Finding Stephanie Ch. 01

Hi all. Sorry I haven't written anything in awhile, the holidays are a difficult time for me. Anyways! I decided to write a different version of Becoming Stephanie because I wanted something that was closer to my real life. The beginning parts of this will be taken directly from my life, the rest will be where I had wish it had gone rather than where it ended up going. Names have been changed to protect the identities of those involved. I will be leaving up the original story because some people liked it, however, I'm not happy with it and I've run out of ideas to finish it. Hope you enjoy!!

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"You're firing me over this? Seriously?" I protested angrily to the on shift supervisor. I didn't like my job that much but it paid well and being 22 years old it was the first job that I was about to be fired from rather than quit.

"I'm sorry Stephen, it's not our decision. The Fed's made this call. You failed one of their test runs... badly and they've decided that retraining you isn't worth it." My boss replied with regret in his voice.

"I'm just so confused, they've given other people the chance to go back down to a level two security. People who haven't been here much longer than I have." I tried to plead my case, this job was the best paying job I ever had as an adult and I didn't want to give it up without a fight.

"Well Stephen to be blunt with you... They missed much harder tests like the Gameboy that was supposed to look like it had been modified to be a trigger for an IED. You on the other hand missed a huge knife that was only wrapped with a hair dryer cord around it... It should have been an easy test." He sighed letting me know the full reason I was being let go.

"I... I was distracted, it won't happen again. I don't want to blame it on anyone... but you have to keep me off the same line as Kaitlyn..." I stopped talking, not wanting to sell her down the river as well then we would be truly screwed on no income rather than one.

"We know the two of you are dating and living together, Kaitlyn and I talk often, you know her bubbly personality and how much she loves to talk about you... But for future reference if you can't keep work and home separate when you step through the doors of work, it might be best to keep those two separated, just some friendly advice from someone who has 35 years of life experience on you... I'm sorry the decision is final. We will expect your uniform returned by the end of the week and we will cut your final paycheck when they are received." The supervisor put a final end to the conversation.

I stood up leaving the small office without saying another word. I walked down the long hallway to the employee room, grabbing my things from my locker, I sent Kaitlyn a text letting her know what had happened and that I would be back later in the day to pick her up since we only had one car between us.

It was a hot spring day and I could feel the sweat pouring off my body as I made the long outdoor walk to the employee parking lot. When I reached my Pontiac Sunfire, I collapsed down in the seat unsure of what to do. I had never been fired before. Kaitlyn and I had just moved in together. Maybe we took things a little too quickly since we had only been dating for 6 months but everything felt so right compared to my previous relationships. She was a heavier set tall girl, brown hair with blonde highlights and the prettiest blue green eyes I had ever seen. She was a 3 years older than me.

Some guys and the porn industry would refer to her as a BBW, big beautiful woman, but I felt that term was demeaning... maybe it was just it's attachment to porn. She was the sweetest most outgoing person I had ever met. Most of the people I drew to me were introverts like myself, she really helped me to come out of my shell. We were into the same kind of music which was actually how we started talking cause she overheard me listening to Atreyu when coming into work. When we started talking more after that, she was already dating another guy who we worked with, I didn't like him at all. I thought he was an asshole and I made sure to tell her that. He was moving back home across the country at the end of the year anyways. She was debating going with him... but before that could happen we started hooking up. Probably not best to start a relationship while she was still in one but life happens.

Kaitlyn and I were about the same height but I was a gym nut. I grew up being called fat and the other f word, so as soon as I was old enough I started spending all my extra time in the gym. I was in great shape but due to never having a ton of extra money for large amounts of food, I was still a relatively small guy especially for someone who worked out so often. Both of my parents were overweight and my Dad was starting to suffer the health consequences of it and I promised myself that I would never let myself get there. Depending on the year that varied. I yo-yoed up and down a lot in weight over the years.

When I started working with and met Kaitlyn I was in the best shape of my life, at least since my first year of high school when I was playing soccer, mostly due to spending all my free time in the gym after a bad breakup and job change. Other than that I had medium length brown hair that I usually slicked back and light blue eyes. People who knew always commented about how my Dad's Slavic genes won out over my Mom's Germanic ones. My grandfather had Anglicized our last name when he arrived because he didn't want to be known as "another dumb Slovak" I hated it and planned to correct it when I eventually got married. I loved my mom's German maiden name but she was happy to marry my dad and have a last name people could spell and pronounce.

I started to think about it and rent wouldn't likely be a problem, it was only $500. We were living in a separate basement unit under another couple from work. Sarah's father was even our landlord so we just paid her rent. I didn't have much for bills thankfully. I owned my car and motorbike outright. I had been given a decent inheritance from my grandfather when I turned 18. It was from his military pension that still had a lot left on it from him dying early in life to lung cancer, he was a pack a day smoker his entire adult life. I promptly blew all of the money but at least I had no debts and an awesome gaming computer to show for it.

As I sat there trying to think about what I would do, I decided there wasn't much point in just sitting in the parking lot. I drove home and took off my work uniform, getting it into the wash so I could return it clean tomorrow when I dropped Kaitlyn off at work and collect my final pay. I looked at the time and realized after sitting in the car for so long, there was only a couple hours until she would be off work, then I could get drunk with Paul, the boyfriend of Sarah, but before that I should have dinner ready for Kaitlyn and I. I decided on a simple spaghetti and meatballs since I didn't feel like putting any additional effort into making any more special. I left the meal in the oven on the lowest temperature to keep it warm so I could make the 15 minute drive back to work... My old work, I corrected myself. It would be weird taking Kaitlyn there and picking her up every work day after being fired.

She must have seen my texts and had been worried that I didn't come back to the security check point after I was pulled off the line as she was already waiting for me at the exit where all employees being picked up went. She got in the car and wrapped her arms around me giving me a big hug, I started to cry a bit. "It will be okay." She tried to reassure me. "We will figure things out, let's just head home for now."

When we got into our basement suite, she went to our bedroom get out of her work uniform. I got dinner plated, then onto our little kitchen table and sat down. She came out and smiled at me, "I know it's not what you want to hear right now but it's really nice to have dinner ready when getting home from work."

I did most of the cooking, other than playing video games, listening to music or riding my little 500cc sport bike, it was one my favorite hobbies. I loved making new recipes, learning how to make a new dish, I spent way too much time watching Food Network if I wasn't playing World of Warcraft with my online friends.

She pulled out a piece of paper after we finished eating and wrote "Budget" at the top of it. "We have $500 for rent, $100 for both of our cell phones combined, $60 for internet, is there anything else I'm missing?"

"Insurance for my car is $150 a month, my gym membership is $40... I really would not like to give that up... and then another $80 or so in gas depending on how many other places we go other than work." I replied thinking of what usually came up monthly for me.

"Okay... and then all we have left is groceries which are usually about $300 a month and other things like body wash, shampoo, my makeup... all that kind of stuff... we may have to combine some things... like you don't necessarily need your own body wash or shampoo once the stuff you have runs out."

"I think they are both pretty close to empty... I was planning on getting them on pay day..."

"Are you that short on money that you were waiting for it?!" she asked in a panic.

"No... it's not that bad, I've got almost $7000 saved up... I was just thinking about upgrading my computer's graphics card and buying a newer faster motorbike." I frowned realizing that those both were now likely out of reach.

"I'm sorry babe... But at least we have a bit of a cushion to get us through until you find a new job... and you still have to a week and half of pay coming for your last pay... So that should bring you up to just over 8 grand?"

"Yeah... should be about that, hard to say if they will charge for having the clothes dry cleaned or if me putting it through the wash will be good enough."

"Okay! So our monthly debits add up to roughly just over $1300 maybe a little more if I need to replenish my makeup... and I make about $2700 a month after taxes... so we will be okay, not enough to continue to save up to buy a townhouse like we talked about but we won't have to eat mac and cheese or instant ramen every night... I've also got some money saved up as well and my credit card is finally paid off... You living here the last few months really helped my budget." She smiled gently.

I thought for a moment, "If worst comes to worst, I could sell my motorbike. It's a '93 so I should be able to get a couple grand for it." I frowned at the thought of having to sell my little red Suzuki.

"I don't think it will come to that, it will just delay our plans of buying a home, no more going out for dinners or concerts... and like you said unfortunately the things you wanted to buy will have to be delayed." The look on her face had a bit of sadness behind it. Going out to dinner once a paycheck was something we both loved and concerts were always a good time.

"I'm sorry Kaitlyn... I screwed up really badly today." I almost told her that I was being distracted by her but I didn't want her to feel like I was placing the blame on her. In the end it was my fault, if I had focused more on the tasks at hand of watching the x-ray machine more closely, I would have caught it.

"It's okay... shit happens. It's life... you can't be expected to be perfect all the time... although I know you try." She giggled a little after saying that.

I looked down at my iPhone 3 and noticed Paul had texted me, letting me know he had picked up a 24 pack of beer and for us to get drunk, commiserate over me being fired.

"I'm going to go upstairs to hang out with Paul... Are you going to come up and hang out with Sarah?" I asked her.

"Yeah... I've got a few things to do down here, like clean up after your cooking." She pointed over to the pile of pots and pans. "And don't forget to put your work clothes in the dryer."

"Oh, I am really sorry... I just finished cooking dinner before I came to pick you up... Would you like help doing dishes?" I felt truly bad about leaving all of my cooking stuff as I walked to the dryer putting my uniform in.

"Nah, it's fine, you go drink with Paul, I'll be up there in 30 minutes or so. You've had a long day as it is." She reassured me.

I sent Paul a quick text message making sure that it was OK that I came up. He responded right away, already waiting on you buddy.

I unlocked the door separating the basement from the upstairs and headed up to find Paul already with the hockey game on, beer in hand, as his usual spot. Sarah passed me a beer as I passed her by on my way to the couch. I sat there in silence Paul yelling at the game knowing not to say anything unless it was a break for commercial. Paul was pretty serious about hockey but he was also a serial bandwagoner that hopped on whatever team looked like they were doing well once it came to playoff time. I had never met somebody with his so many different teams hats and jerseys in my entire life as him.

At the commercial break he finally looked over to me and asked, "you okay buddy?"

"I don't really know how to feel in this moment but I'm sure eventually I will be okay." I replied.

The first period was over and our cities team was already down by 1. I could see Paul wasn't in a great mood but he still actually made an effort tonight.

"So, what happened? I heard you failed a Fed test but not much more than that."

I explained to him what had happened, letting him know that I was distracted but making sure not to blame it on Kaitlyn. Sarah was sitting at the kitchen table behind us working on some cross stitching. She spoke up, "that really sucks Stephen... I'm kinda surprised they didn't give you a second chance."

"Me too... but I guess I fucked up so badly that the Feds wanted me out." I replied frowning. "I'm not sure what I even did wrong. I've been a good employee, I took extra shifts during the holidays, I've come in for overtime when they've asked and I passed the level 3 test on the first try... it took Sven three times to pass. He was almost permanently level 2."

"Oh shit I guess you didn't hear, you weren't the only one fired today, Sven was let go as well, right at the beginning of the night shifts. He failed the same test you did." Paul piped in.

"Well I guess misery loves company... kind of funny that him and I ended up having the exact same start and end date." I added in.

Kaitlyn came up the stairs, "whatcha guys talking about?"

"Apparently Sven got fired as well." Sarah informed her.

"Oh that sucks... I liked Sven, he was a nice older guy but he seemed to hate the job, so I'm sure he's not that broken up about it." Kaitlyn replied.

"He has been a military brat his entire life." I replied "Born on a base in Germany and then served as well. Hopefully he finds something else I know it can be hard for those guys." I informed the group. "He even taught me a little German, mostly how to ask the people going on the Munich flight if they had liquids in their bag." I laughed at the memory. "Hast du Flussigkeiten in deiner Tasche?" I repeated in likely terrible German.

That made the entire group laugh. German sounded a little funny to people who are used to hearing mostly English and a bit of French. The second period started so everyone quieted down, Kaitlyn and Sarah carrying on a different conversation quietly behind us. By the end of the second period Paul had packed away 6 beers and I was working on my fourth.

He looked over, "Feeling any better bud?"

I swished my can, "The beer is helping me not think about it too much. You know me constantly worrying about everything. The beer is helping calm down that voice in my head."

"Well I'm glad to hear that. Don't worry about paying me back for the beer, it's on me tonight."

"Thanks!" I hadn't even thought of the beers and how I usually covered half of it. The game finished with our cities team losing 3 to 0, they were having a terrible year, not that I cared I was never a fan of the local hockey team or really any sports team. I was pretty much forced into playing soccer but it was good for fitness.

Kaitlyn and I went back downstairs to our area and went to bed. We had a pretty active sex life but six beers in and the day I had just had I was in no shape to do anything. I passed out hard as soon as I got undressed.

I awoke to my alarm in the morning realizing that I didn't need it anymore. I usually got up before Kaitlyn and went to the gym. But now that I didn't have a job I could sleep in until I needed to take Kaitlyn into work and go after. I tried to fall back asleep but I had too much on my mind so I woke up and made us breakfast and coffee. I loved making coffee, I had bought a really expensive set of items with my grandfather's money to make the perfect coffee with but we usually didn't have time expect for on our days off, so on our days on we just grabbed Tim Hortons. Kaitlyn came out of the bedroom when I was just about done.

She smiled at me, "nothing better than waking up to the smell of coffee and bacon cooking" she giggled.

"It wouldn't be the healthiest thing but I'd happily make you bacon every morning" I replied "but I could absolutely just make you breakfast and coffee every morning."

"I would love that, it would be a lot of help. I was thinking about it and I think I'm going to pick up at least one possibly two overtime shifts since we have three days off a week... well not you I guess just me now... sorry." Her words stung a little but I knew there was no hurt meant behind them.

"The extra money would be nice but I would miss seeing you especially if you only had one day off a week." I replied.

"Well, if we would still like to buy a townhouse of our own we need to get saving as much as we can and I won't be able to see much on one salary." She reasoned.

"You're right. I'm going to update my resume and start applying for jobs today."

"I'm glad to hear that hopefully you find something quick I know the job market has been pretty crap with the economic downturn due to the subprime mortgage crisis. Those Occupy Wall Street people are still there hoping things will change."

"It hasn't hit us quite as hard up here but I've definitely noticed things slowing down a little bit."

"Just try your best. If I have to be the sole breadwinner for a while it's not the end of the world."

We eat breakfast in relative silence. After Kaitlyn went to go shower to get ready work and I changed it to my gym clothes. We parked in the employee parking lot likely for the last time as I needed to turn in my uniform. I took the long walk with her into the building, We kissed and I told her I would see her after work. I went to the on duty supervisor to hand in my uniform. Wednesday looked over the uniform and made sure that there was no holes in it for any permanent stains, they handed me my final paycheck which apparently was already ready to go.

I took the long walk back to the employee parking lot thinking that it was kind of strange, the place I'd spent the last year of my life never be back in this building again unless I choose to fly somewhere. I went to the bank to deposit my final paycheck and then headed off to the gym. I probably went a little too hard and I knew I was going to feel it tomorrow but I had a lot of anger and frustration to workout.

I arrived back home and booted up my computer. I got to work updating my resume and looking into all the job listing sites. Kaitlyn was right there wasn't much out there especially for entry level positions being that I only had a high school education. I searched all the different sites for a few hours before giving up and booting up wow. I set myself an alarm just in case I lost track of time which I often did while playing so that I wouldn't forget to pick up Kaitlyn and have dinner ready before that. I set it as a permanent alarm and change my morning alarm that it would only be an hour before Kaitlyn's, rather than two hours before, so I could make her breakfast and coffee.