Helping Out

"Men are such jerks!" The sudden outburst from David's normally sedate and tranquil mother was quite out of character. His sister and he looked up from the breakfast table in surprise. "Oh sorry," she said, "I was miles away."

"Come on Mum, you can't just leave it at that," said my sister, Karen, "we all know they are," she continued looking at David pointedly, "but what has brought this on so suddenly?"

"It's not sudden," said their mother, Susan, "I've been coming round to that point of view for some time now. I just can't seem to find anyone who I'm even remotely interested in. The last one was a right creep, all he wanted to do was to make love in some very funny places. I'm pretty broadminded but he was going too far."

"A bit of spice is always good Mum," interjected David, Davy to the family, "and a romantic assignation making love out in the moonlight....."

"I'm not talking about those sort of places Davy, I'm talking about "up the bum!"". Candid conversations were not unusual in the family, their mother had brought them up to be open and free with their thoughts and feelings, but both siblings were a little shocked at their mother's candour. Susan had brought up the two children on her own since the untimely death of their father some ten years ago. Now that they were out of their teenage years, Davy being twenty-one and Karen twenty three, she had decided that she now had the time and energy to devote time to herself, specifically embarking on a new relationship.

Quite how she was going to find anyone she could imagine spending the rest of her life with proved troublesome at first, all her friends had got used to her as a single and never seemed to invite any single men to any gatherings. Then someone suggested an on-line dating agency. "Everyone does it these days, it's just like shopping on Amazon. You find something that looks OK, then you try it and if it doesn't fit you send it back and buy something else."

It seemed a bit like a cattle market to Susan, but the more she thought about it the more it seemed logical and sensible. There must after all, be lots of people like her out there and at least some of them ought to be genuine.

So she'd created an account and a profile and had embarked on a few dates. Davy and Karen knew about these, but they'd decided, without needing to speak to each other, to give their mother some space to find her feet in the dating scene.

This new revelation opened their eyes to the fact that it was not going too well. "Up the bum Mum?" mused Karen, "I didn't think you'd actually got as far as sleeping with any of your dates."

"I haven't, thank you very much young lady, my generation likes to take things a bit more sedately than yours," huffed Susan. "Anyway this was only our second date. When I told him, in no uncertain terms that I was not that sort of person, he said that all the other women he'd gone out with were perfectly OK with the idea. Needless to say that'll be the last time I'm seeing him."

Suddenly she stopped and tears came to her eyes, "I'm not that out of touch am I? I thought it would be gentle and romantic, but perhaps I'm just too old and set in my ways." Karen rushed round to her mother's side of the table and put her arm around her.

"No Mum, you're not any of those things, I would have reacted in exactly the same way as you did."

"So why can't I find the right sort of person then, why do I attract all the creeps?"

"Perhaps your profile is misleading?" suggested Davy helpfully, "Why don't Karen and I have a look at it and see if we can make some suggestions?" Davy was in his final year at college doing photography and Karen was finding her feet in a creative design company. "Between us we should be able to help."

Susan brightened and thanked them. She got her phone and opened up her profile. "Mum, where on earth did you get that photo?" burst out Davy.

"Oh, it's an old passport photo I had hanging around," said his mother.

Karen was poking around the rest of the pages, "We can definitely improve this Mum, make you look a lot more sophisticated to upscale your target market. There's a section where you can upload a photo gallery, we can get Davy to take some nice photos of you in evening gowns and suchlike, make it look as though you go out to a load of posh do's. We'll start now, Davy, get your camera. Where are we going to take the photos?"

Davy paused, "How about Mum's bedroom, the light is good in there and the furnishings are soft, we can make it look a bit intimate and the background colours are neutral."

"Sound like I've hired myself a good team," said Susan, "let's get started then. Perhaps you can help me with some make-up Karen while Davy gets his stuff together, and then we can pick out some of my posh frocks from the back of the wardrobe."

They trooped off upstairs and set to. Davy fetched his camera and went into his mother's bedroom where she was sitting at her dressing table, Karen fussing round her with various bits of make-up and brushes. Davy sat down to watch, fascinated by how long it took, but equally amazed at how his mother's face came to life. She really was very attractive, he mused, she must have been a real stunner in her day.

"Right, I think we'll start off with the portrait photo," said Davy. He put his camera on a tripod and sitting his mother down, he fiddled with the settings. "The good thing about digital cameras is that we can take loads of photos with different settings and pick the best ones later," he explained, "and I've got some editing software so we can even touch things up a bit."

He took ten or so pictures, examining each one on the screen, then said, "These'll do nicely, we can make all the fine adjustments on the computer later. Where are we going to do the gallery photos?" They picked out a spot near the full length curtains and took some sample shots of her dressed in her normal everyday clothes. Satisfied with the setup he said, "Right Mum, posh frock time. Do you want me to leave while you get changed?"

"No Davy, don't bother, you've seen your old mum in bra and knickers often enough." With that she unbuttoned her blouse and took it off, revealing herself in a plain white bra. For the first time Davy looked at his mother's breasts with a professional eye, they were medium sized, and her bra gave her a small cleavage. She hadn't been in the sun recently so the colour was uniform, no tan lines and altogether he thought they looked pretty good.

Karen had gathered some dresses and laid them on the bed. "We'll just have some smart but ordinary ones first Mum. Try this one." This was a mid-calf frock, not evening wear but what would be termed smart casual. Susan unzipped her jeans and wriggled them off. Her knickers could best be described as comfortable, granny pants, high waisted and pretty shapeless. "Mum, you don't still wear those do you, you ought to get yourself something sexier."

"These will do fine for me, they're comfortable and I'm used to them." She pulled the dress cautiously over her head to avoid smudging the carefully applied make-up and did the back zip up. Karen teased her hair back into shape and Davy started taking photos, holding the camera by hand to get different angles.

"Ok, let's ramp it up a bit," ordered Davy. They tried a few more dresses, each one a little more formal until they only had a slinky, black sheath type dress left.

"Oh, I think I'm past wearing something like that now, let's call it a day shall we?"

"Mum, don't be ridiculous, the whole idea is to make you look glamorous, this dress is fabulous, I'd wear it myself if I had somewhere posh to go. However you just can't wear it with those awful knickers, they're too lumpy and bumpy and anyway, just imagine when the man of your dreams take it off you and discovers them underneath. He'll run a mile, total passion killers! I'll go and get some of mine, you can borrow them, we're about the same size."

Karen disappeared and reappeared a minute late with a couple of pairs of lace panties. By no means thongs, they were high cut and see through. Davy stared at them, imagining his sister in them and his cock stirred. "Oh," said his Mum, "I think there's going to be a bit of a problem. I can't wear those with...." she hesitated and dropped her voice, whispering so really only Karen could hear, "...my err, lady garden." She turned her back to Davy and pulled the inside leg of her knickers an inch or so open.

"Mum," whispered Karen, "how on earth could you let it get like that. We need to sort that now. Davy," She commanded, "go and get your beard trimmer, then leave us for a while, we'll call you when you're needed again." Davy returned with his trimmer and found Karen setting a towel down on the bed. He unslung his camera and set it down on the dressing table, then left the room and closed the door behind him.

About half an hour later he heard his name being called and returned upstairs, knocking politely on the door, "It's OK we're decent," his mother called, he opened the door and entered, going straight to his camera and picking it up. His mother was now dressed in the black slinky number and his jaw dropped. She looked absolutely fabulous.

"Mum, you look gorgeous," he said, "I'd be honoured to take you out dressed like that, I'd have every man green with envy."

"Oh, son, don't be daft."

"He's right Mum," chipped in Karen, "you look ten years younger and simply fabulous." Davy took plenty of pictures, thinking she looked good enough to put in a professional's portfolio. Finally they were done.

"I'll go and download these," Davy said, "then we can work on them and decide what to put on the site. Karen, why don't you try and write something that will make every sophisticated, rich handsome man fight to take Mum out, whilst keeping the creeps away."

Davy went to his room and plugged the camera into the computer. A mass of file names appeared, "Yes!" exclaimed Davy triumphantly, seeing one in particular. He carefully put that in another folder and called his mother and Karen in. This is what I've got so far and they gathered round to look. A slideshow started, which they watched with lots of "oohs and aahs". Davy was a good photographer and some of the pictures when cropped and lighting and colour touched up, were going to be excellent.

"Thanks, Davy," said his mother, they look really good. I do appreciate all this."

"No problem Mum, I really enjoyed doing it. Karen and Susan departed and Davy closed his bedroom door. He opened the folder on his computer and looked for the file he had moved there. It was a video file, huge, but he had plenty of memory. He clicked on play and it opened in a viewer.

The picture revealed was his mother's bedroom, showing a white towel on the bed. Two figures appeared, his mother and Karen although only their lower bodies were visible. "Right Mum, let's have a look then now Davy's not here. Susan put her thumbs in the waistband of her granny pants and with her back to the camera pushed them down. "Oh my word," exclaimed Karen, "that's not a lady garden that's more like a jungle. How on earth can you put up with that?"

"Well I'm sort of used to it, I've always been a bit hairy and in my day you got on with whatever God gave you. Only prostitutes shaved down there, or so we were told."

"What do you want to do with it, are you going to go completely bald, or triangle shaped, or you could have a landing strip?"

"I don't know," said Susan "I was hoping you'd help. What's a landing strip look like?"

"It's what I've got Mum, look I'll show you." With that Karen unzipped her jeans and pulled them down to her thighs and pulled the elasticated top of her panties down a few inches revealing a two inch wide strip of pubic hair."

Davy's eyes nearly popped out of his head. Beyond his wildest dreams his sister was exposing her pubes. He paused the video and pulled his cock out of his trousers, half erect already. He began to squeeze and pull it and it stiffened rapidly. He pressed play again.

"You can have it as wide or narrow as you want, it's a nice compromise between totally shaven and the standard triangle."

"Yes, I think I'd like that. Can you help me or even better do it for me? I know I'm asking a lot, you're my daughter not a bikini line trimmer, but I'd feel really embarrassed going anywhere, and I don't feel confident doing it myself."

"Ok Mum, no problem, scoot round and sit on the towel then." Susan sat down and now facing the camera opened her legs.

Davy nearly came on the spot as he pressed pause and gazed at his mother's vulva. It was almost totally invisible due to the mass of crinkly dark hair covering it, but he zoomed in and could just make out the shape of her labia, dark skinned behind everything. He stroked his cock even harder and pressed play once more.

Karen knelt between her mother's legs and switched his beard trimmer on, bringing it up to Susan's hairy muff. She blocked the view momentarily but soon she was busily manoeuvring the trimmer up and down.

Davy watched engrossed as the trimmer that he had been sliding over his face that very morning, round his mouth, was now sliding over his mother's vulva.

"There," said Karen, sitting back, "that's got the basic shape in place, now you need to get a razor and remove all the little hairs. And you might want to, err, shave your lips. It'll look much nicer and it's err..." she faltered.

"Much nicer for a man to kiss and lick?" finished her mother. "It's alright Karen, I not naïve enough to expect you to be an innocent virgin still, and I expect you've tried oral sex. Your father and I used to really enjoy it."

"It'll be easier to do in the bath Mum, your skin will be a lot softer. I think I've got up close and personal enough with my mother so if you don't mind I'll let you do that."

"Thanks Karen, I really appreciate this. I'll give you a shout when I'm done." With that Susan got up and went into her en-suite bathroom, from where the sound of the bath filling could be heard.

The video was static now, just centred on the towel and Davy waited for something else to happen. Still stroking his cock he pressed fast forward until a figure appeared. Backing up slightly he reverted to normal speed.

Susan approached the camera wrapped in a white towel, the focus struggled a bit then the screen went white as she came right up to the camera. It cleared again and her body was visible again still wrapped in the towel. The towel was released and there stood Susan, totally naked, her neatly trimmed landing strip on full display above a pair of clearly visible pussy lips. She picked up a bottle and shook it, causing her breasts to wobble, only the bottoms visible. Susan poured some cream onto the fingers of her right hand then rubbed it into her pussy, causing the lips to distort and move about. A finger dipped briefly inside and then re-emerged. She placed two fingers either side of her clitoral hood and pulled upwards, distorting the shape of her pussy lips, but opening it up. Seemingly satisfied she released it and the putting more cream on her fingers started to massage it into her upper thighs, bending forwards as she did so. Her breasts became fully visible, her dark nipples clearly visible.

During this Davy's stroking of his cock had become much more rapid, he paused the video then rewound to the point where his mother was rubbing the cream into her pussy, then put it on slow motion, frantically rubbing his cock. As her finger slid inside he came explosively, his semen shooting out all over the desk, narrowly missing the keyboard and he pushed back into his chair, his face scrunched up with the ecstasy of his orgasm.

On screen there was a call of "Karen!" then the sound of a door opening. Karen came into the picture and bending forward examined her mother's vulva. "That's much better Mum, now all you have to do is keep it that way." They went over to the bed and Susan's breasts were once more just visible as she went through the contortions that women do to put on a bra. Then she slipped on a pair of the panties that Karen had brought in and turning admired herself in the mirror.

"You're right you know, this looks and feel so much better."

"See Mum, I told you so. Right let's get this dress on and call Davy." Karen helped her on with the dress and satisfied with the look disappeared towards the door. "Davy, we're ready."

A short while and a knocking could be heard, "It's OK we're decent". Then the video shut off.

Trembling Davy stared at the now blank screen. It had been a sudden last minute thought to turn on video mode on his camera, a very high risk gamble but it had paid off. Jeez, what a sight, his sister's pubes then his mother's pussy and tits, all in high quality video. Material for wanking for ever!

-oOo-

Susan was so pleased with the professional looking outcome, best on the site she said, that she decided to treat her two children to a trip to London to the city Comedy Club where she had discovered their favourite comedian was performing. "Mum, it's too far to go in one day," Davy protested.

"No, I've booked us rooms for the week after next at the neighbouring Premier Inn, Karen and I will share a twin and you can have a single. I insist, it will do us all good anyway." Although reluctant to take such an offer the siblings bowed under their mother's pressure and the trip was on.

Disaster struck three days before they were due to go, Karen's firm was heavily engaged in a project for their biggest client and Karen was required for an offsite at the other end of the country. There was no way she would be able to spare the time anyway, she told a disappointed Susan and Davy. Susan rang the hotel and cancelled the single room, "Sorry son, we'll just have to share the twin, you don't mind do you?"

Davy's mind flitted back to the video of his mother that he had surreptitiously obtained, the prospect of seeing his mother again rose to the front of his mind and he said that he didn't mind in the slightest.

The day arrived and Susan and her son travelled to London and made their way to the hotel to check in. Susan went up to the check in desk and Davy saw his mother engaged in what appeared to be an animated conversation with the receptionist. "Bloody idiots," she fumed, "they've cancelled the wrong room. Apparently they saw Mr and Mrs on the booking and assumed we were husband and wife, so they left the single room and cancelled the twin. So sorry Davy, we'll have to share a bed. I'm sure we can do that can't we?"

Davy concurred, wondering just what would ensue. They made their way to the room and saw that it wasn't going to be too bad, the room was quite small, but the bed was huge, there would be plenty of room to avoid each other. Dress code for the Club was very casual, so Davy changed out of his travelling clothes into something a bit smarter in the bathroom, whilst his mother changed in the bedroom. They made their way to the club which was below a bar, and had a few drinks before they went downstairs.

It was an excellent evening, the acts were brilliant, according to Davy, although his mother bristled a little at some of the language, albeit Davy did notice that she was having to restrain herself from laughing at some of the cruder ones. The show finished quite late and they left the Club along with most of the other patrons. The hotel wasn't far away and they were meandering back when they passed a pub, a bit scruffy looking, but his Mum suggested a last drink and Davy wasn't going to refuse.

Inside looked even worse, but they settled down with about 40 or so other customers. They were just finishing their drinks when there was a loud announcement, "Lock in starts in ten minutes, get your last drinks now or be prepared to leave."