Joan of Snark Ch. 05

As Joan climbed into bed, she thought about Father Ben and Lil. She felt like a fool for being so naive. Of course a man as handsome as Father Ben would probably not remain celibate. And who could blame him? With a gal pal as attractive as Lil constantly touching him and fawning all over him. It was only natural that sooner or later he would break his vows.

But then why had he chosen to become a Catholic priest? He could have converted to another Christian denomination and become a reverend or a pastor. Most protestant ministers were able to have girlfriends and get married. Not that Joan cared about Father Ben maintaining his chastity - she was an atheist after all. But Father Ben was a hypocrite. He had no business wearing the clerical collar and telling people to address him as 'Father.'

Joan cringed when she thought about how she had apologized to Father Ben for kissing him and coming onto him. She had no doubt that he and Lil were probably fucking each other's brains our at that very moment. But not before having a good laugh at Joan behind her back first.

And to make matters worse, she was scheduled to work at the rectory the very next evening. She would be required to cook dinner for the the young priest and his female guest. Joan shuddered with disgust at the idea of the two of them touching and petting and cuddling with each other. And she would be forced to watch their affectionate displays of "friendship" as she served the two of them their dinner and cleaned up after them. As Joan switched off her bedside lamp and pulled up the covers, she seriously considered quitting her part-time job for real this time.

As she lay in the dark unable to sleep, an creepily familiar sound caught her attention. Her body stiffened as she listened to the noise outside of her open window. It was the unmistakable call of an owl hooting. Oh no, Joan thought to herself. The owl from the church did not follow her home, did it? I'd better close my window, she silently decided.

However, when Joan went to throw back the bed covers, her arms would not move. When she attempted to swing her legs out of bed, the muscles in her caves and thighs refused to comply. She tried to sit up, but her torso remained locked in position. She could not turn her head. She could not mover her fingers. She could not wiggle her toes.

Okay, Joan thought. Remain calm. It's no big deal. This is obviously just sleep paralysis. There's no reason to get upset, she said to herself.

The only part of her body that she could move was her eyes. To the best of her ability, Joan scanned the room. She glanced over to the window. Much to her relief, there was no owl from what she could see. Maybe the hooting she heard had been a hallucination. Maybe there was no owl outside of her window, Joan considered optimistically.

She moved her gaze from the window over to her open closet. There was nothing there except for a pile of dirty laundry on the floor. Of course there's nothing there, she thought. What had she been expecting to find?

It was not so bad, she just needed to wait it out. From what Joan had heard, sleep paralysis usually only lasted a few minutes. But then again, a few minutes could feel like an extremely long time when you had no control over your body.

As Joan's eyes drifted over to the left hand corner of the room, it appeared empty at first, just as she had suspected. However, as Joan looked down to the floor, she could see, peeking out from the darkness, a pair of feet. Bare feet with painted toenails.

Joan thought she felt her heart stop. She could feel the blood drain from her face. It isn't real, she told herself. There's nothing there. It's just a mirage. This is just one of the side effects of sleep paralysis. Don't be scared. There's nothing to be afraid of.

The feet began to move. First the left and then the right, they glided across the floor. Step by step, a figure emerged from the unlit corner. It was a woman and she was nude. Her thick hair loosely hung down in long waves over her shoulders. Her pale skin reflected the moonlight coming in through the window. A thatch of downy auburn hair was nestled between the tops of her thighs. Her breasts were round and full. The peaks of her light rose nipples were pointed. They seemed to be pointing at Joan as the woman approached the bed.

Joan's mind was racing. She was trying not to panic. She just kept saying over and over to herself, it's not real. It's not real! It's NOT REAL!

Joan had read articles before about sleep paralysis. Logically she knew that she was experiencing a very common hallucination. Seeing a shadowy figure next to the bed was not a unique occurrence for sufferers of the condition. Rationally, she knew it was nothing to be afraid of. No one could be physically harmed by an unconsciously created phantasm. But actually seeing it first hand was a completely different and terrifying experience, versus simply reading an article about it.

As the unclothed woman stepped nearer to the window, the silvery moonlight illuminated her face. Her beautiful face. She turned to Joan and smiled. Her green eyes twinkled.

Oh for christ's sake! Even during sleep paralysis, I have to be tormented by fucking Calla Lily! This is just perfect, she thought bitterly. However, she found some small comfort in reminding herself that it was just a figment of her imagination. And that, in a moment or two, the image of Lil would soon vanish. This figure of Lil standing by her bed was not actually there. Joan lay silent and motionless as she anticipated Lil's inevitable disappearance. Patiently she waited. And waited. And waited.

But Lil did not disappear. Instead she moved closer. She stood at the foot of Joan's bed, grinning down at the incapacitated girl, making Joan inwardly shudder. Lil bent forward and placed her hands on the bed, on either side of the Joan's legs. Joan felt the lower half of her mattress sink down. Was that part of the hallucination? She tried to cry out, but she could not open her mouth. She could not activate her vocal cords.

Lil moved forward, bringing her knees up one by one onto the bed. The bed frame creaked and the springs squeaked as Lil crawled up towards the headboard. Her plump breasts swung freely. Joan noticed that she had a small dark brown mole just above her right nipple.

Lil straddled the younger woman between her long lean legs. She brought her face very close to Joan's and looked into the girl's wide terrified eyes. Then, ever so gently, she planted a soft kiss on Joan's lips. It was the same cool dewy sensation that Joan remembered feeling on her cheek earlier that evening.

My subconscious is simply using my past experiences and memories to create the details of this hallucination, Joan told herself. It isn't real. It can't be real.

Lil shifted down slightly and took the top of the sheet and duvet lightly between her fingers. Slowly, she pulled down the covers, revealing Joan's simple blue nightgown. The marian colored garment came down to about mid-thigh. Lil placed her hands on the sides of Joan's knees and slid her fingertips up and down the outside the young girl's legs. Joan's stomach did a somersault.

If this was a trick of the mind, then why did everything seem so real, Joan wondered.

The unclothed older woman leaned forward, tilted her face up and placed a kiss on Joan's neck, in the hollow of her throat. Joan was not imagining things. She could FEEL it. It was tactile and tangible. It felt real.

Lil slowly rose up, sat back on her haunches and looked down at Joan. She studied the girl's youthful face for a moment. Joan had no choice but to wait and see what Lil would do next. She rubbed Joan's shoulders and then brought her hands to the girl's bare neck. She caressed Joan's throat with her fingers. It would have almost felt good, had Joan not been so frightened.

As Lil stared down at the motionless younger woman, her lips curled into something resembling a smile. Her fingers stopped moving for a moment as she simply rested her hands around Joan's neck. Joan's heart was beating wildly in her chest. She was not sure, but she thought she could feel Lil applying pressure with her long fingers, which were wrapped around Joan's throat. The pressure increased. Lil's grip became stronger. She squeezed harder.

Was this real? Did Father Ben put a drug in Joan's glass before pouring her wine? Was that why she could not move? Was Lil going to strangle her?

However, Lil released her neck and slid her hands down to Joan's chest. She reached for the top button on the plain nightdress and unfastened it. Then she did the same to the second button. And the third. And the fourth. Before long, Joan's dowdy blue nightgown was completely undone. Lil raised her left eyebrow and, with a sly smile, cocked her heard to the side. She stared down at Joan with an inquisitive expression.

At long last, Joan was finally able to regain control of a few of her muscles. She found that she was able to move her head. And she was able to open her mouth. Without thinking it through, Joan found herself affirmatively nodding her head. She parted her lips and, before she knew what was happening, Joan whispered the word, "Yes."

Lil grinned and parted Joan's nightgown, uncovering the younger woman's olive toned skin. Joan's pert breasts moved up and down as she took slow shallow breaths. The cool summer breeze crept in through the window and tickled her nipples. The skin of her areolas began to scrunch. Lil lowered her head and brought her lips to Joan's right breast. She wrapped her lips around the girl's teat and swirled her tongue around the stiffening point. Joan emitted a very low groan as Lil gently suckled on the sensitive point. Joan felt a strange feeling in the pit of her belly as her clitoris began to tingle. Lil then brought her lips to Joan's right nipple and sucked the little nub into her warm wet mouth.

It's not real, Joan reminded herself. There is no one here right now. There's no mouth on my tit. And I certainly did not nod my head and say, "Yes," to this woman, Joan told herself. This is all just an illusion, she vehemently stated in her mind.

Lil's red velvety tongue flicked the tip of Joan's right nipple. Joan let out a slight yelp. Lil sat back, reached down and cupped Joan's modest bust. She then brought her thumbs and forefingers to the teenager's nipples and rolled around the sensitive nubs. Joan softly moaned. Lil then increased the pressure. She gave Joan's nipples and sharp pinch. "Ah!" Joan squawked as Lil smirked.

Lil removed her hands from Joan's chest. Leaning forward she placed them on the bed, on either side of the girl's head. She brought her face close to Joan's. She looked into the adolescent's big brown eyes. With a fixed gaze, she studied the fearful girl. As Joan held her breath she could feel her heart palpitate. She could have sworn it skipped a beat as she was forced to stare into the face of the apparition. She could feel Lil's chilly breath blowing on the skin of her face.

Why was Lil doing this? What on earth did she want? But then the teenager had to remind herself that Lil did not want anything. Because this was not really Lil. It was just her mind playing tricks on her.

After a few more moments of uncomfortable eye contact, Lil began crawling backward until her hands were next to Joan's upper thighs. Her fair face hovered over Joan's hips. Lifting her left hand from the bed, Lil combed her fingers through the dark curls between Joan's legs. The younger woman flinched as her eyes widened. What was Lil doing?

Lil put both of her hands on Joan's inner thighs. She gave a subtle but assertive nudge. Joan should not have been able to move due to sleep paralysis. But she somehow found the ability to move her lower body. She obediently parted her thighs and opened her legs up wide. Lil softly laughed as she looked up at Joan with an approving smile.

I didn't just do that, Joan told herself. You can't control what happens during a hallucination. It's not my fault, she thought. This is all the creation of my subconscious mind.

Lil slowly and lightly stroked the lips of Joan's sex, making the teenager shiver. She slid her fingertips between the folds of flesh until she found the turgid little pearl peeking out near the top of Joan's labia. "Oh!" Joan gasped as Lil gently ran her finger up and down over the small rigid kernel. Somehow Lil knew just the right amount of pressure to apply. Joan closed her eyes and inhaled deeply as the other woman caressed her most intimate place.

Perhaps sleep paralysis was not so bad after all, Joan mused as her clit pulsated with mounting pleasure. If this was what a hallucination felt like, maybe fears about the disorder had been overstated.

Joan let out a quiet whimper of disappointment as Lil removed her finger from her flesh. However, the alabaster beauty soon replaced her fingertip with her skillful wet mouth. Taking Joan's clitoris between her lips, Lil sucked the throbbing little bud between her teeth and ran her tongue all over the head of the clitoral head.

"Oh!" Joan cried out. "OH!" Was she actually making noise in real life? Or were Joan's noises and actions also part of the hallucination? Was this even a hallucination? Or was this instead a dream? Joan had no way of knowing. All she did know was that Lil's mouth was bringing her closer and closer to climax.

As Lil's agile tongue swept over Joan's sensitive glans, the younger woman arched her back. Her fingers clawed at the sheet covering her mattress. "Oh god! Oh christ!" she moaned.

Giving Joan's clitoris a few more sensual licks, Lil then dragged her tongue downward and slid it into the girl's slick tight opening. Joan flinch at this new sensation. But the change was not unwelcome as Lil lapped up Joan's fluids.

As Lil licked and sucked Joan's moisture into her mouth, Joan began to feel a little light headed. As the other woman drank in Joan's wetness, the younger female began to feel oddly weak. It was not just the fact that she could not move. She started to find it difficult to breath. She went from feeling cool to feeling uncomfortably warm as Lil continued to suck the juice from her young orifice.

Joan could feel herself beginning to lose consciousness. As Lil drained Joan's sheath of its moisture, the older woman also seemed to be draining the life out of Joan through her cunt. Joan attempted to inhale, but she could not take in air. Oh no, this isn't good, Joan silently observed. Her vision began to bur. What's happening, she anxiously wondered as she could hear a rushing sound in her ears. Everything started to go black. Could a hallucination kill you?

As Joan was slipping into unconsciousness, she could barely make out a distant sound coming from ... somewhere ... It sounded like a crow. The sound gradually got louder and louder until it seemed as though the bird was in her room.

Abruptly Lil withdrew her tongue from Joan's feminine passage, raised herself up and sat back on her heels. Joan opened her eyes and inhaled a loud raspy breath. The teen tried to summon the strength to sit up or move her arms. But once again, the only body part she could control was her eyes.

Lil turned her head to the side to look at the window. There was a crow perched on the sill. It loudly cawed several times. Lil seemed to scowl as she narrowed her eyes.

After taking a few more breaths, Joan found she that was capable of some slight movement in her arms and torso. Mustering up as much power as she she could, she sat up, thrusting out her hands and arms to push Lil off of her.

"Get away from me!" Joan screamed. "Get the hell off of me you bitch!" she hollered at the top of her lungs. "You fucking psycho! Are you trying to kill me?" She tried to shove Lil off of her, but her efforts were futile. For some reason, she could not quite seem to make contact with the woman sitting near the foot of her bed.

Suddenly the bedroom door swung open and the overhead light switched on. "Joanie, what's going on in here?" Joan's mother came rushing into her room dressed in yellow and white striped pajamas.

"Help!" Joan cried. "Get her away from me!"

"Who?" Joan's mother asked as she frantically looked around the room.

"The woman!"

"What woman?"

"The woman who ... the woman ..." Joan opened here eyes. She was laying flat on her back. She panted as she looked up at the ceiling.

"Joanie, what are you doing?" Her mother looked at her with stern disapproval.

Joan looked down. Her nightgown was buttoned all the way up to the top . But it had been hiked up to her waist, leaving her lower half naked. Joan's right hand was covering her crotch. Her first two fingers were resting on her clit.

Joan immediately snatched her hand away from her groin. She quickly raised up her hips and clumsily pulled her nightdress back down. "Mom, there was a woman here! She was attacking me. I think she was trying to drain all of my energy out of me!" Joan explained in a trembling voice.

"Joan, you were dreaming about a woman. And you were touching yourself." Her mother made no attempt to hide her distaste.

"Oh Mom, I'm not a lesbian! So you don't need to worry. But that woman who was here. She was ..."

"Joan, look around. There's no woman. You were having a nightmare."

As Joan tried to calm down, she glanced around her bedroom. She could not see anyone else except for her mother. Her nightgown had not been unbuttoned. Even her window was closed. It had all just been a bad dream, she tried to convince herself.

"Joanie, maybe you need to see someone."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you woke up this morning having had a nightmare. And now this. Maybe you should think about starting counseling again," her mother suggested. "You know, I don't think you really gave it a fair shot before. When your father first died ..."

"I don't need counseling, Mom!" Joan interrupted her mother. "I just had a bad dream. That's all. I thought it was real for a second. But now I can see it was a nightmare. Everyone has nightmares from time to time."

"Well Joanie, it wasn't just a nightmare. You were also ..." She looked down to Joan's lap.

"I was what, Mom? Masturbating?"

"Joanie, don't say that!" her mother snapped.

"Everyone masturbates, Mom. It isn't a big deal."

"Does everyone masturbate during a nightmare?" her mother pointed out.

Joan had no comeback. All she could do was glower at her mother.

"Listen Joanie, I just think it would do you some good to talk to someone. It's too bad Father O'Connor is in the hospital. I'm sure he could have given you some spiritual guidance."

Joan rolled her eyes at the idea of asking the miserly old priest for life advice.

"What about the substitute priest. What's his name?"

"Father Ben."

"What's he like? Could you talk to him about your feelings?"

Joan thought about it for a moment before replying, "I don't know, Mom. He's pretty busy taking care of the parish."

"Oh? Well part taking care of the parish means counseling and advising his flock. And with you working at the rectory, I don't see any reason why you wouldn't have a chance to speak with him."

"He seems to have his hands full at the moment with a guest he's hosting from out of town."

"Oh? Well, that's a shame. But I'm sure it won't be long until Father O'Connor is once again as right as rain. They're probably taking very good care of him over at the hospital. He'll be back at the parish soon."

Joan wondered if Father O'Connor treated the hospital staff as badly as he had treated her.

"Mom, I have school in the morning and I'd really like to get back to sleep."

"Alright Joanie. But please think about what I said."

"Fine," Joan muttered.

Joan's mother turned off the light and exited the room, shutting the door behind her.