For Twelve Month and a Day

"Okay, everybody, what are the colors of Halloween?" Jerry asked the kids.

"Orange and black!" chanted all the smock-clad children, who were spread out across the brightly-lit community centre room, its walls already wonderfully crammed with their artwork.

"That's right," Jerry said. "But I'll tell you what I think. I think if you want to use every color in your paint set, that's just fine! If your Halloween story has blue witches and green pumpkins, go ahead and paint those, all right?"

"Jerry!" called out little Amy, always a stickler for the rules. "My mom says you should paint realistically!"

Jerry walked over to Amy's table and squatted down to her eye level. "Tell you what, Amy," he said. "When you imagine the picture you want to paint, do you see only orange pumpkins and black bats and witches in black dresses?"

"Well, no," Amy said. "I see a green field with lots of kids to play with, and pumpkins of every color around the edges."

"Then paint that!" Jerry said. "And if your mother asks you why, just say that's what you imagined. That's what imagination is for!"

"I guess," Amy said. Though she didn't look sure of herself at all, she did start painting a purple pumpkin in the corner of the page, where she'd already painted her name in pink.

"Good for you, Amy." Jerry patted her back and stood up to have a look around the room. Most of the other kids were busy using every color in the rainbow. He was pleased. That pleasure was deepened when he glanced out into the hallway and saw Megan and Ellen peering in at him. They clearly liked what they saw. Jerry gave them a friendly wave and turned his attention to little Tommy's rather graphic painting of a ghost chasing a dog.

"He sure is great with those kids," Megan said. "Even that little brat Amy. I wish he'd volunteered sooner."

"He hasn't been in town that long, you know," Ellen said. "But the move's been good for him, obviously."

"Good for him?" Megan asked. "What, he's not a recovering druggie or anything, is he?"

"That's not funny, Megan." Ellen turned to head down the hall to the office from which she and Megan ran the centre.

"What? I was just asking." Megan followed her best friend, whose politically correct seriousness she was all too used to. "Say, you don't know if he's got a date for the centre party yet, does he?"

Ellen looked back in surprise. "Oh, Megan, don't go there!"

"What is your problem, Ellen? He's a nice guy and I'm just wondering!"

"It's not my story to share," Ellen said. "But what I can tell you is, don't bother."

"He has a girlfriend, then?"

"Not anymore."

Megan took one last look at Jerry. She'd heard Ellen, but he was looking adorable as ever as he helped little Lisa with her brushstrokes. A wounded soul? Surely she could help heal it!

It took Jerry the better part of an hour to wash the brushes and get the tables cleaned up after the kids had gone, but he didn't begrudge it in the least. Nothing made him happier these days than sharing the joy of art with the kids. Besides, all that awaited him afterward was a long workout at the gym -- well worth the effort and he'd be glad he'd done it as always, but a hassle nonetheless -- and then another night of fighting off the ghost of Johnson Spivak. To avoid that, Jerry would have happily spent the whole night washing paintbrushes.

He'd taken up painting himself in jail last winter. It had made the time pass by better than anything else while he'd waited to see if they were going to compound the tragedy by bringing him up on assault and battery charges. Ultimately they hadn't -- Jerry's lawyer had reassured him from the start that everyone on his jury would be wishing they'd been the one who'd beaten Johnson Spivak within an inch of his life, and the prosecutor knew it -- but he'd nevertheless had to cool his heels for three months in that man-made hell.

So of course he'd come to love bright colors no matter the occasion. He loved them just like he loved Sarah and her partner Randi for taking him in after the charges had been dropped back in February, and like he loved their little town and the chance it had given him to start over, and like he would always love Janet.

He ought to go visit Janet tomorrow, he reminded himself as he put the final touches on tidying the room. The idea brought him no relief, not like it had the first few times he'd gone to visit her, but the thought of not going made him feel awfully guilty.

Not anymore...what had Ellen meant by that? And if he was single, why should she keep her distance? Megan was still wondering about that when art class let out and she knew Jerry would be heading to the gym across the street like always. She also knew Ellen was usually right about these things, but then Ellen had been settled in a relationship with a lovely guy since college and didn't know a thing about finding eligible men in their little town. So Megan threw caution to the wind and headed for the gym as soon as she'd seen the last of the kids carrying their Halloween paintings off.

Her hopes were answered scarcely ten minutes into her long run on the treadmill. Megan gave Jerry the brightest smile she could muster through her intense workout, and was delighted when he responded in kind before heading for the weights. She had a few miles to go before any flirting might take place, but she welcomed the time to admire him from afar and let him return the favor if he wanted.

Jerry did return the favor. He'd long since noticed the great shape Megan was in, and he'd seen her at the gym enough times to know why. Today Megan was smoldering as usual in her jog bra and yoga pants, and the sight was especially welcome after a gray autumn day that was now nearly dark outside. Jerry, struggling gallantly to complete a set of ten shoulder presses, kept his glances to a respectable minimum. That, plus a sense of guilt and loyalty to Janet, made it easy for him to hide his delight when he realized Megan was done and was coming to say hello.

Hidden or not, though, he certainly felt delighted. Megan was absolutely glowing as she stepped over to him. A fine sheen of sweat made her toned body glisten in the fluorescent light as she stepped off the machine and grinned at Jerry, who hoped he hadn't been seen gazing at her. He threw himself back into his pressing as always.

"How's it coming along?" she asked him as she approached.

"Up a notch from last week," he said optimistically.

"That's great! Keep it up!"

"I get tired just watching you," Jerry confessed. "You're killing it as always."

"Oh, Jerry, I used to feel the same way!" Megan said. "Maybe Sarah can tell you, I got into this in the first place because I was struggling with my weight. That's how I got stuck with these," she added, taking a swipe at her detested large breasts, which were clamped tightly into a sports bra at least a size too small for them.

"Aw, Megan, c'mon, they're beautiful!" Jerry couldn't resist, although he did wonder how Megan could breathe in that bra.

Megan returned the smile that had been making her heart melt for weeks at least. "Thank you. But they sure can get in the way sometimes. In any case, Jerry, when I first made up my mind to get in shape, I had the same reaction you did, thinking I could never do that. You just have to believe, though, if you don't give up, you can do it too. And you can!" She flexed her remarkably muscular arms for show, and to his shame, Jerry couldn't help but think of how delightful they would feel around him, how safe he would be in the embrace of a woman who could easily beat the daylights out of him -- but of course never would. He'd have to take care of something in the shower, that he knew.

"I sure will stick with it, Megan," Jerry grunted as he finished off the last of his set. He sat up straight and took his turn with a drink of water. "Thanks for the encouragement."

"You deserve it." Megan sat down beside him on the bench and patted his shoulder, sending a fleeting shockwave of joy through his body. "I've been wanting to tell you, I adore how great you are with those kids. I didn't get to see too many of the paintings today, but I saw you got them to use plenty of colors. Orange and black alone is so boring!"

"I think so too," Jerry said. "And thanks. I love those kids. Can't wait for the party, I just hope I can keep them from eating too much of the candy at once."

"Are you coming to the adult party afterward?" Megan steeled herself for any response she might receive to that.

"Oh, I don't know," Jerry said. "I think Sarah and Randi might have some plans for that night."

"I think they're coming to the party, Jerry. They always have before." Megan remembered well how Jerry's college friend and her partner had in fact been a mainstay of the Halloween party all four years they'd been in town.

"Oh, okay," Jerry said. "Well, then maybe I will. We'll see." He smiled through his strife at that suggestion.

"Isn't that what your parents always said when they really meant 'no'?" Megan teased.

Jerry laughed - busted! "Yeah, I guess it is," he said. "But, I mean, I just don't know if I'll be free that night. But I'll think about it."

"I do hope you'll come," Megan said. "We've all loved getting to know you all these months, but you never seem to join in for anything just for fun." She stood up. "Speaking of just for fun, I'm going to take a dip in the pool. Care to join me?"

"Oh, I can't," Jerry lied. "I'm meeting Randi and Sarah for dinner." That much was true, it just wasn't for two hours yet. But there was no way Megan was ever going to talk him into joining her for a swim. It was bad enough resisting a beautiful woman when he hadn't seen her in a swimsuit, after all.

"Well, don't let me keep you from that," Megan said. "Tell them I said hi?"

"I sure will," Jerry said. "Enjoy the pool."

"That's a promise!" Megan said over her shoulder, hiding her disappointment as she headed for the locker room.

As soon as she was gone, Jerry got up and went over to the punching bags. He was glad Megan had told him she'd be in the pool for a bit, for he didn't want anyone he knew very well seeing him at the punching bag. He'd never even let Sarah see that, though he knew she would understand just fine. But it was something he just didn't want to have to discuss with anyone.

Jerry, who'd never hit anyone before a year ago, who'd never even liked to watch boxing on TV, had grown very adept at the punching bag. He lay into it now as viciously as ever, thundering one fist after another in rapid repetition, never giving the bag a chance to swing back all the way, barely feeling the least bit sore or tired as he went along. Anyone who saw him was treated to the sight of a slight but spry young man who could have beaten a man three times his size in that moment.

But Jerry didn't know if anyone saw him or not. He kept his eyes trained on the punching bag at all times, pretending it was emblazoned with Johnson Spivak's face.

Her disappointment notwithstanding, Megan was feeling utterly delighted about her conversation with Jerry as she went downstairs to change for the pool. Maybe he felt shy about her seeing him in his swimming trunks? Megan could identify, as she hated the way she could never hope to hide her breasts in a swimsuit. But that thought only further endeared him to her as she collected a towel and undressed for the pre-swim shower. She imagined him blossoming forth at the poolside and his eyes meeting hers, both of them dressed so skimpily.

It's okay, Jerry, I'm a little shy, too. And you have a beautiful body!

He certainly did in her imagination as Megan turned the shower on and stepped into the hot spray. Grateful for the private showers, not like the communal ones of accursed memory at her college, she didn't even try to resist the temptation to play a little. She wasn't surprised to find she was wet in a place the shower couldn't reach.

Splashing about happily with Jerry, swimming nude with him, then they were on a nice dry couch somewhere and he was fondling her breasts in the gentlest way, she climbed on top of him, the look in his eyes as she took him inside her...that, when Megan hit upon it, was the moment she wanted to come to. She closed her eyes and rubbed harder as she once again imagined sliding him into her hot wet embrace, his eyes opening wide as he lost all control and yelped in pleasure as she squeezed him tightly within...

Megan barely kept her mouth shut as she came. She opened her eyes and savored the joy of the moment she was quite sure she could bring about sooner or later.

Feeling satiated for the moment but still wonderfully turned on, Megan patted her body dry with her towel but opted not to bother wrapping herself in it. She strode back to the lockers, wearing nothing but a smile and enjoying the furtive looks she got from some of the older women along the way.

Funny looks or not, no one said anything to Megan until she'd arrived at her locker and was opening it to get her swimsuit. "Hi, Megan!"

She turned to see Sarah, Jerry's friend and his excuse for not joining her for a swim, just arriving. "Sarah," she said. "Hi. You're not just hitting the pool now, are you?"

"Why not?" Sarah said. "This is probably when it's least busy while I'm not working, you know."

"Oh, well, of course." Megan hurried on her swimsuit now, suddenly feeling a lot less free-spirited. "It's just that...I just saw Jerry upstairs and he said you were having dinner with him tonight."

"We are," Sarah confirmed. "But not for..." She checked her watch. "A couple of hours yet. Besides, it's Randi's turn to cook."

"Oh," Megan said. "Cool." But it wasn't. Why couldn't Jerry just tell her he didn't want to come swimming with her?

"Jerry did offer to help her, but she insisted. It's been a year this week, you know."

"Has it!" Megan didn't know what "it" was, but clearly it wasn't good. Was that what Ellen had been referring to?

"I'm afraid so," Sarah said. "He's been handling it amazingly well, but still. I'm so glad he came out here, but that alone is only so much help."

"Yeah, I guess," Megan said. Her suit and cap were on, but somehow it didn't feel right to take her leave just yet.

"Enjoy your swim!" Sarah said, and all at once Megan realized she'd been watching her undress.

"Thanks," Megan said. "I will!" And as she turned to go out to the pool, she resolved to do just that and not let Jerry's subterfuge bother her -- he obviously had a good reason, whatever it was.

But she also wasn't going to tamp down her feelings for him. That was a challenge she didn't even want to try for just now.

Jerry was on time, and none the wiser, when he arrived at Randi and Sarah's house with a bottle of wine later that night. "Come on in!" Sarah said, stepping aside at the door. "Dinner's almost ready, but Randi doesn't want anyone else near the kitchen until it is."

"Reminds me of my mom," Jerry said. "I know better than to argue."

"I'll just sneak in and get a corkscrew for this," Sarah said, taking the bottle. She left Jerry to settle himself on the couch, where he made the mistake of looking off to the side. "Oh, man." Jerry took a deep breath and turned back to face the other side of the room.

He was still looking agitated when Sarah returned with two glasses of his wine. "Jerry, what's wrong?" Then just as quickly, she realized. "Oh, no, I should've covered that up! Here, I can do it now." She set the glasses on the table and grabbed and afghan and threw it over the supply of candy and decorations for next week. "I'm sorry, Jerry!"

"Not your fault," Jerry said. "Just tell me, none of those are...ours, are they?"

"No," Sarah reassured him as she sat beside him on the couch. He and Janet had had a big stack of their own Halloween decorations last year, and they'd stayed right where they were on the living room floor until Sarah and Randi had helped him clean out the apartment after he got out jail. "No, we gave those to Goodwill, I think."

"Cool," Jerry said, sipping his wine. "I'm sorry I let that bother me."

"Jerry, it's fine!" Sarah reassured him. "You don't owe anyone an apology here. It totally makes sense to me. Especially now."

"One year, huh?" Jerry mused.

"She'd want you to move on, I'm sure."

"Maybe so, but I don't even know who I'd move on with."

Sarah's eyes lit up. "Oh, I do!" But Randi interrupted with the announcement that dinner was ready before she could share the news.

"Oh, Randi, this looks wonderful!" Jerry said as they sat down to the vegetarian lasagne and salad. "Thanks again for having me over. I probably shouldn't be alone this weekend, you know."

"We do," Randi said. "We're really proud of you for making it through the year, you know."

"Right, and as I was saying, Jerry..." Sarah interjected.

"Yes, you were playing matchmaker, were you?" Jerry smiled through his inclination to tell her not to bother -- his old friend meant well, after all.

"Well, not really," Sarah said. "But I saw Megan in the locker room tonight, at the gym, and --" She paused and joined in on Jerry's laughter. "Yes, yes, I saw her, but that's not what I meant."

"Surely you know women don't just walk around naked in there anyway, Jerry," Randi pointed out.

"Actually, she was doing that," Sarah said. "And she's got a beautiful body, incidentally."

"Lucky you," Jerry said.

"Not really, I can look but I'll never be welcome to touch her," Sarah reminded him. "But my point, Jerry. She asked about you."

"Really?" Jerry was not displeased with the news, though he also felt crushing guilt.

"Yes," Sarah said. "Jerry, I think she's got her eye on you."

"Oh, gosh..." Jerry fumbled for something to say to that, and punted with a mouthful of lasagne instead.

"Go for it, Jerry," Randi added. "She's a great gal. We've known her ever since we came to town and she's always had a good word for everyone."

"And she's beautiful," Sarah said. "Everywhere," she added with a saucy grin.

"Sarah, he might not be attracted to the same things you are, you know," Randi pointed out.

"No, no, we are," Jerry admitted. "That's how we became friends in the first place, lusting after the same gals in college."

"Good answer," Randi laughed, having just realized what that meant as to Jerry's opinion of her.

"Yeah, Megan's great," Jerry allowed, "And she is cute. But...I don't know...Janet..."

"She'd want you to move on, Jerry," Sarah said.

"I don't know about that," Jerry said. "Tell you the truth, she was kind of jealous. She didn't even like it when I talked to you on the phone, you know."

"Surely you told her I was no threat!" Sarah was too amused to take any offense.

"Repeatedly," Jerry said. "Yeah, she had some real issues. We were working on that, you know, but not making a whole lot of progress."

"Well, Jerry, it's nobody's business but yours when you're ready to move on," Randi said. "But I also think no matter what Janet would've thought, Megan's a wonderful woman and you ought to at least think about it."

"I will think about it," Jerry said. "Thanks."

He insisted on helping to wash the dishes, and politely declined their invitation to join them for a horror movie afterward. "Never was my thing, you know," he said.

"Right, Mister I-Love-Romances," Sarah said. "Well, thanks for the wine and the good conversation."

"And thanks for the image of Megan in the locker room," Jerry quipped. Both women roared with laughter as they hugged him good night.

Joking aside, the lovely image he conjured up did keep him occupied through the chilly walk home. Was Sarah right about her? Maybe he should have joined her for that swim after all...but then, he'd have surely been hard as a rock the whole time and there'd have been no hiding that.