I'm a What? [BOOK FOUR]

Prologue: Not a Vampire. Not a Werewolf. Not a Zombie. What am I?

I'm dreaming. I mean, like, I realize I'm dreaming. I think it's called lucid dreaming or something.

I'm just upset I can't wake up. It's really frustrating me. I've been sitting—I think—going around and around in my head about how I'm dreaming but I can't wake up. I've tried pinching myself, screaming at myself, and even rubbing one out. So far, though, nothing's worked.

What's worse is that I can't remember how I got here. Uh, wherever here is.

I remember getting an awesome facial and massage, talking to Samantha and having one of those self-actualization moments that have been popping up with the frequency of groundhogs in February. Is that a saying? Hell, I'm making it one. I remember walking out, meeting Bane, and...and...nothing. Blank space.

Well, almost. Falling. A feeling of weightlessness. That's my last memory before I got plopped here.

I'm a little worried about Bane. My husband tends to freak out when stuff like this happens and, sadly, it happens pretty often. My life's just one supernatural disaster after another.

Maybe "disaster" isn't the right word. It's sort of like my friend's sister's graduation. There we were, sitting on the hot bleachers with way too much makeup on for the North Carolina heat. Of course, when Kate's sister got on stage, we all cheered and stomped our feet like mad. It was great. Then we had to wait for the rest of the kids to get their certificates and leave. I was bored out of my mind until Vernon Elliott got on stage. I didn't know the kid personally, but after what he did, everyone knew his name. Good ole' Vernon got on stage, took his certificate, and stripped down. For about five seconds the kid just stood there, all his pasty white skin on display with only the smallest, most miniscule man-thong covering his giblets.

That's what my life felt like. A steady, mindless progression to some event and then bam! A sudden curveball the size of Vernon Elliott. No one expected it, but there it was. For me, that first curveball had been dying, but that was by far the least exciting of them all. My Vernon Elliott moment came in the shape of a decapitated vamp who did not shrivel up or turn into dust.

Worse than dying, more intense than being married to a vampire king, and more gross than eating some blue ball out of a dead guy, was seeing the dude who had kidnapped me—and was just an all-around jerk—in a pool of sticky, wet, never-coming-ou-tof-this-outfit blood. No amount of Silence of the Lambs, Criminal Minds, or Law and Order prepared me for the shock.

Wait. What's my point? Damn, I forgot.

Argh, this stupid lucid dreaming crap is going to drive me crazy. I wish I could just wake up. Wake up and find that nothing changed. Finally accept that my life is going to be a chaotic jumble of Vernon Elliott moments, but that didn't change me as a person.

So I don't know what I am. So my husband is a vampire who hangs out with witches and werewolves. So I'm a vampire queen with none of the stereotypical queen duties. None of that has really changed me. And when I wake up, I will be the same person I've always been: Georgia Kent. Peaches, now that I'm dead.

I just need to wake up. I need to—

I wasn't sure what it was, but before I was dreaming and the next second my eyes were open. "About time," I muttered as I blinked the blurriness away. The room I was in looked weird, like there was a veil over it. Had I slept with a scarf over my face? It was a wonder I didn't suffocate.

I moaned as I tried to move on the bed. My back hurt like a bitch and I was starving. I didn't look down at my arm because a part of me worried that my fur/fuzz was back. Ugh, that would totally suck. I'd been fine with wearing long sleeves and jeans on top of a mountain when I'd been chilling with Alpha Lorenzo's pack, but in Cairo? Hell no! I'd just have to start telling people that I had some kind of disease or my razor broke.

"Bane?" My husband was always nearby, my knight in shining armor—though that might be stretching it. I loved Bane, but the dude could be kind of a possessive asshole sometimes.

"I heard that."

Ah, there he was, in my head like always. It used to really irk me that my husband could read my thoughts and get in my head but I'd gotten used to it. I'd gotten used to a lot of things.

I blinked, trying to bring the room into focus. I really needed to get this scarf off of me. I reached up, ready to rip the thing off, but my hand hit something. I tried to lean up, but my forehead bounced off a wall of some sort. Uh, ow!

"Damn," I groaned and to reach up to rub my head, but I couldn't even do that much.

I tried to focus, but the room was blurry. I turned my head and noticed that it wasn't a scarf at all. Shit, I didn't know what it was.

I started to freak out.

I don't know why I even bothered. I knew exactly what this was: another Vernon Elliott moment. I wondered how bad this one would be. With the way I was going, it would be the worst yet.

"Okay, okay, calm down." I tried to reach out to Bane, but I was still too panicked. Figured. I wondered why he wasn't just helping me. Was he far away? I tried to reach out for Samantha, Luther, or Casper, but couldn't get through. Had I even heard Bane or had that just been my imagination? Wow, this calming down thing really wasn't working.

I closed my eyes. Think. Think. Think. It was just like when I'd first woken up in that morgue and thought I was dead. I'd had to eliminate possibilities. That had pretty much been my life for the last two weeks. I'd thought I was a vampire. I wasn't. I'd thought I was a werewolf. I wasn't. I'd thought I was a zombie. Yup, you guessed it: I wasn't.

So, it was just another elimination game. What slept and then woke up with a scarf-like thing on it? Hmm... a mummy? I was a mummy Peach. Yeah, no.

I lifted up my hands again and started to claw at the material around me. It felt soft but hard, like papier-mâché. It gave under my fingers and I felt air rush over my fingertips. I kept pushing, clawing. More noises hit me, indistinct sounds became words, and certain scents suddenly crystallized into pictures in my mind. I smelled oil, spicy and strong, something from the Middle East. Bane.I got another scent, something I could only describe as expensive. That was definitely Casper. I heard their voices, too, but I was still freaking out a little too much. My fingers were at my chest, tugging and pulling the stuff around me away.

Hmm, something smelled delicious. Better than chocolate and fresh fruit. It smelled how I thought Bane and I smelled after we had intense, explosive sex—like the second after I came and he came and the world exploded around us and everything was destroyed, and then when I opened my eyes it was remade.

I moaned, desperate to get to the source. I closed my eyes as my hands reached my face and tore off the rest of the material. I stretched, wiggled as Bane's voice washed over me, hushed with a touch of incredulity. "Peaches?"

I opened my eyes. It was bright, too bright. There were more colors in our bedroom than there were names for them, and I could hear everyone's voice more clearly—the pitch and tenor, the hesitation. I wondered if it was like this for newbie vamps. Actually, this was what I expected when I woke up in that morgue. That hadn't been what I'd gotten, but now...

I looked to Bane. God, he looked good: all sexy, six feet plus of chocolate-covered muscle. Slight five o'clock shadow and eyes that weren't just brown. Why had I ever thought they were just dark brown? That didn't do them justice. Brown and orange and blue, like a dying fire mixed with earth, but they were redder than usual, little streams moving through his irises.

But the very next second everything turned back to normal. Bane looked the same as he always had, the light wasn't too bright, and nobody's voice sounded like a chorus of angels. Well, it was back to reality, and that kind of sucked.

The only thing that remained the same was that scent. It didn't smell as sharp and clear as before, but just as delicious. I groaned, feeling like a boxer fresh out of the ring except my opponent had only focused on my shoulder blades.

I sat up gingerly and looked around the room. "What time is it?"

Everyone looked shocked, and they were far away from the bed. Luther was with Samantha, lips pursed with his eyes redder than I'd ever seen them. Red eye meant a vampire used too much energy and needed to eat. The way Luther was looking at me, I was pretty sure he wanted to drain me dry. I wondered how he stopped himself from doing that very thing to the beating heart next to him.

Samantha was Luther's wife and a witch. That pretty much meant that vampires could drink her blood like a human's. They just better make sure they drained her quick because a witch's power was in their voice, and Samantha had one helluva voice.

"Someone want to get Luther out of here? I'm not interested in being the main course."

Bane used his vamp speed and was by my side, but still out of arm's reach, in a second. His expression grim as he asked, "Do you remember anything that's happened in the last few hours?"

I looked at him, then around the room again. Oh! Zeno was here, too. She was standing on the other side of the bed with Casper. They looked a little hostile, a little like: Peaches did something crazy again and I'm not sure how to take it.

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "Did I spit acid at someone or accidentally kill a person again?" That was my life: spitting acid and accidently killing people.

"No." Bane shook his head and took a tentative step towards me. Zeno hissed.

I looked around the room again. Seriously? What the fuck happened? I looked down at myself and realized I was naked. Sweet baby Jesus! I rolled, grabbing the sheet as I did so. "Why didn't anyone tell me I was in my birthday suit?" I jumped up with the sheet wrapped haphazardly around me. "I didn't know vamps were such pervs!"

Casper and Zeno were on the other side of the room with Bane, Samantha, and Luther. They'd put a lot of space between us. I looked at the bed. There was clear, paper-like stuff everywhere. It looked like a cocoon.

Oh God, please tell me I was not a—

"Argh!" Pain exploded in my back and I screamed.

God, it felt worse than when Darin McFlarity had taken my virginity on a gross cot in his dad's garage. I'd thought I was gonna die then, but now? Painful Peaches would be my new name if this kept going.

Thankfully, it didn't. As quickly as it had started, it stopped. Something soft brushed my cheek, and I looked up through red and watery eyes.

"Georgia?" Samantha's voice was worried. She usually sounded worried, but I guess that was my fault since I usually worried her.

"It is a monster," Zeno spat.

I turned to her. I'd thought we were getting somewhere, but now I was back to being an 'it.' I wouldn't have even given a crap about Zeno if she weren't my sister-in-law. Great, now I had to add 'getting Zeno to see me as a living thing' back on my mental To Do list.

I drew in a deep breath, needing to figure out what was going on. That smell hit me again: strong and delicious. I zoomed in on the source, and saw a blue ball glowing in Samantha's side. My stomach growled. I wanted it. I needed it. I couldn't think past it. I launched myself across the bed.

"Someone get her!" Casper yelled.

"Kill it!" Zeno demanded unhelpfully.

"She's going after Samantha," Luther warned.

"Touch my wife and I'll kill you," Bane threatened.

"Georgia..." Samantha's lips trembled, her eyes grew wide to the point of pain and her voice was barely audible, "Are those wings?"

Chapter One: Kill and Ask Questions Later

"I'm okay now!" I yelled for the hundredth time. Casper didn't seem convinced.

I rolled my eyes. "It was just a little mix-up. I was hungry and I thought Samantha had food."

Zeno was in front of me the next time I blinked. Her silky brown curls were wild and her fangs were out. "You thought she was food, demon."

I looked around the angry former queen to her husband leaning against a wall on the other side of the room. "Casper, come get your woman out of my face."

The blonde-haired, blue-eyed vampire looked at me with that impassive warrior cool I'd only seen when he'd been training me. It was the sort of look that made me think he saw me as a threat, and was weighing if he should kill me and risk Bane's temper or let me live and potentially hurt others. And he was the one who was supposed to be protecting me? Uh, no.

"Zeno, leave her alone." Finally, Casper the not-so-friendly vampire spoke. He smirked. "I still can't let you go, Peaches."

I shrugged. "Had to at least try, right?"

And try had been all I'd been able to do since the Samantha incident. I tried to get out of Bane's hold when he grabbed me. I tried to get to Samantha so I could eat whatever delicious thing she'd been hiding. And I tried to convince everyone that I was fine now. Hell, I was even trying to convince myself.

The wings weren't helping either. And neither was the fairy dust or whatever falling off them. I knew I wasn't a werewolf or zombie or vampire now. I wasn't even any creature I'd ever heard of before. Well, maybe there had been an episode about a butterfly monster on that show Grimm,but they made up all sorts of crap.

I winced as something soft brushed my cheek again. I knew what it was. Well, what they were: big, beautiful wings. Not like bird wings, but multi-colored butterfly ones. I'd caught a brief glimpse of the things in the mirror when Bane and Casper had dragged me out of the bedroom, and then strapped me to a dining room chair. Samantha had been hustled out of the hotel suite and, right after the door closed behind her, it was like I could think again.

I could also remember that I would be meeting a bunch of vampires tonight because I'd postponed the introductions, which meant I had to eat, get ready, and hope I wouldn't freak out and attack someone again.

I tried to convince Casper and Zeno to let me go again. "Look—" I blew a stray strand of purple hair out of my face. At least my hair hadn't changed color again, though now it was completely lilac instead of being a sort-of-lilac, red ombré color. "They're a whole bunch of vamps coming to pay tribute to their new queen tonight since they couldn't attend the official coronation. We can't cancel on them again. So I need you to untie me so I can get ready."

Casper shook his head. "Not going to happen."

I looked at him, then Zeno. Nope, they definitely weren't going to let me go. Shit. I looked down at myself. I was still wearing the sheet, thankfully, but they'd tied me to the chair with the...curtain cord? Well, it was the thing that kept the curtains away from the window. It was like a cord—whatever, it didn't matter.

Zeno started to speak to Casper in Arabic. I looked back up, but they were turned away from me. Okay, so I'd wanted to try this move for a while, but I'd always been way too scared. I sent up a small prayer and hoped it wouldn't backfire on me.

I opened my mouth and felt the acid in my body travel up my throat. I always freaked me out when I felt it, like goo sliding up. Tipping my head forward, I let it slowly trickle out of my mouth and onto the curtain cords. I wanted to clap when it actually worked. Yes, I could finally do something right!

I glanced up at Zeno and Casper but they were still busy. Zeno's hands were up and she was yelling at him. Casper looked bored, like he was humoring her. Man, they really did remind me of Bane and me.

The ropes dissolved, fell to the carpeted floor with a soft thud, and Casper and Zeno turned to look at me. Too little too late. I was free and behind the chair with my hands held up defensively. "Now wait!" I waved my arms as their fangs lengthened. They looked like they were ready to use vamp speed and jump me. "I'm okay now. I'm not attacking you or anything. I just have to use the bathroom."

Zeno's eyes practically sparked fire as her hands clenched and unclenched. "Kazaaba!"

I winced. That was one of the few Arabic words I knew. I'd finally asked Casper what it meant while I'd been shopping in City Stars with Samantha. 'Liar.' Zeno had called me a liar. Not that I wasn't, but still.

"Okay, okay. Hold up!" My wings brushed the wall, the feeling reverberated along my spine and right down to my butt. It felt weird. "You're both safe."

I watched Zeno shift and I forced my way into her mind. I will suffer my brother's wrath. It may take years, but he will forgive me. Oh no. Not good.

I jumped at the same time she pounced, and used all those fancy fighting moves Casper and Luther had taught me to get to the bedroom. I slammed the door shut a half-second before two angry vamps came barreling into it. The wood splintered.

"Hey!" I cried out, and hit the door with my palm. "We'll have to pay for that." More wood splintered.

"Fuck this!" I gave up on the door and ran across the room to the balcony. I really hoped these wings worked because if they didn't I'd crash to the ground and be a Peaches pancake. At least we weren't on the penthouse floor so the fall only looked like it might kill me.

I whirled as Casper and Zeno broke down the door and came in. Casper drew out the words, "Peaches, don't do it."

I pointed a finger at Casper's wife, "She'll kill me if I stay."

He held up his hands calmingly. "I won't let that happen." He took a careful step towards me.

I took an idiotic step back and hit my wings on the balcony railing. "Don't come any closer." Why did I sound like a B-movie star about to jump? Maybe Bane was right; I needed to stop watching so many movies.

"Look," Casper began, "I know you're scared."

"No." I narrowed my eyes and balled my fists. "You're scared. I've pretty much been like this from day one."

I didn't have to push into his mind to know that I was right. I'd been on the struggle bus the minute I'd died, and the only thing that had changed was that it finally broke down and I was now pushing it.

He threw out his arm to hold Zeno back when she looked like she was about to advance. Blue eyes looked at me streaked with red. "Don't you trust me?"

I shook my head. "That's not the issue here, Casper. It's the other way around." I looked between the two of them. "I am the same person I was yesterday. Nothing's changed except the cocoon and my wings."

"You attacked the witch," Zeno hissed, fangs scraping against each other. "You're dangerous."

I snorted. "Tell me something I don't know."

So here we were, at a standoff. They wouldn't attack me, and I wouldn't attack them. Well, that wasn't true. Zeno was the type of person to kill and ask questions later, and if Casper hadn't been holding her back, I was pretty sure she would have done just that.

I sighed. Vampires didn't really bend. I'd learned that one from Bane. We could stand here all night and they'd be fine with it. I, on the other hand, was used to bending and flexing to my situation. So I had wings, which meant I just had to find a really big coat to cover them with. Man, I bet that was hard to find.

I held up my hands. "I'm coming in, okay? No killing me."

I pushed into Casper's mind. He was warming to the idea that I hadn't changed but just adopted a new power like usual. I pushed into Zeno's mind, and thank goodness I did it then. "Casper, she's gonna—"

I watched Zeno lunge, but a few carefully annunciated words from her husband stopped her dead in her tracks. Her face paled and she started to shake. Holy crap, what had he said to her? Was he going to cut her off from buying expensive things? Nah, Zeno probably had rubies and gold up her ass and twenty times around the corner.