Left Alone Ch. 04

"Fuck you're gorgeous" Liam moaned as he ran his hands all over the boy's smooth skin.

"I could say the same about you." Caleb said he as turned a few shades of red and leaned in to kiss his boy. He placed his bare palms on Liam's chest, feeling the small hairs form on the taut skin as he attacked the boy with his mouth. Caleb shuddered as he felt the older boy's hand wrap around their cocks, pressed together with their heads practically glazing each other with precum. They looked down together, watching the motions as Liam tugged on both of them at the same time with a matched lust they'd never experienced before. The older boy took his finger and made a figure eight on the two wet tips, gathering as much precum as he could before bringing it up to their lips. He coated the soft flesh and pulled Caleb into a kiss that soon turned into a battle of dominance with neither boy showing any signs of surrender.

Caleb could taste their juices on his tongue along with the slight saltiness that was cured into Liam's skin that only made him want to suck and taste even more. He extended out his tongue and lapped up Liam's lips causing the older boy to snicker. With the same level of playfulness, Liam went back to stroking their cocks with Caleb grinding against his thighs. Sopping wet with precum, they slid against each other with enough friction that Caleb could feel his climax charging through his body.

He pressed his forehead against his boy and with a warm breath that flushed all the sanity out of Liam's body, he pleaded, "Cum with me" before taking the lips that were rightfully his. That was enough to send Liam over the edge, and over the edge he fell, taking Caleb's lips along with him. The two boys stayed fixed like that, with their foreheads pressed against each other and wet lips making contact. Their breathing slowed, each coming down from their high and falling back to the ground with parachutes in hand.

Liam looked down to see his handiwork, finding his fist still wrapped around their cocks that didn't seem to be going down anytime soon. He could feel the cum dripping down his abs, pooling at his crotch and, looking over, he saw Caleb soaked in the same exact way. He pulled his fist closer, seeing the fresh cum shining against his creamy white skin and extended his tongue to taste it. He'd never tasted cum before today, not even his own. But there was something about the way Caleb brought him to completion these two times that made him desperate to taste the fruits of their labor.

"I'm beginning to think you have a problem." Caleb said as he leaned over and licked up some of the cum that dripped off Liam's chin.

"Then that makes two of us." He said with a smile and pulled the younger boy closer. He held him in his arms for a while, enjoying the heat that radiated from their bodies along with a wisps of air that cooled their damp bodies. He turned his face slightly and kissed Caleb's cheek leaving the boy beaming in admiration. All sense of regret was cast out the window along with every ounce of doubt or shame. They were hopelessly falling with each boy convinced that they were even more invested than the other. Liam couldn't remember the last time he'd trusted someone so wholeheartedly that it hurt, in the pit of his stomach. But all he knew was that if this is what falling for someone felt like, he'd never want to touch that godforsaken ground.

***

Liam stood in the foyer, having just put his shoes back on while the shirt he wore yesterday hung over his shoulder. Caleb watched, still wearing only the sweatpants he pulled on after they'd finished, with the waist so low, the older boy was tempted not to leave at all. He was in awe of how quickly they progressed with the thought of being with his friend as the most abstract concept that existed in his black and white mind. But yet here he was within inches of that beloved boy, able to reach out and touch him until his fingertips were familiar with every inch of that amber covered skin.

Caleb stepped closer, brushing his hands against the boy's fore arms lightly dusted with brown hair. He tapped his toes against the worn sneakers, "Hey. Thank you for this weekend." He gulped, not wanting to be swept away in painful memories that'd send him upstream. "I wasn't in a good place Saturday morning, but you came along and somehow turned it around."

"I just didn't want you to be sad."

Caleb nodded, turning his lips up into a smile. He reached up and kissed the boy, pressing his lips ever-so-slightly against his. It was chaste, but there was something about the way those green eyes bore into his skin that made up for it.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Liam said as he pulled away, cursing at himself in the process.

***

Liam slipped back into his car, feeling the worn fabric on the car seats like a childhood blanket he could never throw away. He cruised out of Lakeshore, feeling the evening breeze blow through his windows as Kodaline softly played from the speakers. He let out a sigh, feeling a slight emptiness as he passed through the gates and entered Clover. He was waking up from a dream- one that took him far away from the reality he could only escape in his subconscious. And as the sidewalks narrowed and streets widened, he could feel that kick pushing back to the real world.

He let out a sigh as he pulled off the lane and found a spot only a dozen or so feet from the entrance to his apartment complex. Fumbling with the keys, he warred with himself, not sure how he wanted to proceed. He couldn't let the weekend with Caleb be a one-off thing, he needed it to be real. But as long as he paraded around two different worlds, it could never be. So he knew he had to do something about it.

Melissa Holt sat at the couch with her knees practically touching her chest as Liam came through the front door. She set down the lukewarm coffee she'd been nursing since she got off her shift around five. After years of downing coffee like it was water, the stuff didn't have the same effect on her anymore- a habit that Liam was sure he'd inherit if he kept working the way she did.

"Hey honey", she called out, seeing her son in the space between the counter and the overhead cabinets.

Liam set his keys down, replying "Hey ma" as he joined her on the couch. "I thought you were working a double today?" He said as he eased his back into the cushions.

"I was, until Cathy checked my timesheet and saw I was nearing the cap for the week." She looked over at her son, "I guess even nurses could be overworked, who'd of thought?" Liam watched her laugh, seeing how the years had treated her. She was undoubtedly beautiful, but when you live a life constantly at motion, time isn't always so kind. He thought about this- about everything she'd sacrificed and worked towards in order to give him a life that was satisfactory. He knew it was, but she wasn't so sure. And fought a war within himself about how quickly things could turn to shrapnel should he tell her everything.

This weighed down on Liam so much so that the two of them sat in silence for a few minutes. "Mom, I need to talk to you about something." He managed.

"What is it sweetie?" She asked, looking over at her sullen son who'd fallen back into himself. "Look if this is about the rent, I already paid Mrs. Gonzalez in advance for next month, so we're good."

Liam shook his head, "No, it's not about that." He suddenly felt like changing the subject and forgetting that this conversation ever happened.

"Liam, tell me what's on your mind." She said, scooting closer.

"I'm gay, mom."

Liam looked over at his mother, letting those words radiate throughout the room and bounce off every flat surface they made contact with. There was no escape now; he could feel his sentence ricochet off the patched walls and linoleum tiles, until finally they found respite in Melissa Holt's ears.

"I've known for a while" He said, looking over at her as she reached for his arm as if needing to hold onto something, because this new truth seemed to manifest out of nowhere and she was left on shaky ground. "I've just been so caught up with everything going on that I suppressed that part of me, hoping maybe that it would just go away."

Liam's voice cracked and threw his head back, not wanting to look his mother in the eye. "But it's not going away and I can't keep pretending anymore. Even if it mean's that you'll never accept me." He could hear himself softly sobbing, having no control of his emotions any longer. Melissa let the boy cry for a few seconds, allowing these bottled up tears to flow out of his ducts so quickly, they left shining rivers along his face.

Melissa cradled her son in her arms just like she did when he was younger, feeling his adult body hug her tighter than he ever had. "My boy, my strong, beautiful boy." She said, rubbing her calloused hands over his back. "Look at me, son."

Liam composed himself and took his mother's glance straight on. She cupped his jaw in her palms, raising his face so their matching green eyes saw only each other.

"I've loved you all your life and you've grown into this man with so much compassion that I swear, is going to take you places someday. This part of you-" she said, pointing directly at him, "it's who you are and it doesn't change how much you mean to me. You understand?"

Liam nodded, feeling this weight fall off his shoulders that he'd been forced to carry for what felt like an eternity. He exhaled, shuddering as the last of all the negative emotions eased their way out of his tired body. He was free. The closet that he'd hid in for all these years was completely cleared out and, with a final blinking of his eyes to wipe away the tears, he locked the door, vowing never to return again.

"You don't know how relieved I am to hear that." He said with bated breath.

Melissa stroked her son's back, "When your father went away, I spent so many nights locked away in my bedroom desperately crying into the pillows and hoping that you couldn't hear." She turned to face him, "We moved into this tiny apartment with only a few boxes of stuff that wasn't taken away. And on those nights when it felt like I couldn't cry anymore, I knew that the only thing I had of any value was you."

"You'll always be accepted by me, Liam. And when you go off an live your life, you'll meet people along the way who'll accept you- all of you."

Liam hugged tighter, not remembering the last time he'd talked to his mom this way. No conversation about working overtime, or picking up groceries, but telling her how he feels. It felt like the most foreign thing to him at the time, but from recent experience, things that make you uneasy aren't always bad.

"I think I've met someone-" He said, feeling a small curve form at his lips as it turned to a smile, "who values every jaded piece of me."

Melissa smiled too, kissing her son on the forehead, "Then hold onto him, son. Don't let him go, no matter what comes in the way."