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She leans over and kisses me, and we embrace. She says, "Even if there are times you don't remember me, even when you cannot remember me at all anymore, I will always remember you. And your children will always remember you. And we will always love you. And that's what matters."
"I love you. Lorene." I say, haltingly. "I...." I couldn't think of what to say.
"It's okay." She replies. "It will always be okay. I will always be here for you."
Time drifts and tumbles. I know I am at peace now. A warm afterglow, crying and happy at the same time. Why was I crying? Why was I happy? I suddenly can't remember. Eventually, a man comes into my room. He asks, "Are you ready for supper? Do you need help?"
"Why would I need help? Who are you? Get out of here!" I bark at him annoyed by this intrusion. But I soon realize, I actually DO need help.
"Wait... Come back..." I say, but the man is still there, unshaken. "It's all right. I'm here to help," he says, smiling. I realize there are a lot of people here right now, guests in my mother's house. Only I don't recognize the house, or any of the guests, and I ask the man where Mom is and he only shakes his head. It doesn't matter. I'm pretty tired anyway.
That night, I dream of my girlfriend Lorene, both of holding hands as we watch the sunset together on the hillside above Mom's house, in Vermont, and time stands still and we are still young, and our hearts burn for each other. And then time stands still while drifting and tumbling over itself, into nothing. Maybe she'll visit me here one of these days. The woman. Beautiful, dark hair and sparkling eyes. I can't think of her name right now...
- COMMENTS
teedeedubalmost 3 years agoWell, none of us will ever know what it is like. There is no coming back to tell about it. It is much more than heartbreaking to watch your partner slowly drift away. My wife is only 62 but we are in year 5 and the 'gone' time just gradually increases and I, like so many others, are dreading the day when she no longer knows who we are. 37 years married in June. I have no idea if your story is accurate or not. I certainly hope that it is not, but I quietly fear that it may well be.
Thanks for sharing.......
Anonymousabout 3 years agoWell written. The stream of consciousness narrative seemed to capture the essence of what it must be like to have dementia. And yet we still learn so much about the narrator, which makes the story so much more poignant.
Well done.
AileyInnabout 3 years agoBeautiful. As an old guy seeing cracks in the armor, I so hope that my wife can be patient with me or me with her. Recently watched my mom fade away. Dementia is cruel. She saw it as it advanced and ended up just not being there anymore. Again, thank you for your story.
Thefirefliesabout 3 years agoThis story is beautifully sad, evoking so many genuine feelings. Five stars.
Anonymousabout 3 years agoSweet story. I watched my father struggle with early dementia. His memories were fleeting, and his stories always the same. But he couldn’t remember what happened ‘yesterday’. I only pray to never know the frustration of it myself. Your character’s wife is just as it should be. Loving. Understanding. Patient. Thank you for this sweet little vignette.
