Lessons for My Son Ch. 03

The first step was attitude, and I hope you have put some effort into it. If you have, then you are miles forward in your journey.

The next step is closer physical affection.

Before you're ready to incorporate this, I hope you have really invested the time in step one, and that you are paying attention to your Mom. You can't rush this. Remember, employ small incremental steps, and be sure of a solid foundation before you begin to build on it. If you're not sure, wait. There is a little risk in this step - not much - but you don't want to take any chances of raising her defensive screens. You lose nothing by waiting, and putting more effort into good interaction with her. But, if you think you're ready...

I want you to hug her tight. No more of those foot-away-back-patting and awkward hugs. Arms around her waist. Bring her in to your body. Hug her tight. Don't worry if she feels something down there (ahem). She won't mention it, and you won't mention it. Don't grind into her, understand, just hug her tight. Full body contact. Don't hold it too long - it's just a hug, remember? You are transitioning from an innocent hug to a lover's hug, so tell her you love her.

That worked pretty well, didn't it? She liked it. You liked it. From now on, that is your baseline. A good, tight full-body lover's hug.

When I'm around, make it a little less, understand? When I'm not where I can see, make it closer and more intimate. You don't ever want to go back to those stiff, uncaring hugs, but you want the hugs I can see to be just a little less intense. Remember, you are trying to establish the idea that there is a difference in how you two interact when I'm there, and when I'm not. You want to establish and build on the idea that the two of you have a secret level in your relationship. Once you get her to understand that your close affection is something that I should not know about, you are a major step forward in reaching your goal.

With that intimate hug, you introduced closer intimate physical contact between the two of you. So, you want to build on that. When you're out shopping or just walking around, hold her hand. Don't make it a grab-her-hand-and-never-let-go thing. Just sometimes reach down and take her hand. That may not mean much to you, but it will speak volumes to her.

Don't be afraid of your dick. We'll talk more later about this, but I suspect whenever you're around her you will be, well, up and ready. Don't be afraid of that, or shy about it but, in fact, encourage it. Don't call attention to it, yet, but when you hug her, let her feel it. When you're around her, don't try to hide it or run to another room when it pops up. When you're with her and hard, keep eye contact and reach down to surreptitiously adjust it. Don't overdo this - do it rarely, but don't be afraid to do it if you have to. Her eyes will be on your eyes, but she'll know what you're doing. Believe me, she knows it's there and she's interested in it. I'll bet you catch her checking you out sometimes. If you don't make it an issue, she won't either, and she'll be pretty flattered, curious, and turned on. You just want her to know that when she's around, your dick is hard.

Joke with her. Play with her. Have conversations with her. Make her know you enjoy being with her, and let her enjoy being with you. Have private jokes, just between the two of you. Maybe it's something like that slice of pizza you shared when you were shopping, and you agreed that I shouldn't know about it. You want to have secrets with her, harmless at first, but secrets.

When you're sitting on the couch watching television, sit beside her and sometimes take her hand. You don't want to be overly affectionate when I'm there, because you don't want to embarrass her or make her feel vulnerable in doing something I might see and misunderstand. But when I'm not there, and I promise I'll give you plenty of opportunities, be a little more affectionate. Keep it light. You don't want her to think there is anything behind it - you're just showing affection.

Maybe she'll want to stretch out, so give her some room and encourage her to put her legs across your lap. Again, don't be afraid of your dick. Rub her feet. Put a hand on her ankle, just holding her leg. Don't make a move up her leg yet; that will come later.

Go to movies with her. Movies are dark and allow a little secret hand holding. Reach across your body with your off-hand, and hold her upper arm as you're holding her hand. That's a little more advanced than just hand holding, and she will wonder if you're going to go for her breast. You won't, it's too early for that, but the image will be in her head. Mentally, she'll be getting ready for it. She might even be a little disappointed you didn't, but don't rush. You'll get there. When you leave the movie, hold her hand as you walk to the car and, when no one else is around, put your arm around her. She's your girl.

Take her to lunch. Take her to dinner. You won't call it a date, but she'll know. It's time for you and her to bond together. When you're alone, if she makes a joke about it being a date, laugh and say, "God, I hope I get lucky!" You're laughing, but what did you just tell her? "I want to make love to you, Mom."

The first time you show her innocent physical affection, she's going to be somewhat shocked. She has wanted that from you, but until now there has not been a lot. This is your first testing point. If she accepts it with no comment, then you've put a new arrow in your quiver. If she makes a comment, like, "Where is this coming from?" then keep it light. Just say, "I just love you, Mom." She might take her hand away and say something like, "Well, I'm not your girlfriend." If she says that, then you might respond laughingly with, "Yeah, I wish." But keep it light. Laugh. Don't make it serious, because that could lead to a discussion you're not ready to have yet.

But don't give up if that happens. The next time you sit with her watching television or something else, do it again. Take her hand, squeeze it, and then let it go. At some point she will get comfortable with it, and it won't be long before she's reaching for your hand. Go no farther for a good while. Let this settle in. Let her get accustomed to it, addicted to it. There's nothing threatening there - just a son holding his Mom's hand.

When I'm not around, put a blanket over your laps, and hold her hand under it. That allows you to do it with some security in case I come wandering in, and it enhances the idea that there is something you are doing that is just between you two. If you really want to inject some excitement in the mix, do it when I'm in the room with you. Put the blanket over your laps and, when she puts her hand under it, reach for it. Believe it or not, that will be deliciously exciting for her. The other advantage of holding hands under the blanket is that it encourages her to feel comfortable enough to rest your hand on her leg, or her hand on yours. For God's sake, man, don't push it. If she rests your hand on her leg, just let it rest there. Don't grab her leg in an obviously sexual move. This is harmless and innocent, right? But you have your hand on your Mom's leg! Whether she admits it to herself or not yet, that is a lover's touch.

When both of you are comfortable with that, then at an appropriate time you might consider putting your arm around her and hugging her into you. Don't keep your arm around her. You don't want her to think you're making a move on her. Just reach over, hug her to you, and let it go. It's not threatening, but just a gesture of your affection for her. If she wants more, she'll take your hand and put your arm back around her.

When you've established a pattern of doing that, there will come a time when she snuggles into you, rests her head on your chest, and indicates she wants you to keep your arm around her. I don't know when that time will come. It could be the first time you put your arm around her and hug her to you or it might come after weeks of doing it, but it will come. When she does, reach over with your hand and lovingly caress her hair. Just a gesture. A lover's gesture. Bend down and gently kiss her head. Pay attention to how her head is oriented. Is she watching the tv? Is she looking down? If she's looking down, she's checking out your erection. Progress!

Think about where you are now. You're sitting on the couch alone with your Mother, you're snuggling with her, and you have her aware of your hard dick. If you had tried that a couple of months ago when you started this journey, you'd have gotten nowhere and you would have scared her away. But you did your basic work, and look where it got you.

Touching. Touching is key to human interaction, and in a later lesson we'll go into it more. When you're just sitting around talking, at appropriate moments touch her arm when you're making a point. When she's sitting down showing you something and you're standing beside her, put your hand on her shoulder. You're touching, and you're showing affection. You're making love to her. It might not be appropriate if you're sitting in the food court talking, so do it when you're alone with her. Again, you're making the point that there are two different levels of your interaction - one for when you're in public or someone else is around, and one for when you're together alone.

Flirt with her when you're alone. I can't tell you how to flirt if you don't know, but just make jokes with her. Tell her she's beautiful. Tell her that what she's wearing really looks good on her. Tell her you like the way she wears her hair. You don't want to come across as creepy, but you're just telling her that in your eyes she's looking pretty damned good. Your approval and appreciation of how she is looking is money in the bank for you. In your eyes, she is beautiful. And in your eyes, that is the truth. If it's not, then you're in this for the wrong reasons and you should just give up.

Be acutely receptive to, and aware of, her body language when she's around you, especially when you're alone.

What is she wearing? Is her blouse/shirt buttoned to the top, or does she have a few buttons undone? If she has some buttons undone, allow your eyes to briefly glance down to her breasts when you're talking. Don't leer and don't stare. Maybe it quick. I guarantee she will notice, she will appreciate the attention, and it will excite her.

Does her body language indicate a tense defensive posture, or an open posture? Arms folded over her chest? Or does she gesture freely with her hands and occasionally touch you? Is she talking nervously, chattering away more than usual? Don't over-analyze - she could be nervous because she's afraid of what you want, or she might be nervous because she's afraid of what she wants. It's just an indication that your presence is affecting her, and that she is thinking the same thing you're thinking.

Maintain eye contact with her, and see if she maintains it with you. Remember the old song, "You're just too good to be true. Can't take my eyes off of you." When you're talking to her, keep that constant eye contact. People who are attracted to each other tend to hold eye contact more than people who are not mutually attracted. When you're close to her, maybe in a restaurant or sitting at the kitchen table, check out her pupils as you maintain eye contact with her. Are they dilated? That could mean she finds you attractive.

When you're listening to something she's saying and maintaining eye contact, think deeply erotic thoughts of her. When you consciously do that, don't make it a fleeting thought, but concentrate on it. Give it time to allow your body to react to your thoughts. Think of the first deep and real kiss she's going to give you. Think of sucking her breasts. Think of what it's going to be like the first time she intentionally touches your diamond hard dick. Go ahead, think of the first blowjob she's going to give you.

Why am I telling you this? Is it just to torture you? No. Research has shown that our unconscious mind can rapidly determine and assess micro expressions from someone we're talking with. If the two people are mutually attracted, one person's body language and micro cues can drive the other person's unconscious. Simply put, then, when you think passionate thoughts and cause your micro expressions (pupil dilation, nostril flaring, lip swelling, heavy breathing, flushed face, etc) to communicate passion, you will cause your Mom's unconscious mind to consider passion with you. Your micro expressions are saying, "I can picture you the first time you give me a blowjob, and I'm liking it." Mom's unconscious will process, "Wow. Those expressions are just like the expressions on someone's face when I'm giving him a good blowjob. Hmm. I wonder if my son wants me to give him a blowjob?" That's a little bit of an exaggeration, but not much, and is something you can work with.

In this lesson you've ramped it up a bit. You know what you want, and you're working toward it. Your Mom knows what you want, even if she isn't acknowledging it yet. I'd say everything is pretty much on track, so keep at it. Take your time. Enjoy the journey. Know that you can still press "Pause" and come back to the same place later, if you want.

But don't ever lower the level of affection or pull away from her. I don't care if you've found a girlfriend and changed your mind about what you want from Mom, or if you just want to quit altogether. You don't know what you're going to want in five more years, say, so keep the foundation strong and your options open. If you pull away or cool off, you run the risk of creating a jilted-lover-syndrome, in which she thinks you were toying with her and builds up resistance against it.

Nope. Loving affection is your baseline now. If you are constantly showing her affection, you can always move to the next step without any problems. Make sure you have your Mother absolutely addicted to your affection before you move to the next lesson, but when you're ready for it, click on.