Gumdrop Ch. 18-19

Author's note:

Finally Gumdrop's story approaches its end... This is the last submission before the finale in chapters 20 and 21.

As absurd as the concepts of hucows and ponygirls are, I tried to take them quite seriously, to delve in the psychology of a hucow or a ponygirl and her owner, in search of what these admittedly strange fetishes mean, at least to me. Therefore, beside the tropes of the genre (kinky sex, humiliation and de-humanization), you will find the musings of a young girl who chooses to become a cow in a quest for true love and a place in the world.

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18. Animal lovers

"Hi Aidan! Is everything alright? It's not you turn at the machines, yet." said the asshole who woke me up, in the middle of the night.

"Yes, sure, couldn't sleep." whispered Aidan, trying to shake the other off.

"Ok!" replied, still loudly, the stranger, who did not seem to be able to get hints.

I heard a sigh. What was Aidan doing in the stables? It was not time for milking as the unknown man had said: my udders did not feel full at all. Paces. He was going away. Snorting, I pushed Cream Pie on Cupcake and got up, yawning softly. Aidan was at the entrance of the barn already. I emitted a low moo, trying not to wake my herd. He stopped and looked behind. I mooed again, quizzically. When he was back again, I noticed that his eyes had an unusual worn-out and worried expression.

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you up." he murmured, lowering his gaze.

I mooed my question again.

"Could not sleep. I feel I have ruined everything. Penelope is obsessed with Fudge now and I pushed you away in the most despicable way. I keep trying to figure out why I did all of this. I knew what would happen, I had to know! Why did I bring all of this on myself?"

I could not answer. I had hoped that his attempt to drive Penelope away had been just a way to force them to acknowledge the end of their marriage, but perhaps I was wrong.

"Go to sleep, Gumdrop, you don't need to pay for my mistakes again by losing your sleep too." he said and headed back out.

All of a sudden I knew how to make everything go back the way it had been. I just had to go forward instead of hoping to go back. I just had to kiss my man and let my love burn inside of me again, instead of using my anger to stifle it.

The gate of our stable could be unlocked from the outside easily. So I broke the rules, I behaved like a person and used my fore-hooves to open it. After I closed it behind me, with my heart racing for the huge violation that I just committed, I chased Aidan. He was ambling towards the guesthouse. Running on my hind legs as fast as they allowed me, I reached him. He had turned around, hearing the noise of my galloping, just in time to catch me in his arms, as I kissed him dearly. When I opened my eyes and detached my lips, I could see relief spreading on his face, like a wave emitted from his mouth. We could not stay separated much longer: he resumed kissing me, pushed me on the table of one of the deserted stands and undid his pants. My desire for him was a ravenous beast and just like one, it dragged him in the depths of its burrow: I trapped him between my hind legs and pulled him towards my hungry pussy. He tried to kiss me, but I guided his mouth to my enormous udders. As he sucked milk from my long nipples, his penis found its entrance in my wet vagina. I watched him enjoying my body with the expression of a man who would have gladly spent the rest of his life that way. Yes, good, because now that he had learned his lesson, he would. I was his cow. I was already on the verge of cumming!

No, not yet! If we were making love, we would have to do it the proper way: I pushed him back, rolled on my stomach and waggled my tail. With a grunt, he took it off in one, painful, move and we was inside my butt, ramming it, all the while his hands had reached my pussy and were mercilessly stimulating my soaking clit. Everything was just how it was supposed to be. As he filled me up with his sperm, I came loudly. He had barely taken out his cock from me, that I was already turning around and stuffing it into my mouth. When I was finished licking and sucking him clean, the hand he had promptly put under my asshole to fetch the rest of his precious milk was smearing it on my awaiting, drooling tongue.

"I love you Gumdrop." he whispered.

I answered by extracting his whip from his boot with my mouth and offering it to him with pleading, eager eyes.

"Damn, I love you so fucking much!" he repeated, rudely hoisting me up and shoving me on the table.

I was ready to receive his punishment for breaking out of my enclosure, displaying my docile and awaiting ass. He whipped me, again and again, all over my hindquarters and the back of my thighs. None of my sobs could stop him, neither my pleading moos, for he was my farmer and he knew better. Only when red welts had decorated my ass, he stopped, allowing me to go back on my hindlegs and kiss him again, thankful and in desperate need of the soothing bliss that only his lips could provide.

We had done it, I felt safe with him again.

"I'll never betray your trust again, I promise." he murmured and I hugged him tighter.

We cuddled a little more, then he went to medicate my sore hindquarters and brought me back to the stables, only to be woken up a couple of hours later by Aaron. Back in the barn for our nap, Cupcake and Cream Pie looked worried at me when they saw the marks of my punishments, but I reassured them that all was fine and we and Aidan were as close as we had ever been. The tale about what had happened while they were asleep convinced Cream Pie, but Cupcake needed to ask me a couple of times more if I was okay. I guessed that my behavior had been strange lately, so I tried to make her understand that I found a strength inside of me that allowed me to explore and enjoy more aspects of being a cow than I had ever thought. She gave me a look that I was not sure how to interpret, but let the matter drop.

The rest of the day was quite uneventful. In the morning Aidan and Penelope discussed the need of buying a new cow for the incoming auction. On one hand there was the newfound popularity of our farm to be taken into account, which could lead to more requests for our asses and our milk, on the other hand, many of the people who now knew it, did not leave close-by and it was hard to imagine them coming very often. Moreover, Aidan, who had not even dreamed of the success he had obtained, had not scouted any of the girls being auctioned that day, so he did not feel sure about going there blind. The discussion was closed by Penelope, with a cryptic statement:

"Look, in any case, we need no auction. I got plenty of raw material myself." she whispered between her teeth.

What did she mean? I cast a glance at the others, but they were too far and had not heard. Looking at Cream Pie, though, I found my answer. Penelope was using her agency to find girls like her, beautiful, in trouble and desperate enough for money to become hucows. Penelope wanted to be a pimp! The most incredible part of any of it was that I was not so sure how to feel about it. Instinctively, I was outraged that she was taking advantage of people in a shitty situation, but then again, Cream Pie would still be in that very same shitty situation had she not become a cow. Who was I to tell her that she had to endure whatever she was running from to preserve something, whatever that was, that I had given up myself for a far from obligated choice? I imagined that it all boiled down to deciding whether being a cow was good or bad for someone. For me it had been more than good and for her too. As long as the girls that Penelope found understood what they were getting into, I was fine.

Later that day, in the afternoon, Fergie came back to bid us farewell and share some pieces of news. She would see us at the next fair, and, apparently, she had convinced her dad to buy her a pony, after all. She wanted one with a red mane, so that she could call her "Red MenAss", a name that I personally found hilarious and that would be tattooed on the pony's lower back along with a little "('s)" between "Men" and "Ass". After that, she went to pet Fudge some more, bringing her sugar and a carrot. We found out that a carrot for ponygirls was actually an orange carrot-shaped vibrator. Penelope was so impressed by her behavior, that she gave her permission to mount Fudge. For a not-so-curious coincidence, Fergie was already packing a strap-on in her trousers and went down hard on our pony under our very curious eyes, leaving her with a lasting good impression of our redheaded friend.

In the evening, after a long day of breeding which left me with an aching asshole, we were ready to pack and go back home. Even though we now knew what the trip would be like, that did not make much less of a traumatic experience. Fortunately for Cream Pie, Aaron had given her his earplugs, with which she managed to sleep a little. He told us that he was sorry that he did not think of it sooner, because otherwise he would have bought some for us too. We did not care much: Cupcake could pretty much sleep wherever and whenever she wanted, while I wanted to be a good cow and do without.

In the couple of months that followed, everything pretty much returned to normal for us cows, apart from the fact that we now grazed outside until dark. However, for Fudge it was a bit harder. Ava had begun teaching dressage to her for her next competition, giving us the chance to improve our knowledge of real horses and, of course, ponygirls. What for a human being was called running, namely moving the legs in opposite directions and swinging the arms in the opposite way with respect to the legs, for a horse and a ponygirl corresponded to a trot. Similarly, the movements of the human limbs during a walk, which required one foot always on the ground, matched those of a horse's or a ponygirl's walk.

However, horses had other gaits too, and so Fudge had to learn to perform them. Pace was simple enough: it was like trotting, but this time the hind and the forelegs were synchronized, so that if, say, the left hind leg was pushing, the left foreleg was swinging backwards, while the right hind and forelegs would be going upwards. This, for a ponygirl was unnatural, as she had only her hind legs on the ground and it threw her out of balance, putting some strain on the knees that was luckily compensated by her special protections. So, all in all, for some dressage exhibition, she could manage quite easily.

Cantering and galloping were a whole new story, though. They required a coordination for the separate movements of the four limbs not unlike that of a drummer and, at the same time, the upright position of a ponygirl made it really hard to keep her balance. The strain for the new training was so hard that, for almost three weeks, Fudge had to be confined on her own enclosure, because, according to Ava, she needed some more breaking. In those days, Penelope taking her for a ride in the country whenever it was sunny was the only thing that seemed to cheer her up. She would always come back with a badly sore ass and a dreamy smile on her face.

Next, she learned hurdles in a special track that now went around our outside corral. These were made with frail beams made of polystyrene that were only placed on their supports, without being fixed to them in any way. This solution saved the pony from falling in case she did not jump correctly, as she would just knock them over and possibly break them without getting much of an impact. Fortunately for Fudge, she had already been quite proficient with this kind of exercises before becoming a pony, so it did not take much for her to adapt.

While Ava seemed to be solely focused on her work, Aaron and Kam started to struggle. The latter was clearly madly in love with his girlfriend and had begun to be sloppy and very late for work. It was almost as if, now that he did not have sex with us anymore, he did not care much about his job. Aaron, on the other hand, was incapable of maintaining the basic discipline rules with our herd: he barely whipped us, he kept giving us treats for no reason and he let us gesture with him. He seemed to have forgotten how important it was to have strict rules for us or, as Ava put it, that we were cows.

Indeed, one day we overheard them argue in the outdoor enclosure, just behind a big haystack. Since it had just stopped raining, they were probably thinking that we were still inside, not taking into account that Cupcake loved rain and had somehow convinced us to have a stroll outside under the pour.

"Look Aaron, we need to talk." said Ava, apparently uneasy.

"About?" he asked in the carefree tone that characterized him lately.

"I know that you have a crush on Cream Pie." she revealed.

Cream Pie almost gave us away, gasping. Cupcake muted her with her foreleg just in time.

"What? I..." he began to babble.

"I am not Kam, I look at the monitors in the breeding rooms even if they are supposed to be empty."

"Are you going to snitch?" he replied, trying to sound threatening.

"I've known for a while now, if I wanted to tell Aidan, I would've, don't you think?" she retorted, a little offended.

"So?"

"So I'm talking to you to prevent you from making a big mistake." she said, shyly.

"Look, he's not going to find out..."

"I'm not talking about that. The mistake is thinking that you and her are in love."

"What? Who are you to say that we aren't?" he cried, extremely offended.

"Aaron, come on, she's a cow!" she insisted.

"So what, she's not human? What's wrong with you lot? You've all drunk Aidan's kool-aid?" squeaked the man, appalled.

"Jeez, Aaron, I was a ponygirl, remember?" replied annoyed Ava "Of course I know that she's a human being! The point is: what is she to us? What's our interface with her? In that sense, she's effectively an animal: she cannot talk, she does what we tell her to do and needs us to take care of all her needs, even the most basic ones."

"So what? It's a game, a fantasy!"

"Aaron, how can you know that you love her if you've never talked to her? You don't know anything about what she thinks, how she sees the world, what she likes about it! You don't know her!"

"I talk to her all the time! She mimes and I understand, so fuck you, I know my girlfriend! I mean, what about deaf-mute people, then? Are they animals to you too? What the fuck are you talking about?" retorted Aaron, growing disconcerted and hurt.

"Of course they aren't! But they still have a language, and, most importantly, they are free. They can do things out there, that allow others to know them. A person is defined by their actions and their words, you must agree with this!" said Ava, impatiently "What I'm saying is that all of those things about Cream Pie are hidden from you. You can only see a tiny speck of who she is, in the current situation, so no, you don't know her at all!"

Aaron seemed to struggle to find a counterpoint, but then came out with:

"I know what my heart tells me. I love her! I just do!"

"You love the idea you have of her. You are the one stuck in a fantasy, not me, not Aidan." she concluded bitterly before taking her leave.

When she saw us, she just muttered "Shit!" between her teeth.

Cream Pie began to cry, uncovering our presence to Aaron too. He rushed to console her and we gave them privacy. Cupcake did not seem to feel much better than her and, to be honest, I was neither. I and Aidan had been in love with each other before my transformation, so Ava's argument did not apply to us, right? Then why was I feeling so shitty? Well, for one, because the most meaningful connections I had had with people after the disaster, aside from Aidan, had been made as a cow. Cupcake, Cream Pie and now Fudge were my friends, but according to Ava, they were what? Emotional support, not unlike a plush for a child? Was I so desperate? Just when the clouds had stopped pouring their tears on us and the sun shone again, I started to cry softly.

My first instinct was to look for Cupcake's help, but her eyes were watering too. So we just sobbed in each other arms. I do not know for how long our sudden realization of the depth of our desperation and solitude dwelt our minds. I just know that Cream Pie joined us at a certain point, sorrowful too, telling us that she had broken up with Aaron, because she wanted him to be happy and in love for real. She felt terribly guilty for having unknowingly deceived him like that. We would have tried to console her, but all of a sudden Aaron's yells reached our ears and then Fudge whinnied harder than I had ever heard her do. What was happening? We ran to the barn and found Ava trying to calm down Fudge, now out of her enclosure where she was supposed to rest. The pony, hugged by the woman, was waving her fore-hooves threateningly, her face now filled with fury. Aaron, instead, was on the ground, clutching his bleeding nose and mouth, with a pained expression.

"Calm down, girl." Ava was whispering to Fudge, while stroking her mane and pulling down the reins to force her to put her face on Ava's chest "I can fend for myself, don't worry."

Cream Pie, in the meantime, mooed in worry and tried to leap over the fence, to run in aid of her lover. I and Cupcake did not know whether to help her or not: did we really want a brawl between a cow and a horse? Fortunately for us, Aaron got up as soon as he saw her.

"Don't worry, baby, I'm fine, just a couple of punches. I lost my temper with Ava and frightened Fudge."

Cream Pie did not seem to care about what had happened, she just wanted to check his face. Aaron smiled, revealing his bloody teeth behind the blue lips.

"So much for going each in our separate way, huh?"

Despite her worry, Cream Pie burst into a wry laugh.

"Look, don't be angry with your friend, alright? I, for one, I'm grateful for this beating: it made you run back to me!"

Cream Pie smiled again and looked at Fudge, whose face had now disappeared in Ava's chest, while the horse breaker kissed her head and thanked her for her bravery. She mooed her forgiveness, but not very convincingly.

"Look, can we please not rush things? Let's not give up on us just yet, alright? Let's think about what Ava said and prove her wrong!"

Cream Pie stared back at him, right in the eye. There was not much hope in her gaze.

"I'm not giving up on you! Please don't give up on me!" he pleaded and she finally mooed yes. They cuddled together on the hay for some time, but then we had to be milked, fed and bred. The clock of the farm would stop for no one and nothing.

It was only at night that we had a chance to find out what had happened. Cream Pie had asked Aaron for a pause, so that she had time to elaborate on her feelings and Ava's words. She chose to do it with our help and we were glad to discuss it, because we were confused too.

Cupcake had regained her confidence, apparently. She argued that she knew us, because we did talk and act, in a very peculiar environment, sure, but we took care of each other and that was enough for her to say that we were her friends. Cream Pie then replied that she agreed and she was not disputing the fact that she knew and was in love with Aaron, but how could he really have an inkling of who she was? We cows knew her, because she had proven herself to us, had let out her personality through her words and actions, but with him she had not had many chances. They just spent time cooped up in some breeding room, barely able to exchange a few words.

So I asked why anything happened at all, why he did not fall in love with me or Cupcake. Cream Pie shrugged and hypothesized that she had seemed to him a frail straw, something to protect and his sensitive personality had taken over, giving him the savior complex, which she mimed by resting her head in an aureole made of hay. Tears appeared again on my face, proving once more that all of this was about Cupcake, for me.