Lays of St Trinian's Ch. 06

The thing I had not expected about our trip to Hollywood was, well, everything. I had rather thought we'd be overwhelmed by it all, and not at all considered the possibility it might be blown over by us.

It was all the fault of that grating, how were we to know it was an air vent?

We all felt a little weary after the flight, although Lady Sonia's private jet was as comfortable as could be. As we flew into LA International, most of the girls freshened up. But Emm, unable to decide which of her many dresses to wear, decided to keep one of what she called her 'posh frocks' on. It was a wonderful floaty number, low cut and flaring from her tiny waist. I looked quizzically at her.

'Well Pix,' she said, I don't want to disappoint the Press.'

When Miss Mons wondered whether we might be disappointed, given that Emm was a newcomer, Miss Susie tapped her nose, winked, and told her not to worry. Alicea giggled. As she was our Press Liaison Officer, that sounded reassuring. Moll Flanders and Angie Sinn, as our American guides to all things American, reassured us that our 'cute English ways,' would go down well. Angie, who had clearly talked with Miss Susie and Alicea, was so busy texting that I was sure that something was being planned.

And as we exited the plane there was indeed a Press posse, with cameras snapping as Emm came down the steps. Alicea guided her to what she said was the best place for photographs, warning her not to get her heels caught in the grille. Angie, her boobs also a magnet for the photographers, helped Emm find the right pose.

As Emm pirouetted and pouted, the Press guys asked her to lean forward, but Emm was too experienced a hand to be caught that way. But even as she struck the pose disaster struck. A great gust of hot air shot up and pushed Emm's dress above her waist in the classic Monroe style ... except Monroe was wearing panties.

Emm's pudenda were snapped by everyone, and made the Prime Time bulletins and the evening edition of the papers. Of course, Emm could have tried to hold her skirts down, or, once they had risen, she could have pulled them down, but as she said to the Press Pack:

'It's all on show in the Movie guys, and it isn't as though there's anything the film goers won't have seen.'

By the time we had cleared customs, two Republican Senators had demanded Emm's deportation, and the leaders of the Southern Baptist Confederation had demanded that the film should be banned, advising all its members to boycott cinemas showing it. The leaders of the Alliance of Evangelical Churches had denounced Emm as the whore of Babylon, with one Pastor telling the LA Times that it was a sign of the Second Coming. By the time we had cleared Customs we were front page news, and the lead story on the nightly news bulletins.

Leading Alt-Right commentators had Tweeted that this was a sign of the filth that Hollywood was enmeshed in, and demanded that abortion should be banned, though, as Miss Susie commented:

'What the fuck one has to do with the other, fuck knows!'

As we reached the hotel the Press were in full cry.

'Emm, Emm, have you got a comment for us? This way, Emm, hey, this way!'

The scrum was intense, and the helpful attempts by Julie and Annie to distract attention by, as Julie out it, 'getting our tits out for the Press,' made matters worse. Miss Sinn's stocking tops, clearly visible through the thigh-high slits in her dress, also drew attention. I thought, as Laura did, that Moll was correct when she said:

'This is meat and drink to them. It could not have been planned if they had tried.'

Quite so. Miss Susie and Angie winked at Alicea.

By the time we reached our rooms, Miss Susie had been asked for interviews on three of the major Networks Prime Time shows, with Emm in tow.

If the Right had got in first, then that was followed by a tremendous backlash on Twitter.

#Emmtoo, and #Emmscunt, were trending as the top two Twitter hashtags by six o'clock.

'That, Alicea, was even better than we could have hoped,' I heard Miss Susie say.

'It will help with the other matter, I have a call into the producers of the Oscars, and they are expressing an interest, I think Julie and Annie helped.'

Miss Susie smiled.

'Hoffy, it is fucking brilliant, order some bubbly, on Lady Sonia's tab, so make it good.'

'But Miss Susie, if you are going to be on television?'

'I will need to be pissed, look what it did for Peter O'Toole.'

Laura kindly ordered some Dom Perignon, and when I say some, I mean a lot.

Quite why Angie felt the need to don a sexy maid's outfit to serve the champagne, who knew? But it was such an expansive gesture and, as Laura commented, spoke volumes about her relationship with the girls. Moll preferred a less ostentatious style of service, but made shy young Ann very happy with her efforts to put her at her ease by sucking her toes. For those with a short attention span, Mons was offering oral satisfaction while they watched television.

Miss Natalie, who was watching with interest, commented that there seemed to be some role confusion between the teachers and the students, but as Laura commented, teaching was all about passing on knowledge and setting examples.

As they played and drank, there was a knock on the door and there, be still my beating heart, was our dear Head Girl, Rebecca, who, after a fashion-shoot in Las Vegas had decided to meet with us.

'So, what on earth is going on? Half the world's media seem to be camped outside the Hotel.'

Miss Susie beckoned her over, and welcomed her back with a long, lingering kiss. Thus inspired, I kissed Laura. Alicea launched into an impromptu version of 'Love is all around us,' which Julie, Annie and Emm joined in, with Angie, Moll and Mons doing a wonderful backing chorus. Young Ann was too shy to sing, but smiled prettily.

But alas, this happy atmosphere was broken up by a call from Reception. The car had arrived to take Miss Susie and Emm to the studio. I wished them well, and Mons added, impeccably:

'You who are about to die salute us.'

Miss Susie looked at her oddly.

'I'll deal with you later. Kisses Hoffy, enjoy.'

And with that they swept off.

'Miss Hoffmann,' said Alicea, 'I got it!'

Rebecca hugged her:

'You clever. clever thing, did the guy whose named I gave you pull it off?'

I looked puzzled.

'It's okay Hoffy, Alicea told me what was going down, and that helped get the producer of the Oscars on side. He was at the Vegas fashion-shoot. And guess what?'

Belles seemed beside herself with excitement, although with Julie beside her, there might have been another explanation.

'Miss, she's only gone and blown the bloody doors off!'

I looked puzzled, again.

'Belles and the "St Trinian's Banned" will be playing the Oscars.'

Monica squealed with delight, and Laura kissed me so passionately that I almost passed out.

'Oh, my, fucking, goodness,' exclaimed Alicea, excitedly showing Annie her phone.

'Do you need some sexy dancers,' asked Angie, 'me, Moll and Mons will do it.'

Young Ann kept her mouth shut, but as Natalie observed, she'd have to open it at some point.

At that precise moment the television flashed the latest news along the bottom of the screen, it read:

'POTUS invites Emm to a private meeting.'

That was what had excited Alicea and Annie.

There was an even bigger squeal of excitement, as the television flashed up the even later news:

'Emm to POTUS "u aren't grabbing my pussy, but Ivanka is cute, hehe".'

Mons, faint with the excitement, had to be given mouth to cunt resuscitation by Julie. Moll kindly helped stimulate Julie and was, in turns, helped by Mons. Young Ann was blushing, but transfixed. Laura cuddled me close, and Rebecca seemed deep in conversation with Alicea.

As the credits rolled for the Prime Time News, we could see Miss Susie and Emm. Swigging another couple of bottles, we sat back to watch, with me leaning on Laura's bosom, purring happily.

'We have with us tonight Miss Susie Deviant, and Emm. Emm is, as you know, Oscar nominated, but she shot to fame with this Monroe style shot.'

At which point Emm's pudenda reached out nationally, so to say, from sea to glistening sea.

'Emm, what do you have to say for yourself?'

'Well,' said Emm, leaning forward to give everyone a view of her finest assets, 'these puppies are already a familiar sight to viewers of the film, and I see no reason to hide the other assets. You called it Monroe-style, but Jeff, she wore panties, they are so passé. The contemporary style is to let nature take its course.'

'But Emm, millions of people have been offended, how do you feel about that?'

'If I might interrupt Jeff,' said Miss Susie, interrupting as only she could, 'even more millions have seen the film, and do you suppose there is no overlap between the two groups? How many of those Pastors denouncing Emm are already familiar with her God-given gifts? We live up to the School motto, "We are the best, so screw the rest," and I'd guess that some of those condemning Emm need screwing. My girls will be happy to help the poor saps out. But less of this hypocrisy, the religious Right consume porn too - we all do.'

Along the bottom of the screen came a fresh Twitter hashtag: 'Susie rocks.'

'Oh my God,' said Alicea, 'it's trending, so we have the top three trending hashtags.'

She showed me, as I reluctantly came up for air:

'#Emmtoo, #susierocks, #Emmscunt.'

Annie broke in:

'Miss, Victoria's Secrets are offering Emm a million-dollar deal if she will wear their panties!'

Rebecca asked if they would be interested in her, and Annie promised to follow it up, if Rebecca would let her have some suitable photographs.

Back on television, the unctuous Jeff was persisting with a line of questioning that could only lead him to disaster.

'But Miss Deviant, what sort of School allows its students to appear in porn movies?'

'Jeff, have you ever viewed porn on-line, or seen a porn movie?'

The poor guy went red.

'Quite, it's a part of life, and a contemporary school gets its girls ready for jobs that will always exist and that are in tune with modern times. It used to be that girls were prepared for hearth, home and child-rearing, now they need preparing for the world of work. Do you know how big the porn industry is? It is making America great again. Our battle cry on behalf of tens of millions of Americans is: "Make Orgasms for Americans Now." MOAN should be our watchword.'

That soon became the new top trending Twitter hashtag, with a retweet from POTUS himself, although his spokeswoman later said that his tiny hand had slipped and pressed the wrong button.

Angie was whooping:

'Dirty old bastard, just heard he is attending the Oscars after all. Still the good news is they want the backing group with Belles and the Banned.'

I could see Mons, Angie and Moll as the next "Three Degrees."

Grabbing their dildos and vibrators as pretend mics, they launched into a chorus of "Baby love," until I stopped them on the grounds of impropriety.

Belles, who appeared to have been hiding up Julie's skirt emerged, and asked Rebecca whether she was still 'up' for playing the bass.

'Bass, drums, tubular bells, actual Belles, do bring them on,' giggled Rebecca.

By the time Emm and Miss Susie got back, we had exciting news for them.

'Go on then, Hoffy, fill me in. No, not literally at the moment, I have Rebecca for that.'

She smiled at Rebecca, who blushed most becomingly.

'Sorry Miss Susie, habit. Well, Miss Sinn has just signed a deal with the Press to syndicate a column on "how to train a slut," with her own television show on Literotica Media. Belles and the Banned of St Trinian's are not only playing at the Oscars, they have a nation-wide tour lined up here, and Emm has now been offered $2m to wear panties for Victoria's Secrets.'

'Pix, for that amount, I'd even keep them on for an hour,' Emm laughed.

'It gets better,' I added, 'Miss Cummington back at school reports we have had a 200% increase in enquiries from America alone,'

'Fuck me Hoffy, no not literally, I have Becca for fucking, but God, not even I thought it would go this well.'

She, Angie and Alicea exchanged what is, I believe, called a 'high five.' Mel, who would be in charge of induction, calculated the value of another 50 girls at £22k a year, and there was a general call for more bubbly.

The last thing I recall, before the lights went out, was licking Laura's delicious pussy, and looking across to see Rebecca doing the same for Miss Susie, Moll was very busy helping Mel to a second orgasm, whilst Miss Sinn and Mons were doing something behind the sofa. Julie and Alicea decided it was time for Ann to be less shy, while Annie, resourceful as ever, was helping Miss Susie. She would go far, that one. Emm and Belles were finding sixty-nine ways not to leave your lover.

It really was the case that 'Love is all around you.' We could certainly scent it in the air.

My last waking thought as Laura came, and Miss Natalie made shy young Ann orgasm, was that if this was our first half day in America, what on earth would the morrow bring?