Jai and Malenna

The performance was a success and Malenna clapped and clapped. His enthusiasm was somewhat less. Despite that, he'd gained a grudging respect for a man who could extend one arm and balance a eighty or ninety pound woman on it while walking, to say nothing of the woman's stomach muscles required to hold her part of the pose.

Jai kept these thoughts to himself as he and his mother rode home in the taxi, rightly presuming they entirely missed the point of the evening. For she was breathless with awe and wonder in the presence of beauty; so was he but the beauty was hers. Her hand on his elbow throughout the night compounded it for him and distracted him. Sitting in their seats, she'd reached over and taken his hand and held it between hers, clasping it between both her hands on the sharp knee of her crossed legs. In the taxi, she sat looking out the window as the city rattled by, her hand resting on his knee. Jai couldn't move, didn't dare move lest she move her hand or she might notice his erection that felt like furniture too large to hide. He wanted to fidget but her hand stilled him and the sensation of its warmth on his knee fought with the urge to adjust his cock. He even thought of taking her hand and moving it to his crotch, to let her feel his response to her, a response that, now, manifested in the taxi but which he had restrained the whole night. Now he was hard and the throbbing tension roiled in him.

The taxi disgorged them at the corner and they walked to their apartment house, her hand again tucked inside his elbow. The dank night, not cooling much, hugged them. Malenna was silent until he realized she was humming, the tuneless sound that passed for her voice. It sounded like music to him. They arrived at the door and she waited while he opened it and escorted her inside. They went up the stairs to the door of their apartment. She waited while he dug for the keys, her hand moved to the small of his back, pressing against him gently. He dropped the keys. He stared down at them, hesitating to bend around his erection. She crouched easily and picked them up, handing them to him with an easy, relaxed smile. He had no idea that beauty could be so intoxicating.

He took the keys and opened the door. Inside, with the door closed, he closed his eyes, steeling himself for the action that would rouse her ire and get him slapped.

"Change. I want to slip into something more comfortable. I'll take the tux back to the shop tomorrow." Malenna's voice whispered.

He wondered if she was intentionally being sensual. He watched her drift back to her room and close the door. A huge quiver ran through him, like a chill that came with the sweat running down the middle of his back. He went into his room and stripped out of the tux, working around his erection. It did not abate. He stood in his underwear staring at it, feeling like it wasn't really his, that it was a new piece of furniture. He finally slipped on sweat pants, even thought it was summer, felt the heat of his body radiating and stripped them off. He couldn't get his mind to decide what to wear.

The knock at his door made him flinch.

"Jai, dear, would you like a drink?"

Her voice through the door made his heart thunder.

"I mean, I'm having a scotch, would you like one?"

"Yes, please." He managed. He listened but couldn't detect her moving away from his door. He imagined her standing there, listening to his heart echo around him, a hand on the knob considering the implications of opening the door on him and seeing him, cock at full erection tenting his tidy whiteys. He stood still, frozen, hardly daring to breathe. When the door didn't open, he exhaled a sigh like it was a material thing and pulled on basketball shorts. He stopped, looking at himself in the mirror. What if she wore something elegant and sexy? He'd look like the kid he was. The resolve to get thoroughly and soundly slapped collapsed. The basketball shorts were enough. He found one of his too-large tees and pulled it over his torso, pulling it far down over his waist, hoping it hid his erection.

He found his mother standing at the counter in the kitchen, staring down at two tumblers of scotch. She had an ice tray out and had popped the ice loose and was fingering the sharp cubes out of the mold with her colored finger nails, bright red. As he arrived behind her, she dropped one cube each into the scotch with a tinkling plop. He moved right up behind her, standing close enough to feel her heat and smell her hair. He leaned in and inhaled as silently as he could. His breath rattled in his throat.

"Jai?" Malenna turned in the spare circumference of her own body, facing him, looking up at him with the same blissful expression she brought home from the ballet. She put a hand onto his elbow, stretched up and kissed him lightly on the lips. Her body brushed against his erection.

A great shudder shook him, utterly out of his control, beyond his ability to stop it.

"Jai, you're shaking!"

He heard the wonder in her voice.

Here goes. He thought to himself. Her hand lay on his right arm. He put his left hand on her waist, leaned in and pressed his lips against her lips and stopped, waiting. Her reaction startled him. Her mouth opened and she breathed against him, her body shifted against him, pressing his cock back against his abdomen. He felt her tongue touch his lips. His hand moved to the small of her back and he held her against him.

She twisted her lips away from his.

"No. Jai, we mustn't." She whispered, but then looked up at him. She smiled, her eyes half-closed, peering up at him. When she made no move to withdraw from him, letting him hold her against her body, he kissed her again, tilting his head to fit his lips against hers. His heart hammered in his head, a percussion that made his chest ache. He pulled her tighter against him. For the briefest of moments, she let him, molding against him. He felt her body saturated with sensual energy settle against him. Just as quickly, she stiffened, turned her head away, brushing his lips with her cheek as she did so.

"No. Jai. No. We shouldn't." She whispered.

Still he held her. His hips pushed against her, pressing his cock against her body. She inhaled with a jerk and twisted out of his grasp. Without a word she left him staring at the unfulfilled drinks on the counter. He didn't even breathe until after her bedroom door closed.

"No slap." He whispered to himself, staring at the ice turning translucent in the amber liquid. He picked up one and drank it down. The burning made his eyes water. He set it down and drank the other. He looked around and suddenly he felt like an adult in his own home, perhaps for the first time in his life. He turned out the lights, checked the hall door and adjusted the thermostat as he'd seen his father do a thousand times and went to his room. He wanted a shower, to wash off the stink of his own nerves, to somehow get it out of his nostrils. He dared not make a sound, as though that would somehow erase the soft sensations of his mother's body pressing against him. His lips tingled with the feel of her velvet lips on his, and that brief zing of her tongue touching them.

Jai lay awake for what seemed like hours, reliving the moment their lips touched and wondering what it meant, what would happen next. Before he slept, his heart calmed but only when he told himself that he had to confront the swelling lust in himself, for his own good. He had to present it to his mother, to that woman that had leaned into him and let him pull her body against his. The decision reaffirmed, he had to get well and truly slapped. Having made the decision, he finally slept.

He woke to an empty apartment. Malenna left a note that she was at the shop, nothing else. Jai lounged till it was time to go to work himself in the afternoon, watching TV but with only half his mind and body present. The two empty tumblers sat on the counter. Each time he went into the kitchen, he stared at them, torn between wanting to leave them for her to see like two little monuments, to remind her of that moment they'd shared and wanting to erase that last sign. When he dressed for work, he saw the tux hanging on the back of his closet door and thought for a moment that he should take it to her at the shop.

He couldn't, he just couldn't. He washed up the tumblers and put them away, feeling like he was betraying himself somehow, like he was shying away from the firm resolution that had allowed him to sleep. He worked late into the night, volunteering to do the weekend cleaning in the warehouse that was always available as overtime. He got home at midnight, showered and went to bed. The apartment showed vestiges of Malenna's presence. His tux still hung on the hall closet door. He thought about tapping on her door to tell her he was home but even that was beyond his capacity at the moment.

Sunday repeated Saturday. He didn't see her. She was gone when he got out of bed. Off to work, he felt wooden, like he'd been poured full of cement and it was hardening but very, very slowly. He knocked over a pallet in the warehouse and got yelled at. He barely felt it, noting from some distance far away that where he usually would quake at being singled out like that, it barely touched him. Monday he worked his normal shift but went and played basketball, arriving home about nine tired and sweaty.

Malenna sat on the couch when he came in. He entered the living room and stopped. She sat with one bare knee bent up in front of her on the couch, holding a tumbler of scotch. She looked around at him, her eyes hooded, replete with calm that he did not feel.

"Are you too tired to rub my legs tonight?" She asked, so casually it felt like the last three days hadn't happened and didn't mean anything.

Jai knew then that he had been stalling, avoiding the confrontation he knew must come. He'd wanted to hold onto the right to put his hands on her body but now he realized he was stealing that and did not deserve it. He wanted to own that right to have her lust in his hands when he touched her, not her casual compliance. He wanted to touch the woman, not his mother. He wanted to have sex with her, to make love to her...to fuck her! The phrases growled in him, like imprecations from an animal.

"Jai?"

"Yeah, I can." He said. "Let me shower. I've been playing basketball."

"Did you eat."

He felt like she'd struck him, the motherly question rankled. He shrugged that off, staring at the silken lines of her bare leg.

"I did, yes." He said.

The shower was strange. Scrubbing as hard as he could, he still didn't feel like his body was real. He kept thinking of his hands on her ass, massaging the stiffness and soreness away. The thought wouldn't leave and neither did the erection that accompanied it. This was the moment. He knew it in his gut. He quailed. What if she ordered him out of the apartment. He had friends he could go stay with for a few days...these thoughts made his head throb and his gut hurt. By the time he dressed in shorts and tee again, he had hold of himself. His erection even softened a little, so he didn't feel as conspicuous walking into the living room, like his cock would arrive long before he did.

She wasn't there.

He walked back to her bedroom, pushing the door open. It was ajar.

Malenna lay across her bed. The short silk robe Suresh had brought back from the orient on one of his other trips came down to just below her ass. Her bare legs extended across the white of the bedspread, appearing browner and smoother than ever.

"I'm here." He said, his voice sounding odd to him. "You ready?"

Her head moved. He thought she nodded and took it that way. He sat on the bed beside her and worked on her feet for a while. Her first moan reassured him but then fear leaped onto his back and soaked into him when he took it as a good sign that this was the time. He was so torn, so horrified at the thought of destroying this shared experience, of his hands on her body and she relaxed and luxuriating in it, he could barely breathe.

Her calves seemed unduly tight. He worked on them, pushing the muscles against her tibia. When he turned around to work on her knees, pressing both hands up onto the backs of her thighs, she moved her legs, widening them. His hands worked into her large muscles, separating and squeezing them. He pressed both hands far up her thigh, stopping at the boundary of the robe draped just over her ass. He switched to the other thigh and repeated the motion, pushing his hands up to the robe. In all likelihood, his resolution would have quailed at the moment had she not reached back and pulled the robe up off her ass, encased in tight, silk panties.

Jai stared at her ass for a moment. He'd gone still, like he was witnessing a miracle of some sort and had to lock it into his memory lest his faith fail him in the future.

"I want you to work on my back too, please." Malenna whispered, flipping the robe higher, exposing the rippled lines of her lower back.

Jai couldn't tell if he was feeling what she was feeling or if the thundering tension was all his. He felt brittle, as if the tink of a hammer on him would shatter him into glass shards. His determination to press the issue, to present himself to her for her certain rejection and forever change their relationship swelled up in him, not unrelated to the return of his erection. Till then, the woman had lain across the bed. He grasped her legs and pulled her more diagonal on it, and took a position sitting across her knees. The feel of her bare skin on his made him gasp for air. The erotic thrill ran up his spine and exploded in his brain.

He focused on her thighs for a while. From time to time, his hands would shake and he'd think he was losing all the strength in them without ever touching her ass. Each time they steadied. He took that as a good sign. Finally, he let the long stroke on one thigh carry him up onto the swell of her ass. He changed sides and rubbed down the other leg. Back up on the same leg, he let his hands rest on her ass. His cock twitched. He couldn't breathe. He knew it was weird to just hold onto her ass like that so he forced his suddenly wooden hands to move, pressing down into her plush flesh, feeling it give.

Malenna groaned, a deep sound from behind her ribs that seemed to echo out of her body, not issuing from her lips. Her head was turned towards the head of the bed, her dark hair straggled over her face, hiding most of it, her eye and cheek but leaving her lips visible. Jai saw her lick her lips several times as he massaged her buttocks.

"Oh god, Jai." She whispered.

That she added nothing to the phrase made him think for a moment that what he was feeling, she felt as well. He had a vision of his hands under her underwear, pulling it down off her hips as a prelude to turning her over. He thought of separating the leaves of her robe, exposing her breasts and staring at her naked body framed on the bed while her eyes drank the elixir of his lust.

"My back, Jai. Do my back, please."

Her voice startled him. He complied, pressing his hands onto the bow of her lower back. He felt her muscles jerk and shift under the strength of his hands. He leaned over her, pressing his hands against her as he shifted up her bare legs. He stood on his knees, his hard cock just above his ass. This was the moment. He settled with his cock against her buttocks. She felt soft and hot against his cock. He wondered if she noticed it, his hard cock resting against her ass. He leaned forward, pressing his hands under the green silk robe.

She shifted onto her side.

Jai thought she was ending the massage but no, she took off the robe, fighting to get her arm out of the sleeve. He had a glimpse of her bare breast, in profile but clear full and alluring. He pulled the robe to the other side, tossing it to the side. She left it half on, leaving it on the arm that lay down beside her now bare torso. Surely she felt it! The amorous sensuality of the moment. Jai hooked his bare feet over her calves and leaned over her bare back, massaging up the spine to her shoulder blades and back down. Up and back, up and back, grinding out the tension in her muscles. Each time he leaned forward, his cock pressed against the swell of her ass. He could have lifted his ass so the pressure was not so certain but he didn't. This was the moment of truth, his resolution was strong.

"I have to make her slap me", he said to himself.

He shuffled forward until he was sitting full on her ass. He rubbed her shoulders and neck, even as his cock jerked and twitched against her ass.

Malenna moaned.

He dared not fantasize about why. He kept rubbing. He worked till his shoulders burned, as though all the tension he removed from her, soaked into his hands and ran up his arms to inhabit his back. He massaged her back and sides, letting his fingertips trace light lines near the swell of her breast under her chest on her right side. She lay with that arm under her face and the left one against her side, the robe still half on it. Finally, he sat back, resting his weight on her ass.

"I think I'm done. How does that feel?" He asked softly.

He felt her body twist under him and he automatically lifted up, shifting his weight onto his knees. He expected her to speak but not what she did. She shook her left arm free of the robe and turned onto her back. Her breasts appeared, the nipples sharp and tight.

Jai couldn't breathe.

He remembered Lana, how she responded when he took the initiative. If Malenna wasn't inviting him to act...he couldn't finish the thought. The woman lay with her arms over her head, exposing herself to him, waiting, eyes averted. Jai leaned over her and bent down. At first, he thought to kiss her breasts but then steered higher to her mouth. She turned her head slightly to allow his lips to meet hers. He kissed her, gently at first. Her lips were still, unmoving under his. He pursed his lips on hers a time or two and then he felt them soften and her mouth opened. He touched her lips with his tongue.

Her hands appeared on his shoulders, first holding him in place but then moving down to his chest and pushing at him. His hips pulsed, grinding his ass against her crotch. Her hands pushed harder at his chest even as her lips opened and her tongue touched him. He touched her tongue with his and then it all changed. She shook her head. Her hands pushed at his chest, forcing him to sit up.

"No. No, Jai. We can't. I, I can't do this..." Her voice failed her. Her right hand found the robe and pulled it over her chest, hiding her lovely breasts. "You should go." She didn't look at him. Her eyes were cocked to the side, avoiding him and what must have been a stricken look on his face when she spoke her command. It didn't sound like a command. It sounded more like an observation. He almost stayed. Almost, he defied her but no, he rose up and lefter lying on her bed, nearly nude, eyes turned away from him. The only comfort he took from that picture was that she was obviously panting.

Back in his room, he cursed himself. He should have been forceful, pressing the moment. God, how he wanted to feel her nipple on his lips. He waited for his swollen cock to relax and then got ready for bed. When he'f left her, he'd stopped at the door of her room, hesitating, hoping she'd call him back. She didn't move. She lay with an arm over her eyes, the robe covering her torso and her hair splayed about her like a beautiful spill on the white bed spread, her pussy clearly visible in the tight white of her panties. He'd closed the door and left her on the bed, a woman in anguish, the emotions clearly etched on her austere face. After brushing his teeth and the rest, he lay down, certain he'd never sleep. He was wrong.