Life on Isekai Easy

"Mom?" I called out as I entered. "I had a really bad day and I kinda want to talk about it. Can you stop whatever you're doing?"

"In the kitchen sweetie," Mom called back. I frowned. That certainly hadn't been a yes.

When I entered our small, sparse kitchen I nearly gasped in surprise. Sitting across from my mother was a uniformed police officer. I mean, she was at least dressed as a police officer. Surely I couldn't be blamed if I doubted that a five foot tall blonde who looked like she belonged on the front page of a woman's health magazine was a real police officer.

"Officer Patricks was just explaining to me that there was almost a hit and run on your way home from school. Something about reckless driving?" Mom said, her eyes imploring, as if desperately wanting to know that I had been safe.

"Well, I was sorta walking in the road," I said, scratching the back of my neck.

"The behavior of the driver was utterly reprehensible," Officer Patricks said, turning her chair to face me. I tried not to be overt about my appreciation for her form fitting slacks or the way the top button of her blue blouse was undone, but judging from the mortified expression on my mother's face I hadn't been particularly successful.

"He should have exhibited much greater caution when driving near someone so obviously capable. This world has enough useless men without one of the good ones being taken from us so young," Officer Patricks went on, looking to my mother as if looking for agreement.

Weird thing to say, but it gave me a chance to appreciate her assets a bit more so I wasn't complaining. Mom remained silent as well.

"I came to give your son all of the details about the attempted hit and run and to find out if he wanted to press civil charges in addition to our pending criminal charges. The driver was quite wealthy so if you retained a competent lawyer, which I would be happy to assist with, you could come out ahead of this whole fiasco.

Mom perked up at that. Silly bint. It would be my money, not hers.

"That's very kind of you, Officer Patricks," I said, trying to sound as if people waltzed into my shitty apartment offering a new lease on life every day.

"Please," she said, smiling widely for some reason. "Call me Alex. Before we go into that, however, it's essential you're brought up to date on our investigation so far."

"It seems pretty straightforward to me," I said, not sure why she was being so pushy.

"Would you mind if I discussed the details with your son alone? Victim-police privilege, you understand," Alex said, having turned to my mother.

"Oh, of course," Mom said. "Whatever will help the investigation. Doug, I'll be downstairs at Mrs. Whitmer's."

"Chad," I corrected absently.

"Chad?" my mother asked.

"Chad," Alex said, smiling and nodding.

"Chad," I confirmed.

"Well, Chad, I'll be downstairs with Mrs. Whitmer. Come get me when you're all caught up," Mom said. She had placed a strange emphasis on my new name, but then again, I suppose she wouldn't understand what it was like to come face to face with a biblical angel and be given a new lease on life.

Doug was dead, Chad's story was just beginning.

Alex and I were silent as my mother got her purse and left the room. The front door shut quietly behind her.

Before I knew what was going on, Alex had stood up and moved directly in front of me. Her eyes were glistening and I felt the strangest desire to reach out a hand and wipe away the pretty woman's tears.

"You almost died," Alex said softly.

"I feel like I did die, in another life," I said. Maybe that was melodramatic but, in my defense, she was being pretty weird too.

Alex gasped at my words. Her head leaned forward until she was leaning against my chest with her eyes closed and her lips pursed. A single tear fell from her eye.

I gave into the urge to wipe it away. She sighed softly.

"Um, shouldn't we discuss the case now," I said. She was rather scatterbrained for a cop.

"You don't have to worry about the case. I'm going to make sure that you win. Let me take care of everything," Alex said.

"That's very nice, but I don't want you to do that."

"It's no trouble," she said.

"No, I mean I literally don't know you at all. You might not even be a cop for all I know," I said. Rude, but I had been wondering. Seemed unusual for a cop to show up and behave like this, but then again I had never been a big fan of Law and Order. Maybe this was standard procedure.

Alex fiddled with the collar of her shirt, as if she was nervous. "So you're saying we don't know each other well enough?"

"Pretty much, yeah," I said.

The next thing I knew, Alex was standing on her tiptoes and pressing her lips against mine. My senses all went haywire at the same time. All I could feel was the softness of her lips. All I could smell was the vanilla of her shampoo. All I could hear was the ticking of the cuckoo clock above the refrigerator.

Without any conscious thought on my part, almost against my will, my right hand went down and cupped Alex's ass. She let out a groan but didn't break our kiss.

I pulled away, bracing myself for a headbutt, but Alex just stared at me with a confused expression. "Did I do something wrong?" she asked.

"No. I just thought you were going to hit me," I said.

"Why would you think that?" She sounded hurt, I thought.

"Because Carla headbutted me earlier for grabbing her ass."

"Last name and appearance?" Alex asked, her voice turning frosty and her eyes looking more like cold diamonds than their usual soft blue. Weird.

"Uhhh, didn't really get a good look at her," I said. Sure, Carla had hurt me a bit, but judging from the way Alex was fingering the hilt of her pistol it probably wouldn't be a good idea to tell her.

"If you remember anything, please let me know. I won't ever let someone hurt you," Alex said. Then she leaned up and kissed me again. I gave her ass an appreciative squeeze and was rewarded with a soft groan from the beautiful cop.

Finally, my luck was turning. Carla must have just been a frigid bitch. This was more in line with what I had expected after how Uriel was talking up the new difficulty.

My cock hardened in an instant. Alex's hand drifted up and ran along my (considerably enhanced) length.

"Should we go to your bedroom," Alex asked, biting her lip. It was a good look on her.

"After you, my lady," I said gallantly, enjoying the way she giggled.

Alex took a quick glance around my room as we entered. I supposed from her widened eyes she was impressed by what she found. I had been collecting those anime figurines for the better part of the last five years. All of them were in mint condition. Sometimes, just knowing they were there was enough to make me feel better. My own plastic harem.

Now, I supposed, I had no need for a plastic harem.

I grabbed Alex by the shoulders and pushed her down onto my plush Pikachu comforter.

"Wait," she said, as I stood in front of her.

"Wait?" I asked, incredulously. My cock was sticking out straight ahead, like a diving rod, tenting my loose jeans obscenely. It was so hard that it actually hurt. And she wanted me to wait?

"It's better if we use a condom," Alex said, softly, like she was trying to calm me down.

"I only have condoms in my car. It's in a parking garage three blocks away," I said. Also, those condoms were almost four years old and I kept them more for the mental boost of knowing that if, in some strange world, it happened, that I would be prepared.

"Oh. Maybe your mother has some?" she suggested.

"She hasn't had sex since my dad left over ten years ago," I said confidently.

Alex bit her lip. She looked conflicted.

"I'm clean," I promised. "I've never had sex before so it would be really weird if I had herpes or something."

From the expression on her face, I would've thought someone had just told her that Kim Kardashian had just become president.

"You're a virgin? I would've thought the girls at school would've been all over you," Alex said.

Shit. Had to remember that admitting weakness in front of a female was the fastest way to loose interest. Carla was proof that my new difficult level wasn't foolproof.

I let my hands slam down on either side of Alex's head. Her eyes widened dramatically.

"I've been waiting for the right woman," I said, making my voice as deep as I could.

"Oh," she said. A soft blush overtook her face.

I leaned my head down and captured her lips. She kissed me back, passionately, and soon her tongue was intertwining with mine.

I had thought that there was more finesse involved in French kissing but Alex seemed to enjoy it when I just sorta shoved it in and ran it along the inside of her mouth. Her moans and groans grew increasingly enthusiastic.

After only a minute of that I moved my hands down to the front of her blue blouse and, with deliberate movements, began to unbutton it. I broke our kiss to survey the fruits of my labor.

The first button revealed nothing but a strip of creamy white skin. The second hinted at the promise of a white lacy bra. Each successive button showed a little more, until her shirt was hanging totally open. Her stomach was flat and taught. The white lacy bra concealed perfectly perky breasts that I ached to see.

With a deft hand I reached under Alex and unhooked her bra. Then, with a dismissive toss, I let it fly to the corner of the room, where it settled on top of my lava lamp.

Alex moved to shrug out of her blouse. I put one hand on her arm.

"Leave it on," I said with a smile. "It reminds me that you're a cop."

Any worry I had that was too honest vanished when I saw her smile.

"My boyfriend likes that too," Alex said. We both paused.

"Boyfriend? We can't do this if you have a boyfriend," I said with a frown. Cheating was bad. If Mom had assured me of one thing growing up it was that cheating was Bad. Capital letters king of bad.

Alex pulled her phone out of her pocket, typed on it rapidly for a few seconds, and then turned it off and tossed it to the floor.

"I'm single," she said.

"Are you sure? You just said you had a boyfriend."

"100% single. I'm all yours," she said, with an encouraging smile.

My brain was telling me to press, but my cock was telling me to fuck the attractive cop who had voluntarily entered my Fortress of Solitude.

"Ok. If you're sure," I said, before leaning down to kiss her again.

She kissed me back even more passionately than before. Our tongues dueled, and with increasingly confident movements I unbuttoned her slacks and dragged them down her slim legs.

"Promise me you'll pull out," Alex said, momentarily breaking our liplock.

"I promise," I said.

Her panties, white and lacy, soon joined her bra on top of my lava lamp.

I looked down at the sight before me. A beautiful police officer lay flat on her back on my bed, her legs spread enough that I could see the blonde strip of hair right above her pussy, the only stitch of clothing on her an unbuttoned blouse that was a part of her uniform.

"It's ok if you don't last long," Alex said. "Guys never do for their first time. Just enjoy it."

"Don't worry about me," I said, confidently. "You're about to have your mind blown."

I nudged her legs apart and then nestled above her prize. My cock pressed against her lips. Then, with a single swift movement, I buried myself inside of her.

She cried out in pleasure at the same time I did. It was like nothing I had ever felt before. She was too tight, too wet, too gorgeous. My ass cheeks clenched as I unloaded my seed into the beautiful cop in front of me.

As in having a sympathetic response, Alex came as well. Her entire body twitched along with me, until I felt the last dribbles of cum leaving my still erect cock.

The room was silent except for our soft gasping for breath.

"Did you just come inside me?" she asked.

I pulled my cock out. A stream of cum started to drip out of her pussy as soon as I did.

"Looks like it," I said.

She sighed.

"It's okay," I said, with a reassuring tone. "You can just get some Plan B and poof!"

"Poof?"

"Yeah. So no big deal."

She paused, and then looked at my cock. It gave a salute back, as if aroused by just the fact that she would acknowledge it.

"You're still hard."

"Yeah. I really want to fuck you again," I said honestly.

Alex bit her lip. She did that a lot I noted.

"Will you pull out this time."

I hesitated. It had felt really good to come inside her. Plus with Plan B there was no real reason not to. That stuff was almost 100% effective, according to 4chan.

"I promise I'll pull out," I lied.

She smiled up at me, then let her legs spread even farther. "Then you can do whatever you want to me, handsome."

Without further preamble, I shoved myself backside the beautiful cop and began to fuck her to a second orgasm.

Soon the only sound in my bedroom was our moans, groans, and the squeaking of old rusty springs.

----------------------------

I pulled my softening cock out of Alex. My fourth load of the night dribbled out after it. Slightly less than my first load, but still more than I had ever managed as Doug.

"Sorry, I forgot to pull out. Again," I said. If it didn't sound particularly sincere it was because it was hard to repeat the same excuse three times and still make it believable. I wasn't DiCaprio after all.

"That's fine, baby. You were great," Alex said. She had had a smile plastered on her face for the past hour, ever since her fifth orgasm.

My comforter was ruined, of course. I would have to tell Mom I needed a new one. Some cum stains could be concealed, or removed; I was an expert at that. But this was enough cum to impregnate the entire block. The comforter would have to be bundled up and burned to ensure that it wasn't a danger to every woman in a mile radius.

"I really liked having sex with you," I said.

Alex propped herself up on her shoulder. "Yeah? You feel closer to me now?"

"Oh yeah. If you wanna handle my case or whatever feel free," I said. No way she would double cross me after her orgasm count reached the double digits. "Just make sure to get me my money at the end and come over whenever I text you."

Alex sat up and pushed herself back against the wall alongside me. I tried to ignore how she was smearing my cum even deeper into the comforter. She leaned against me and exhaled gently.

"If we could do this every day I would die happy," she said.

I swallowed nervously. Alex was great and all, but I had other girls I wanted to bring back here too. Couldn't do that if Alex turned into a permanent resident.

"Monthly sounds good to me too," I said loudly.

Alex blinked. "Monthly?"

"Maybe even twice a month," I said, nodding.

If her smile became a little stilted at that, well, who could blame her.

"I know I just kinda laid there at the end but can you blame me? I've never orgasmed more than once before, and you gave me a dozen."

She sounded really defensive. I felt bad and rushed to reassure her.

"You were incredible. I can't even imagine losing my virginity to someone else. I'm just really concerned about my studies," I said. Heh. Studies. Like this was Victorian England.

"Oh," Alex said, "That makes sense." She perked up a bit and then kissed me on the cheek. "I'm going to go clean up."

"Bathroom is at the end of the hall," I said, reaching for my phone. No missed messages, but I liked having its weight in my hands. Gave me an excuse to talk less to the strange woman who I had just had hours of sweaty sex with but knew nothing about.

"Thanks," Alex said, and left the room.

I browsed my phone absently for a few minutes before Alex returned, a blush on her face. She had pulled her still unbuttoned blouse close around her.

"Um, your mom wants to see you when you're decent," she said.

Ohhhh. Awkward for her. "I'll go talk to her. You should probably..."

"Yeah, I'll head out now. I put my number in your phone. Text me when you want to see me," she said. I blinked. When had she put her number in my phone? Actually, how had she gotten in my phone in the first place?

Alex gave me a soft kiss on the lips after she dressed again. "Don't wait too long to text me," she said.

"Of course not," I said.

A few minutes later, she was sneaking out the apartment's front door while I had what was, even for me, an extremely embarrassing conversation with Mom.

On the other hand, I thought, it was almost nice of Uriel to give me the world but keep Mom the same. I had to imagine that if the difficulty change affected her she wouldn't be lecturing me so fervently about 'loose women'. I decided to just roll with the lecture and not let Mom know that Alex had been the opposite of loose.

A soft smile crossed my face. I was an isekai hero on Earth. I had just lose my virginity to some weird yandere cop who could've moonlighted as a model, and the fun times were just getting started.

"Are you listening to me?" Mom asked.

"Oh yeahhhhhh," I said, before giggling to myself.