Harry Styles - Instant Attraction Ch. 12

A cold dread filled him, and he briskly told himself not to panic. It didn't mean anything. She was probably waiting to see him. He nodded to himself and typed another quick text to her.

HS: I'm on my way to the airport, finally! It's been such a long two weeks without you, baby. H x

A torturous twenty minutes passed with no reply.

HS: Text me when you're free, I want to see you x

Another twenty minutes passed, and they were nearly at the airport now. Finally, Harry called her, but it went straight to voicemail. He hung up, not leaving a message, mind whirling with a jerky kind of panic. He sent a third text as he boarded the plane to LA, feeling sick.

HS: If you listened to the song, then you know how I feel. If you still want to be with me, please meet me at LAX.

Here, he paused, hands shaking, then finished the message.

But if you don't, and that's why you're not answering your phone or replying, I guess I'll have my answer.

He added in his gate number and landing time then shut his phone off for take off. All the happiness he'd been feeling stripped from him, Harry looked back at his pale and drawn reflection in the plane's window as they rolled down the runway. Please be there, Charley, he thought as they soared into the air.


***

Day 13 -- Saturday: Charley in Los Angeles

On Saturday morning, two days before Harry was due home, Charley went for a final, goodbye run in the park near her apartment. A week had passed since the dreadful headline, and the time, along with the excitement of moving into her new house today, helped to clear her thoughts and maybe see that the situation with Harry wasn't as bad as it had initially seemed.

Being in love was tougher than she'd thought, Charley mused as she ran. She hoped it didn't mean she would overreact at absolutely everything, and was very glad that she had been unable to contact Harry after all -- her thoughts had calmed a lot in the last few days.

If he contacts me when he gets home and wants to see me, I'll talk to him about all of this, Charley made a pact with herself. It was only fair to both of them, especially Harry, to talk about her fears before they took a serious step in their relationship -- and before he went on tour. Charley tried not to think about the possibility that maybe seeing Kendall Jenner meant he'd changed his mind about being with her while in Seattle. There was a niggling insecurity that she hated, that maybe being away from her and seeing how different she was from his stunning ex-lover could make him realise she wasn't--

"Charley!"

Charley jumped out of her skin as a man with glasses and something black in his hand appeared in front of her on the path, jerking her out of her thoughts, and she stopped hurriedly to avoid hitting him. Jesus!

The middle-aged man thrust what she recognised as a voice recorder into her face. "What do you think of Harry being in Seattle with Stevie and Kendall? Are you okay with him seeing Kendall again? Did you even know?"

Charley blinked, completely unprepared for this in her current mental state. Journalists had stopped bugging her a while ago, only getting the same shots over and over. This was, though, the first run she'd gone on since the Kendall Jenner headline -- of course there would be a fresh attack from the media.

"Um, no comment," she finally muttered and side-stepped him, jogging away, but he followed her. Hearing him say those things were only fuelling her own insecurities.

"Are the two of you still together? Or no? Did he cheat on you? We haven't had a photo of you two together since London. Have things cooled off?" The journalist started huffing pretty quickly as he shouted the barrage of questions after her. He was clearly unfit, so Charley started to sprint away, not answering him as her mind whirled. Leaving him behind to bend forward on his knees to catch his breath, she dashed back home and into her apartment lobby.

Breathing rapidly, and not from the run, Charley held a hand to her forehead as she thought about the implications of what the reporter had said. Stevie and Kendall? There was another woman? It was just another blow.

And just like that, she was done. Feeling exhausted, with no more tears to spare, Charley walked like a robot back upstairs to shower. Her heart just couldn't take any more.

Charley threw herself into packing all of the boxes she'd purpose-bought for the move. She didn't have too many things, but there was still plenty of boxes and furniture to move. A knock at her door revealed a group of three men from the moving company she'd hired. They were very efficient, and by late afternoon, her apartment was completely empty. It looked so bare.

"Charley! I'm going to miss you." A voice came sadly from the open doorway, disturbing Charley from taking in the empty space she'd called home for so long.

"Oh Marnie, I may be leaving this apartment, but you better come visit me!" Charley smiled at her neighbour and drew her in for a hug. "You've been the best neighbour a girl could ask for."

Marnie grinned. "Back at you. And of course I'm going to come visit. I have to come babysit your new cat."

Charley rolled her eyes. Her and Marnie had been chatting about how a dog would be too difficult to leave when she travelled. Marnie adored cats and had decided one would be a perfect companion for Charley. "I'm not a crazy cat lady just yet," she said with a grin. "But when I am one, you can babysit for me, I promise."

"Oh, but you are already a crazy cat lady," Marnie said mischievously and disappeared back into her apartment across the hall.

Puzzled, Charley waited, then brought both hands to her mouth in shock as Marnie re-emerged carrying the tiniest, fluffiest, cutest grey kitten she had ever seen.

"Marnie!" she gasped, immediately holding her hands out for the ball of fluff.

"Happy house warming," Marnie grinned as she passed the kitten to Charley.

Charley stared at it.

"It's a boy," Marnie continued smugly, folding her arms across her chest. "I got him from the shelter, so you're basically rescuing him."

Charley looked from the kitten to Marnie wordlessly, her mouth open and closing. The kitten started to purr and lick her finger.

"I'm a crazy cat lady," she finally whispered, starting to laugh. "I can't believe you got me a kitten!"

Marnie started to laugh with her and threw an arm around Charley's shoulders as they gazed at the little fluff ball.

"Does he have a name already?" Charley asked.

"Nope, that's the fun part of getting a kitten. You get to choose."

Charley scrunched her nose up as she held the sweet thing up to her face. It batted playfully at her nose and she smiled a little sadly at it. "I have the perfect one."

***

Day 15 -- Monday, LAX airport

Harry's heart sunk. She wasn't waiting for him. He'd looked everywhere, collected his bags, been photographed while he hesitated hoping he'd just missed her, then finally had gotten into a cab.

All the hope he'd had of Charley throwing herself into his arms, saying that she loved him back was finally snuffed out. He pushed her too hard. The song was too much, too soon. He'd put everything on the line, his heart out on the line. And instead of bringing them closer, it had pulled them apart.

The cab pulled up outside his house and he paid his fare, tipping the driver, then robotically entered his house and looked around. It seemed so quiet. Charley had infused his home recently with a warmth and sense of fun. Without her, it was just another house again.

***

Day 21 -- Sunday, Los Angeles


"Up! Up! This ridiculous. No more moping," Maria's brusque voice cut through the dark bedroom, and suddenly bright sunlight was blinding him.

"No," Harry moaned, pulling the covers over his head. "Go 'way."

The covers were ripped off him and Harry was startled into a sitting position. He was only wearing boxer briefs.

"Hey! Maria!" he scowled and tried to grab the duvet back off her.

"No! I need to wash," she said, proceeding to try and rip the sheet underneath him off the bed, too. Startling a laugh from his lips, Harry dove off the bed as she yanked at it hard. Immediately, his mouth turned down again. There hadn't been much to laugh about this last week since being home.

"Go shower. You stink," Maria said loftily as she left with the large bunch of sheets in her arms. Harry watched her in disbelief, blinking, unused to the light streaming into the room. He'd locked himself into his room most of the time since being home, only heading downstairs to eat when he was desperately hungry, taking it back upstairs.

Reluctantly, looking at his bare mattress, Harry decided to take a shower like Maria had suggested, worried the old woman would rip his underpants off next and thrust him into the shower herself. He wasn't sure if she would, but he wasn't taking any changes.

He locked the bathroom door behind him, just in case. He felt like hell. Charley hadn't responded to any of his texts, and subsequent phone calls had told him her number wasn't even in service any more. She'd actually changed her phone number. That's what had completely and utterly broken his heart.

While he stood under the stream of scalding water, Harry wondered for the millionth time what had gone wrong while he'd been away -- if it was the song that had changed her mind, or something else. Either way, she clearly wanted nothing to do with him. To change her phone number...Harry flinched away from the thought. Nothing had hurt him so much as when he'd realised what she'd done. Because if she had wanted him to have her new number, she would have contacted him. He sunk miserably onto the tiled floor of the shower and let the water rush over him.

***

Day 28 -- Saturday, Los Angeles

Harry waited tensely as the ring tone in his ear repeated endlessly before going to voicemail. Caroline wasn't answering. He wanted to throw the damn phone across the room, but he tried again with the same result.

About three days ago, Harry's misery had changed into anger. Fury, really. How could Charley just decide like that without talking to him, to cut him out of her life? After all they'd shared together! It was downright disrespectful. This morning, he woke up with a brand new resolve. He was going to force Charley to talk to him and tell him what had happened. He couldn't leave it like this, he deserved better than this. I basically told her I loved her, for crying out loud! he thought angrily. That song had put him in an incredibly vulnerable position, and for her to just--

He swore as Caroline's answerphone picked up for the fifth time. Obviously flooding her phone with calls wasn't getting any results. Harry thought hard, then started dialling Zayn.

"Fucking pick up, Zayn!" Harry yelled into the phone as it, too, went to voicemail. "Fucking whipped little git," he muttered as he hit redial.

He kept punching redial to Zayn, losing all home as he listened over and over to the dial tone, until suddenly Zayn picked up.

"Harry, give it up! She doesn't want to talk to you!" Zayn's voice blasted him.

Harry almost lost his chance, so startled by the abrupt pick up that he was momentarily breathless, then--

"Zayn! Who doesn't want to talk to me? Caroline or Charley?" he asked breathlessly.

"Both, you idiot! Can't you tell? And stop harassing Caroline -- she's going mental upstairs. She'll be furious if she finds out I've answered," Zayn hissed angrily.

"Why is Caroline furious you're talking to me?" Harry asked, bewildered, ignoring Zayn's other comments. That didn't make sense at all.

"Because of what you did in Seattle," Zayn said slowly, like he was spelling something out to a five year old.

What? Harry felt all the wind blow out of his sails, now feeling utterly lost. What did I do in Seattle?

But Zayn wasn't finished. "Oh! And, obviously, for ignoring Charley, for what, two weeks now? We all know you're back in LA, mate."

"Wait-- what?" Harry couldn't get his brain to work.

Zayn made a condescending tone. "Don't play dumb. You shack up with Kendall Jenner, then not even have the decency to call Charley and tell her it's over? And now you start calling Caroline? What's wrong with you, mate?"


Harry felt the bewilderment change to anger again. "What the fuck? I didn't shack up with Kendall Jenner -- we had, we had...dinner..." he trailed off, the heat in his words dying again.

Zayn was silent.

"Wait...were we photographed?"

Zayn still stayed silent. Harry checked to make sure he hadn't been hung up on, but the timer was still ticking over.

"Zayn. What did the media say? Does Charley think I cheated on her? Zayn, I didn't. I didn't!" Suddenly, his heart was pounding, some kind of mad sense was finally being made out of the last two weeks of his misery.

Zayn finally scoffed loudly. "We all know photos can be misleading, mate, but why didn't you call her when you got home? Apparently Charley's been walking around like a robot, completely heartbroken over a dickhead like you, and my missus has been ranting at me about you every single day! I am sick to death of hearing your bloody name, man!"

Harry rocked back on his heels, thinking fast. "Get Caroline on the phone. To talk. I have to explain. It's not at all what she thinks."

His mind was racing as he listened to Zayn's groan. I'm an idiot, I should have gone online, done some research, called Zayn right away.

"Please, Zayn. If you were ever my friend, I need you to do this for me. I -- I love her," Harry stumbled at the end, the words sounding strange, but so right, out loud.

Zayn hesitated. "You love her?" he asked in obvious surprise.

"Yes, damnit, now can you please tell Caroline I need to talk to her." Harry ran a desperate hand through his hair, frowning at this insane turn of events. His heart pounded. There was a chance this could still be saved.

"I'll have to call you back," Zayn mumbled, and the dial tone sounded in his ear.

Harry paced around his living room while he waited for Zayn's call. Finally, fifteen minutes later, it rang. Harry snatched the phone up.

"Caroline?"

"I'm listening," she said curtly.

And he began to explain.

***

Harry nervously walked into the library. He wasn't sure why Charley wanted to meet here. Maybe because it was so quiet, maybe because it was neutral ground. He'd looked up the images and headlines from Seattle on Google, cursing at the article and the way the photos looked. It definitely looked like he was kissing Kendall on the mouth, and whilst he had left at the same time as her, he had headed to his hotel room with Mitch, not to Kendall's.

Heart pounding, he made his way to the stacks in the back where he'd been told to go by Caroline. He hadn't been given Charley's new number, and he was walking blind right now. And then he saw her and his heart stopped. Her back was to him, seated at a small desk, her phone and keys on the desk in front of her. He took a moment to drink in her long, dark hair swept up into a ponytail, the plain, grey sweats and black t-shirt.

He slowly walked around to sit in the chair opposite her, startling her a little, her eyes jumping to his face, then darting away nervously. Quietly, he drank in her features, realising he hadn't seen her for nearly a month now. His heart clenched savagely as he noted how sadness and exhaustion were written across her face. Despite that, she'd never looked more beautiful to him.

"Hey," he murmured softly and carefully reached his hands out to hers across the table. He was unprepared for how she reflexively jerked away from him, hugging her arms around her body, and leaning back in her seat. Harry's heart sank, but he fought the panic back. He was going to explain. She was here, after all.


"Hi," she replied, looking down at the desk between them. "Caroline said you wanted to talk. So talk."

Harry stared at her, not knowing where to start. "I didn't sleep with Kendall," he blurted, then cringed. That wasn't at all what he'd wanted to say. He watched Charley inspect her fingernails.

"I know," she said softly.

"I was at a last-minute meeting, set up by Jeff--" Harry started rushing on, then paused, startled. What? "Wait, you know?" Confusion coloured his tone.

"After thinking about it for a while, I realised that you woudn't cheat on me, that's not something you would do," Charley clarified, still looking down.

"Well...good," he said lamely. So what was the problem then? He stayed quiet for a moment, hoping she'd continue, but she didn't.

"Caroline said you didn't get my texts," he said softly, pulling out his phone, tapping open the message thread to her and putting it down in front of her.

Her eyes barely flicked to it, not reading the texts.

"Charley, I sent those texts the second I got back into cell phone reception on my way to the airport. I asked...I asked if you still wanted to be with me after listening to the song, if you could meet me at the airport..." he trailed off, realising how stupid he sounded.

That sparked a response out of her. She finally looked up to meet him, surprise in her hazel eyes. His breath caught at the sight. She was so beautiful, especially without a stitch of makeup on, like now.

"You did?" she asked, confused.

"Yes," he pressed on, feeling more hopeful. She was listening. "It was a stupid thing for me to do, I didn't know you'd broken your phone, so when I never heard from you..." Caroline had explained how Charley had had to replace it. She hadn't said how it had broken, but he kind of guessed. "I tried to call you, and it said your number wasn't in service. I assumed that was for a reason. I gave up. I shouldn't have. Baby, I'm so sorry--"

"Don't, Harry," Charley interrupted. "Don't apologise. It's not your fault. I'm sorry. I panicked at the headlines and read more into them than I should have. It's ironic. That usually I don't, but the second I do, I read the worst headline I could read." Her tone was distant and withdrawn, the smile twisting her mouth completely without humour.

Harry felt his heart sinking again. She believed him, she was apologising to him. Then why did this still feel all wrong?

"So...so are we okay?" he asked tentatively, staring intently at her.

Harry watched Charley blow out a breath, looking back down at the desk.

"All of this has taught me something, Harry. Being away from you, seeing the damned photos, not being able to contact you," she paused, then gritted her teeth in determination. "I learned something about myself."

Harry closed his eyes as he felt the inevitable downward spiral his heart had started taking two weeks ago, begin to complete its final, gut-wrenching circuit.

"I can't do it. I can't be with you. You're going off soon to promote your tour -- and then you're going away for a whole year," Charley said quietly. "It's too much."

"We can work it out," Harry burst out desperately, reaching his hands across the table towards her, inches from her crossed arms. "Come with me! Charley--"

She leaned away abruptly, eyes shining with unmistakable tears.

He paused, playing his heart's last card. "Charley..." he whispered brokenly as she stayed looking determinedly away from him. "I've missed you every second of every day we've been apart. I-- I love you." Harry stared at her as she slowly began to shake her head, and everything started to crash down around him.