Kiss My Apocalips Ch. 04

"Pleased to meet you, Sadie," I answered, looking for her in my rearview mirror and seeing only a sliver of her face.

"He has a really big cock, too," Sofia said. Wanda tried to stifle a horselaugh.

"You've seen his cock?" Sadie asked.

"Yeah. Last night. We didn't do anything, though."

"Why not?" Sadie asked.

Wanda dissolved into a fit of mirth.

We had to drive right past the community center where we'd started this chase after the town meeting. It looked like things had pretty much broken up, and those that were left were heading home. I didn't slow down, and sped in the direction where I thought the action had shifted. Years ago, I'd ridden my bike everywhere in this town and I knew it like the back of my hand.

There was a lone police car in front of the mayor's house. A man in a deputy's uniform was talking to a guy in front of the house on the lawn. This man was holding an 9-mm automatic handgun. I pulled the pickup to a stop not far from them and ordered the girls to stay down, which they fortunately did. Getting out, I stayed partially behind my open door; a tip I took from the deputy, who was doing the same thing.

"Come on, Sam!" the deputy yelled. He sounded desperate. "The sheriff is going to be here any second! There's no way he's going to let you leave here!"

"Yes," the armed man said confidently, "he is. We're just waiting for Roland to get here, and you're going to let us drive away. Just like that."

"Roland's not coming," I hollered. "Neither is the girl. In fact, both the girls you kidnapped and raped are safe and sound; which is a lot more than I can say for your brother."

The man swung his raised gun to point in my direction. "I know you!" Sam bellowed. "I've seen you around town! You're sort of hard to miss. And you make an awfully big target! You'd be hard to miss that way, too!"

"Oh!" I shouted back. "That was a joke! Nobody's ever made a joke about my size before!"

"Shut up! You don't know jack shit! Roland will be here!"

"One of those little girls you were holding in that house picked up a gun and blew Roland's head off" I quipped. "Quite literally, I might add."

Several things happened then. They happened very quickly, but I'll try to list them in order for the benefit of the reader. Good old Sam fired his handgun, and almost simultaneously the truck door I was both holding and hiding behind gave a violent jerk and issued a noise that sounded like some kid had hit it with a baseball bat. A two-inch in diameter hole appeared in the door's edge, next to my hand.

Next in our series of connected events: Sam reacted in a very peculiar manner. It was as if someone had tied a rope to the back of his belt, then had a hundred of his friends all pull at once on the other end. Sam went flying backwards, butt-end first, while his arms and legs trailed along behind him. The gun in his hand was left momentarily in mid-air during this little demonstration. Then, at that precise instant, I heard the bang of a big-ass gun behind me. It dawned on me finally that the bullet that had done this had moved much faster than the sound of that "bang."

In the following second, I turned around and looked the other way. I did that for two reasons. First of all, the big-ass bang had sounded behind us, and it's just natural for someone to turn and look. Secondly, there were two lovely girls sitting in the back seat, and I didn't know what mischief Sam's bullet might have gotten up to once it had passed through the edge of my door.

About fifty yards away, I saw a large puff of smoke, which slowly blew to one side in the wind. However, I couldn't really see what had made it. An examination of the black truck showed that Sam's bullet had made a groove in the side, back near the left taillight, but had not further penetrated the vehicle. Still, I mentally kicked myself for bringing the girls into the line of fire.

Back toward the house, Good Old Sam was lying in strange, unmoving heap about ten feet closer to the house than he had been standing moments before. He was lying more or less on the back of his neck, arched over backward, so that his legs were on top. He looked as if he had attempted a backward somersault and gotten stuck halfway.

Doriana walked up from behind me carrying the massive M-24 rifle in both hands.

"I guess this thing works," she told me matter-of-factly.

TO BE CONTINUED