Father Ted's Diary Ch. 02

All story characters engaged in sexual activities are eighteen years of age or older.

The next few days were busy, Jo was doing a lot, she was sending me pictures of beds and colour schemes and through Sister Karen, Peter had agreed that Saturday would be his last day and he'd leave after the farewell party.

Peter phoned me back on the Tuesday evening and suggested a meeting at eleven and lunch at twelve on Friday where he'd introduce me to the nuns that I'd be working with and after lunch, a cheese and wine party in the church hall to introduce me to a selected group of parishioners who took an active interest in the church. He also offered a bed if I'd like to stay the night. He also suggested having another chat where he could explain certain things that could improve the running of the church, his voice sounded slurred, I suggested tomorrow evening after dinner, I would call him; Peter accepted this; he gave me his mobile number and seven o'clock would be good for him.

Mum was at her yoga when I phoned Peter, I phoned him from my mobile so I could record the conversation, at the end of the call I was glad I did this as he gave me so much information.

I phoned him just after seven, he answered on the second ring, his voice was slurred again, it was obvious he had been drinking, his opening words were, "Hi Ted, you're a lucky priest, this parish has a lot of hungry pussy. The nuns are also hungry for cock, I don't know about Mother Almighty as she was looking after the Bishop, I had nothing with her or the young novice Maria, she's ripe now though, she has massive tits, all the nuns have big tits, Maria's next step is getting her some nice lingerie. One of our parishioners is called Lucy, Lucy's husband is not looking after her, Lucy takes it in every hole, she's got a boutique in the town, all the nuns love nice lingerie but they can't be seen in her boutique so Lucy brings it to me and I give it to the nuns."

"With Maria when you get here, casually brush you hand against one of her massive milkers, do it once and any time you're the same room as her, she won't be far from you, gradually built up how you feel her tits then suggest she needs some new lingerie, take her to Lucy's website and Maria will wet herself when she sees the Boudoir Lingerie. I'm also hearing that Mother Almighty is spending a lot of time with Maria, that's normal for a Mother Superior. You'll be here on Friday, I know Lucy will be here on Friday, I'll introduce you to her."

I asked, "Are all the nuns bisexual?"

"Yes, they're all into it, apart from Mother Almighty, they all visit me to watch porn, there's a computer in the office, but only Mother Almighty and I have private computers. All the nuns apart from Sister Ruth and Maria are on the pill but Sister Karen has come off it a few years ago as she's now sixty, if I was still here in a month's time Maria would be on the pill as I'd be fucking her every day. Alice, the pharmacist is a member of the church, an older husband and hungry for cock, she's helped me when I've caught a nasty thing the same with Dr. Kay, she gives a great ride but they all do, they're all desperate for cock. This town is full of wealthy men with younger trophy wives, there are few young men around here, most of the town people are all retired and there's no industry around the town, so not many young people come here."

"Peter, a question, I'm meeting Mother Joan on Friday when I visit, how should l treat her?"

"Ted, I don't get on with her but I'm sure she'd be a great fuck, be nice to her, tell her you're happy to work with her. I've never heard her confession, the bishop did that, when nuns come to confession, you can hear many imagined sins, 'I took too much sugar in my tea.' But if they're having lustful, immoral thoughts then you know that they're wanting fucked, we have four confessional boxes in the church, we only use one now and it's hardly used, I was thinking of making confessions by appointment only or booking them online as I sit there for so long doing nothing. The nuns have sucked me off hundreds of times in my box, I've had sex sitting on my chair with them sitting on top of me."

"When Mother Almighty takes communion from me, since we fell out she's never taken the host in the mouth from me, when I say Body of Christ she takes it in her fingers and puts it in her mouth herself, I'd love to put my cock into her mouth. We had another priest giving a sermon here, she took the host in the mouth from him."

"Have you ever heard of the middle finger trick at communion?"

I said no, he laughed and said, "This works, you've a sexy woman or nun you'd like to have sex with, you're holding the host between your thumb and index finger, if you want to get their attention put your middle fingertip on top of your index fingernail, say Body of Christ, they put their tongue out to receive the host and as they take the host put your middle fingertip on their tongue and slowly draw it across their tongue. If you've fucked them before they know now you want to fuck them again, if you haven't fucked them they now know you're interested in them, every woman I've done this to I've fucked, try it as the results will surprise you."

It astounded me with what he said; I thanked him and told him I was looking forward to meeting him on Friday.

I was now looking forward to my meeting on Friday and taking up my new position the following weekend. I got a message from Jo asking me if I'd like to cam as she had a lot to tell me; she told me she was wearing a nice negligee; I checked my watch, mum wouldn't be back for at least another half hour.

I cam'd her and she answered immediately, the negligee was see-through, her body was incredible, she said, "Ted, you're going to have a wonderful bathroom in your apartment, it has everything in it, power shower, double bath and a Jacuzzi with high pressure pumps and it'll be completed by next Thursday, I'm sure you'll love it. I got Sister Karen to work her magic, Peter will leave on Saturday after his farewell party, all is going well and since you're coming on Friday, would you like to spend Friday night with me?"

"If we can do it, why not?"

"The church has a little cottage down here, I'll let you know tomorrow if it's possible, do you like my negligee?"

"Push those big beauties out for me and swing them."

She did, and it looked amazing, she said, "Ted, would you like to watch me suck my hard nipples?"

First, she brought her left nipple to her mouth, sucking and licking it, then did the same with her right nipple."

I said, "Jo, when I'm the priest, will you come to me for confession?"

She laughed and said, "I'd confess every day, I have lustful thoughts and when I think of you my hungry cunt gets so fucking wet, Ted, I'm missing you. I wish we'd done it on Monday."

"Jo, we'll do it soon, will you come to communion with me and will you take the host in your mouth?"

"I wish I was taking your cock in my mouth right now, and when you give me the host, I want your middle finger, then I'll move my tongue from left to right in my mouth."

"Why would you do that, Jo?"

"To tell you I want fucked in my cunt and my ass, do you want me to do a little peep show for you?"

"What kind of peep show?"

"You've watched me suck my hard nipples, now you can watch me fist my hungry cunt, I'm so wet but don't get the wrong idea, my cunt will give you the tightest fuck of your life, Ted we can do so much."

"Jo, we will do all these things together, mums at her yoga and I have to pick her up. One other thing, is it possible that mum can have a bedroom with a connecting door next to my bedroom as she'll want to visit me?"

"I think that's possible but I'll let you know tomorrow, Peter's mother used to visit him, she slept in the room next to him, I'll ask tomorrow if we can put a door in, I'll let you go, I need to see you soon."

Mum arrived home five minutes later, I updated her on the farewell party on the Saturday and my saying my first mass on the Sunday. I wanted her there, I said, "Babs, when I'm giving you, the host how would you like me to give it to you?"

Mum laughed and said, "I want the middle finger and slowly brush your fingertip over my tongue as that makes my hungry cunt tingle, then I'll move my tongue from left to right but on Sunday, we'll postpone you double fucking me until later as you're going to be busy after mass. I now knew a lot about giving the middle finger. In bed that night I said, "Babs, how many priests have given you the middle finger?"

Mum kissed me so lovingly and said, "A lot but I only perform for John, he can't get it up now so I'll only perform for you, next Sunday will be a big day for you, I think John wants to attend too. I don't do all-nighters with him but he likes to watch me fist myself and make myself cum while talking dirty to him, Ted when John retires, I'll stop doing it with him, but I want him to put you on at least another five committees, I want him to make you financially secure."

"I love you Babs, I want to watch you fist yourself before I fuck you tonight."

"I'll do that for you, another thing Ted, you're going to find yourself very popular with a lot of women, this will be a time for you to create a lot of new friendships. You give the best oral I've ever had, your monster cock gives so much pleasure in the mouth, cunt and ass, you give a woman three vaginal orgasms when you ass fuck her, you're a natural talent in bed. Ted, I'll never be jealous and I want you to do it as I know that when we do it, you're making love to me and you'll always be there for me."

The next afternoon I got a message from Jo, "Great news Ted, the connecting door will be done by Friday of next week, we are lucky in the town as we have so many family businesses that roll on from one generation to the next, Liz who runs the business now has done her bit and produced four sons who all work in the business. Bill, her husband is sixteen years older than her, she is another trophy wife but she's a worker. I asked her to help me with this work and she's going to get it done, I think you will love your new bedroom."

"I have a lovely cottage we can use tomorrow afternoon, we'll be safe there, I'll message you the address and we can meet there at three. Peter asked if he could speak with me this morning, he said he knew we have had our differences, but with the new priest coming on Friday he thought it better if he introduced him to me and I was at the same table when we have lunch. I agreed to this but I wouldn't be there in the afternoon, I knew I could use the cottage so everything works out well. One other thing is the farewell party will start at twelve, there will be a buffet lunch with wine and drinks, he'll make a short speech and will leave with his brother at two thirty, Ted he usually heard the nun's confession on a Saturday at six, will you do it or will we leave it for a week? Thinking about you, Jo x."

Jo sent the address, I told her I'd tell her about the confessions on Friday after my visit. I arrived at the church at ten to eleven, there was a building next to the church which I took to be the Priest's house, I rang the doorbell and the door was opened by a tall young nun in a white habit, the first thing that struck you was the size of her massive breasts, they were big, big, BIG. Then, her honest eyes and beautiful smile of this charming young nun, she asked, "Are you Father Ted?"

I said, "I am."

And offered her my hand, she took it and shook it firmly and said, "I'm Sister Maria, I'm the novice nun here, I've to take you to Father Peter's office, I've also to ask what do you prefer tea or coffee?"

"Sister Maria, I'd love a milk coffee if that's possible?"

"We have a coffee machine and I can make you a cappuccino?"

"Yes please, that would be lovely."

Maria knocked on the door and Peter's voice said come in, he stood up from his desk, he extended his hand and said, "Ted, I'm Peter, I'm pleased to meet you, please take a seat."

Maria said, "Father Peter, I'm making Father Ted a cappuccino, would you like a top up?"

"I topped myself up, thanks for asking."

He then told me he said mass every morning for the nuns and the congregation, only one mass on Sunday at eleven. He said that he was trying to find a way that the confessions could be booked online, as so often he was wasting hours sitting doing nothing in the confessional box. I was taking notes of everything he said, there was a programme for the online confessions and I tell him all about it.

There was a knock at the door, Peter said, come in and Maria put the cup and sugar bowl beside me, I didn't do it intentionally but my arm brushed against Maria's massive right breast; she didn't pull away; I had the impression she was pushing her breast against my arm. I said, "Thank you Sister Maria, that's so kind of you."

She smiled a gorgeous smile and pushed her massive meaty breasts out for me. Maria said, "Father Peter, if you need anything, just buzz me, and lunch will be served at twelve."

Peter thanked her and when the door closed, he said, "Do you like Maria's big tits, she's ripe for it, she's developing into a beautiful, voluptuous woman, my brother's coming tonight and spending the final week with me, so I'll not be able to slip her into my bedroom, I had a great feel of her tits this morning, her nipples are huge and she loves them being squeezed, she'll be a candidate for nipple clamps. Mother Almighty is now teaching her about chastity, I wouldn't be surprised if she breaks her hymen. She's out to impress you, she's wearing a new bra this morning which pushes her tits out unbelievably, if you get the opportunity I'd do it with her, of the present nuns Mother Almighty and Maria are the only ones I haven't fucked. I was still fucking Ruth two years ago, she's so hot but she's got throat cancer and unfortunately has little time left, Sisters Karen and Ann are making soup for her every day as she can only take liquids. After lunch I'll introduce you to her as she knows I'm leaving. I bet you, Karen and Ann will be in the confessional box quickly, both give a great ride in every hole."

We spent the rest of the hour talking about the day to day running of the church, Peter admitted to me that his biggest mistake was not getting on with Jo.

Peter led me into the dining room where there was a table with a few bottles of white wine on it, Maria offered Peter and myself a glass, I looked at Jo, her massive breasts were being well pushed out, I took it the other two nuns were Karen and Ann, both were voluptuous and very fuckable. Peter then introduced me to Jo, Karen and Ann then Peter said, "Father Ted, I've enjoyed chatting with you and my impression of you is that you will do an excellent job here and we all wish you the very best."

He raised his glass and said, "Father Ted."

They all said it, then we started chatting as a group, Jo asked, "When will you start, Father Ted?"

"Mother Joan, I will come next Saturday to Father Peter's farewell party and when he leaves, I'll be your new parish priest. One thing I'd like to do today, I'll give a card with my email address and my mobile number, you can call me or message me on WhatsApp."

I gave them all a card, Peter didn't want one as he had my number on his phone. We then sat down, Jo was sitting beside me, Peter opposite while Karen, Ann and Maria went into the kitchen, I had the feeling that Peter was a little drunk as his speech was getting a little slurred. He must have realised this himself, as Jo topped up her glass and mine, but Peter didn't want any. Jo made sure her massive left breast brushed my arm firmly.

Karen, Ann and Maria came back carrying our plated meals, we were having steak and kidney pie, it was delicious, I said, "I have the feeling that I'm going to eat well here, this is delicious, who produced this heavenly steak and kidney pie?"

Karen replied, "Thank you Father Ted, it was a joint effort between Sister Ann and myself, we both enjoy cooking and you'll never go hungry, do you enjoy a full English breakfast as Father Peter will confirm we prepare an excellent one?"

Peter said, "They certainly do, I can honestly say that the food I've had here has been thoroughly enjoyable."

As we were finishing our lunch, Maria topped up our glasses, she brushed her massive left breast against my arm; she smiled at me when she sat down.

Peter invited Mother Joan to join him in introducing Father Ted to Sister Ruth so she could see they were all united.

I thanked Karen, Ann and Maria for the lovely lunch and I was looking forward to working with them, all three were flirting with their eyes and all three were holding my card.

Jo, Peter and myself went into Ruth's bedroom, she looked dreadful but still managed a warm smile, she said, "Are you Father Ted, I'm Sister Ruth and I'm so pleased to meet you, I wish you all the best in your time at St Thomas."

I shook her hand, which was weak, and said, "Thank you for your good wishes, I'll be here next weekend to look after you, how are you feeling?"

"Not good, everything I do is a struggle."

I didn't reply as a tall, good looking big busted woman came into the bedroom, Peter said, "Here's the woman that'll make you better Ruth, Father Ted may I introduce you to Dr Kay who will be your doctor when you start here."

Dr Kay put her elbow against mine and said, "Pleased to meet you, Father Ted, just give me a minute and we can have a chat, I have to give Ruth her injection, then she'll have a pleasant sleep after her lunch."

Kay gave Ruth the injection, her bedside manner with Ruth was amazing, Ruth was asleep two minutes later, we went into a lounge and I said, "Dr Kay, I once had a parishioner who had throat cancer, his family gave him Champagne to drink, his daughter told me he'd told her that the Champagne had brought enjoyment to his last days. Dr Kay, I'd like to provide Champagne for Sister Ruth. Is there any medical reason that I shouldn't do this?"

Dr Kay shook my hand and said, "None at all, what a kind gesture, I salute you for offering this and I'm looking forward to you taking up your new appointment."

I said, "Mother Joan, I wonder if you would indulge me, I will phone Whites the Wine Merchants, I've ordered two wine fridges, one for red, one for white, there will be a few cases of Champagne, could you ensure the Champagne is chilled to 5C, this is the best temperature to drink Champagne, her throat is now on fire this will cool it for her."

"Father Ted, what a kind gesture, I'm impressed, I've a very important meeting at three. It may be five-thirty or even six before I'm back."

"No problem, I'll get them to deliver at six, thank you so much for doing this and I hope she gets to drink a lot of bottles."

"Father Ted, if I've any problems with the fridge, I've got your number."

It was now two-thirty, Jo and Dr Kay left and I spoke to Peter, he said, "St Thomas is getting a good priest, you doing this will be around the town in hours, Kay was impressed with you, she's hot and her husband is so old he can't get it up, what parish did you grow up in?"

I said St John the Baptist. He said, "Was Fr Charles your priest?"

I said yes.

"That guy was fucking anything that moved, supposedly, he was so well endowed that women just wanted his cock, he's dead now I met him at a couple of seminars, he was a character, I'll see you next Saturday and I think Mother Almighty is hot for you."

I drove down the road, and spotted Jo's Polo parked outside a gorgeous-looking cottage, the numbers corresponded, I parked my car and rang the doorbell, the door opened fully but I didn't see Jo, then she said, "Don't be shy, come in and I hope you like what I'm wearing, I want to kiss you, that was the kindest thing I've ever seen in my life."