It was An Amicable Divorce

"Anticipation." I repeated.

Then I reached for the top of her dress again. This time I didn't stop. I slid it slowly over her skin until I saw her nipples. I leaned down to kiss them, but she grabbed my head, lifted it, and kissed me.

"Anticipation." She smiled as she said it.

It took us another few minutes to undress. We did it slowly and seductively. We looked at, touched, and kissed every part of each other's bodies before we actually made love. And that's what we did. We made love. It was like coming home again. Every movement of my dick, every squeeze of her pussy. Every lap of my tongue and every suck of her mouth and we were where we were supposed to be.

Fuck what had gone before. This was here and now and I wanted it. We were on the tenth floor of the hotel. Our room faced a busy street, but we didn't care. After our first round of lovemaking, we went out onto our balcony with glasses of Champagne and sat, naked, as we watched the traffic below. Then we went back inside and made more love.

As she lay on her back, I moved up between her legs and slowly ran my tongue over, around and into her pussy. I nibbled her clit and sucked it into my mouth. She put a pillow over her face so only we could hear the screams. I licked and kissed my way up her body; taking my time and ensuring that my lips and tongue touched every inch of her. When I got to her lips, we kissed; softly and gently. Her body started to shake and tremble. I lifted my hips and she guided my dick to her pussy. I lowered myself and entered. Her shaking and trembling increased and I just lay there on top of her. When we started to move together, the old sensations returned. This was not her pussy. It was mine and I wanted it ... so I took it. Not hard or rough, but lovingly, tenderly, and slowly. We both knew who it belonged to.

Her hips started to rotate and move up and down. Each time she lifted her hips my lower body lifted as well. 'God, she's strong' I thought as she moved upward meeting my downward strokes. I could feel her muscles tightening around my dick inch by inch as it made its' way into her, then release it as it slid out only to repeat the motion time after wonderful time.

I was where I was supposed to be. I woke up with her nestled next to me. I smiled.

The drive home was like old times. We were young lovers again. I took her home but before I left, we fucked. Lovemaking was forgotten. Years of total absolute lust were erased in a matter of a few hours.

A couple of days later, Lisa came to our house for dinner. I had gotten steaks and shrimp to grill. As soon as Lisa walked in the house, the kids rushed to hug her. When Ruth got to her, she stopped and looked at her.

"You smell like my mother." Ruth told her.

"What?" Asked Lisa.

"You smell like my mother. She wore the same perfume."

Lisa looked at me with narrowed eyes. The rest of the meal instead of being a fun time was tense. The kids didn't notice, but I certainly did. Every time I looked at Lisa, she shot arrows back at me.

Finally dinner was over.

"I have to go," Said Lisa.

"I'll walk you to your car," I said.

I tried to hold her hand as we headed for her car, but she shook me off. I opened the door for her and she turned to face me.

"I thought it was me, but it wasn't. It was her. You didn't want me. You wanted her back. That's why you asked me about the perfume. You just wanted to bring back a part of her."

"That's not true. Of course I like ... no, I love that perfume, but you had it first. If anything, I may have been attracted to her because of you." She was in her car and gone.

A whole month went by and she wouldn't let me talk to her. She blocked my number and the couple of times I went to her house to try to talk to her, she wouldn't open the door. The one time I saw her at the mall she went the other way. The kids couldn't understand it and try as I might, I couldn't explain it.

One Saturday evening, the kids and I went to the movies. It was some 'girly' movie that Ruth and Kerry wanted to see, but Jake and I dreaded.

The movie hadn't started yet and the house lights were still up. "Isn't that Lisa?" Asked Kerry.

I looked and she was walking down the aisle to her seat. She was followed by a man who sat beside her.

"Yes, It is," I said.

"Can we go say hello?" She asked.

"I don't think so, sweetie."

The lights went down and the movie started. Whenever the light from the movie was bright enough, I looked where she was sitting. Once I saw them taking turns sucking through the same straw in a drink cup.

When the movie ended, we filed out. The girls were gushing and Jake was pointing his finger at his mouth and making gagging sounds.

In the lobby, Lisa and her date saw us. She came over and said hello to the kids. She never introduced her date and she never spoke to me. As they walked away, I heard him ask who we were.

"That's my ex and his family," she told him.

Life went on. Christmas break had just started and I was trying to finish my Christmas shopping. Mom, my brother and his family as well as my sister and her family were all taken care of. I still wanted to do more for my children so I was at the Mall walking around.

I found myself in the only men's store in the Mall. There were several stores for women, but only one for men. I was looking at the suits because mine were getting old and a bit worn. The sales clerk was walking around with me. I didn't need anyone to do that, but I didn't stop her. After I had seen all I wanted to see, I thanked her and started to leave. Lisa was standing at the big open door as I left. I started to just walk around her, but she spoke.

"Find something you like?"

"Why would you care?" I kept walking. She was close enough to me for me to know that she wasn't wearing Tabu.

"Would you like to talk?" She asked.

"I don't think we have anything to discuss." I said continuing to walk. "You said enough when you accused me of not wanting you, but wanting Connie back. If you want to talk, you can talk to your boyfriend."

"He's just a friend."

"A good friend, apparently. Good enough to share a straw with."

She was still a step or two behind me, but she caught up with me and grabbed my arm. "What are you talking about?"

I pulled free and kept walking. "I saw you at the movie using the same straw to drink your drink."

"He dropped his drink so we shared mine. What's wrong with that?"

"Casual friends don't do things like that. That's something close friends or lovers do."

She stopped walking. I didn't.

"What are you saying?"

"You heard every word I said. You're smart. You understand English." I had continued walking. She hurried to catch me.

"Are you accusing me of ..."

I stopped and turned to look at her. "Are you fucking him?"

"What?"

"Are you hard of hearing?"

"What right have you to ask me that?" When I asked her at the lake how many men she had dated since her divorce and had she fucked them, she answered with no hesitation, but now she was defensive.

"I have no right to but I thought we were getting to a place where ... Ah, fuck it. I have to go." And I turned to leave.

She grabbed my arm and stopped me. "I'll sleep with whoever I want to. Do you understand that? You don't own me and you never did."

"You're right. I never did. You always slept with whoever you wanted to; even marriage didn't stop you." I reached up took her hand off my arm and went home.

The kids and I had a very nice Christmas.

Matt and Rosa were invited to a neighborhood New Year's Eve party. They asked me to tag along, and in a move that was totally unlike me, I did.

We hadn't been there long, when Lisa and the man I recognized from the movie, showed up. I told Matt that I was leaving and told him why.

"Christ, Michael. Are you going to run every time you see her with somebody? Grow a set of balls, man, and get back in the game."

It was the best advice I ever had and I took it.

I grabbed a beer and started to circulate. Eventually, I was in a small group and we were joined by Lisa, who, apparently, knew most of them. They had no idea that Lisa and I had a history and we gave no indication that we knew each other.

"How's Timmy?" Someone asked.

"He's fine," Lisa answered. "He's over there grabbing a drink."

"Is he a 'keeper'?" One of the ladies asked.

I had not looked directly at her but I sensed she was looking at me so I looked back. Our eyes were locked on each other as she answered. "Probably. For someone."

She excused herself and walked away.

"They seem like a nice couple." Said someone in the group.

"Yeah, but something isn't right. Timmy is a bit frustrated. He likes her, but apparently she has some hangups and he doesn't know if it's worth the wait. He says she treats him like her brother."

"Hangups? Like what?"

"Like he's never been in her house. They've been dating for awhile now and he's never been in her house."

"Yeah, but I'd be willing to bet she's been in his often enough." One of the guys said and the men laughed. The women didn't.

"You asshole." Said one of the women and punched him on the arm. "You men are all alike. Didn't you hear what she just said? She said he was probably a keeper 'for someone'. That means she has no interest in a long-term relationship with him and is probably carrying a torch for someone else. That means she isn't sleeping with him, either."

"Oh, fuck. Unrequited love. The worst possible kind. I feel sorry for him." Said someone else.

"That doesn't mean he isn't fucking her." Added yet another person.

"She isn't fucking anyone. She's been my friend for a long time and we work together at the hospital. Every once in a while she goes on a crying jag and none of us knows why. I, personally, think it is her asshole ex-husband. She's still in love with him and he must treat her like shit."

"How do you know that?" I interjected.

"I don't for sure. But I do know that she has his picture in her work locker and, oh my God. It's you! You're her ex."

There was a general hubbub as they talked among themselves and stole glances at me. I left them and headed for my car. I passed Matt on my way out. "I'm leaving." I told him.

Lisa and Timmy were standing by the kitchen counter with another couple. Our eyes met as I passed them. I was almost at my car, when I turned around and went back. I walked up to them. She was just wiping her eyes.

"Excuse me, but I would like to talk to you." I said to Lisa.

"Why? So you can accuse me of fucking every man in town?"

"I just want to ask you a question." Pause. "Please?"

"Excuse me, Timmy. I'll be right back." We walked out onto the sidewalk. "This is far enough. Ask your question."

"Actually there are a couple of them. First: Do you have my picture in your locker at work?" She looked back toward the house. "Well?"

"Yes." She turned away from me.

"Why?" There was a long hesitation. "It's important, Lisa. Please answer."

She turned to face me. "Because I love you."

"Then why haven't you told me?"

"Because you're an asshole."

"Okay. I'm an asshole. But I'm an asshole who loves you."

Her eyes got huge for just a second then narrowed. "I don't know if I believe you."

"It's true."

"You accused me of sleeping with Timmy."

"I don't care anymore."

"I cheated on you and another man made me pregnant."

"That was long ago and far away."

"Once you forgive me, you can never bring it up and throw it in my face."

"I forgave you already."

There on the street she lunged at me like she did at her house. We hugged and kissed. Two cars drove by and honked their horns.

She put her hands on the sides of my face. "The last man I slept with besides you was the one I told you about at the lake; one of the three men I dated since my divorce. Timmy and I are friends. Nothing more. He wants there to be more, but I can't and never could."

We started back to the party. Timmy was standing in the doorway. We approached him.

"I'm sorry, Timmy," she said.

"I understand." He looked at me. "I suppose you'll be taking her home so there's no reason for me to stick around." He left.

The party took an interesting turn when Lisa and I walked in hand in hand. There was lots of whispering and pointing. When Matt saw us, he just started laughing.

We stayed for about another thirty minutes. At the stroke of midnight, we were in her bed doing our own stroking.

She became an almost permanent fixture in our house but she never spent the night and I never spent the night at her house; except, of course, those weekend nights when the kids spent the night at one of their cousins' house's.

Depending upon which shift she worked, Lisa and the girls often made dinner and Lisa usually stayed until midnight those evenings.

She was working nights and I had picked her up at work one morning after her shift and brought her to my house. It was a Saturday morning and the girls had breakfast ready for us. After the five of us ate, Lisa and I did the dishes. She stayed up for a couple more hours. I could see how tired she was so I took her to my room and told her to sleep for a few hours. I closed the door and turned to go back to the living room. Ruth was standing there.

"Do you love Lisa?" She asked.

What's it to you nosy?"

"Answer my question, Dad."

"Okay. Yes, I do."

"More than Mom?"

"Oh, goodness no, sweetie. It's a different love."

"Different how?"

"Let me see if I can explain it." I paused, took a deep breath, took her hand and walked down the hall to the living room talking as we walked. "Do you love your brother?"

"Of course."

"How about your sister."

"Don't be silly, Dad. Of course I do."

"How about me? How about your grandfather?"

"What's your point, Dad?"

"My point is that we can love many different people and that love takes many forms, but it doesn't mean we love one person more than another; it just means that we love them differently. Do you understand?"

"I think so. Man being grown-up is so gonna suck, isn't it?"

"Only if you let it." I laughed.

Lisa slept until early afternoon then spent the rest of the day with us. Late that evening I took her to the hospital so she could pick up her car and go home.

The next morning, I heard Ruth and Kerry talking before breakfast, but I couldn't make out the words. As usual, Jake was only interested in Breakfast. Ruth and Kerry came in to breakfast. Kerry spoke first."

"Are you going to marry Lisa ... again?" She asked.

"I would like to, but a lot of it depends on the three of you."

"Why us?" Asked Ruth.

"Well, if I ask her to marry me and she says yes, that means she would move in here and live with us."

"Would you sleep in the same bed?" Asked Kerry."

"Of course they would, goose. Married people always sleep together unless they're mad at each other, said Ruth.

"How in the world do you know that?" I asked.

"Dad," she said like I was the biggest dumbass in the world. "How many kids in my school do you think live with both of their birth parents?" I shrugged my shoulders. "Less than half. Don't they teach you stuff like that in College?"

"I must have missed that class." I fumbled through.

Little Jake piped up. "If you marry her and she lives here, does that mean she will cook for us all the time?"

"At least part of the time." I told him. "But we would have to do our share. She will be a wife and step-mother, not a housekeeper or slave."

"I'm good with that," he said. Ruth and Kerry echoed his sentiment.

The kids and I spent a week picking out a ring. I had thought about getting her old rings from the box in her room, but decided that this should be a new beginning with a new ring. The day we bought them, Ruth called her and asked her to come over. When she got there, the three kids ran out to the driveway and almost drug her out of her car and into the house. They took her to the middle of the living room and told her to 'stand right there and don't move'. Then they just stood there waiting for me.

"What's going on?" Asked Lisa.

"Dad wants to ask you something," said Little Jake almost choking with laughter, while his sisters tried to 'shush' him.

I was in my room trying to calm myself. I wasn't having any doubts about wanting to marry her, but one of her comments was giving me pause. 'Once you forgive me, you can never bring it up and throw it in my face.' That was true. My parents taught me that once you give a gift to someone you can't take it back and it isn't any of your business what they do with it. If they want to give it to someone else, they're free to do so. They also taught me what Lisa had told me. 'Once you forgive someone, regardless of what they did, you can't take it back and you can never bring it up so you better be sure you really want to forgive them.'

As Little Jake once said. 'I'm good with that'.

I walked into the living room and she was standing there looking at my three troublemakers wondering what was happening ... or maybe she knew, or at the very least, suspected. I found out in just a few seconds that she had no idea because the second I dropped to one knee, she fainted.

I never really did ask her, because as soon as she regained consciousness, she started saying yes, yes, yes.

The wedding was five months later. Her father gave her away for the third time. It was the second time he gave her to me. "I don't want to do this again." He said at the altar.

"You won't have to." I told him. "This is forever." I smiled as I looked at her and inhaled the almost 20 year old Tabu.