Lost at Sea Bk. 02 Ch. 26

Sure enough, at the table sat the redhead Jack had managed to accidentally upset earlier. The bottle in her hand was mostly empty, and she was talking to herself.

"She thinks I dinnae know, that I cannae tell!" Candy snapped angrily. "I'm no' a feckin' idiot! It's just like wha' happened wit' our da's, and tae you!"

She took a swig off her bottle. "I dinnae know how much longer I c'n take it, Kate. Even after everything tha' bitch did tae us, Cal's still a lost feckin' cause. If not for Cass I'd be gone years ago. I don' rightly want tae leave her, or ye, but this place is gon tae be the death o' me."

The scene slowly squeezed Jack's chest with sadness. Something about watching the redhead talk to empty space made Jack feel like whatever tragedy had happened was still happening. "Excuse me," Jack said, not knowing exactly what to say, but uncomfortable about how much she had already witnessed.

The redhead whirled and squinted with red-rimmed eyes that practically swam with booze. "Who's there! What the feck do ye want?"

"I'm... Jack," she said hesitantly, with a small wave. "We saw each other earlier. You're Candy right?"

"Oh, aye, I saw ye," Candy sneered. "Askin' after Shae, right out in frontae the gods an' everyone like a damned fool. Yer Barney's new fuck, ya?" she snorted. "Don' let his wife catch ye. She keeps a shiv in her hair."

"Ah, no," Jack said gently, starting to walk forward. "I'm a client. He's taking me back to my ship later."

"Good, don' stay 'ere," Candy said with a sneer. "Now get the fuck gone. This ain't yer place."

"You... live here?" Jack asked, taking a small step forward. A chill breeze off the ocean pricked her skin.

Candy snorted, then burst out laughing. "What? Are ye fuckin' daft? Of course I dinnae fuckin' live here. Ain't no one livin' here anymore."

"What happened?" Jack asked.

"She happened," Candy said, jabbing a thick finger down towards the cove. "She's what always happens."

"What do you mean?" Jack asked.

"Shady Shae, queen bitch of pirate's cove," Candy said, rolling her eyes. "She might no' hae tossed a torch herself, but she mightae well ha'. Ye stick around, she'll burn ye too, mark my words."

"I had a bad feeling about her too," Jack admitted.

Candy raised an unkempt eyebrow. "Oh so ye ha' met her." Candy's red-rimmed eyes swam as they tried to focus on Jack. "I dinnae recognize ye, so ye might be one o' Shae's new pets tryin' tae worm yer way intae my good graces again, but I'm too drunk tae care. If you're for real, then good on ye fer not fallin' for her hoity toity fake nobility bullshite. Most folks, she can charm th' skin offa."

"I watched her do that to my... partner," Jack sighed. "I've seen women like her before. I don't care for them."

"Well that's rich. Ye sure sound like one o' them. Guess it takes one tae know one, an all that," Candy said, clearly not caring about the casual insults she was lacing the conversation with.

"You make it sound like Shae sends spies after you," Jack said. The politics of this small island were bizarre.

"Aye," Candy nodded. "Ye cannae trust anyone 'round here."

"Why would she care?" Jack asked.

"I'm the best feckin' carpenter on this whole damn island, and Shae hates competition," Candy said, angry and proud.

"Don't take this the wrong way," Jack cautioned, " but why not just kill you?"

Candy snorted, then burst out laughing. "Oh, aye. Seems simpler, yeah? Ye just dinnae understand Shae. Dead people, she cannae use. She'd rather make folks wish they were dead, and have no one tae turn to but her."

"Well that's horrifying," Jack said, suddenly far more concerned about Will.

"Welcome tae Shady's Cove," Candy said sarcastically. "What the feck's a fancy lass like ye doin' in this pisshole anyway?"

"I was shipwrecked," Jack said.

"And ye went tae Shae?" Candy snorted. "Ye're fecked."

"Thanks," Jack said flatly.

"Aye, yer welcome." Candy said. "Anyway, feck off. Th' sun's dippin, and this is no place for a fancy lass tae be after dark."

Jack gave her a sympathetic smile. There was something disarming about Candy's total lack of basic politeness. It was honest, which after dealing with people like Shea and Morant, was a welcome change. "Sorry to intrude. I just wanted to be alone for a bit. I didn't know anyone else would be up here."

"Aye, no one comes up here," Candy said, waving her hand dismissively. "Ye shouldn't either."

"Is there a better place to go?" Jack asked.

"The feck off this gods forsaken rock," the redhead turned her chair around and leaned it back against the charred table, staring out at the horizon. "Sell yer busted ship, book passage with someone else, and don't ever come back."

Jack wanted to ask more questions, but she felt like she'd pushed her luck with the volatile drunk woman already. She turned away and headed back to the steps, not sure of where to go next. She looked over her shoulder after she was a ways away and did a double take. She squinted and her vision cleared, but for a moment, through the glare and the mist, she swore she'd seen another woman sitting with Candy.

She rubbed her eyes and muttered to herself about being too tired, then walked back to the eagle stones to watch the glittering sea.

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The round-faced girl bobbing happily on the end of Will's cock had jet black curly hair, bright blue eyes, and an adorable splash of freckles across her face. He gripped both posts on either side of the bed, groaning in pleasure as she jerked his shaft expertly with her hands and swirled her tongue around his knob inside her mouth.

"That feels amazing," he groaned. "What... was your name again?"

She popped her mouth off his cock with a laugh and a grin. "Calista," she said with a giggle. "Call me Calli."

Shae lounged in a worn but luxurious chaise only a few feet away. One of her legs was draped off the edge of the long lounge chair, and her fancy dress was pulled up enough that the slit let her toss the fabric aside and open her knees wide. Her fingers were idly dressing small patterns through the black thatch of hair between her legs as she watched Calli suck Will's cock.

"I told you that you'd find our deal sweet," Shae smiled. Her eyes were lidded low, full of sly promises.

Calli lifted up higher on her knees and let her peasant-style dress fall down around her waist. She was a bit on the plump side, with a softness around her waist, and large pale breasts topped with areolas only a slight shade darker than the rest of her skin. He'd never seen their like before. There was only a thin line where her nipples should be. At first he thought they were missing, but now he could tell that they'd retreated into her body somehow. She saw him looking and laughed as she popped off his cock. "Oh, they're there. They're just shy." She grabbed her areolas between her fingers and pinched, tugging, rolling and teasing her nipples to hardness, coaxing them out as she wrapped her breasts around his shaft.

"Ever had a girl do this for ye," she asked in a faintly accented voice that reminded him of Belita's Casterly Isle brogue. She leaned and girated, pumping his cock up and down in the soft valley of her breasts. She dipped her head down to lick the tip as it peeked out from her soft mounds.

"Yes," he said. "It's really nice."

She pouted a little. "Most fellas haven't. I like tae surprise 'em."

"You'll have to be more creative than usual," Shea said from her chair.

"Yes, mistress," Calli nodded happily.

"That's a good girl," Shea said in a throaty whisper. Calli's eyes fluttered like she was being pleasured by the words alone. She drooled out a long string of saliva down her cleavage and redoubled her efforts to pleasure Will. He let his eyes closed and exhaled as the sensations of her soft breasts and warm mouth alternated across his cock.

In spite of the attractive brunette coaxing incredible sensations from his cock, Will's eyes kept drifting towards Shae. He was infatuated. She was powerful and mysterious, clever and generous. She reminded him of a queen from a storybook. He was lucky he'd found her.

She seemed happy and amused when she caught him looking at her rather than Calli. "I believe we were discussing shipping routes through the Chains," Shae said, sounding more like she was seducing a love than talking business.

"You're a hell of a negotiator," Will muttered.

"I am," Shae agreed. "This is only a taste of what I can offer you in trade for loyalty and service."

Loyalty. Something about the way she said it caught in his head like a skipping gear, but his momentary discomfort and confusion was quickly washed away by a tide of warm happiness at the idea of pleasing her. He found himself loving the idea of making Shae happy with him.

"The Chains are easy to get through," he said between slow breaths and groans. He stroked the side of Calli's face, glancing down at her with wordless appreciation. She grinned around his hard shaft and looked sideways at Shae for approval. She was a bit disappointed that Shae's attention was on Will, so she contented herself with doing as she'd been told with well practiced skills.

"There's buoys and marking flags all through the islands. They're color coded," Will explained slowly, trying to keep his concentration as the serving girl in front of him sucked and bobbed. "Ships that follow the right sequence of colors are left alone. Ships that take wrong turns are raided. You just have to know what that month's color sequence is."

"Is that how they do it? Clever," Shae said, tilting her head in thought. Her hand never stopped moving between her legs. "How do they distribute that information?"

"The Shackles," Will said, rocking his hips against Calli's chest. "The two big islands at the edge of the Chains, furthest from the coast."

"Where the shipyard is?" Shae asked. She plunged two fingers inside herself and bit her lip, clearly getting more excited as they spoke.

"That's the one," Will groaned. He watched Shae pleasure herself and felt the tension building in his balls. "There's a bar there. It's run by the Malaharan Slaver's Guild. They give the sequence to anyone with the brand."

"So I need to find one of the Branded," Shae said as she rocked her hips, her pleasure building in time with her planning.

"It isn't that simple," Will cautioned Shae, his focus drawn even more towards the captivating woman in white. He was still aware of what Calli was doing, but it mattered so much less than making sure Shae understood the dangers he was talking about.

"You can be rougher with her," Shae interrupted. "She is for you to use."

Will hesitated for a moment and looked down at the pale girl between his knees. He'd never been the type to be rough with a woman, but Shae's encouragement made him reconsider. A silent conversation happened as Calli's eyes met his. They both glanced to Shae, then to each other again. Calli gave him a small nod, as eager to please him, and Shae, as he was. He hooked his hand behind Calli's neck and pulled her a little further down his aching manhood. Her eyes bulged a bit, but she didn't protest.

"What were you saying about the Branded?" Shae asked, drawing lazy circles between her legs as she watched Calli gag and strain against Will's length.

Will groaned and held Calli's head in place, slowly thrusting as deep as she could take and then releasing. She was obviously struggling, but still didn't push him away. He talked between thrusts. "They have all kinds of ways of signaling if they're being coerced. That's how they've kept their system a secret for so long. If they have any hint of suspicion that someone with the brand isn't actually one of them, that ship will never come out the other side of the Chains."

Calli finally coughed too hard and pulled back. Will let her go and smiled as she gasped for air. "You alright?" he asked.

She nodded, blinking back the tears in her eyes as she smiled. "I just can't go that deep for that long." Shae made a small sound of judgement and disappointment, and Calli looked mortified. "I'll do better, I promise!"

Before either of them could say anything, the short serving girl had her mouth wrapped around Will's shaft again, forcing herself as deep as she could go. She put Will's hand on the back of her head, and pulled a bit, encouraging him to be rougher with her, but her eyes never met his. They were firmly sideways, watching Shae.

Shae ignored her as soon as she was back to servicing Will again. She smiled like a hunting cat and buried her fingers inside herself. "I'm sure I can coerce one of the Branded to work for me."

"You are very persuasive," Will said, watching her fingers plunge and dance through her thick dark hair.

"Why thank you, William," she purred. "Now, tell me about your ship. Who is her captain, and her patron?"

Her praise rolled over him like blissful static. His skin prickled with goosebumps and his cock tightened again to the edge of pain. Her praise was like a drug, and he wanted more. He panted as Calli fisted his cock, stroking madly and plunging her mouth down on him with an energy that bordered on manic. His orgasm wouldn't be stopped. Not with so much stimulation, and the bliss of being praised. He grabbed Calli's head with both hands and groaned out a pulsing flood of cum into her eager mouth. She made a sound of surprised protest and coughed a bit. For a moment she tried to pull back but relaxed after the surprise subsided. She swallowed as best she could as he held her there, but quickly resorted to simply opening her mouth and letting his white spend drool out the sides and onto her breasts.

After he'd caught his breath he finally answered. "The ship is the Kestrel. Her patron is an Imperial noble named Morant. He's a ruthless, gutless sack of shit. The captain's name is Belita Vex."

Shae's fingers abruptly pulled free and she leaned forward in her chair, all seductive pretense gone in an instant. "You are sailing with Captain Vex?"

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Jack sat on the ancient steps tearing herself in two. It had been a good day. She and Will had managed to work together decently well and get back some of the synchronicity they'd once had. It felt like progress, and it had been nice to talk honestly and spend some time alone together. Still, things felt wrong now, and she was having a harder time than usual ignoring it. She found herself wanting to distance herself from everyone. Will. Bella. Quinn. She spun her ring on her finger like a worry stone and wondered if they would all be better off without her.

It would be easy to disappear in a place like this. Shea was a conniving spider of a woman, but Jack could work with that. She'd done it before. Hell, she'd been that before. Part of her own intense dislike came from recognizing things in Shae that reminded her of herself. On the other hand, the familiarity was strangely comforting. She knew it would be easy to worm her way into the good graces of the pirate queen. There was a twisted sort of appeal to the idea.

She shook her head, annoyed at herself for even entertaining the thought. That was exactly the kind of person she was desperately trying not to be anymore. She had to hold herself accountable, especially when it was hard.

In the past, she'd gotten good at shielding herself from accountability by throwing up walls of indignation and justifications. She told herself that if everyone fully understood the situation, they'd see that she was right, and that it shouldn't matter that she had to keep secrets because they should be willing to trust her. She had convinced herself that everything she'd done was for other people's benefit, and they just didn't understand the sacrifices she'd made for them. It was bullshit, but for a while it had been a good way to hold back the tide of guilt inside her. Now, she couldn't muster the anger, and without it she was left with the inescapable recognition that she'd never given Will or Bella a choice.

It was a hard thing to admit to herself, but the alternative was running away again. It was well past time to take responsibility for the harm she caused. It didn't matter how necessary it had seemed at the time. One of her father's most annoying sayings was 'intentions are no shield against consequences.' It had always sounded pretentious to her, but now she could see how right he was.

Did the ends ever justify the means? Were the ends even real, or were they just an excuse to feel like she'd made a difference? Had she actually saved Bella's life? She believed she did, but what if Bella had managed to cure herself alone, like she claimed. What if everything Jack had done was ultimately pointless? What if her entire justification for plunging all their lives into pain and isolation was wrong? What was she left with if ambiguity robbed her of certainty?

She no longer had the strength of her previous convictions, and she no longer felt like she deserved any of the things she had been trying to accomplish. The tide of guilt had filled her, and the hole where she had kept it was a bleak and lifeless core. All her confidence and competence was a performance. She had been pretending to be what she used to be so no one would know what she had become. She just couldn't lie to herself anymore. No matter how much she tried to make amends, undo the damage, and help Will understand the nature of what she had done to him, it would never give him back the time he'd lost or erase the suffering he'd been through.

It was the same feeling that had gotten her into this mess in the first place.

There was nothing that frightened Jack more than helplessness. She'd face any danger with nothing but her wits and skills, but some things couldn't be challenged. When Bella said she was dying, Jack hadn't been able to accept it. Instead of comforting the woman she loved and making the most of the time they had left, she'd buried herself in a library to try to find a solution. When she found one she left, and took Will with her.

Whether Bella had saved herself, or if Jack's gambit had worked, either way she'd still left Bella to face death alone.

She hated herself for it. The part of her she hated wanted to abandon everything. She could still do her job and get the Kestrel repaired, but then stay behind. Her skills would be useful to someone like Shae. She'd left Will and Bella behind before, and they'd been better off without her. Quinn would be even easier to leave, and she could undo Will's curse in the process. Then they'd all be free of her. This was as good a place as any to start over.

Her jaw clenched and she squeezed her hands so hard her knuckles popped. What the fuck was wrong with her today? She wasn't going stay in some random pirate town while Will and Bella headed off on a suicidal mission that she'd gotten them into. She needed to get her head on straight, but she knew she wouldn't be able to until she sorted out everything she was feeling. She just had to pull it apart and analyze it, like any other problem. She was all twisted up and distracted. She needed to follow the thread a little at a time. When had things gone wrong today? The bar. Will. Shae. She'd been jealous, and wary, but there was more to it. She'd blacked, and let herself be ushered away. That wasn't like her at all. Why had she given in so easily? She focused on the memory.

Will was different now, but the depth of the change hadn't really sunk in until she'd seen him interact with Shae. She'd recognized it all. The opportunism, being willing to take risks, isolating himself and justifying it as necessary for the job. The seductive lure of a situation that was obviously dangerous. She knew that behavior inside and out. He'd always been the more cautious of the two of them, but that had obviously changed. After their standoff with the Inquisitors on Barcola, she was afraid. It was an all too familiar pattern.