He is Your Master Now Pt. 13

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The Sweetest of all Sweet Pain.
6.8k words
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Part 13 of the 15 part series

Updated 03/25/2024
Created 05/10/2020
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Believing that his first solo outing as a woman was a success, Ambrose' is dismayed when Pippi feels otherwise. She reminds him that the world is a dangerous place for people like him. In spite of Pippi's encouragement Ambrose is paranoid that his plans to give himself to Manuel will be thwarted and leads Pippi to believe that he's going to douse Manuel's hopes. Manuel's heart sinks when told that Ambrose wants to have a serious talk with him, but he's in for a pleasant surprise.

He is Your Master Now Pt. 13 The Sweetest of all Sweet Pain.

Back from brunch, Ambrose ran into Pippi and told her everything that happened, except for his decision to surrender his cherry ass to Manuel. Pippi did not share his excitement admonished him and gave him strong words of caution because of the incident in the restaurant.

As for his decision to seek out the auto repair guy, "I'm glad you got cold feet because you can't do shit like that, Ambrose Sweet. Transwomen are victimized at higher rates than cis women."

He thought she'd be impressed with how he handled things and had not remotely considered that she might rebuke him. For the first time since Ambrose arrived at Carcosa, he expressed genuine anger untinged by fear. Since that time, though, his subjugation had made him more docile; even in his anger, he no longer resembled the unpleasant man he used to be.

"But you said I'm not trans. You were really adamant about it. You even seemed a little angry."

"You're deliberately misconstruing what I'm trying to tell you. And since you apparently haven't learned this life lesson, you should know that bigots and racists, not matter who they hate, don't give a fuck about such distinctions. So they're not going to give a fuck that you're not actually trans.

They wouldn't know the difference anyway and it might be worse that you still identify as a man, but decided to be a sissy. And let me tell you, you, may look remarkably good all dolled up; close to looking like a woman than just about any man could, but you haven't been taking hormones, so there will be people who will pick up on that. They might be polite enough not to test their suspicions, but some might.

"There are some men, not all, but enough, who knowing what you are, will be attracted to you, they'll want to fuck you, they might even get to, if you let them, but they will hate themselves for having those feelings and guess who'll they'll beat on? Here's a hint: it won't be themselves. I thought I had already instilled this in you."

Realizing that she was being too harsh, she softened some and hugged him.

"I care about you honey. I don't show it, but I kind of almost see you like a kid sister. But you have to realize that everything you went through here in Carcosa, no matter how terrifying, was under control, you're not going to have that outside and I don't want to see you really get hurt." She held him at arm's length and looked at him soberly. "I've been to a few funerals; I don't want to go to anymore. But the most heartbreaking one was a closed casket funeral. I never want to go to another one of those again."

Ambrose took her words to heart.

They spent most of the day going over every detail of his short solo outing. Pippi had an ability to pick apart nearly every aspect of his day with great insight. She impressed upon him the fact that unlike transwomen, he hadn't had several years in which to develop a healthy sense of self-preservation.

Ambrose had to stifle the urge to pout and largely succeeded. "But you said that you made up this adjustment period because your students were always too shy and meek."

"OK, I can see that by telling you that, maybe it made you too bold for your own good. Hopefully, I got through to you today and you'll be more careful when you're out there."

When there was no more left to say on the matter, they had an early dinner.

"So," Pippi ventured in all seriousness, "you have to make a decision about Manuel. Like, this week. The sooner the better."

Ambrose stared at his food for a good long while.

"Will he be here tomorrow?"

It turned out he would.

"When he's done for the day, can you tell him that I need to have a very serious talk with him?"

He gave no clue as to what he was ultimately planning but Pippi inferred from his serious expression that he was going to let Manuel down. Another clue was that he asked to speak to Manuel at the end of the day. She assumed that he didn't want the bad news affecting Manuel's work at Carcosa so early in the day as that might piss off Cassilda.

"Do you want me to be there?"

"He might think I don't trust him to be a gentleman. We both know he will. And I won't always have you around when I have to do this." Ambrose was careful to select words that would work whether he chose to be with Manuel or reject him. His mannerism that conveyed the latter scenario.

"You can use the intimate dining room."

"I think I want to talk to him in my apartment."

"I don't think that's wise; he might get the idea that you're playing with him."

"He'll know I'm not."

"Is it because you'll feel more at home there. I mean, you just got that apartment. You only spent one morning in it and not even for most of it. You can't already feel that secure about it as a safe space."

"It's Manuel, I don't need a safe space, I'll be safe. I have absolutely no doubt about that. I need a--- kind of--- a sense of someplace where I'll feel more assertive because it's my 'territory', if that helps. It doesn't matter how new it is to me. It's such a change from my small room, which we both know was nothing but a dressed-up jail cell. That's what it felt like to live in that tiny room."

"OK, I understand," Pippi said. It was the contrast to his old room that sold her on his reasoning.

Ambrose decided to test the bounds of his new freedom. "Is it OK if no one needs me tomorrow? Can I take the day off?" Putting it that way sounded strange to him, but he couldn't think of another way to put it.

Pippi reasoned that Ambrose would be sweating what to say to Manuel and was probably also dreading running into him afterwards.

"You can do whatever you want sweety. One of the perks of your new freedom is that going forward, they'll always try to give you advanced notice if they need you for something."

Ambrose barely heard her. Once he knew he was in the clear, the vision he had where he and Manuel were passionately fucking, came to mind.

"I'm going to go to my place now. Unless you need me for something." He tried his best to look troubled.

"Of course, honey. I know what you're going through."

"Can someone call me when Manuel's on his way up? What time will that be anyway."

"He gets off at seven. I'll call you myself."

"Thanks Pippi."

They mutually pecked each other on the cheek and Ambrose went to his apartment.

He was aware of the certainty that Cassilda probably knew what he was planning, but he was still certain that he needed to pretend he was going to refuse Manuel to make his vision come true. He knew it was a silly superstition but clung to it anyway.

All the way to his suite and then all night until he slept, Ambrose' mind was consumed by the next night's coming event. It was a struggle not to masturbate but he wanted to cum hard when he took care of himself while Manuel was fucking him. That would be one time where premature ejaculation would be a good thing, not that he had that problem.

He had no dreams that night, but when he woke up the next morning, the prospect of taking Manuel's cock up his ass was practically all he could think about. If his past vision was to be believed, they would fuck in the missionary position where they could look each other in the eye, and it would be passionate.

He worried over what lingerie to wear; he had many new items to choose from and spent hours trying many of them on. Then he remembered he was naked in his vision and decided he mustn't deviate from it. He did not regret the hours he spent trying on items because it kept him from dwelling on what was to come. He also looked fabulous in all of them and that was a confidence booster.

Since visions don't convey smells, he did decide it was safe to wear perfume and choice easy: Evening Lady. The name was very suggestive; easily calling to mind: "ladies of the evening'. Obviously, Manuel wouldn't know what perfume he was wearing, but the scent would work some magic on him; it was quite exhilarating.

The kitchen had been stocked to his taste and he made himself a small meal at about two pm. This would be the last meal before his deflowering as it would give him plenty of time to shit everything out.

As the early evening drew close, Ambrose administered two enemas and showered thoroughly; scrubbing himself just shy of the point where his skin could become splotchy and red. This particular shower had a special symbolic meaning to it: He was cleansing himself of the last vestiges of masculinity. Between that shower and the next, he'd have been another man's bitch.

At around six thirty, Ambrose prepared himself for the coming event by searching for sissy porn, specifically porn where white femboys sucked on juicy, monstrous black cocks before taking it up the ass.

Although Ambrose genuinely found the prospect of being abused and treated roughly by men very arousing, that wasn't the case when it came to Manuel. Unfortunately, nearly all the interracial sissy porn was very aggressive in nature and littered with racial epithets going both ways.

He eventually found a black performer who didn't engage in race play and sought out his other videos. The man wasn't overly passionate; if anything, he was slightly playful and of good humor, and he referred to all of his partners in female pronouns. In fact, there was no difference in how he approached his partners than he might approach cis women. Ambrose had to stop watching when he began oozing pre-cum and went to the living room with his phone to wait.

Scarcely five minutes had gone by when his phone rang. It was Pippi. Manuel was on his way.

Manuel was hoping that Pippi was wrong about what was about to happen, but when Ambrose meekly opened the door just wide enough to poke his head out, he just knew that Pippi had told him the truth.

Manuel was actually glad he was not invited in; it would make his retreat easier after Ambrose closed the door. Being the gentleman that he was, he spoke first, "Look. I understand. I get it. I really get it and it's fine--- not really though. But you won't have to worry." The hurt and disappointment could be heard in his voice. "I'll just be polite from now on and really, you don't have to be scared of me. I could never hurt you no matter what."

"I know you won't hurt me, you're very gentile, I admire you for that. But I'm afraid anyway."

"Afraid of what?"

The locked eyes for too long.

"What is it Ambrose? Please. I need to leave. I can't stay here and look at you without--- feeling--- awful."

Ambrose opened the door and invited Manuel in.

The big man gave no significance to Ambrose' nudity, he had seen him naked enough times to impart no meaning to it. Instead of enticing him, it pained him, and he refused to come in.

Ambrose grabbed one of his hands. He was too nervous to look Manuel in the eye at that point.

"Ambrose, please. You're making things worse."

Ambrose lifted Manuel's large hand to his own face gave it a small, sensual kiss and placed it on his cheek. His eyes told Manuel all he needed to know.

"Ambrose---" he breathed in surprise.

"'Miss Amanda', tonight, I'm 'Miss Amanda', and always use 'Miss'."

"Miss Amanda." He began breathing loudly at a quicker pace.

He removed Manuel's large hand from his small face, held onto it and led him to the bedroom.

Ambrose awkwardly positioned Manuel and sat him at the edge of the bed. When he went to drop to his knees to unbuckle his belt, Manuel stopped the smaller man, sat him across his knees, with his ass on his crotch, and gave him a long, slow, passionate kiss, which Ambrose returned. His head swooned with lust when he felt the larger man getting aroused. When they stopped, Manuel held his chin, looked him in the eyes and kissed him again.

He stood Ambrose up, brought him close and leaned his head into his chest. He began planting gentle kisses on Ambrose chest, his tiny but cute baby fat breasts and his nipples, all while softly caressing his ass.

A brief moment later, Ambrose pressed a nipple further against Manuel's mouth. He had never had his "titties" licked and sucked and while he did not exactly like the physical sensation, at least initially, he didn't hate it either. Psychologically, however, the dual action of oral stimulation of his tiny breasts and the fondling of his ass made him feel wondrously feminine. Ultimately, he came to enjoy the physical sensation as well.

After a while, Ambrose disengaged and gestured Manuel to stand. He began helping the big man take off his clothes with all the excitement of unwrapping a gift.

When it came time for the "big reveal", Manuel didn't make a big deal out of his size; he didn't spring it on Ambrose as a surprise, although he certainly would have been justified exhibiting such conceit. No one could ever match the Masked Man in endowment, but even so, Manuel's cock impressed him.

Instinctively, Ambrose rested a delicate hand on Manuel's erection and gave a gentle rub with slow back and forth motions. It was rigid, hot and thick. He looked up to see if Manuel approved and stood on his toes to meet the taller man's kiss. When Ambrose began to drop to his knees, Manuel unexpectedly swooped him up instead.

Damn, he was powerful, thought Ambrose, remembering the ballet lesson. There was hardly any effort involved and he felt no strain from the big man while he was held aloft. He marveled at how his soft and white skin contrasted Manuel's dark, well defined muscles.

He leaned his face toward Ambrose and kissed again.

"You're a kisser."

"Is that OK?" Manuel asked.

"It makes me feel beautiful."

"You are beautiful. It's why I can't keep from kissing you."

He laid Ambrose down on the bed and climbed on himself.

WOW! I can't believe it's about to happen and I'm not even scared, thought Ambrose. He was so excited that he forgot to retrieve the lubrication he placed in the nightstand.

Then he got the shock of his life when Manuel started to run his tongue all over his tiny cock and balls. It was so completely unexpected that even while he was being pleasured, he had to reexamine his notions of masculinity and sexuality.

There was no doubt Manuel was a real man. And there was no doubt Ambrose was now a sissy bitch, and if any other man tried to go down on him softly, he probably wouldn't like it. He would see it as too differential. But it didn't seem that way with Manuel. Ambrose soon realized why. Manuel was exercising his right to be reciprocal as only a secure man could.

They both knew that Manuel could beat the shit out of him if he was so inclined. Ambrose wouldn't even be able to put up a fight. It was even possible that Manuel could kill him with a single, well placed punch. But Manuel would never do that because he was sated by his own sense of strength and masculinity.

Ambrose broke away from his quick reverie. Manuel was an excellent cock sucker--- no, actually he wasn't. Ambrose realized that Manuel was not sucking him off, he was going down on Ambrose as one would go down on a woman. He licked Ambrose tiny penis and balls and alternated how he went about it.

I'm really no different than a woman to him, Ambrose realized. Once he understood that, he understood why he was turned on by Manuel being so gentle and considerate. I'm his bitch. He probably doesn't see it that way, but that's how I feel.

Manuel moved up to make out with Ambrose while delicately rubbing his little cock. He never grabbed it, he just stroked it with his fingers.

Perhaps it was the novelty of having sex with a man for the first time, but Ambrose felt that he was close to climaxing. He abruptly pulled away and positioned himself between Manuel's legs and softly grasped Manuel's cock with both hands and kissed it gently. He could feel an ever so slight jolt roll through the big man.

I just have to put it in my mouth, he reasoned, and once I do, it won't matter that he's black and that I'm white, or that he's strong and hard and I'm weak and soft, that he's tall and I'm small, that he has a huge cock and I have a laughably small one. It doesn't matter that he's really something and I'm nothing but a silly infatuated femboy who's feeling lucky and blessed to have this god treat me so kindly and considerately while driving me crazy with desire. He's probably deflowered dozens of sissies and when he's done with me, I'll just be another notch on his cock and I'm OK with that.

The blood began rushing through his head like white noise. With every beat of his heart, it kept rising as if threatening to drown out his thoughts. The noise stopped when he closed his lips around Manuel's big cock head leaving only the insistent throb of his own pounding heart.

They moaned in unison.

He stuck as much of Manuel's cock as he could in his mouth and felt its strong pulse, alternating with his own. He soon lost track of which was which.

Ambrose luxuriated in the scent and taste of natural oils built up from the day's work. He suckled at it; desperate to swallow as much of the sticky coating as possible. Before long, both heartbeats synched into one powerful pulse that rang in his head. He never felt so alive, not even with Cassilda.

Finally, when he could only taste Manuel's naturalness, he pulled the cock out of his mouth and proceeded to clean the rest with his tongue. At first, he did so slowly, so he could get a feel for the bumpy landscape that called to mind relief maps of hilly terrain. He then picked up his pace to properly lap it strongly and with gusto.

At the sound of Manuel's moan, he gently and playfully dragged his fingernails along the big man's lower abdomen, just above the shaft. Manuel lifted his head to look at the smaller, feminized man putting his heart and soul into pleasuring him. Ambrose returned his gaze with a wicked smile and a wink while still tonguing the massive penis.

Manuel brushed Ambrose' cheek gently with the back of his hand. Ambrose had never felt such tenderness while making love. Not even close. All of his past experiences were fraught with anxiety over his tiny penis. He suspected that most of the women he fucked merely followed through because they were nude and horny, and it was too late to back out. With Manuel, it was entirely possible that his tiny penis was part of the attraction.

He gently fondled the big man's large balls and proceeded to press his tongue firmly against them as the heavy member laid across his face. They were muskier and tastier than the cock. The aroma sent him to a new height of lasciviousness. Occasionally, he would stop and plant kisses on Manuel's inner thighs. It was a level of intimacy he had never shown any woman except Cassilda, but with her, it was pure lust. With Manuel, it was lust tinged with growing affection.

Ambrose turned his attention back to the penis. Unlike with the Masked Man, he reasoned that he just might be able to deep throat Manuel, but he wasn't sure. He wanted to because of the sense of pride the achievement would bring, but more so because it was his calling to satisfy men and what man wouldn't want that.

Thanks to Pippi he had conquered his gag reflex so at least that was not going to be a problem. There was still the question of whether or not he could manage to deep throat it without scraping it with his teeth which would hurt the big man. He varied the position and angle in which he sucked it in his mouth to better gauge how to follow through.

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