Getting Even - Pt. 02

Lots of people are the victims of cheaters. It's a common problem. Dan Caruso had a unique reaction when he learned his wife Lois was having sex with her boss. You might be amused by the story. All characters are adults over the age of 21.

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Lois opened the envelope and found a copy of my divorce filing. It took a few moments for her to figure out what she was holding, but she finally got as angry as I'd ever seen.

"What the hell is this about!?" she screamed.

"I think it's self-explanatory," I said calmly.

"So this is how you tell me you want a divorce!?" Lois said. "No counseling? No discussion? Nothing?"

"There's nothing to discuss," I said.

"So you took me upstairs and fucked me this morning even though you knew about this?!"

"You said you enjoyed it," I said.

She roared out in anger. "You dirty motherfucker! I am going to take you to court and get every cent you own!" she said.

"That's your plan?" I said.

"Hell yes!" she said.

It was at that moment that the doorbell rang again.

"I wonder who that could be?" I asked, knowing exactly who it was. Lois gave me a withering look, then went to open the door.

It was my lawyer Cindy. As soon as the door opened, she walked in without being invited. She was trailed by a young man I'd never met. "Hello, Mrs. Caruso. I'm Cindy Mansfield, your husband's attorney. This is my paralegal, William Parson. We have some things you need to see."

"Get the fuck out of my house!" Lois screamed.

"Actually, this is your husband's house," Cindy said. "He bought this property before you got married. His name is on the deed. He invited us. But we are here for your benefit, Mrs. Caruso. William and I have something urgent to share with you. It will only take a few minutes."

As Cindy spoke, William opened a briefcase and removed a laptop. He turned it on and clicked on the file containing Lois' sex video. "Why don't you have a seat, Mrs. Caruso?" Cindy said. "Play the video, William."

Without a word, Lois looked at the screen and saw herself and her boss enter the motel room. Her eyes got big and wide. Lois is a nasty, vindictive bitch, but she isn't stupid. She knew what she was about to see and hear.

"Get on your knees and suck my cock, you whore!" Joe said. The sound quality was excellent. Cindy's laptop had very good speakers.

As the seconds ticked by, Lois' face got white. All her anger drained away as she stared at the screen. At some point she realized that William was paying unusually close attention to the video, and he seemed to be enjoying the show. I later learned that Cindy had told William to act like he was titillated by watching Lois have sex.

"Do you mind!? This is none of your business!" Lois snapped.

"Actually, Mrs. Caruso, I instructed William to examine this video to help him research laws relevant to your divorce," Cindy said. The tactic was intended to force Lois to realize that lots of people would be fascinated by such a lurid video. William acted like a teenage boy watching his favorite porn actress.

This was the most entertaining drama I've ever seen. Frida told me that Cindy was ruthless, and I was particularly impressed with the way she pretended to be there for Lois' benefit.

At some point I noticed something so entertaining I could barely resist the urge to laugh. Lois was squirming around on her chair. It was so pronounced that it made me wonder why she was doing it.

Suddenly, I realized that her butt had to hurt from the punishment I'd given it earlier. In the past, I'd whipped her ass hard enough that she was sore for a few hours. This time, I'd whipped her so hard that she must be in serious pain. Plus, I'd fucked her little butthole so forcefully that it surely felt tender. That pain must be distracting, I thought as I watched Lois wince while she stared at the computer screen.

This was turning out to be a delightful day.

The video was almost over when Lois finally got so angry she exploded. "So what! This doesn't prove anything! Adultery is not illegal! It makes no difference in a divorce! If you think this will force me to go easy on you in court, you just wait and see what happens!"

"I'm glad you mentioned that, Mrs. Caruso," Cindy said. "You are absolutely correct. The court doesn't care that you cheated on your husband. Legally, it makes no difference in divorce proceedings.

"Still, if you choose to contest your divorce, I will file this video with the court. It is relevant because it speaks to the state of your marriage.

"Court filings are public. Lots of people will see this video, and there's a very real chance that it would have unforeseen effects. Imagine what would happen if someone on the board of directors learned about this video. I'm sure Mr. Johnson would lose his job. So would you. Why risk that? I've persuaded your husband to let you settle this divorce quietly. Wouldn't you like me to go back to my office and lock this video away in files no one ever sees?"

You could almost hear the wheels turning inside Lois' head. She liked her job. Being the secretary of a top executive paid more than she'd ever earned before. And, of course, she enjoyed extra benefits during lunch-hour flings with her boss. She didn't want to lose that job, which is exactly what would happen if people at her company saw the video.

Cindy let Lois stew for a moment, then resumed her high-pressure sales pitch intended to get Lois to quickly accept the divorce settlement. "Mrs. Caruso, I persuaded your husband to not let his hurt feelings motivate him to destroy you. I've urged him to just end this marriage in a way that allows both of you to painlessly start the next chapters of your lives.

"Any lawyer could tell you that Mr. Caruso could take you to court and quickly obtain a very favorable divorce. But I've persuaded him to avoid a big public brawl that will embarrass you and your boss, Mr. Johnson. All that is important is that he gets a clean break. I'm sure that once you've had a chance to think about it, you'll agree that a clean break is in your interest, too."

Cindy pulled out a stack of papers and shoved them in front of Lois. "I've written up a divorce settlement that serves the interests of you and your husband. You can read it. The bottom line is that your husband will give you a quick, easy divorce if you agree to leave without an unpleasant legal battle. I've persuaded him to offer you some incentives to do this."

Cindy held up a key. "This key unlocks a short-term rental property. It's a very nice vacation condo. Fully furnished. Mr. Caruso has paid for the first 30 days of rent. You're going to need a place to live. Here's a free home you can enjoy while you get back on your feet."

Cindy then held up a debit card. "This card is linked to an account with $5,000 deposited by your husband. You'll need money over the next few weeks. This should be more than enough for your immediate needs. Think of it as a goodbye gift from the man you used to love."

This was happening fast, and I could tell Lois was struggling to absorb it all. That was Cindy's plan. She wanted to present this information so quickly that Lois didn't have enough time to realize it was a mistake. A sensible woman would know she shouldn't do anything without talking to a lawyer first. But Lois had never been a particularly sensible woman, and learning about the existence of the video made it hard for her to think straight. It was all going according to Cindy's plan to get that bitch out of my life with almost nothing.

"It's a good deal, Mrs. Caruso. It's a lot better than you'll get if you decide to contest the divorce. It won't make the video public. It provides everything you need to start the next chapter of your life." Cindy withdrew a pen from her briefcase and handed it to Lois. "It's in your best interest to sign this today," Cindy said.

I noticed that every time Cindy used the words "it's in your best interest," the words that followed were about things that were definitely NOT in Lois' best interest. That settlement specified that Lois got to keep her personal belongings, her car, and nothing else. The house, personal property, investment account and retirement account went to me. I thought that was fair because Lois had not saved a penny during her whole life. She spent every cent of her income on things ranging from designer shoes and purses to trips to the spa. I was the one who'd saved everything. Still, divorce law held that Lois was legally entitled to one-half of all assets accumulated during our marriage. Cindy knew that a lawyer would advise her to negotiate a better deal. She wanted to get Lois' signature before she had time to talk to a lawyer.

But Lois wasn't completely confused yet. "I'd like to think about this for a few days," Lois said.

"That is certainly within your rights," Cindy said. "You can take your copy of this settlement and review it as long as you wish. But you need to know that your husband's offer to give you $5,000 and a place to live for the next month is contingent on getting an agreement today. Those offers go away if we don't settle right now.

"Lois, divorce lawyers aren't cheap," Cindy said. Notice she called Lois by her first name, as though they were buddies. Brilliant. "If you hire a lawyer, you will incur significant legal bills. If we can resolve this today, it will make everything much easier for you."

I had a hard time listening to this without laughing. It reminds me of buying a new car from a high pressure salesman. Those guys almost always ask customers "What will it take for us to put you in a new car today?" What's the hurry? They act as though I won't get as good a deal if I wait a day, or a week, or a month. Who made that rule? It's never true. The best thing a car buyer can do is slow things down and use the time to press for a lower price. But Cindy was doing an excellent job convincing Lois that she should sign a divorce settlement she hadn't even read first.

It worked.

"OK," Lois said. "Where do I sign?"

Cindy showed Lois where to sign. It turned out that William was a notary public, so he notarized the document right then. Cindy took the notarized settlement, stuffed it in her briefcase, and locked it away before Lois had time to reconsider.

I was divorced! And I didn't have to give Lois nearly as much of my money as the law normally requires! That sex video did a great job persuading Lois to get out of my life immediately.

"Lois, the next order of business is getting you relocated," Cindy said. "Here's the debit card and the key to your new home. I realize you must have personal belongings you want to take with you, so I persuaded your husband to hire movers to help you tonight."

"Tonight?" Lois said. "I have to move tonight?"

"Of course," Cindy said. "That's part of the settlement you just signed. Besides, Lois, you don't want to spend any more time here than necessary, do you? You'll be a lot more comfortable in your own place." Cindy sent a text, and within minutes a moving van pulled up in the driveway. Two young men with empty boxes came in, packed up her clothes and personal items, loaded them in the truck, and drove away.

I happened to be standing in the front room watching as Lois got into her car, and I noticed that she grimaced when she slid into her seat. I broke out laughing when I realized that her butt still hurt from all the punishment I'd dished out a few hours ago. For some reason, I got a great deal of satisfaction from the knowledge that as Lois drove away for the last time, she was thinking about the pain I caused by whipping and fucking her ass.

Cindy gave me a card. "Dan, here's the number of a locksmith who does work on short notice. He's expecting your call. Get your locks changed tonight. I doubt that Lois will give you any trouble, but I'm sure she's going to get mad when she finally gets around to reading the settlement. She probably doesn't realize yet that her credit cards no longer work. She doesn't realize yet that she's agreed to stay away from you, your home, and your place of employment. If she decides there's some item she wants, or she wants to argue with you about something, being able to keep her locked out will be important."

"I'll do that right away. And I plan to block her telephone number," I said.

"Good plan," Cindy said. "Congratulations, Dan. You are divorced. William will file this settlement as soon as the courthouse opens Monday morning. You are free."

"Cindy, I am so grateful," I said. "Frida said you are the best in the business. I will be sure to tell her she was right."

"Please do," Cindy said. "It will be something worth mentioning the next time the firm reviews me for partnership. I'm going to make sure to let everybody know that I got this settlement signed, and your wife out the door, in less than three hours from the time we served the papers. That's my record.

"Of course, I expect to break that record tonight. William and I are going over to Frida's to do the same thing to her husband Joe. Since they have a prenup, there won't be any need for me to give him some big high-pressure sales pitch. He'll realize he's screwed the moment he sees the video.

"By the way, I'd like to ask your permission for something. Once a month a group of local divorce lawyers meet down at a local bar to talk about business and have cocktails. I thought it would be entertaining if I showed them this video, but I won't do it without your approval."

"You have my approval," I said. "Show it to anyone you want. Show it to other lawyers. Show it to your friends. Show it at your next family reunion. Show it at your college alumni picnic. As far as I'm concerned, you can post it on one of those online porn sites that feature amateur videos. I don't care how many people see it. The more, the merrier."

Cindy laughed. "I'll do my part."

"Those two were breaking all kinds of rules - not just their wedding vows," I said. "It would be simple justice if they got caught."

The house was strangely quiet after Cindy and William left. I realized I would have to get used to living in an empty home. I expected it would be wonderful to never have to listen to another snide remark from Lois.

I got a beer from the kitchen, sat down, and turned on a football game. I couldn't concentrate on the TV because I was so happy, so I decided to call my sister Betty so she could celebrate with me.

"That video you got just saved me a lot of money and hassle," I told her. "Lois signed the divorce settlement. She's moved out. I am officially divorced from that bitch!"

"Wow. That was fast," Betty said. "How'd you manage that?"

"I had a good lawyer. Also, I have a great sister who provided a video that Lois does not want anyone to see. Ever. She was willing to sign anything if it meant the video wouldn't be filed with the court."

"I thought that might happen," Betty said.

"But the funny thing is, some people are going to see the video anyway," I said. I explained that Cindy planned to play the video at the next meeting with other divorce lawyers. Betty laughed out loud. "Cindy should be sure to let those lawyers drink a beer or two before she shows the video," Betty said. "I'm sure it will be more entertaining to people who've had a drink first."

"Good idea. I'll suggest that to Cindy," I said.

We chatted for a while, then my cell phone began letting me know I was getting another call. It was from Frida.

"Cindy tells me she got your ex to sign the settlement and move out of the house in less than three hours," Frida said.

"Cindy is amazing," I said. "She deserves to be made a partner at your law firm."

Frida laughed. "She told you to say that, didn't she?"

"Maybe," I said.

"Cindy has nothing to worry about," Frida said. "She's a bit young to get a partnership, but the firm needs to move fast to make that happen. We need to make her a partner before some other firm recognizes her potential and makes her a better offer. Next week, I'm going to start the process of having the other partners vote. Our firm handles a lot of high-stakes divorces. Cindy is the right lawyer to handle the work. That girl is going to make a lot of money for our firm," Frida said.

"And herself, I hope," I said.

"Have no doubt. She's going to be shopping for a fancy vacation home real soon," Frida said.

We chatted for a while, then Frida let me know the real reason she was calling. "Dan, I want to be sure you understand how grateful I am. I saved a lot of money today. I will never have to see my asshole husband ever again. You removed a huge burden off my shoulders. I can't think of words to express my gratitude."

"The words you're using right now seem pretty good to me," I said. "Frida, I'm very glad to feel that way. I started all this to get out of a bad marriage. It's wonderful that it did the same thing for you."

Before we hung up, I mentioned that Cindy planned to show the video at the next meeting of local divorce attorneys. Frida laughed. "She just wants to show off," Frida said.

"My sister said Cindy should make sure the other lawyers have a few drinks before she shows them the video."

"Ooooo. That's great advice. I would not have thought of that," Frida said. "I'm sure the showing will be more festive if everybody is a little bit drunk."

"I'm just happy that other people will get to see the video. If we're lucky, somebody will tell the people at the company where Joe and Lois work. Wouldn't that be nice?"

"It would be the best possible outcome," Frida said.

I felt pretty good when I went to bed that night. It was wonderful to go to sleep without Lois beside me. I felt pretty good the next morning. But I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that I wished I could show the video to everyone who works with Joe and Lois. It bothered me that those two would be able to continue their lives without paying for their betrayals.

You can probably figure out what I decided to do.

I went online and found a bunch of porn sites that feature amateur videos. The legality of "revenge porn" is complicated. But regardless of the law, there's not much anyone can do about it, and law enforcement almost never tries. If the victim is an adult who consented to the sex, nobody cares if somebody recorded it without permission. Still, I wanted to be careful to conceal my identity as the person who leaked the video. I needed to send the file to the site and make it look like someone else sent it.

I'm pretty good with computers, so I knew how to remove the video file's metadata that traced it back to me and Betty. I knew how to set up email accounts that couldn't be linked to anyone.

I decided to make it appear that Joe sent the video because he wanted to brag about having sex with Lois. So I took the file and arranged to have some text scroll across the screen before the action began. Here's what I wrote:

MY NAME IS JOE JOHNSON. I'M THE CHIEF FINANCIAL OFFICER FOR MAJOR FASTENERS, INC. MY SECRETARY IS LOIS CARUSO.

LOIS IS NOT VERY BRIGHT, BUT I DIDN'T HIRE HER FOR HER BRAINS. I HIRED HER BECAUSE SHE'S A HOT PIECE OF ASS.

LOIS HAS TO FUCK ME IF SHE WANTS TO KEEP HER JOB. SHE COMPLAINS, BUT SHE ACTUALLY LOVES IT WHEN I FORCE HER TO GO TO A MOTEL AND FUCK HER BRAINS OUT.

THIS VIDEO SHOWS WHAT WE DO 2-3 TIMES A WEEK. THE BEST PART IS, MY EMPLOYER HAS NO IDEA I'M CHARGING THE HOTEL ROOM TO MY CORPORATE EXPENSE ACCOUNT. I'M FUCKING MY BOSS AND MY SECRETARY AT THE SAME TIME!

I have no idea if Joe is paying for the motel or charging it to his expense account, but I imagined that claim would get the attention of the people who run the company.

I downloaded the video to four amateur porn sites. Three of them have moderators who view content before posting it to the site, but one let me put it online immediately. It wasn't long before users were viewing the video. They must have liked it, because the number of views increased very quickly. Folks were obviously sending the link to their friends, and those friends were forwarding the link to more friends.