In the Land of the Rokken Ch. 02

I couldn't understand why I was so upset at leaving this dream. It seemed real yes, but it was still a dream. It was strange though that the second one seemed to run on from the first, with the same setting and the same women.

Julie was still looking at me, her face transparent in its concern.

"I'll be OK -- just a bit of a nightmare"

"Are you sure Nick? I've never seen you like this before. Up to now you seemed to be adjusting..."

She paused. I knew what she meant. Adjusting to being paralysed from the neck down, permanently in a wheelchair, unable even to pee or shit for myself.

I reassured her. "Yes. I'm OK"

Adjusted? Of course I wasn't adjusted. Who adjusts to being a fit 25 year old rugby player one day and a helpless cripple the next? Mentally I poured down fire and brimstone and every other sort of retribution on the drunk driver who had put me here. I had been out for my daily run. It was dusk, but I was wearing a reflective vest so should have been visible. The trouble was, the pathetic drunk had no lights on and probably wasn't even looking. The police report said he had so much alcohol in his bloodstream he would have had great difficulty in even sitting behind the wheel let alone driving. That was without the coke he'd taken in.

I suppose I was lucky. The insurance claim came through quite quickly. The drunk was your stereotypical waste of space living on daddy's allowance. They knew he was like that because they had let get him get away with it, so they didn't fight as hard as they might, although their insurance company were the usual bunch of heartless bastards. In the end though they came through and now, after a year in hospital and rehab I was due to go home -- but only if the doctors thought I could cope. I was actually worth as much in cash terms now as I was ever likely to have earned in a life time, so I had a new flat with all the adaptations I needed waiting for me and enough money to pay for 24 hour support. I didn't care though. I would have given it all away without a second thought just to move my big toe.

I suppose Julie saw all this passing across my face as I lay there. It was the only bit of me that moved and I was feeling a bit fragile what with the dream sex and all.

"I'm going to call Dr McPherson" she said. Inwardly I groaned, but said nothing. Dr Ingrid McPherson was my psychotherapist, but she was also one of the hottest, most gorgeous women I had ever met. It was when she came to see me for the first time and nothing stirred that I accepted what had happened to me. She was I reckoned, in her mid 30s, with long straight chestnut hair, a pale oval face and the most intense green eyes you have ever seen. Somehow she had been able to make me talk about absolutely anything and everything just by fixing me with those wonderful eyes. She generally wore the same style of clothing; a short jacket with tight trousers that accentuated a firm backside, each cheek clearly defined. It wasn't just me who noticed. I even saw Julie staring at Ingrid's rear one day as she was bent over the side table looking at my notes. She saw me watching her and blushed. I just lifted an eyebrow.

Inevitably in one of our sessions we talked about my loss of sexual function. She was very blunt and refused to sugar the pill.

"You know as well as I do Nick, that you have no chance of ever being sexually active again. I'm not being deliberately cruel by saying this, you simply must accept that fact if you are to cope psychologically. How you adjust varies from person to person. Some men look at porn. Others become mentally as well as physically celibate and turn away from all sexual imagery, sometimes even to the point of locking themselves away from women like a monk."

"I don't recommend either path. Full adjustment in my view means being in society and taking as full a part in it as you can within your physical limits. In your case your compensation package means that you will be able to do a great deal. Your youth and mental strength will help you enormously. Locking yourself away, whether in isolation or drooling over some bimbo with fake tits will not be good for you"

I said she was blunt!

With her help I had in fact begun to adjust very well. Being bathed, by Julie especially, was still a torture, but a big part of that was now frustration at not being able to do things for myself rather than anything sexual. This dream though had shaken me up badly. I knew that I suppose, so I did not object when Julie put in the call for Dr McPherson to come and see me.

Ingrid Macpherson came along just after lunch. She came in my room looking very serious, but hot as hell. For once she wasn't in her usual business suit, but a soft wrap around dress in pale green that emphasised full luscious looking breasts.

"Looking good, Doc! What's up?"

She ignored my lame joke and sat down opposite me. George had hoisted me out of bed and into my wheelchair. I hated it, but it was the only chance I had of moving around for myself, with chin activated controls.

"Julie says you were very upset this morning. She thinks you have had some sort of set-back. Tell me."

I knew her well enough by now to know this wasn't a request. I sighed and started to tell her my dreams. As I talked, she gave nothing away, although I thought I saw her eyebrows twitch slightly when I mentioned the prehensile penis. I told her too of my reaction when Julie had tried to comfort me, especially when she woke me the second time.

"Look Nick. You are a bright guy. I'm sure you have worked out by now that this sort of super athleticism in your dream is your sub-conscious mind trying to compensate for what has happened to your body. So is the extraordinary sexual prowess you describe. There isn't anything to worry about in my view -- you know this is a dream, it is the subject matter and vividness that is disturbing you. You should not worry about it. Your unconscious mind is just using ideas from books and films and making them over to fit your own situation. Have you seen the film Avatar?"

"Yes! Big blue monsters, one of them is controlled mentally by a guy..." My voice tailed off.

"Got it now have we? Look Nick -- you might have these dreams again, I don't know. Even if you do, it doesn't mean anything special. They will fade over time I'm sure, so don't let them get to you. Now, I'm off to my daughter's birthday party. I'll call back to see you tomorrow."

"Oh Doc, I'm sorry. I don't want to spoil your day, or hers. How old is she?"

"She's eighteen."

"Don't kid me Doc, that would mean you had her when you were 10!"

She smiled, then stood up.

"Don't be a silly bugger Nick. I was only 18 though."

I looked at her in amazement. "You had a child at 18 and still managed to get through medical school? You are some woman Doc!" I meant it too.

She patted my cheek, holding her hand against it for a brief second.

"I have to go. I'll write up a prescription to help you keep calm if anything happens, but only for use in extremis. OK?"

She raised her voice on the last and I realised she was more concerned than she was letting on.

"OK, Ingrid. I'll try my best to keep calm and not get freaked out like that again."

"I'll get you some books by Edgar Rice Burroughs as e-books. They have a similar theme to your dreams. You might enjoy them and seeing where the ideas are coming from should help."

With that she was off with a twitch of her skirt through the door. I heard her talking to someone in the corridor, then a girl's voice replying. Through the door as it closed I saw a young replica of Ingrid, but a little taller. She was stunning too -- slim with hair like Ingrid's lying loosely around her face, a tight top and a short tight fitting mini-skirt. She saw me looking and gave a brief smile before it closed on her.

I took in deep breaths to calm myself. Ingrid was right, I couldn't be a hermit and my brief excursions into porn on the 'net had not been helpful. Over the rest of the day, I gradually calmed down. I even dozed for a while without dreaming. Come night time though and I was starting to freak out again. If I has been able to move, I would have been tossing and turning in my bed. Eventually though I fell asleep. My night time meds included something that always made me sleepy and I couldn't stay awake.

It was with great relief that I woke up next morning without any memory of a dream. I felt fine and the dream memory was fading. I could remember it all, but the intensity of the memory had gone. When Julie came in to get me ready, I could tell she was relieved too. The rest of the day passed quite quickly. I had some new kit delivered that would allow me to use my computer much more easily with voice commands and I spent the day getting used to it and training it to my voice.

Late afternoon, Ingrid came back to check on me as she had promised. I teased her about her twin sister being outside waiting for her yesterday, which raised a brief smile from her, then we chatted a while as she probed my feelings and emotional state. I think I passed.

The next few nights were fine too. I had no dreams to speak of, certainly not about blue skinned hot babes, and I began to relax. Ingrid told me she was ready for me to be discharged to my own flat, once some carers could be recruited to give me 24hour cover. That was down to me. It was my money and I could appoint who I liked. Obviously they had to be able to cope with the basic tasks of care -- my arse wouldn't wipe itself -- but other things being equal I wanted people I might have been friends with in different circumstances. I was really surprised when Julie applied. I would have expected her to want to stay in nursing. She was intelligent and quick minded and could have gone far I thought. Even so I had no hesitation in offering her the job, then with her help I recruited three more to ensure 24 hour care.

By the end of the week I was in my new home. It took some getting used to, not just because I had never lived there before, but simply because it was so much better than I would otherwise have expected to live in at my age. My compensation not only covered loss of earnings for the rest of my life, but also a huge sum for the injuries. I was in fact a millionaire and since I was unable to blow it all on wine women and song I put a big chunk into making sure I lived in comfort. The flat was huge -- it had four bedrooms, three bathrooms and a huge open plan living area as well as an enormous outdoor roof garden, all fully accessible from my motorised chair.

Appointing Julie as one of my carers turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made. She quickly took on the job of ensuring I had all the care I needed at the right times and seeing how efficient she was I bumped her pay to make her my manager, with responsibility for handling everything to do with my continuing care. She also moved in permanently and soon became not just my care manager but a wonderful friend, who understood and tolerated my mood swings.

I didn't need to work but I knew, even without Julie's urging, that if I was to remain sane I needed a focus for my life, so I went back to university. I had already graduated in electronics, but that was now out as a career, so this time I started on a degree in Philosophy and Economics. The university was literally just around the corner and the building was fully accessible for my chair. Most of my texts were available in digital editions and Julie arranged scanning of those which were not.

I had a couple of months to wait before the start of term though and as we settled down into a routine the days became very hard to get through. With too much time on my hands I began to dwell on my situation again and became moody and to be honest a bit of a shit. Julie stood by me but two carers quit very quickly because of my behaviour. The others would have followed them were it not for her. She persuaded them to wait a week or so before handing in their notice, then came into my room and tore me off a strip, telling me in very blunt terms what I was doing to the people on whom I depended. So, slightly shaken by the realisation I could have been literally left on my own with no permanent support, I pulled in my horns and tried not to be so unreasonable.

Even so I was psychologically very low. I was sleeping poorly with vague disturbing dreams. Nothing so vivid as those I had while in hospital, but I would wake in the middle of the night feeling exhausted and with a terrible sense of dread. Lack of sleep didn't help my day time moods either, but I also began to suffer from narcolepsy, often falling asleep in the middle of a sentence, waking up a few minutes later with the same sense of unease I was experiencing at night.

The one night, the dream came back, as vivid and overpowering as it had been the first time.

He woke with a start. The cave was dark apart from the pale light coming from glowstones embedded in the walls. The Rokken woman and the girl still slept beside the pool, now huddled together for warmth. Something had disturbed him. He looked to the rear of the cave, making sure that he had missed no openings where animals might have hidden. Nothing. He looked to the narrow entrance. Something was coming. He seized his spears and sling his sword across his back before taking his stance ready to strike. As he watched he saw a large figure emerging into the body of the cave, built to the same heroic proportions as he was. He relaxed slightly. There were a few Heroes with whom he had a quarrel, but they were so far as he knew far away. The figure stood, revealing itself as female. She was clad like him in a short leather kilt and bare breasted. Those breasts were full and round but otherwise her chest was as muscular as his, as was the rest of her body.

"You are Varkan."

He stood erect before her, He had not donned his kilt so was fully naked. "I am Varkan, son of Kantar the son of Tarvil the son of Vilnar and I see you."

"I am Kren, daughter of Calda the daughter of Houda the daughter of Somma and I see you."

They clasped forearms. The exchange of names in this way was a declaration of trust, since the consequences of any betrayal could be visited on the betrayer's family. In this case, there was a more direct bond, as Vilnar and Somma had been of the same Clan.

"You have mated. With the girl or the Rokken?"

"The girl is not yet ripened. Since I was in Bloodlust, at the girl's suggestion I took the Rokken female. It was surprisingly satisfying. After that I spent myself in the girls mouth, since that was not a risk to her. Are you looking to mate? It would be pleasurable with you I think."

"I have not mated with a Rokken. I have heard it is done, but rarely with a male. I would not think they could sate a Hero. It would be pleasurable to mate with you I think, but it is not for Humans to see such a Holy ritual."

"I regret I cannot eject her from the cave, since she is the object of my Task. Once the night is over I will be returning her to her Clan for her Ripening ceremony. I am then to be her First so that she may be given in marriage. Our mating must therefore wait until then. Will you accompany me on my journey? It will be worth much credit to the girl to be accompanied to her wedding day by two Heroes."

"I will accompany you Varkan."

"Thank you Kren."

The two clasped forearms again, then turned towards the girl and the Rokken. The girl had been woken by their sonorous tones and was staring at them wide eyed.

Varkan spoke in formal tongue: "Alleyana of Clan Somma. I present your Kinswoman Kren, Hero of Clan Somma. She will accompany us tomorrow on our journey to your Marriage Day. I think you will gain much credit in your new Clan by being accompanied in such manner. It will more than wipe out the damage caused by your being taken by the Rokken. We can also attest that you remain unsullied by your ordeal."

Alleyana stood and bowed formally to the Hero Kren, who responded in kind.

"Kinswoman Kren, I will be eternally grateful for your attendance on me for the remainder of my journey. It will be indeed be creditable for me to be accompanied by two Heroes, but doubly so that one should be a Kinswoman."

"Kinswoman Alleyana, it will be equally creditable to me that I should be asked to accompany a Kinswoman to her Ripening and her Marriage Day. May the Gods make your Marriage long and fruitful."

The formalities exchanged, all relaxed into common tongue.

"Kren, you came into the cave during the night. How was that possible?"

"I saw Varkan kill the creature and enter its cave. I was close by. I followed you all in, but stayed close to the entrance as an extra guard. I knew he was in Bloodlust and needed to make sure you could not be taken by surprise. I was not aware then that you had not been Ripened or I would have intervened. Varkan says it was your idea he should sate his Bloodlust on the Rokken. I've heard of this but I haven't seen it done. How did you know it was possible?"

"My father says the Rokken are fallen Humans. According to the lore of my Clan they can mate with us and with many others of the People. If they lie with a Hero and fall with child, those children are fully Human. Other children are Rokken however."

"And how did Varkan find you with the Rokken?"

Varkan answered. "I had been summoned to the Clam Somma to escort Valleyana to her new Clan. I arrived as the Clan were attacked by Rokken. They took many women, but since I was charged with her safety I could only follow her captors. Once I have delivered her to the Darellan Clan, I will return and do what I can to find the others and if they are still sane, I will bring them back to their Clan."

He turned to Kren and reverting to formal language said "If you will accompany me on this Task it would do me great Honour. It is a Task I have taken on myself, not for others."

Kren responded: "Hero Varkan, it is I who would be given Honour, since this is my Clan and it is my duty to go in aid. You gain Honour by taking the task on your own accord. Together we will achieve much."

Again the two Heroes clasped forearms sealing the agreement.

As the heroes and the girl talked they were observed by the Rokken female. She gave every indication that she understood the conversation. Seeing her watching they turned to look at her. She stood up and faced them unafraid.

"Why did you not kill me with the others yesterday? You killed my mates. Was it simply to sate your Bloodlust? Am I now to die? Because if so I would only ask that you kill me in the light of Second Day, for we believe that while death at another's hand is no dishonour, if we die thus at night our soul is condemned for ever to wander alone without chance of rebirth."

"It is not dishonorable to kill Rokken, but it is not permitted to cast out any living creature into the night, even thought they have killed or kidnapped Humans. How though can you speak thus? The Rokken are but filthy grunting animals. "

"Not so as you can see before you. I was indeed filthy, until you My Lady Alleyana made me clean. I had some speech, but having received the seed of a Hero, it seems I gain other things with it. I can now speak in your own tongue, both formal and common. I choose the formal now because we discuss matters of life and death."

Kren intervened. "You are indeed right to choose the formal tongue for these matters, but it seems still more remarkable that you can speak at all. If this is indeed from the seed of a Hero, then this must be made known more widely."

"My Lady Kren, I do believe that is the source of my new ability. I have no clear memories at all before the Lord Varkan's member entered me. From then, my memories and sensations become ever clearer until the point at which he spent himself in me, when I became as lucid and rational as you or any others in this party."