Fever 01

Fever 01

Hello there, I'm Fredderick because of some long-standing family name thing, but I grew up known as Freddy and that was better and more fitting and thanks to my understanding friends and class mates, I occasionally attended a fair amount of after school activities as more of a Freddie, so things weren't all that bad for me in the early stages.

And trust me, I never missed a chance to paint posters for the hallways as Freddie and trust me again when I say that I used that "paint smudges everywhere" excuse to my advantage. My paint smudges were well placed.

Oh, and by the long way around, over the rocks and under the bridge, I was involved in a sports program back then, which I'm admitting is a stretch, but take the old sidewalk to stream, hop over by balancing on the big rocks, swing under the walking bridge and you'll see that by hook or crook, I was involved in a sports program. Oh, and squint a little.

Anyways, school was actually fun for me, but that ended and people and their cliques drift off, right?

Well, I maintained a relationship with sports (tee he) on a part time basis to keep me busy, I developed a relationship with a program because my body was almost there anyways and my attitude was definitely there and that's when I changed my name to Fever because there were more than a few weekends in the beginning where the meds were making me weird, but working and I needed excuses to lay low, so I laid low with a Fever on a few occasions and quietly stuck with it.

Oh, no, I wasn't weird before the program, so.

[(Blink, blink) quizzical stare (blink, blink)]

No? Well, if you carefully review my life story by stepping over the big rocks and dipping under the bridge, well, never mind, all that's important that I had the best legs crossed posture to paint school spirit posters, so.

But my involvement in a sports program was real and is still real today, so.

[(Blink, blink) quizzical stare (blink, blink)]

No? Hah! We'll just see then! (Disclosure, it's just to keep busy, it's not full time, I have fun with it, nobody even knows and nobody will ever know.]

[Beep, beep! Honk, honk, let's go! Beep, beep, what's the hold up? Honk, honk, move it!]

"Alright, alright, people, the gates for Lot C will open up in just a couple of minutes just as soon as the commotion up at the entry gate is resolved, so just ignore my parking attendant flashlight, beep twice if you like how I belted my yellow safety vest and the Sports Arena wants everyone to know that they care about your concert entertainment experience, yada, yada, yada, blah, blah, blah, thank you."

Well, it was a concert that night, but it was still at the Sports Arena, so, my story is still legit.

[Beep, beep. Beep, beep. Beep, beep]

"Thank you, I appreciate all of you and please, since you're all stuck in a parking lot commotion traffic jam, beep three times if you think I could pull off wearing my safety vest as a mini skirt, go."

[Beep, beep, beep. Honk, honk, honk. Toot, toot, toot]

Like I said, I have fun when keeping myself busy and the odds of actually running into anyone that I knew were remotely small.

[Honk, honk]

"Hey, just what is the holdup then, huh?"

[Lot C parking attendant approaches customer's mini school bus SUV window and leans forward]

[Leans forward after propping up on tippy toes, that is]

"Oh. It's you."

"Oh, hey, are you that kid with the squeaky voice that used to run around under the bleachers and in the restrooms taking sports side bets for T-Rex, huh?"

"Well, well, I mean, yeah, I'm the one who worked the parlay slip side bets for T-Rex back in the day, but it was the only way for me to be involved in one of the sports programs, so. Um, hi Wayne [shifts head forward], hi, Wayne's friend [shifts head towards rear window], hi girls, Yvette, Brandi, um [slides head back to driver], um, hi, Wayne."

"Fred, right? Um, Freddy as I remember it, right?"

"Tee he, you remember me, Wayne, but I go by Fever these days and as you can see, ta, da, I'm still involved with sports, well, tonight is a concert, but it's still the Sports Arena, so?"

All I can say is that I picked a good day to add a belt to my parking lot safety vest. I mean, I never thought that I might actually come upon someone that I knew as I waved my parking Lot C flashlight back and forth, right?

"Oh, Fever, huh? Well, Fever, what's the commotion up ahead and, er, you look different, so?"

For the record, Wayne was the first person to call me Fever out loud and to my face because I lived the quiet life, but I liked it, like a lot and that's not weird.

But it may seem weird that I'm avoiding addressing the girls much. Not everyone was a fan back in the day, so.

"Oh, I'll take that as a compliment, Wayne, um, I've filled out in some places and filled down in some other places and I scrub the reflective stripes on my safety vest with a toothbrush, which is not to say that it's any more flattering on me, but, thanks. Oh, and the commotion up ahead is Henry the key master having a hard time opening the gate to the parking lot C, so, one or two minutes more and you'll be on your way to experience the music concert, okay?"

"Ahem, and I'm Ted, since you addressed everyone else by name, so?"

"Oh, hi Teddy, I'm Fever and I was one year behind Wayne in school and one day in the Men's restroom during a football game in my senior year when Wayne had already graduated and I was collecting..."

"Oops! No, no, we went to school together, Freddy, um, Fever, um, the end, I mean, oops, the end, so."

"Oh, gotcha Wayne, I mean, you were my hero that night, so I would never embarrass you, but listen, Teddy, once during a game, I was working the illegal side parlay bet slips for T-Rex in the Men's room under the bleachers and these two thugs from a different school tried to snatch my money, you know, my bosses illegal money and then Wayne popped out of one of the stalls because, tee he, Wayne was always shy about peeing in front of so many other people at a urinal, tee he, and then Wayne explained to the two thugs who my gambling boss was and then the two thugs took off their leather jackets and left them for me and then they took off quick and then I tried to show my appreciation to Wayne..."

"Oops, oops, fowl on the field, the end! The end, the book is closed, tee he! Oh, I see the gate fences starting to shake and move, so, tee he, time to roll, um, ooh, so, where should I park then, Fever, huh?"

"(Giggling from the rear seat girls)"

[Oh, Teddy wasn't buying into that! But the tall chain link fence gates were starting to shake]

"Oh, first of all, I reserve every right from here to hell to hear that story again, Fever and secondly of all, tee he, take a little time to remember any other details that you may have forgotten, so, think about that, tee he. Also, I really like Fever for you. It fits well, so, um, tee he and then what happened, Fever, I mean, tee he, what better way to pass the time while stuck in a parking lot commotion traffic jam, right?"

[It was Fever's booty that started to shake a little, not the entry gates, since he was perfectly leaning into the sedan's window]

[Beep, beep, hey there, hey, honk, honk, I need instructions, beep, beep, um, hi]

"Well, Teddy, it was all almost harmless and I'm just a total tease and Wayne was, em, well, I was the aggressor with my showing of appreciation, but only with a Mountain Lion leap and I only went after his lips, but it surprised us both and we fell backwards into the restroom stall, so, other than a couple of awkward hand and arm catch movements, it was all harmless and above board, well, except for maybe how Wayne momentarily caught me in mid Mountain Lion leap and even that was harmless because a human butt is pretty universal and they all basically happen to fit into a man's hands when that man is surprised by a Mountain Lion leap that ended in a very appreciative hero of the day major lip plant, so, anyways, where are your seats for the concert then, Wayne, hmm?"

"[Sweating slightly, but lips are quivering] oh, whew, finally, a change of subject, tee he, um, just below nose bleed and just above the quivering lower lip level, so, tee he, Fever, tell Ted again how it was all harmless and above board, tee he [whew, I'm turning the air up!]"

"(Giggling from the rear seat girls)"

"Oh, Teddy, it wasn't that we fell back into the stall for a second time in a somewhat of a romantic embrace, but I noticed that Wayne didn't pull his zipper back up after hearing the commotions that the thugs were making and I was still too young to help him pull it back up, but, tee he, I made him play a game of "zip up, zip down" like over and over again and we both "tee he" giggled and played..."

"Alright, Fever, that's enough of the good ole days talk, er, you talk now, Ted, sheesh!"

"Oh, and thirdly, I reserve every right possible to hear more about how you had to stand on the toilet seat to show your appreciation and all, Fever, I mean, I can clearly see the height difference, so, I mean, think about any other details that you forgot about, tee he, for a special story telling date that we are probably going to have at a later time, tee he."

"Teddy, I appreciate the flirting, I really, really do, but I promise you that I'm just a tease date. I mean, I have the body and I have the attitude and I kind of have the will, but I don't quite have the nerve and my proof positive is that when my Mountain Lion leap resulted in a direct lip plant on Wayne's lips as a show of my appreciation, I mean, I didn't even know that people used their tongues, so that didn't happen and even after Wayne bounced me by my butt from his hands grip while we were tucked away inside of the restroom stall, I mean, we still didn't swap mouth DNA and our second..."

"OMFG! We knew each in school, Fever! The end! The end!"

"(Giggling from the rear seat girls)"

"Well, I was getting around to how then the two thugs came back to the restroom and started crying about getting their leather jackets back, so?"

"Whew, oh, okay then, Fever, so, whew, is this as high as the A/C goes then, huh?"

"Yeah, whew, so, Fever, I mean, don't say too much because I'm still looking forward to a special story telling night with you soon, but, ahem, what did happen when the two thugs came inside of the restroom and caught, ahem, Wayne bouncing you up and down with your butt, go ahead, tee he?"

"Oh, Teddy, I mean, it was cool and I gave them their jackets back and Wayne helped me to hide the money by, tee he, stuffing it in my back pockets, which, huh, T-Rex also recommended several times, but then after a couple of cool down moments, I mean, in the earlier, ahem, non-romantic scuffle and all, I mean, I had to pee myself and since I was so involved in a sports program, I mean, back then a jock strap was my thong, so I pushed my shorts down and used the urinal and then, huh, Wayne and the two thugs made up and even enrolled in a synchronized clapping exercise class by each taking one of the three restroom stalls and I mean, oh boy, a jock strap must be a good inspiration for a synchronized clapping class because immediately, it went all smack, clap, clap, smack..."

"Time! Time out! We knew each other in school and none of that ever happened, the end, period, put a pin in it, call the dealership and ask them how to increase the A/C in my SUV, done!"

"(Giggling from the rear seat girls)"

"Well, a couple of things happened, but not like Fever just told it [cranks up A/C knob], I mean, I was the hero for a day and we may have fallen back a couple of times, which is the only reason that I gripped Fever to be another hero and our embrace may have looked romantic, but it was all harmless and above board, tee he, just as Fever said like nine times, the end, whew. Also [sweating], when is this traffic jam commotion going to get moving, tee he?"

The commotion traffic for parking lot C was not moving.

"Well, I was going to say that I gave the thugs their jackets back, Wayne, so stop being such a bitch about what happened then."

"Nothing! Nothing happened, Fever! I was in Wyoming that weekend."

Wayne was not in Wyoming that weekend. Wayne's last name is not even Wyoming. It's Wilks.

"Well, whatever hero, so, is this a modern date with the guys in the front and the girls in the back then, hmm?"

"(We wish.)"

"(They wish.)"

"Hmm, so [slides head towards rear window], Yvette, Brandi, I know you two were never fans, but..."

"Stop, Freddy Fever. It's just how school worked and we always thought that you had and still have great hair and today, well, I also think that Fever is a great name choice for you, so. Those baggy work pants, not so much, but I can tell that things have worked out for you."

"Oh, Yvette, um, thank you, um, I can tell that both of you are wearing bras, so, if those are the jackets that you two are going to wear inside of the Arena for the concert, I mean, neither of you need to wear your single lady, totally not on a date, logo t-shirts, so?"

"(Giggles) well, you know guys, right, Fever? They freak out when the woman of their dreams let's her bra out in public or fakes the big O in the bed, oops, tee he, did I say that out loud, tee he, oh, look, the entry gates are shaking, so, let's all concentrate on that, tee he."

The entry gate was shaking, but that was from a few employees smacking Henry the key master back to conscientiousness. And stealing his crack pipe since he was passed out.

"Anyways, Fever, I also think that name fits you, so, since you work here, I mean, do you have any hook ups for two totally single ladies then, hmm?"

"Oh, Brandi, maybe, um, hold please."

I mean, as an employee, I do have a few perks, so.

"[Click, click] Lot C for dispatch base [click, click]."

"[Click click] base for FireFever102, hold please, dealing with multiple commotions, over [click, click]."

"OMG! FireFever102? OMG, that's priceless, Fever, I mean, FireFever102! That's fire, sweetie! You have to visit Brandi and I on the Strip some Friday night! I can totally intro a FireFever102 like you!"

"Oh, well, I just said that I filled out this way and filled down that way, so [lifts safety vest and Sports Arena logo t-shirt]?"

"Holy rap opera filled in, filled out and filled down! See, these, tee he, these are details that I keep talking about for our story time later, Fever, ooh, FireFever102, tee he."

"Oh, well, I put in the work, but I'm also on a program, so?"

"And are one of the side effects of your meds program that you only have story time in your jammies on the couch, FireFever102? And I'm not leaving this commotion traffic jam without your phone number, right, FireFever102? I mean, since Wayne's not speaking up, other than his mumbling and since Yvette and Brandi are not paying attention to anything that I'm saying out loud, tee he, so?"

"Oh, please, Ted! A cute boy dressed like a girl and leaning into both of our windows and flashing his estrogen induced butt around, I mean, please, your other tendencies are way behind us now, Ted, so, my precious little FireFever102, which is hot like fire, fire, fire, ahem, you were saying?"

[The two logo t-shirts were starting to come off]

"Oh, the side effects are manageable, tee he, I think, except for every Tuesday morning, I wake up early for my house painting job, only I don't have a house painting job and then every other Thursday, I take an afternoon nap on Grandma Martha's couch in just my undies, only Grandma Martha isn't my real grandma, so, it's all manageable, I think, tee he. And of course, you can have my phone number, Teddy. You won't mind that, right, Wayne?"

"Bah, bah, bah, Grandma Martha is my grandma!"

"[Click, click] Base, go FireFever102 [click, click]."

"[Click, click] Base, Lot C has one unit of four dissatisfied customers code 1025TT1R1 due to commotion caused by Henry the key master being on the crack pipe again and losing his keys, over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] FireFever102, can you resolve with customer service code 404R29B1, over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] negative base, four customers, two separate couples, two males, non-gay, but slightly fag and two hotties, single and ready to mingle, requesting customer resolution code 88T99YQ, over [click, click]."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, FireFever102, what's going on here?"

"Hush, Wayne and let Marlene from dispatch work her magic. Unless you like the nose bleed seats that you screwed up and purchased at the last minute."

"OMG, FireFever102, are you purposely pushing your ass out while leaning into my window?"

[Beep, holla, honk, alright then, beep, call me, honk, take my number, woo]

"Maybe, Wayne, but this is how I mingle and meet people since I don't fit in with the people who hang out on the Strip and I do the best that..."

"[Click click] Base for FireFever102, upgraded Middle-Level tickets for two no-gay, slightly fag males at Will Call ticket station. ID, over? [click, click]."

Well, you can't just let people walk up to the Will Call ticket station without proper ID, so.

[Totally leans into Wayne's window, MWAH]

"[Click click] base, Wayne Wilks and friend, Teddy, Wayne has big fat black lip gloss "mwah" lip print, over [click, click]."

"[Click click] base for FireFever102, confirming two upgraded Middle-Level tickets available at Will Call, code 393TW1, for "look at me now" old crush revenge, pinned with Maude, base over [click, click]."

"Wait, what?"

LOL, when your side seat buddy was still having none of that, right?

"OMG, shut it, Wayne and follow the codes! Tee he, FireFever102 is conducting official Sports Arena business on the squawk box, tee he."

"[Click, click] base to FireFever102, Maude is open for dissatisfied customer service code 182RR, old flame should cry, but you still have feelings for him, base over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] base, FireFever102 turns a teasing blind eye, over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] base to FireFever102, more men should have a special friend like you, FireFever102, base over [click, click]."

"And I hope that you enjoy the concert guys, and..."

"[Click, click] base to FireFever102, I didn't mean my hubby, of course, base out [click, click]"

"The ticket Will Call station has a big blue sign with the name..."

"[Click, click] base to FireFever102, the film producers are looking for a couple of "it" girls, do your hotties qualify, base over [click, click]"

"[Click, click] FireFever102 to base, hottie qualifies, bright red bra, like Fire Fever red with very full cups, under single button jacket, all kinds of face, second hottie, black diamonds tips under possibly buttoned jacket, exotic European face, eyes possibly melt steel, both in Daisy Dukes, over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] base to FireFever102, sending a golf cart, go crazy with your flashlight, give them your two employee passes for floor level VIP Tall Table Cocktail TV frame section, base over [click, click]."

"Ahem!"

[A two single girls mad scramble in the rear seat until the front doors fling open]

"Give me that flashlight, FireFever102! And those employee passes [snatch, snatch]. And come visit us on the Strip some night. Also, huh, I have a toy that fits in my hand just like this, well, never mind and hold still, FireFever102."

[Super reddens the fire fever cheeks while waiting for the golf cart]

"Oh, and give me that [snatch] squawk box! [Click, click] Big Red One to base, over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] go for base Twin Peaks, over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] base, is there a rule that says Red Hot FireFever102 can't drop his oversized work pants, over [click, click]."

"[Click, click] base to Overflowing Volcano Tops, tee he, it sounds like you have peeking into our compliant box, many men and some women have asked that before, base over [click, click]"