found my belt. She fumbled around a little, trying to get it unbuckled, so I reached down and helped. That done, she wasted no time in undoing the top button of my button fly jeans. With the first one free, she pulled to the sides, and the rest popped open in a string.

We had stopped kissing, as what was going on required a little bit more concentration than we would have been able to give. I shifted a little to make it easier for her to tug on my underwear, and send a hand down inside. I gasped as she closed her hand around my VERY erect cock, and pulled it up into the open.

Realizing I was behind in the undoing-of-pants race, I went for hers only to find them already open. Sneaky girl. She must have done her own before mine.

I slid a hand inside her pale blue panties, and was surprised to find that she had shaved her pubic hair. Not that it's anything strange or unusual, I just wasn't expecting it. I liked it. I went farther down, and when my fingers slid down along her labia, she shuddered.

Breathing hard now, she pressed her cheek against mine, then started sliding her hand up and down my shaft. She was doing it very differently than I do it, naturally, and I had been a little anxious that she wouldn't know how to do it right. Well, she didn't. But that didn't matter, because it still felt amazing.

I slid my middle finger into the wet hotness between her pussy lips, moving it slowly through and back. I varied the motion a little bit here and there, being mindful of how her body responded. When I would do something, and she would gasp in pleasure, I did more of that.

Remembering something I read in a magazine, yes I read the articles too, I moved my hand a little farther down and found the opening to her hole with my middle finger. I slowly pushed it inside of her. She moaned loudly, and rested her head on my shoulder. I moved my free hand to the back of her head, holding her against me. She had stopped stroking me, but I didn't care. I wanted to make her cum. I needed to make her cum.

I began moving my finger in and out of her, massaging the inside of her with a "come here" motion, just like the article said to do. She was moaning with every breath now, and she started rocking her hips in time with my finger. Her moans got louder and louder, every breath quicker than the last. I moved my finger a little quicker, with a little more pressure. Finally, she took one last deep breath and held it in. Her whole body was quivering, and I could feel her pussy spasm tightly around my finger.

She let out her breath as a long sigh. She raised her head and looked at me with complete satisfaction. Cupping my face with her hands, she kissed me. Remembering that she had neglected my needs, she pulled back a little and started to say "I'm sorry", but I stopped her with a finger to her lips. I kissed her, and as I did, I felt both of her hands wrap around my cock.

She must have read an article or two herself, because what she did felt wonderful. She moved her hands in unison, up and down, gripping firmly, but not too hard. She added a slight twist to the hand that went over the head of my cock, and it was my turn to start moaning.

She looked down to watch what she was doing to me, and I kissed her forehead, before beginning to pant into her hair. My hand was still down her pants, finger still inside her, so I went back to work. I felt her body respond to my renewed attentions, quickly reattaining that urgent build to climax.

She kept stroking me, and I could feel my own orgasm build. This wasn't a quick jerk and spurt, like I'm usually satisfied with. No, this was different. This orgasm was building like an avalanche, powerful and unstoppable.

I was distantly aware that I was still fingering her, and as I got ever closer to climax, I could tell that she was too. Release was immanent, and I managed to gasp "I'm going to cum".

The avalanche roared through me, and I shuddered as I felt spurt after spurt of cum shoot through my cock. Melissa was shaking too, having cum again from my ministrations.

Neither of us moved a muscle for at least a minute, until we had both caught our breath. She looked up at me, and we stared into each other's eyes. No words were necessary. The bond between us was undeniable, unbreakable. Hearts, minds and souls, as one.

As perfect as the moment was, I'll admit sitting like I was for so long was getting uncomfortable. She made a tiny disappointed sound when I removed my hand from her pants. We both looked down. She had caught all my sperm in her hand, and my hand was soaking wet with her juices. We both started laughing. Then, like it was the most ordinary thing to do, she raised her hand to her mouth and slurped up the cum, licking her palm clean. I, in turn, licked my own hand clean.

"I like how you taste." She said softly.

"You taste wonderful." I replied. And she did. It wasn't like anything I'd ever tasted before, almost... sweet. Most of all, it was the taste of her, which by that fact alone, made it great.

We got out of our seated positions, and laid down across the blanket, facing each other. I intertwined the fingers of one hand with one of hers, and rested my other on her hip.

I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew, the sunbeams were gone from our magical little clearing. I checked my watch and discovered that I had been asleep for at least an hour and a half. It was nearly three in the afternoon.

Melissa was awake, and watching my every move. She gave me a brief kiss. "You're adorable when you're sleeping."

"You didn't sleep?"

She shook her head. "Watching you was way better than sleep."

Even after all we had shared, I found myself blushing.

She giggled. "You're adorable when you're awake too."

Her giggle was contagious, I couldn't help but join her. I kissed her, and said. "We should really get going."

She nodded in agreement, and her smile faded ever so slightly, which nearly broke my heart.

Chapter Five.

On the hike back to the cabin, there was significantly less talking. For the most part we were both perfectly content to hold hands and enjoy the colorful autumn scenery.

Every once in a while one of us would ask something like "Favorite color?", and we would both give our answer. Her favorite color is blue, mine is red. While there were some differences in the things we liked, we found that we had much more in common, just like how we were years ago. For example, we both loved cheesy science fiction movies, and thought that the soundtrack to "Conan The Barbarian" was just about the best soundtrack to a movie ever. Our favorite food was pepperoni pizza, and our favorite fast food was Taco Bell. I could go on and on, but suffice to say, I had more in common with Melissa than I did with any of my guy friends.

It was nearly dark, and we were about a half mile from the cabin, and just passing by a long abandoned old shack, when I had an idea. I stopped walking. A few steps up the road she stopped and faced me, confused. I stepped forward, grabbed her hand, and led her around to the back of the shack. Once safely out of sight from the road, I pulled her close and kissed her passionately. She melted into my arms.

When we broke the kiss to catch our breath, I whispered. "Turn around, and lean back into me." Which she did without question.

I brushed her hair aside, and started kissing her neck, soliciting a sigh of pleasure. While I did that, I cupped her breasts, squeezing them gently. I could feel her nipples through her clothes, and I gave them the gentlest of pinches, which she seemed to really like. My hands moved down her flat belly, and I managed to get her pants undone very quickly. I trailed my fingertips along the lines between her hips and her groin, and I could feel her push her hips forward, desperate for my hand to reach it's destination. My fingers teased her between her pussy lips in the ways that had got the best reaction before, and I was not disappointed.

With great concentration, I used two of my fingers to spread her lips apart slightly, then slowly sank my middle finder into her as deeply as I could. I started doing the thing that had made her cum twice already today, and she groaned in ecstasy. As her pleasure build towards release, I pushed a second finger inside of her. Her knees went weak, and I found that between the arm around her chest holding her to me, and the hand with two fingers deep inside her, I was holding up most of her weight.

In her labored breathing, she quietly gasped the word "yes".

I moved my fingers in the same "come here" motion I did with just the one, being ultra-attentive to her reactions. Tiny variations in my movements yielded big results, and she came quickly, body tensing and quivering all over. As she fought to get her ragged breathing under control, she managed to whisper. "Oh my god you are good at that!"

I whispered back. "I'm glad."

I was glad, and damn if I wasn't proud of myself. I was not only able to make her cum, but apparently I'm able to make her do it in spectacular fashion. I made a quiet vow to myself, that I would study even the tiniest of ways her body reacted, so every time we were together like this, it would be better for her.

When she could stand on her own, she turned and wrapped her arms around me in a hug, resting her head on my shoulder. She held me tightly, and didn't move. I could tell that something was different, something was... wrong.

Instantly worried that I had done something to upset her, I asked as gently as I could. "What is it?"

She pulled her face up and looked at me. There were tears in her eyes. He voice was sorrowful. "I don't deserve you."

I wanted to say something like "Of course you do." but she cut me off before I could respond.

"No, I don't deserve you. You're just so kind, and wonderful, and amazing, and the way you look at me makes my heart melt." Tears rolled down her perfect cheeks, and her voice became anguished. "And I CAN'T have you. No one would ever accept this."

She did have a point. A point I had swept into a corner of my mind, and hidden under a rug. We were second cousins. Technically, it's perfectly legal for us to be together, and as societal taboos went, it was actually pretty low on the list. But our friends and family would absolutely, one hundred percent, not be okay with it. I didn't know what to say, so I stayed quiet.

"I ran away from my family. Some of them are just shitty people, and I couldn't care less what they thought about me." She was almost sobbing now. "But I love your family. You mom is just the best, and your brothers and sisters, everybody... I couldn't live with what they would think of me, and I couldn't live with what they would think about you."

The look of pleading in her eyes made my heart break, and I began to cry. I didn't have an answer. We had found something so special, so perfect. We got just taste of what we could be together. To face the fact that this wonderful thing had to end, that it couldn't blossom into what we both dreamed it could be, was devastating.

I rubbed her back as she cried into my shoulder. "Growing up, every time my parents would bring me up here, I would ask, is Melissa going to be there? When they'd say no, I was always so disappointed. Seeing you up here was something that I always looked forward to."

Her crying began to slow as she listened to me talk.

"All of my best memories were made here, with you. When it was time to go home, I was always sad, but I had to go home. I had school and friends, a whole different life. When I'd ask my parents if you were going to be here, and they said yes, that was always the happiest I'd been since we last said goodbye."

She looked at me, the crying having nearly stopped. "So, we live two lives? I don't know if we can do that."

"If it's the choice between that, and nothing at all..."

She nodded her head slowly. "People will find out, eventually."

"We'll just have to be careful." I cupped her face in my hands. "Living without you now, is not an option."

It really wasn't an option. Not after the last, what, thirty hours? Did I really fall so madly in love with this person in only a day and a half? No, of course not. This was a love that had taken a lifetime to build. We reunited after three years apart, and were now mature enough to realize what could be, and we reached for it. Now that we had both grasped it, neither of us could ever let go.

We stayed behind the shed for a while, to regain our composure. It was almost fully dark out now, and starting to get chilly, so I gave Melissa one of the hoodies I had packed. She put it on gratefully, and it warmed my heart to see her smile back on her face.

As we turned down the cabin's driveway, she leaned over to me and said. "Our situation is very Shakespearean. Star crossed lovers and all that."

I chuckled. "Just hopefully without, you know, the poison and all the murder."