I Love You Ch. 01

I fill with dread as Taylor pushes me into the house. I stumble back a bit due to the amount of force he used. I look up at him and see nothing but rage in his eyes. He grabs my arm and proceeds to pull me towards the stairs, but I pull back.

"You are in so much trouble, you little slut!" Taylor screamed.

"Please, Taylor, I'm sorry!" I exclaim.

"You're sorry?! News flash, sorry won't cut it. How dare you let another man touch you, especially in that way! Did you think I wouldn't find out?!" he scolded.

"I didn't want to touch him, Taylor, please!" I exclaim.

I try to pull away from his iron grip, but he hangs onto me, tightly. Taylor gets close to my face, so close than I can smell his aftershave.

"If you were truly sorry, you wouldn't have let that son of a bitch touch you." He growls darkly.

My eyes welled up in tears. He knows. He out of everyone fucking knows just how much I hate being touched by people I don't know, yet in this moment, in this vulnerable, painful moment, he exploits my weakness.

"I didn't want him to touch me," I calmly start. My right hand pries open his grip from my arm and I throw his hand away from me.

"I hate allowing anyone that isn't close to me to touch me! I tried to push him off, I tried getting away! Why can't you understand that?!" I exclaim.

The tears I desperately tried to keep at bay start to trail down my face. I look up at him and all I can see is anger and frustration. After all these years of being together, how? How could he let some misunderstanding get between us? I thought he knew me better.

"You know what, I'm done trying to convince you. After all this time, I thought you knew me. I thought you understood what I went through, but clearly, you don't. If you want to think that I'm a slut, go ahead." I screamed with tears trickling down my face.

Before he could say anything, I ran upstairs into a guest bedroom and slammed the door shut. I locked the door and proceeded to push a table in front of it just for good measure. Sobbing, I slipped out of my dress and walked into the bathroom. Thank goodness there was a bathroom in here.

I take off my undergarments and observed the bruises that were already forming after the incident. Earlier this evening, Taylor and I went to a party for Seth's company. I told him that I didn't want to go, that I would just dull down his mood. Taylor reassured me that it was fine and if I wanted to leave, then we'd leave. When we got there, my shyness got the best of me and I decided to hide out in the restrooms. On my way there, a middle aged man pulled me aside and started to make unwanted advances. I tried my best to get away, but as I have experienced multiple acts of sexual assault in the past, my body shut down in an attempt to protect me.

I walked over to the bathtub and turned on the faucet and sat down on the edge of the bath. I sniffle and rub my face in an attempt to stop crying, but the tears keep rolling down my face. Why doesn't Seth trust me? Why can't he understand? I did my best, but my best is never good enough. Nothing I do will ever be good enough for him, because he's right, I'm a slut. I'm completely worthless. I'm a failure at everything I do. I let down everyone I love. I'm sick and tired of trying...

I slowly get into the bathtub and let out a sigh. I look down to find that my wrists are starting to bruise up, adding to the collection of bruises that accumulated due to tonight's events. More tears stream down my face and I sigh. I love Taylor, so much that it hurts. Why? Why would he do this to me? My knees instinctively come up to my chest and my arms wrap around them. Rocking back and forth, I let out everything that I was bottling up this evening: anger, sadness, hurt, betrayal, most of all, shame. If I had been perfect, less scarred, less traumatized, I would have been able to get out, get myself out of that impossible situation.

Sniffling, I end my crying session and pulled the plug out of the tub, watching the water as it drains from the tub. I rub my arms and step out of the tub, shivering as the air bites at my skin. Wrapping my arms around my chest, I step into the bedroom and walked over towards the closet next to the bathroom door. Upon opening it, I find a plush white bathrobe. Pulling it out, I adorn it and wipe my eyes and face of the salty ripples that may or may not be still there. God I'm definitely gonna have puffy eyes in the morning. I climb into the bed, pull the covers over me, and laid my head on the pillow, hoping to be taken off to dreamland. Luckily, darkness soon took over, giving me what I wanted at last: peace.

At around 3 in the morning, I hear a knock on the door. I slowly open my eyes to see if this was really the case or if it was just a dream. Nothing. I close my eyes, thinking it was a dream, however, the knocking got louder. I quickly sat up and I saw that the person trying to get in unlocked the door. I sat up and scoot back until my back hit the headboard, hoping that the perpetrator wasn't here to hurt me. As the door opened, the table moved with it to, making an obnoxious, high pitched squeaking sound. When the door was wide open, the darkness of the night only allowed me to see a silhouette of whoever tried to break in. Despite only seeing the outline, I knew it was him. Taylor.

"What are you doing, Taylor?" I ask, shakily.

"I... I just came to apologize," Taylor replied, solemnly.

I gulp down and pull my legs up to my chest to make myself look smaller. Deciding that darkness was not a good setting to have a decent conversation, I turn on the lamp sitting on top of the bedside table and turn back to him. My eyes widen in shock at what I see.

Taylor's eyes are red and puffy; his normally perfect hair was disheveled and messy and his breathing is ragged. I've never seen him look so disoriented.

"I forgive you, Taylor, please go back to bed," I breathe out, holding back my emotions.

"Mina, please," Taylor pleads, stepping closer to the side of the bed.

"Look, tonight was exhausting. I just... I just don't have the energy to talk right now, please let's just talk in the morning," I reason.

"Mina, I'm not leaving the room until you hear what I have to say," Taylor replied.

Reluctantly, I breathe out a "fine."

Tayor takes a seat at the edge of the bed. His hands come up and combs through his perfect chocolate tresses, despite it being messy. Slowly, he cranes his neck over to where I am, his eyes never meeting mine.

"Mina, I-I know you have a past that deals with situations like this. I should have thought about what I said before I even opened my mouth. I'm so sorry, I never meant any of those horrible things I said."

Liar.

"I-If you d-didn't, why would you say them in the first place, Taylor? You out of all people should know how uncomfortable I am around people, especially in regards to touching. Yet, you still chose to take your unsolicited anger out on me, for what? Because some guy harassed me and I couldn't push him off because I froze?!" I exclaim painfully.

"I'm sorry, Mina. I really am. You know how I get with these sorts of things," he responds.

That's when I lose it.

"Oh so, it's okay for you to act out on your vices but it's not okay for me to freeze up? Jesus Christ, Taylor I don't even know why I'm still wasting my time on this! I'm sorry, alright?! I'm so fucking sorry that I can't be the perfect girlfriend!"

Tears are pouring down my cheeks again. I choke out a sob and try to wipe away the tears with the back of my hand, but more come to take its place.

Taylor looks at me with shock and worry. He gets onto the bed and scoots closer to me. Taking me in his arms, he presses my head into his chest. My arms go up and lay next to my head. Closing my eyes, I continue to let the tears fall, but suddenly, I feel a kiss on my forehead.

"Shh, don't cry baby. I-I'm so sorry, and don't think for a second that you aren't the perfect girl for me. You're everything," Taylor coos out.

"N-No, you're wrong. I'm filthy. I'm a filthy, disgusting, damaged slut," I choke out, sobbing in between the list.

"No, you're not. You are none of those things, Mina. I don't want you to say those things about yourself ever again or so help me I will take you across my knee," he growls out.

Taylor slowly pulls away from me. His right hand crips my chin and tilts it up, making me meet his eyes. Brown to gray.

"You are perfect. It doesn't matter what you went through, your past and your experiences build you into the person you are today, and I love you for who you are, not just the happy girl, but the sad girl, the angry girl, all of it. I know I made you doubt your worth tonight and I'll never forgive myself for that, but you are perfect the way you are, Mina. Nothing in this world can make me change my mind about that," he declares firmly.

I lower my gaze and he lets off of my chin. He pulls me closer and we lay in each other's embrace for what seems like hours. His warmth spreads throughout my body like a wildfire, burning up every tree of doubt and insecurity that grew and leaving nothing but reassurance and love in its wake. Slowly, I drift off to sleep, but the peace does not last long as I feel something poking me between my thighs.

"Ow," I mutter.

"Sorry baby, but you were moving too much," he says painfully.

I slowly sit up and straddle him, making the situation inevitably worse. Taylor lets out a hiss of pain and glares at me while I flash my most innocent smile back at him.

"You little minx," he breathes out while in pain.

"What do you mean, sir?" I respond, lowly.

An emotion I will never be able to miss flashes in his eyes as he lunges at me and pushes me down so I'm below him. He situates himself so his left thigh is in between my legs.

"You wanna play, little one?" He asks in a dark tone of voice.

I slowly nod and Taylor gives me a wolffish smirk. Looking down, I see him looking at the sash that's holding my robe together.

"Are you wearing anything underneath?" he asked.

Slowly, I shake my head, slightly frightened for his reaction. To be fair, there was nothing but this robe in the closet and I wasn't about to walk into our room after our fight.

"Good girl," he breathes out. My eyes widen.

Taylor undoes the sash around my waist and the edges of the robe fall away from each other, exposing almost everything. I immediately bring my hands down to cover myself up, but before I could even touch the robe, Taylor brings my hands over my head and begin to tie the sash around them.

"Don't," he says as he finishes his handiwork. "Don't ever hide yourself from me. All of this, is mine."

He traces his hand from my clavicle all the way down to my stomach, stopping just above a prominent scar, just above my belly button. I watch his hand pause and immediately turn my head away in shame. I hated every scar that was on my body and no matter how much reassurance I got from him, I will always hate them.

Taylor senses my discomfort and immediately leans down to kiss my scar, causing me to flinch. I remember how I got the scar distinctly. It was the reason why Taylor and I met in the first place. I was walking home after work one night and I ran into a man who was cleaning up some broken glass on the sidewalk. He had a rather large shard in his hand and when I bumped into him, the shard cut through my shirt and embedded itself into my skin. I remember screaming in pain and the shock of the man. He quickly called an ambulance and when I was in the ER, I met him. He was kind, gentle, but domineering, and I quickly fell under his spell. We slowly got to know each other better after that and I fell in love with him. Hard.

The hand that was tracing my body comes up to my chin and straightens my face out so my eyes would meet his. Taylor had an apologetic smile on when I finally looked at him and he leans down to kiss me on the lips.

"Never turn away from me like that, Mina. I don't care how many scars you have. I love them, and I love you," he declares.

"Besides," he starts as he pulls away, "this one is how we met," he comments in an amused tone as he traces it again.

I couldn't help but let out a giggle as he does this and I hear him chuckle as well. He knows I'm extremely ticklish and he's taking full advantage of it.

"Shh... we wouldn't want to wake anyone up, now would we?" he sardonically remarks.

I shake my head and bring my lips together in a tight line, bracing myself for what was about to happen.

"What would you like me to do?" he asks huskily.

"I-I don't know, s-sit," I reply, clearly uncomfortable with what was happening. His kissing and teasing already has me hot and bothered, and he knows this.

He laughs at my dilemma and his hand quickly goes down and cups my sex. I let out a whimper as he does this, throwing my head back in ecstasy. He hasn't even done anything drastic and I'm already reacting like this, how embarrassing!

"I love how responsive you are to me, little one," he says while toying with the entrance of my pussy, never entering. He leans down next to my left ear and nibbles on it, never stopping his exploits down under.

"P-Please," I whine out, desperate for release. I do my best to stay still, but to no avail as his fingers start to rub my sex. I feel myself dripping for him, yet he continues to slather it all over my pussy, instead of giving me what I want.

"Shh, your little moans are so adorable, baby girl, but I only want them for myself, no one else. So, you'll have to be quiet," he whispers out.

I feel his thumb come up to my clit and rub it, causing a shockwave of pleasure to flow through my body. I moan out rather loudly and in response, he laughs at my frustration.

"Is my little girl desperate? Am I not giving your snatch enough attention?" he coos out in a patronizing tone. I do my best to hold back any and all sounds that may slip out of my mouth, but he continues to play with my pussy like a fiddle.

"Oh god, please sir, please -"

Before I could say anymore, I feel two fingers plunge into me and I immediately buck up and let out a scream. Taylor grabs my neck with his other hand and pushes me down. His lips connect with mine, muffling my screams of pleasure. Our lips battle for dominance, and he obviously wins. His fingers continue to move in and out of me. I feel myself getting wetter and hotter and I tense up as his fingers bring me almost over the edge. Almost.

Right before I come, Taylor pulls his fingers out of me, causing me to whine out in pain and displeasure. I was so close! Please!

"I warned you to be quiet, little one," Taylor growls out, feigning anger. I know he wasn't actually angry, but whenever he uses that tone of voice with me, I immediately fall into submission. Before I could apologize and beg for mercy, he gets off of me and leaves the room, but leaves the door open. I sit up and adjust myself so I was sitting side-saddle, with my bound hands holding me up for stabilization. The amount of pleasure I got from Taylor and his fingers just now caused my mind to go in a haze and I feel myself slipping from the parameters of reality. I feel myself lurching forward, but I continue to hold myself up. Not long after, Taylor returns and his right hand comes under my chin and lifts my head up.

"Are you feeling alright?" he asks with genuine concern.

"Yes sir," I nod.

Taylor smiles and adjusts me so my head was now facing the headboard. He brings my already bound hands over my head and undoes the sash. In its place, rope slithers its way around my wrists and Taylor secures the other end at the headboard. Now, I'm bound and trapped and at his discretion. I pull on my restraints and look up towards it, slightly unsettled at the scene, but I know that I can trust him. I look back up to Taylor to be met with a smirk.

"I know how much you like to cry out for me, but I don't want anyone to enjoy my girl's screams but me," he says with his smirk. I tilt my head to the left ever so slightly in an inquisitive way. He smiles and reaches over to the nightstand next to the bed and presents a piece of white cloth.

"Open your mouth for me a bit," he asks. I do so.

Taylor brings to cloth over and into my mouth and secures it tightly at the back of my head. I'd never been gagged before, so this was definitely different.

"Feeling alright?" he asks. I nod yes and he smiles.

Taylor's hands come up to my waist and trails all the way down to my hip. I squirm at the contact, embarrassed at the intimate way he touched me, despite having various sexual interactions with him before this incident. I don't think I'll ever get used to his touch. I look down at see him spread my legs and nestle his head in between my thighs. Oh no.

Before I could react, I feel something warm caressing my clit. His tongue. Fuck. I squirm away in an attempt to get away from that feeling, knowing how much it does to me, but he holds my hips down, causing me to lay there, trapped and at his mercy. He continues to lick my clit, but swiftly moves down to my opening. He flicks his tongue out at my entrance a few times.

"Mmf," I mumble out.

I feel him smirk against my pussy and a cold feeling of dread falls over me. He's not going to let me go, is he? As I contemplate the answer to that question, I feel his tongue dart into me. The walls of my pussy clench down, but he moves it around.

"Mmm!" I moan out, muffled by the gag. I throw my head back due to the delicious sensation. For a moment I was relieved I had it, otherwise everyone on the block would hear me and I am in no way an exhibitionist, craving the attention for strangers and their opinions on my sexual exploits.

"Mmm..." I moan out again, tears are starting to form at the amount of pleasure I'm getting from this. I look down again to see his eyes closed. His tongue is still lapping up all my juices and I can still feel that warm appendage inside of me, eliciting all different types feelings from within me. I feel my core tense up and I know I'm going to come soon.

"Mmm!" I moan out, louder this time to let him know what was about to happen, but I doubt he needed my warning as instead of slowing down and allowing me to feel tortured by my lack of release, Taylor moves his tongue quicker and deeper, fucking me hard with only his tongue. I watch as his left hand come down to my clit and slowly caress it, building my pleasure up even more. Oh fuck.

"Come for me, baby," he mutters out against my pussy. The vibrations from his voice hits me in a different way and upon hearing those words, I scream out, coming hard.

I breathe in and out, moaning in between all the breaths. His hand is still circling my clit as I come and continues to do so until I've come down from my high. I close my eyes and I know for sure my face is red with embarrassment. I feel him climb up towards me, his eyes glaring down at me. He tugs the gag down and my breathy moans are a lot more audible than what it was a few moments ago.

"How was that, little one? Did you feel good?" he asks as the back of his hand comes up to my cheek.

"It... it felt... good, sir," I breathe out at a loss for words. I look back up to him and his face adorns a beautiful and warm smile. I watch him as he undoes my restraints and adjusts my robe. He pulls the gag away from me and tosses all of the lovely contraptions away from us. Finally, Taylor lays back down with me.

"I'm glad you had fun, little one," Taylor says.

"But what about you, sir?" I ask innocently.

His hard gaze lazers straight through my soul and I felt so small and vulnerable in this moment.

"Tonight was about you, Mina. I'll have my fun later, but this your pleasure is a lot more important to me than mine," he said with nothing but honesty.

I feel myself smiling at his declaration and I move in closer to him. I feel his arms drape around my shoulder and I relax in his hold.